Demons Vs Trees

Our party was making our way through a desert, only to find a forest of cedar, growing in straight lines. Finding a obviously man-created forest in the middle of a desert was a little odd, so our druid (who speaks plant languages) decided to introduce himself. 

Druid: Hello, I’m-
Tree: Do you have the stuff? Am I growing straight enough? I can grow straighter if you give me the stuff!
Druid: The…. Stuff?
Tree: Yeah. You know. The stuff.
Druid: I have no clue what the stuff is.
Tree: Guys, he doesn’t have the stuff. (The other trees groan.) Why would you even come if you don’t have the stuff? 

Meanwhile, the fighter and enchanter find some rocks scattered all over the place that could be used in very strong plant growth potions. They relay this information to the druid.

Druid: I don’t have the stuff, but I can try something. (He casts a spell for speeding plant growth)
Tree: Yes! Yes! Again! More! Do it again!
GM: The trees outside the spell radius are getting agitated and are shaking. They are yelling at you for not casting it on them.
Druid: Holy shit guys, these are addict trees.

Later, in the same forest, we get into an encounter involving a bunch of low level demons.  

Fighter: There’s a lot of them, so no stealing my kills! (Starts off towards the nearest target)
Enchanter: (Uses a spell that vaporizes all of the demons in a 30ft radius)
Fighter: Seriously? What did I just say? (Heads after another)
Druid: (Quietly hands a note to the GM)
GM: Suddenly, the trees begin to shake and branches start falling off left and right. You head thuds through out all of the forest. Luckily, none of you seem to even get a scratch- but all of the demons are dead. After investigating, you find there were more than you thought there were. Maybe about 300 total.
Fighter: Are you kidding me with all this? I wanted to smash something.
Druid: So umm. I might have promised that any trees who helped us in the fight would get a growth spell. We might be in the forest for a while.
Enchanter: I’m still getting over that the battle was won by addict trees.

I thought you weren't going to be a bitch!?

Me: I’m going to do my best to not play a total bitch character this time.
DM: alright sounds good.

*in session, 4 PCs meet. Their parents have known each other for years. Many of them having sexual relations during their travels*

*my Tiefling gets into an argument with the half dragon, while 2 others watch*

Tiefling: Well I know that your mom was kinda crazy. So you looking as scary as you do makes a lot of sense.
Half Dragon: Who the hell do you think you are talking to me about my family like that? You don’t know my parents?
Tiefling: What are you talking about? My mom has fucked your parents!

Everyone (out of character, to me): WHAT THE FUCK!!
DM: You said you wouldn’t be a bitch!
Me: I’m sorry guys…..

The DM got up and walked away shortly after.

I have a few thoughts about Keyleth’s new tattoos...

Let’s start this off by saying I am not here to start drama that is the last thing that I want or need right now. I have always been an avid Keyleth/Marisha supporter because she gets far too much hate as it is. However, these tattoos really aren’t that ok. There will be a few Māori words in here so if you don’t get it just google it. Under the read more because it got very wordy.

Keep reading

So Team RWBY, does Blake dislike going to the doctor like cats hate going to the vet? If so, how do you get her there? Maybe some sort of trickery or a carrier? (Asked by anon)
  • Weiss, with a sigh: The only time we ever needed to get Blake to the infirmary was when she got food poisoning this one weekend.
  • Blake, covering her face: Oh my god please don't tell anyone about this.
  • Ruby: I mean. We DID tell you not to get the sushi.
  • Blake, burying her face deeper into her hands out of shame: I thought they would've known how to properly handle fish!!
  • Yang, eyeing Blake and with an 'If you just listened' tone: Dude...we told you like three times EACH not to get it. I mean seriously...it was a /pizza place/ that served sushi...
  • Weiss, with crossed arms: And YOU, were foolish enough to trust that sushi.
  • Ruby, groaning in the memory: It took all three of us AND Nora to drag you to the infirmary.
  • Blake, now curled up in a ball on the floor: Guys please.
  • Weiss, stomping her foot down: And /I/ had to pay one hundred and twenty lien to get Nora's outfit dry-cleaned because SOMEBODY vomitted on it!
  • Yang, grumpily: Not to mention Ruby and I had to clean the halls from here to the infirmary.
  • Blake, with tears streaming down her face comically: Guys I'm sooooo sorryyyyyyy
My love is on fire





For Jin’s flower girl

Hope you like it