long poem

          “it has been a beautiful fight"

I know the sound a bottle makes
when it falls to the floor
and I’ve seen the sun rise
many times
from behind closed doors.

empty beds
and tangled sheets
       – it’s beautiful, you know –
the sunrise: pink clouds and navy trees
(the colors are wrong)
but it’s so damn beautiful
when shadows erode
and break away.

I can see it
even from behind these walls
– the moment everything changes
         we start to win
         we start to win for a while

and I can feel it
the touch of a leaf
blowing in the breeze
100 miles away
– it’s beating –
bum               bum
         bum              bum
a little heart on fire
shining golden with the dawn
– it’s blinding –
pounding against the night

can you feel it?
can you see it?
we have fought
 – even when we’ve lost –
we have fought

we are

          “it has been a beautiful fight


              – Charles Bukowski

"Rockin' That Bowl Haircut"

Jake just turned eight
Jimmy just turned seven
They were given a talk yesterday
About being independent

This morning by themselves
They picked out what to wear
Then Jimmy had the bright idea
To cut each other’s hair

You see, they were only half listening
To what mother had said, and were misled
As Jake placed a red mixing bowl
On Jimmy’s big bird nest head

She just wanted them to pour
Their own juice, and here
Jake was pretending with scissors
To cut off Jimmy’s ear

The bowl wouldn’t hold
There was just too much
So they duct taped it down
Until it wouldn’t budge

Then Jake chopped away
In a zig zag quickly
“I don’t know why mom says
Haircuts are tricky

This might hurt a bit”
Jimmy prepared a dramatic wince
Jake ripped the tape off
Jim said, “I didn’t feel a thing!”

But he looked wide at Jake
Whose face turned mixing bowl red
Staring at a patch of hair
On the tape instead of his head

“What happened? What did you do!”
Jimmy yelled at his brother
Who hid the tape behind his back
And whispered, “don’t wake mother”

But she was already awake
And loudly walking down the stairs
Jimmy was pulling at the bowl
While Jake was sweeping up the hair

Footsteps neared, Jimmy whispered,
“I think the bowl is stuck”
And gasped at his brother
Who awfully whispered, “Oh, fuck

Jimmy tried to comfort him
"At least it can’t get any worse?”
Until they heard their mother,
“Time for haircuts! Who’s first?”

Thanks for the rockin’ prompt, @definegodliness! (Although I didn’t use it in the poem, haha)

[My Little Book]

so i’ve decided to start working on a little project, a fictional story of love, loss, redemption, that kind of thing [i don’t wanna say too much rn, i might blab and give something important away xD] but anyway, yeah

the project’s tentative title is “Keith & Andy” and it’s basically about a group of friends, they’re in their 30′s and they’re trying to figure life out, but on top of that some of them are serious addicts, some are dealing with strong personal s*** but all of them are artists

it’s a project that i care deeply about and i would totally appreciate any feedback or anything from you guys! the next Keith & Andy post might be very long so that’s just a warning but yeah [i have a lot of ideas floating around in my head and writing them out into one cohesive piece instead of cutting it up into various bits just feels better for me, idk]

to recap [based on the first three Keith & Andy posts i’ve made so far] : keith is the narrator [but not necessarily the Main Character] and andy is his best friend/love interest. their friend group consists of sally [who is part three of the story’s central Trifecta], meg (a talented but small-time musician – she’s sort of on the outside of the story but she appears in some important parts … she’s more of a wise observer), tommy [a hothead, also a very skilled, talented, dedicated graffiti artist], sammy [sort of a love-able Nerd], lisa [used to be his girlfriend – she has a Difficult personality but cares deeply about the group and people in general], ken [this dude is out of it–he’s not a mean person on purpose, he’s just dealing with a lot and is out of touch with reality], and jeremiah [jeremiah passed away because of an overdose and part of the story is all of them dealing with that huge loss]

so, yeah, this is my little “book,” in a nutshell … tbh i’ve never dealt with so many characters at one time and this will certainly be a challenge but one i am looking forward to. hope you guys will come along for the ride!!

–Alex (@broken-bell)

Longing For Leaves

Entering my home
On this unseasonably autumn-like day
I move to get ready to sleep.
The back end of my house,
Smells like all the beautiful things
In life.
It smells like the oxidizing of oil paints,
It smells like the expanding wood of a guitar
It smells like the skin of a person I love, and my calligraphy love written on that skin in the dark.
It smells like memories and longing.
It smells the way that fall feels
Light and colored in comfort.
The newness that will be imminent.
The beautification of dormancy.
The stillness that cuts through thin air
And whistling leaves.
I’ll have survived another trip around the sun tomorrow,
But today makes me certain
I belong elsewhere in the year.

I’ll never stop telling you how amazing you are, even if we disagree on certain things you’ll always be my favourite person.
—  Tenari Ioapo // To the one I love

1. Hello.
2. I miss you.
3. Can we talk?
4. I hope I’m not annoying you.
5. I want to see you.
6. Please tell me you’re doing fine.
7. I’m worried about you.
8. Let’s listen to our favorite song.
9. Do not let other people bring you down.
10. I hope you’re truly happy.
11. I love you. I really do.

We started from 1 and I felt 11. Sometimes we do 8 with comforting silence. You used to remind me about 9. And I will always be grateful about everything we’ve had. Wherever you are, and whoever you’re with, please always remember 2, and 10.

—  ma.c.a // 4 but 7,3,5 and 6 : An Indirect Message From Me

Don’t fall in love with a woman who reads, a woman who feels too much, a woman who writes. 

Don’t fall in love with an educated, magical, delusional, crazy woman. Don’t fall in love with a woman who thinks, who knows what she knows and also knows how to fly; a woman sure of herself. 

Don’t fall in love with a woman who laughs or cries making love, knows how to turn her spirit into flesh; let alone that one who loves poetry (these are the most dangerous) or spends half an hour contemplating a painting and isn’t able to live without music. 

Don’t fall in love with a woman who is interested in politics and is rebellious and feels a huge horror from injustice. One who does not like to watch television at all. Or a woman who is beautiful no matter the features of her face or her body. 

Don’t fall in love with a woman who is intense, entertaining, lucid and irrelevant. Don’t wish to fall in love with a woman like that. Because when you fall in love with a woman like that, whether she stays with you or not, whether she loves you or not, from a woman like that, you never come back. 

—  Martha Riveria Garrido
Fifty years from now, if you knocked on my door and told me that you needed me, I would still drop everything I had to help you.

Fifty years from now, if you knocked on my door and told me you were ready to try again, I would be ready to try again.

Fifty years from now, if you knocked on my door and told me that you loved me, I would love you back.

I know that I will want you for the rest of my life, so I’m hoping that in fifty years from now when you knock on my door, it will only be because you misplaced the key.

—  I’ll want you forever. (via @sinfulessentials)
Darling age of 20, 
you are honey sweet
and dangerously tender.
You are not a kid anymore, 
you are bold enough to
wear high heels,
you are adventurous
enough to let God in
your heart.
And your past wakes up
at night and watches
you sleep and it forgives you.
You have good hands
and less friends.
You bathe in oils
and clean the house.
You are about to
get married
and you keep your phone
conversations long while
you keep
the towel wrapped around
your head.
Your poetry is not just poetry
but statements ,
marriage vows,
Darling age of 20,
you haven’t always
been modest,
you haven’t always been
thoughtful with him.
You are still a cage of tigers.
And when he loves
you good,
really good,
you are a mermaid
with beautiful long legs. 
You have an alluring 
voice and it consumes him. 
It makes him want to marry you.
You are not a scandal anymore
in this town, 
and you’d have
given all your ages,
all your youth to feel like you feel now.
Darling age of 20,
you are still exquisite 17,
and romantic 18,
and curious 19
but you are his 20 now.
You are a decade older.
You are a revolutionary era.
You are the queen
coming to
the throne. 
And if they
don’t adore you anymore,
you will close your empire on them. 
Dear darling of 20, 
you’ve never been more 
in love than you are now.
—  Dear Darling Age Of 20 by Royla Asghar 
It’s a tragically beautiful thing, don’t you think,
to have somebody to miss.
—  Excerpt from a book I’ll never write, 61
“Cross country”
And when there’s
no more tears
left to fall,
please raise
your head up high,
and remember
that we’re still staring
at the same wide sky,
You and I—
both hoping that
will be fine,
even if sometimes
our stars
to shine.
—  ma.c.a // Look up, when you’re feeling down
What are you supposed to do when you are falling in love with someone, and your whole body is being drained. What are you supposed to do when you feel yourself losing your sanity because you feel so empty by the end of the day. How are you supposed to explain how you feel to someone who feels no where close to how you feel about them. I’m loosing myself trying to love him. I’m losing my sanity, because I’m so caught up with him. I wait by my phone, waiting for another text, and it’s never quite fast enough. I feel like I care more, I feel like I want this more, and I feel like he doesn’t give a fuck what happens to us. I feel like i bother him constantly, I feel like I annoy him every time I overreact. I feel like he’s soon going to get sick of my uncertainty of myself. Eventually he’s going to forget the reasons why he ever fell for me in the first place. I’m waiting for this heart break to come, just like our over due earth quake.

Do you believe distance can work?“

“Absolutely, distance is a physical aspect and I believe falling in love with a soul is much more significant than a geographic location.

—  Tenari Ioapo Love > Distance
if i promise to make you spaghetti once a week for the rest of our lives, will you make sure i have coffee every morning? if you protect me from all the evil clowns in this world, i promise to hold you on the nights where it feels too hard to breathe. despite my fear of heights i will fall for you, as long as you promise to fall too.
—  4am
I love you,” he shouts at her.
“Well I don’t love you.” She fires back.
“Because if I loved you, then I would notice how you tap your foot when you’re nervous. And how you bite your lip when you’re concentrating. And how you always, always, put pepper on first, then salt. If I loved you I would know that you hate dancing, which makes sense because if I loved you I would know that you’re a terrible dancer. I would know that you can’t look in a mirror for too long because you have your fathers eyes, and those eyes remind you of him leaving. I would know that the reason you don’t drink isn’t just because you hate the taste of whiskey. I would know that the ocean was your safe haven, your escape. But I don’t love you.” she ends, her lips trembling. She stares into those green eyes of his, her breath shaking, the words she had just spoken finally hitting her.
“But maybe, maybe I do.
—  An Excerpt From a Book I’ll Never Write #13

Please do not
believe them
when they say
that you are weak,
just because
you are in tears.

Do not believe
them when
they say
you can’t,
just because
they never
saw you
secretly trying.

Please do not
let their words
sink deeper
inside your head
when all they mean
is to bring you
lower than them.

—  ma.c.a // Never let them dim your light
find love. find love like the one you dreamed of as a five year old which involves flowers and dates and promises. and for a minute just forget what happened in your last relationship. find love like the one that existed in the fairy tales books your father used to read out to you everyday before bed. find love you believe in. find love you want to write stories and poems about. find love you’d tell your daughter to chase. find love you would choose without having second thoughts. find love you just don’t just have to settle for. find love worth waiting for. find love.
—  f i n d. l o v e.//nikitagupta
I promise you this, I will do my absolute best to give you everything I possibly can because you deserve the best and nothing less.
—  Tenari Ioapo // I’ll love you right.