In early 2016, a pair of Brazilian bank robbers faced a conundrum. They needed to hide the waves of heat radiating from their impeccably tanned bodies long enough to fool the security systems and abscond with the entirety of Banco de Brasil’s valuables. The solution they came up with? The very same one Elmer Fudd would use: They covered themselves head-to-toe in aluminum foil.
Here’s the most amazing part: It worked! The foil successfully shielded the thieves’ presence from the bank’s heat sensors. But there was one tiny problem with the unorthodox scheme: No secure installation outside of a Mission: Impossible film uses only heat sensors.
Somehow the security guards watching this unfold live on camera managed to stop laughing long enough to phone the police, and the robbery was thwarted. Though if the thieves wanted to try the scheme again, it should stay fresh for the next week or so.
Because of the alcohol-snubbing Mormon church, Utah has a fairly adversarial relationship with booze. We say adversarial because the state hates the sale of alcohol, yet has a monopoly on the wholesaling/retailing of many kinds of alcohol. Their control of the supply also allows them to control how people are allowed to drink, which is why you can’t get alcohol anywhere after 1 a.m. And while you can get alcohol served to you in restaurants, you are not allowed to mix drinks in an area where you can be seen by anyone, which has led to the creation of the hilariously named “Zion Curtain.”
Essentially, any restaurant that serves alcohol has to make the drinks in a “separate space” from where the patrons are seated, because innocent Utah souls should be protected from witnessing the devilish rituals that make vodka bearable to drink. Thus, many places have a sort of separate area in the bar, surrounded by curtains or frosted glass or well-trained guard elephants, where bartenders mix their drinks. We’re not sure why the booze needs a privacy screen, but maybe slushing two drinks together is a bit too close to alcoholic premarital sex for Mormon tastes.
After what we assume was lots of campaigning and laughter from the citizens of Utah, the state finally passed a law this March to “remove” the Zion Curtain requirement, though what it really did was make the curtain one of three equally stupid options.