long post cw

Fictober18 Day 8.

Fandom: Gravity Falls ||  CW: Manipulation  ||  “I know you do.“

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“Hey, better you found out from me than from him stabbing you in the back, right!”

“Of course, Bill.” Ford halfheartedly smiled at him, the expression falling back down again when he stopped putting the effort into it. It’s not that he wasn’t appreciative. He was, but…

Bill put a hand on his shoulder, floating over his head. “Come on, lighten up, IQ.”

“I’m sorry. It’s just… Fiddleford was my only friend for a long time.” Ford spoke openly. “I wouldn’t expect him to well… pull an ‘Edison.’”

Not on him, at least. Although, really he wouldn’t have expected Fiddleford to plan on doing something like that to anyone. He’d known Fidds for several years during college. He knew him. Or… well, he thought he knew him…

“You knew him back THEN. People change a lot in six years!” Bill floated a bit away from him to point at him. “Plus, you’re a horrible judge of character!! That’s what I’m here for though, smart guy!” He said, certainly to reassure him.

“I thought you were here for intellectual inspiration.” Ford teased lightly.

“Some from column A some from column B!” Bill waved a hand. “On the bright side, you’ve at least got one friend who cares about you for more than your work!”

Ford genuinely lightened up a bit from that. “Thank you, Bill, for warning me and being a true friend. I really appreciate it.”

Bill’s eye crinkled up happily. “I know you do!” He threw his arm his shoulder. “Now just watch out for that engineer, huh. If he starts acting shady, you know what’s really going on.”

!!  guys guys guys so I weighed myself today (I generally only do it once per month, for a variety of reasons) and holy shit I’m officially at 141lbs (64kg) on the dot and I’m so, so proud of myself right now.  I’ve worked so hard to get back down to a healthy size for my body (one thing we learned through this whole this is, surprise, I actually never lost that tiny frame I had as a child, which is why my body couldn’t bear the weight of being 200lbs the way someone else’s might’ve been able to, and why I was constantly in pain) and I’m just so, so proud of myself.  I don’t have a “goal weight” because to me it isn’t about numbers on a scale, it’s about being fit and healthy (especially important for me because I was born with a heart condition), but sixty pounds lost (over 20kg) is just.  I’m so proud of myself, because sometimes it’s so hard to not just binge and overeat, and I feel like I’m getting closer and closer to my general fitness goals?  my stamina is increasing, my pain is decreasing, the loose skin I had is tightening (I’m really trying to work on my back rn), and like.  even back in April there was such a difference.

I’ve always liked hiking, esp in the mountains, but it’s been so hard to do that for me.  Before this past April, the last time I’d gone hiking on a mountain trail was back in 2014, and I was so winded I couldn’t go more than a few minutes without begging my friends for a rest because I couldn’t breathe, and drank all my water.  And yet, when I was hiking a mountain in Innsbruck, I went a few hours before stopping for a break, and never felt like I couldn’t breathe.  And that was six months ago!  Imagine how much progress I’ve made since then!  Furthermore, because I’m now down sixty pounds, I might be able to ski again because with my hardcore inserts and having less weight bearing down on my arches, said arches have been able to build back up, which means that hopefully I’ll be able to ski again with my family, something my weight and arches has physically prevented for three years now.

I’m just.  Very excited.  I’m so much happier and so much healthier and I wanted to share it if anyone else is struggling because god, you guys, to be and feel healthy again is just… it’s so amazing.  I wouldn’t even recognize the person I was two years ago.  I was thinking of posting some comparison photos, because I hadn’t realized how much my physical appearance had changed (like, holy shit, I can see why people who haven’t seen me in a couple years barely recognized me), but.  It’s really difficult to take full-body photos by myself xD  But I can try!  I was also thinking of moving a bunch of this stuff to a sideblog or something like that, but I’m on the fence.  Point being, though, that I’m just very, very proud of myself and it just goes to show you how much power your will and your mindset can have.

::**HALSEY PLOTS

To celebrate the one-year anniversary of susierpt, I had you all vote on what you wanted me to do – and a masterlist of plot bunnies inspired by Halsey songs won! Feel free to use these ideas, and if you like them, a like or a reblog is much appreciated. Thanks for one year of RPT, everyone!

  • trouble: muse a and muse b are in a tempestuous, destructive relationship. the two raise hell together by day, but by night, behind closed doors, they argue and fight all the time, muse a seeming to almost take pleasure in tormenting muse b. but despite how awful muse a can be, muse b stays with them, the passion and excitement of the relationship intoxicating them. muse b will gladly allow muse a to set them on fire – just so long as they do not leave them. muse a, in turn, is too proud to admit that they need muse b. if muse b ever did get tired of their shit and leave them, they have no idea what they’d do. the two are trapped in a cycle that’s headed for mutually assured destruction, but neither are willing to get themselves out.
  • colors: muse a is muse b’s ex. the two were together for a long time, and the relationship was a transformative one for muse a. being with muse b made them into someone new – but ultimately, muse b didn’t like who that was. the two broke up, despite muse a still being very much in love. the two haven’t really spoken since the breakup, but now, muse a is watching from a distance as muse b falls apart. always someone with a lot of personal demons and problems to wrestle with, it seems muse b can’t cope alone, but they’re far too proud to admit it. will muse b allow muse a back into their life to help them? and will the two ever be able to salvage their relationship – or at least their friendship? and how can muse a help when the loss of their love has left them damaged, too?
  • strange love: muse a and muse b run with vastly different social circles, but meet one night at a party held by a mutual acquaintance. although muse b is known for being distant, cool, and untouchable, something about muse a charms them, and the two end up talking about deep, personal matters, things they never thought they’d discuss with anyone, let alone a complete stranger. one thing leads to another, and the two wind up hooking up in the bathroom. the next day, muse a wakes up to find out that someone captured pictures of them making out with muse b – and that they’re all over social media. muse a and muse b now must attempt to navigate an attempt at a relationship, while dealing with the rumors and gossip surrounding them.
  • roman holiday: muse a and muse b are childhood friends. grew up next door to each other, went through school together, played games together, the whole shebang. they also found refuge in one another from their awful family situations, both coming from abusive households. one day, after the two have finished high school, it becomes too much. muse a shows up at muse b’s bedroom window in the middle of the night, after a particularly bad night with their parents, and tells muse b they’re leaving forever – and they want muse b to come with them. the two pack their things, get in muse a’s car, and drive off into the night, intent on never seeing their parents again. the further they drive, the less they can deny their own romantic feelings towards each other, and soon, it becomes the vacation from reality that they’d always dreamed of; far away from their parents, happily kissing and sleeping curled up with each other in the backseat. but vacations from reality can’t last forever… right?
  • ghost: muse a is a self-described “bad influence,” and they warned muse b as much when they first got involved. at first, the relationship was passionate, fun, and loving, but over time, muse b watched muse a become less and less interested in them. soon, their relationship went from committed and exclusive to open and casual – but still possessive. both claim that they are “non-exclusive” and can sleep with other people, and both do, but muse b is still far more invested in the relationship. still, neither of them can bring themselves to break it off completely. no matter how many other people they sleep with, muse a will always come back to muse b for “one last fuck,” and no matter how much they claim to hate muse a, muse b will always let them.
  • 100 letters: muse a was a very, very bad partner to muse b. always tearing them down and insulting them, and making them feel alone. finally, muse b got sick of this shit, and walked out, finally standing up for themselves. now, muse a wants them back, but muse b isn’t having it. muse a sends muse b a letter every single day, declaring their love, ignoring muse b as they threatened to take them to court for stalking them. whose patience will snap first?
  • eyes closed: muse a and muse b used to be dating, but broke up. muse a is over it, but muse b isn’t. to cope, muse b has thrown themselves into a relationship with muse c – and it isn’t working. although muse c is devoted to them, muse b still has feelings for muse a, and just can’t seem to move on. torn between wanting to win muse a back and avoid hurting muse c, muse b stays in their unfulfilling relationship, stringing muse c along further just to avoid being alone.
  • coming down: muse a was in a really bad situation when they met muse b, and muse be managed to “save” them somehow. this resulted in muse a falling hopelessly in love with them. although muse b cares for them, the feeling isn’t entirely mutual. it’s unclear how much of muse a’s devotion to muse b is actual love, and how much is just gratitude. either way, muse b is perfectly willing to exploit it, using muse a’s devotion to them to get things done – no matter how unpleasant or outright immoral.
  • hurricane: muse a is a player, preying on younger, vulnerable people, using them for sex before moving on to the next one, muse b is their karma. muse b is fiercely independent, and actively seeks out muse a, because they know they can count of them for meaningless sex. however, muse a falls fast and hard for muse b, and is now given a taste of their own medicine when they find themselves chasing a relationship with someone who doesn’t care for them at all.
  • strangers: two girls, muse a and muse b, have begun a secret relationship, hiding it from their family and friends. muse a wouldn’t mind keeping it a secret, if muse b wouldn’t stop insisting that this isn’t, in fact, a relationship. muse b claims that it’s just a meaningless fling, but muse a isn’t convinced. muse a wants muse b to commit to them, even if not publicly, but muse b refuses – at least, for now.
  • young god: muse a is the child of a cop, and a total goody-goody. they’ve never broken the rules in their life, and believes in the police force as the ultimate force for good. muse b, however, has other ideas. muse b has fashioned themselves a vigilante, tracking down and punishing criminals themselves, changing the world, one assault at a time. when muse a and muse b begin to fall for each other, muse b persuades muse a to question the law for the first time, and join their crusade. but muse b isn’t exactly a pinnacle of goodness or justice, no matter how hard they try, and their life is a dangerous one. muse a wants to help them change the world, but how far is too far?
  • closer: okay, you know this one. muse a and muse b went out for awhile a few years ago, but split up for whatever reason. now, years later, they find each other again in a hotel bar. despite all the reasons the relationship failed the first time, the two decide to get back together again – just for one night. for one night, they’ll pretend their breakup never happened, and that the outside world doesn’t exist.
  • sorry: muse a is a very insecure person. for a variety of reasons, they believe that no one will ever truly love them. muse b, however, is determined to prove them wrong. but years and years of feeling completely alone and unlovable don’t vanish overnight, and muse a frequently pulls away from muse b, expecting that soon, they’ll leave anyway. unfortunately, this has become a form of self-sabotage – the more muse a expects muse b to leave, the more they withdraw, and the more muse b does actually consider leaving. 
  • bad at love: muse a is someone who’s suffered a lot of personal problems and heartbreak, and has been left a broken, lonely, dysfunctional person. convinced that finding their soulmate will “fix” them, they’ve gone through a lot of short-lived relationships. the latest is with muse b. muse a is, as always, convinced that this relationship will be the one to solve all their problems. muse b likes muse a, but knows that they can’t save them – muse a will have to do that themselves.

I listened to the audio of the EWP’s production of N2N and I love how much having an all Asian cast adds so many little nuances to the story without having to actually change anything, particularly with:

  • the stigma regarding mental illness in a lot of Asian cultures and how much more painful that makes Diana’s story.
    • This also adds a whole new layer to the fact that Dan tries to ignore his depression for so many years, in favour of helping Diana.
  • the whole “all Asians are smart” stereotype in relation to Natalie’s stress over her grades and academic future. It sheds a whole new light on to why she would stress about Yale as much as she does, especially with the fact that a lot of Asian households do value academic success very highly.
  • the neglect towards Natalie and the focus on Gabe in relation to the elephant in the room about how a lot of Asian cultures still value sons over daughters. This adds an entirely new layer to Natalie’s pain regarding being ignored by her mother and so many lines in Superboy and the Invisible Girl
    • “He’s a hero, a lover, a prince/She’s not there”
    • “He’s the one you wish would appear/He’s your hero, forever your son”
    • “I love you as much as I can

This show works so wonderfully with an all Asian cast and manages to address so many harmful stereotypes/sheds light on a lot of issues within Asian communities without having to change ANY aspect of the show and just… this is why diversity is important. A diverse cast can add a whole new interpretation to a show that might have never otherwise addressed it because it wouldn’t have originally been written with that kind of narrative in mind. I doubt Tom Kitt and Brian Yorkey were attempting to make statements regarding the stigma of mental illness, pressure of academic success, and gender inequality in Asian cultures when they first wrote Feeling Electric, but thats what an all Asian cast contributes to the show. Diverse casting can help a show as much as it can help the actors.

  • Psychic: *reads my mind*
  • Me: go and look it up the poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS SPINNING poor gUYS HEAD IS 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  • Psychic: what the fuck
5

based on the headcanon that Asriel really likes sonic games, while Chara tolerates them if it means getting to play games with their bro

meanwhile, Frisk sulks in their room because there are only two controllers in the household and they’re too proud to admit they want to join in

no more, kiddo!! go feel included!! play as the weird not-actually-a-sonic-character-but-he’s-here-anyway-for-some-reason monkey you were born to control!! u deserve it

HELP! I CAN’T SEE AND I NEED GLASSES!

***

Hey guys i hate to do this but im really broke atm. I am currently applying for jobs with no success, so i am being put on a paid internship by the government in a month or more. But as of right now im living off about $200 a month.

I have terrible eyesight and have been using my dads old glasses. i got a free eyecheck & prescription details last month and my vision has gotten worse. I have frequent headaches because im not using my own prescription.

If you could spare some money and help me be able to see the world around me comfortably it would mean SO much to me. If you want i can send you a doodle in exchange for donation, my laptop is broken so it can’t be digital though im sorry 😞

I won’t be able to afford food and transportation if i buy glasses, this is a basic necessity and i HATE that i have to beg strangers for money to buy it, but im afraid i do

Paypal: paypal.me/dantecool

I have that one adjective on my mind but what’s the word? I try Google and the dictionary/thesaurus and still can’t find it. Sometimes even the easiest of words can be a struggle; it happens. Eventually it came to me or I made a discovery in something I was reading. These are those words, with added extras that I thought would be good to use. To be updated if I find more.

A: abhorrent, abrasive, absurd, abysmal, accrue, adage, affirm, affront, aghast, agitate, agony, amicable, amid, ardent, ascend, audacious, autonomy

B: balk, baritone, benevolent, bereft, bewilder, bitter, blanch, bravado, brisk, bristle, broad, brusque

C: chaste, chortle, clench, clinical, cohesion, coil, command, complacent, compliant, condescend, contemplative, copious, cordial, covet, coy, crass, croon 

D: debauch, decisive, deign, denigrate, derisive, derision, desolate, despair, detest, devotion, dilate, diminish, discern, disdain, disgruntle, dismissive, distraught, droll, dulcet, dull

E: effusive, elate, elation, embolden, enigma, enrapture, ensue, enthrall, errant, ensconced, evasive, exacerbate, exalt, exasperate, exemplary, exhale, exposition

F: feign, ferocity, fervor, fizzle, flinch, flippant, flourish, flummoxed, fluster, forlorn, fragile, frail, frantic, frown, fury, futile

G: gasp, gilded, glower, grim, grimace, grotesque, gruesome, gulp, gurgle, guttural

H: halt, haphazard, haughtily, heinous, hiss, hoarsely, holistic, huff, hyperbolic 

I: immaculate, impenetrable, impervious, imploring, imposing, inadequate, incandescent, incredulous, indescribable, indignant, indomitable, inebriate, incessant, infallible, innocuous, insipid, intense, intone, intrinsic, invasive, irrefutable, irrevocable

J: jitter, jolt, jovial 

K: keen, kinetic

L: languid, lewd, limb, listless, lithe, livid, lolled, lull

M: macabre, magnificent, malice, masochist, merriment, ministration, monotony, murmur, myriad

N: nondescript, nonplussed, novice

O: obliterate, obscure, obstinate, obtrusive, obtuse, ominous, oneiric, onerous

P
: painstakingly, palpable, passive, pertinent, phlegmatic, placid, plaintive, platitude, pliant, plied, preen, proffered, pulse, punitive

Q
: quaint, quirk, quiver

R
: rapid, rasp, recoil, renowned, repetition, resign, reticent, retort, reverberated, ruminating, ruthless

S
: sardonic, savage, scrutiny, seedy, semantics, sentient, serene, sheen, shudder, simmer, smug, snarl, sneer, snickered, solace, sooth, sordid, spasm, spur, squeak, staccato, stammer, stave, stern, stoic, stoked, strain, stricken, stroke, stubble, stunning, succinct, sullen, sultry, surge, susceptible, sycophant

T: tacit, taciturn, taut, tawdry, tender, tentative, thrash, thrill, thrive, throb, toneless, trembling, tremor, tumultuous, twitch

U
: utter, utile

V
: validity, vehement, venal, versatile, visceral, vitriol, void, voracious

W
: wean, whim, whimper, whir, wholly, wicked, winced, wistful, writhe

X-Z
: None

greengargouille  asked:

"#part of me wonders if there's an interest for like a#behind the scenes breakdown of what i was tryin to do with this one" Aah, personally I would be really interested in seeing one, if that's not trouble for you? (and wow, unrelated but reading that scene still makes me all kind of emotional even after multiple times, I think it's one of my favorites of your works)

(thank u so much!!) and Not at all! I’m one of those fools who loves talking about what they do, but the reassurance that I can go ahead and blab away is very nice :’3

I think I’ll stick with a bunch of just collected details for this one, which does mean more freedom, but the tradeoff is ya lose organization a lotta bit. BUT, LAUNCHING INTO IT 

Part 1 - Use of absolute black & white :

This is actually a carryover from an earlier attic au comic. Its a visual shorthand for being ‘trapped in the mindset of A Bad Place’ 

It was important to convey that sort of abrupt, stomach drop feeling of instantly transporting to ouch o’ clock. It’s just Reigen and the mere mention of the house so it had to s t i c k.

As we go along, the room begins to trickle back in, but Reigen’s still got a lot of black lingering, still recovering from that shock.

Even further on still, you can still see it hanging on in places. On one eye, clinging to some hair strands, and underneath his chin.

And when Reigen goes to describe it, we finally get the full black & white treatment.

The biggest thing here is that it sets up that it’s Ritsu imagining this, and that since he’s still in full color, he isn’t yet fully immersed.

Side note, the speech bubble here, since its still in that white-on-black, is supposed to imply that Reigen goes on to talk more, even without exact dialogue following. And then the following pictures convey the general impression of what he’s saying and hint at the passage of time. I don’t think I was as successful in my execution of this as I could have been, but I don’t think I confused any readers either so that worked out.

Also, even though Reigen’s telling the story, he’s absent in the b&w imagery, since this is all from Ritsu’s perspective. And at the moment, Ritsu’s focus is all on Mob.

Ritsu eventually joins in as his immersion increases.

And its only when Ritsu sees how talking about this is affecting Reigen, that Reigen is included in the imagery ayyyyy

And later, we get some direct validation on Ritsu’s part. That his struggles, while different, get treated with the same seriousness, and therefore get the same b&w space.

Callbacks

The “or you could-” exchange at the end is a callback to this one at the beginning.

Whereas before it was setup to get old memories to light, at the end, it’s repurposed to be ‘remember you count too’.

This panel in particular is a callback to 2 things, both with mirroring compositions:

Firstly to this moment in the other comic, and hey wouldja look at that, there’s the dreaded scissors too eyyy

Secondly, there is Reigen’s “voice” (the circles and marks) In the b&w version, they’re more wobbly and scratchy cause Reigen hasn’t spoken for a while. (also as a side note in the b&w version the noise goes thru Mogami but hits Mob bc, y’know. ghost.)

Lead up to Oh He’s Crying

The moment where it’s revealed it’s hurtin scoob Reig is important, so I put silly indicators ahead of time.

These top 4 panels have mirroring compositions. Down up, up down. But despite trying, they’re not true mirrors. Ritsu and Reigen aren’t seeing eye to eye. We view Ritsu head on, but we only view Reigen from the side. Not getting the full picture.

Until later down the page, when Ritsu fully looks at him.

Compounding after this moment, you’ll notice that the lighting for the comic is consistent, with one exception*. Which means ya got ur shadows to the lefthand side for Ritsu, and the righthand side for Reigen.

*There’s only one instance where the shading flips sides, and that’s-

Right here. Directly when Ritsu tries to picture it from Reigen’s POV, to picture him in the situation too, not just Mob. 

Gosh Darn It I Just Love Visual/Physical Metaphors/Symbols So They’re Everywhere.

We’ve already covered that scissors are a sore topic for Reigen, and its a symbol of something deeply hurting, so guess what.

ALSO Cards !!!

After Ritsu brings up the Mogami house, the card’s function changes from ‘fun fun game time’ to ‘emotional bargaining chips’. Fun to note that, even despite Ritsu’s expression here, Reigen still could have said no. He reached for the cards first, after all. It was only after he saw what it would mean for Ritsu that he relented.

Also important, I tried to show Ritsu as having many, many opportunities to keep trudging forward. He’s holding a plus 2 here.

He still has it.

And Reigen hadn’t followed all the rules. Ritsu could have tried to make Reigen keep going.

Which means yuuup when Ritsu shoves away the entire deck, its a visual metaphor for Ritsu choosing to discard heh his ability to bargain. In this moment he’s putting Reigen’s feelings first, even if Reigen doesn’t realize that himself. 

Bonus Stuffies

How Ritsu holds his cards :

Mob had a hand that could absolutely obliterate Ritsu, but he wants his bby bro to win.

And Reigen knew that. I love this conspiratorial look they share.

Also I made sure to match continuity of phantomrose’s fic for this, with the blue 5 and 4.

this is a moment that just personally speaks to me, mob bein happy to be able to say ‘see u soon’ to his family again ;__;

also yes ‘ichi’ as uno pun. probably not the right way of counting for japanese BUT THERE IT IS ANYWAYS

sometimes when i work the drawing doesn’t go well so i make a dumb doodle instead. take this

bonus bonus discord stuffies

final thoughts :