lol you know what everyone needs

hylianmaria  asked:

It all comes down to hiw much did The Children teach/make him capable of doing. I'm actually about to post something on him but i'm debating if I should wait. I've been wondering about this guy for a while like what does he even want? It is possible he went back to get chain. It is possible he carried the spears for other reasons. But even so, what made him decide he had to use them? How does he know there is something out there that needs to be dealt with like that? Damn GRRM and HBO Lol

You know, honestly I would have been just fine if the Walkers didn’t exist and the show was all political drama-it would stress me out a lot less…He certainly could be a greenseer; I think we know way too little about him yet and what he wants-hopefully the show will devote time to that in season 8. 

And everyone complains about how Dany’s dragons make her overpowered-if the Night King can see the future, how will they even deal with that? It seems like he’s basically invincible. And I’m not watching this show to see Jon and Dany get completely slaughtered, bittersweet ending aside. 

It’ll be interesting to see how this affects things. But also not because then I’m going to have to see dragons fight each other and I didn’t sign up for that.

realizing you’re on the ace spectrum like

“I’d hit that.” “You… you don’t even know them though??”

“Oh come on, everyone has a list of celebrities they’d totally have sex with if they had a chance.” “Haha yeah ok” *internally* what

"Ya so like for the past few years I’ve felt zero attraction to people I wasn’t friends with first?? Lol what’s up with that”

Why did you have to have sex with them?? Couldn’t you just hold it?? Like pee??

“You’ll meet someone who makes you feel like that someday, don’t worry” “……sounds fake but ok”

“Sex is an important part of a relationship! Everyone has sexual needs!” “….sounds fake but ok”

“Dude that girl is so hot” “I know right?? Look at her fucking eyeliner. Goals. The fuck.” “No I meant like… look at that ass” “Are we looking at the same person are you really focussing on her ass look at how visually appealing her outfit is and dont you dare fuckin tell me that eyeliner isnt fierce as hell

“Aesthetic attraction and sexual attraction are two different things” *puzzle pieces vERY RAPIDLY FALLING INTO PLACE*

*staring at the ceiling at two-thirty in the morning* i could die a virgin and i would regret absolutely nothing

“What’s your ideal girl like?” “Uh… my best friend?” “Oh cute, you want your girlfriend to be the one who knows you best!” “No I meant I am literally only attracted to my best friend she is my ideal girl please help I am dying”

“We’ve been dating for six months and we still haven’t had sex!!” “Have you marathoned Star Wars together yet?” “Yeah we did that like two weeks ago” “Well what more do you want

*thinking about an attractive woman* *dissecting my entire personality and sexuality to figure out why I’m attracted to her this time* is it the muscles. Oh my god is this a sex thing. Oh my god what the hell is this. Oh my god what the fuck is the wtf the fuck the fUCK

*Next day* Zarya could punch me in the face while eating me out and I’d let her but only because she’s a fictional character and therefore could literally never do that

*writing fanfic* ONLY CLOSE FRIENDS HAVE SEX BC ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ELSE MAKES SENSE TO ME

(why is that tho. maybe i should look into that *doesnt look into it*)

“What do you find most attractive in a girl?” “Gotta love those strong emotional bonds” “No I meant like what’s a turn-on for you?” “DID I McFUCKING STUTTER”

*staring at the ceiling at two-thirty in the morning again* sexual attraction should be added to the cryptid wikia

“Yeah sex sounds like a great stress reliever and a nice way to strengthen the bonds between you and your partner(s)” “Well there’s more to it than that…” *The Arctic Monkey’s Do I Wanna Know starts playing in my head* “Haha ok buddy”

"There’s more to being ace than just not being interested in having sex or not feeling sexual attraction. In fact there’s a whole spectrum. You may even feel sexual attraction sometimes but still be ace. You can also be gay and ace at the same time.” “…bro.” “Also it’s totally normal.” *sobbing* “…bro. Bro there are words for it there’s an entire list oh my god-”

“-finally.”

Voltron Marching Band AU

I keep seeing marching band aus out there but I don’t agree with them so I have to make my own. Here goes!

Shiro:
- dedicated tuba
- somehow first chair even though he’s convinced that the rest of his section is better than him???
- he’s very modest
- has lungs like a fucking blimp
- *plays thirty-two 4/4 measures at a super slow tempo*
- *still hasn’t taken a breath*
- hYDRATION
- always making sure the rookies are taking care of themselves
- “did you eat breakfast today??” “are you drinking water???” “don’t strain yourself too much, but remember to practice! :)”
- the band mom
- has the music memorized the day after he gets it and no one understands
- except pidge
- the only one who doesn’t break a sweat during band camp and the others are so concerned
- “shiro seriously are you dehydrated you’re supposed to sweat how are you not dead”
- shiro: *shrugs* *does the entire routine* *isn’t exhausted yet* *still hasn’t sweated*

Hunk:
- fourth chair saxophone
- would play bass guitar during concert season but he loves his saxophone
- can play alto, tenor, and bari, but alto is his favorite
- “it’s so small omg I love it so much”
- would die for anyone in his section
- has memorized every alternate fingering ever and is happy to share his knowledge
- he’s on the loading crew because he can carry a sousaphone in each hand and a bass drum on his back
- not very good at sight reading
- he has to hear the music before he can play it
- but he plays great by ear
- has never chipped a reed
- ever
- not even at band camp
- pidge is jealous
- just. sounds like an angel when he plays
- takes such good care of his sax by killing literally anyone who touches it
- “did you just dent my saxophone”
- terrified rookie: um I’m sorry omg don’t hurt me I don’t wanna die I’m so sorry I’ll do anything
- most of the younger kids are absolutely terrified of him and he’s okay with this

Keith:
(I’ve seen a lot of “trumpet keith” aus but honestly?????)
- keith is drum captain
- he plays snare and he fuckin kills it
- keith is not a good leader in most aspects of his life but when it comes to music he’s just so in tune to it and he knows exactly what everyone needs to do to make the music perfect
- one of those people who can tell whether a note is in tune just by hearing it and he hates it
- “pidge you’re out of tune”
- “I just came from the tuner I’m perfectly in tune!!”
- “okay but you’re not you’re a bit sharp actually”
- doesn’t know how to dynamic
- “okay keith that was great but you need to tone it down a bit. play a bit softer, your dynamic is piano”
- “lol what does softer mean”
- he just beats the drum as hard as he can all. the. time
- never officially came out to the band, coran found him and lance making out in one of the practice rooms and afterward lance wrote “keith is gay and dating the color guard master” on the white board
- everyone was confused because “why would he date allura if he’s gay”
- lance was very bitter

Lance:
- trombone during concert season
- but in marching band he kills with a flag
- so flexible omg
- “keith look what I can do with my leg”
- “please untie yourself you’re going to get stuck”
- (he has gotten stuck before)
- hips made of fucking. rubber or something idk how do they mOVE LIKE THAT
- he and keith are not allowed to be within sight of each other in shows because keith gets so distracted by lance’s Hips From God™
- gives the rookie guard members makeup tutorials
- has a large role in the costume designs for the year because in lance’s rookie year the outfits were clashy and not good and lance was horrified
- he vowed to fix this abomination
- has never dropped a flag. not once.
- he has, however, lost grip of his rifle several times and accidentally nailed someone in the head
- he is the reason all the rifles have grippers now

Pidge:
- second chair clarinet and super salty
- has a photographic memory so she memorizes music like that
- doesn’t understand bass clef and will never try
- “that’s an e”
- “no pidge this is bass. that’s a g”
- “that’s a fucking e fight me”
- absolutely despises first chair clarinet
- “he’s so cocky I hATE HIM SO MUCH”
- really good with rhythms?
- hunk doesn’t understand this
- “hunk all you do is count it. look”
- “can you just sing it for me i’m lost”
- drinks 2948592859$-484 gallons of water per day
- puts on so much sunscreen during band camp that she gets paler
- “pidge why don’t you lay off on the sunscreen and try to get a tan”
- “because, lance, not everyone wants to get fucking sKIN CANCER”
- when she burns she burns bad
- somehow still has a sock tan???
- “heh look pidge’s feet are DARKER than her legs. told you you were getting paler”
- her reeds never last more than two weeks
- they are always broken, usually because she refuses to buy a mouthpiece cap
- “pidge this is why you’re second chair”
- doesn’t do trills. ever. hates trills almost as much as she hates the first clarinet
- coran tried to get her to play bass clarinet in concert once
- her reaction was basically ???????
- “coran i’m three inches tall and have the muscle mass of a corn chip I can barely lift my regular clarinet”
- absolutely lives by the “if you see a word you don’t know look at the director” rule
- no knowledge of musical terms
- “accelerando??? lol what’s that”

Allura:
- baritone during concert season
- color guard captain
- the master of “spin a thousand times without getting dizzy”
- perfect balance
- has literally stood on three fingers and twirled a flag with her foot and could do it again
- very loud
- she will always be heard
- thinks the rookies are cute but she will not put up with their shit
- “lance stop giving everyone makeovers we’re supposed to be learning the routine”
- has made a flower crown for her flag
- so graceful
- has never fallen
- has dropped the thing she was twirling (flags, rifles, sabres, etc) exactly once and that was because she threw a sabre at lance’s head
- coran was not pleased but it was pretty funny
- can do your hair 101 ways but only one of them is acceptable because we all have to look the same, goddammit lance stop with the braid trains
- doesn’t take lance seriously at all and tbh he doesn’t blame her
- took dance classes as a kid and found that she enjoyed it
- but color guard is where she belongs
- (even if some of her fellow guard members *cough*lance*cough* are assholes sometimes)
- one time a toddler ran out onto the field during a show and hugged allura’s legs and she melted
- “coran can we keep it”
- “her parents are right there”
- “but can we keep it”
- pretends to be Mature and Serious but in reality she’s as much of a dork as the rest of the band
- once she heard a cheerleader say “i’m glad we don’t have to work with the band like the color guard” and she decked them
- has temper issues but is overall a great performer

Coran:
- the wacky director
- band camp stories take up half the class time
- if someone doesn’t want to play this part again, or is tired of marching this set, all they have to do say “hey coran did ___ ever happen at your band camp” and coran will never shut up again
- this is a risky move though because if he realizes what you’re doing you will never see the light of day again
- the living embodiment of “one more time” *ten times later* “one more time”
- “if you’re not perfect then we’re not competing”
- was humiliated once by a rival school because of an immature band
- will never let it happen again
- tries (and fails) to reference modern pop culture
- “i think you kids will like this song! it’s kind of like that one the kids sing now with the doors and the painting”
- “the what now”
- “you know, the one by those scared parties”
- he means well
- super chill but if you get on his bad side then you will see hell
- jokes around a lot but he is serious when it comes to music
- and if you’re not then coran will not hesitate in kicking you out
- “if you can’t play your instrument then you wON’T PLAY YOUR INSTRUMENT HOW’S THAT BYE FIND A NEW 5TH PERIOD TEACHER”
- a professional Student Roaster™

I wish I could write about fields of lilacs
Not the bodies
And I wish I could write about majestic sea-whales
Not their bodies
Filled with parcels of our food tablets

Let me make an overbold
Sure to be foolish in 20 years statement at 24

A poet’s job should be to write what must not be written
What burns your eyes when cast into the light
Because you’ve been waiting to hear this your whole life,

“Friend, I was walking down the street and heard the wind say this and thought I should let you know.

‘The earth is dying
And I am dying
And everyone needs you
To write about lavender instead.’"

—  “Lavender instead” by Ben Aaron
  • me: *slips joe nicolosi a $20*
  • me: psst, make grimmons canon...

anonymous asked:

could you do like a headcannon about the height difference between isak and even? like i imagine even would tease isak and be like "oh do you need help reaching that lol" or calling him his smol boyfriend and isak gets frustrated because like he's only a few inches shorter than even idk i miss them so much

im sorry this is so late! but ha yEs!!!! this is not really what you asked for but im just starting to get back into the writing headspace again! so this is just a quick and sweet lil slice of life xx

  • listen im a shortie at 5 feet and everyone i know makes fun of my height, i have no doubt that even would be a cheeky lil shit and do it to isak who’s only slightly shorter. now there’s heaps of situations where even would do this but here’s one.
  • firstly - even showering isak with compliments is #canon. so i imagine a time where they’re both lying in bed on their sides, loosely cuddling and even goes all, “you’re so soft, like your skin and your hair and your face.” and then proceeds to kiss each mentioned feature before he adds, “and so small you fit perfectly beside me.”
  • isak ofc is offended. “ME? small???? even im 6 feet fucking tall, im SLIGHTLY shorter than u?? im taller than everyone we know!”
  • “well.” even replies pensively. “compared to me. admit it.”
  • and isak just huffs and counters back with, “yeah, only because you’ve somehow got giraffe genes.”
  • and it was so random that even just blinks, taken aback, before throwing his head back and guffawing and isak’s lips are quirking up as he watches even lose himself to something that he doesn’t even think was that funny. so isak pushes playfully at even’s shoulder with a muttered and half-hearted, “shut up its true, you’re like, freakishly tall.”
  • things get a bit serious tho all of a sudden when even calms down and looks isak in the eyes, his own eyes soft before he states, “but you still love me anyway.”
  • he didn’t phrase it like a question but isak still heard the hint of one. for all the confidence even seems to have, isak’s been seeing quite a lot more of his insecurity lately and while it hurts isak to know that even feels this way sometimes, he’s glad that he believes in them enough and trusts isak enough, to share all the different parts of himself, the good and the bad, the fun and the sad. 
  • but isak rolls his eyes, tryna play Cool, be cool isak don’t randomly jump him and shout ALWAYS!!!!
  • so isak ducks his head down a lil and then looks up and locks eyes with even, cheeks warm, and he could say something ridiculously sappy like ‘always’ or ‘ yes’ or ‘of course! but he’s isak and this is even and they’re both still so new to this, the feelings that even will bring up in isak will always feel new even after months, that’s just the way it is between them.
  • isak decides to stay chill and say, “well, if i must.” with a long drawn out and obviously fake sigh and even’s eyes twinkle and isak knows that he Knows. isak doesn’t even have to say ‘always’ or something sappy like ‘forever’, bc even can see it in isak’s eyes, he can feel it in the way he kisses and moves around him, the way he touches him and looks at him, the way he talks and supports him. 
  • the way he just IS.
  • because he does love him and he isn’t afraid of even knowing.
public playlists --

bc I get asked at least once a week about music recs and such here are my public playlists on spotify (also making this so I can stick in in my navigation page properly—

season of the witch – exactly what it sounds like, witchy music for your witchy needs, it’s the one everyone really likes, maybe you will too, who knows. 

nostalgia – again, this is literally my childhood from really small through elementary school really? lots of different genres, undoubtedly my very favorite playlist.

emo life – flashback music from my emo trash phase (8th - 10th grade and then again in 12th lol)

celine – this is literally an entire playlist of celine dion (english and french) bc where i am she is basically royalty so. (don’t argue with me about this. she is.)

noel – you guessed it, fucking christmas music.

clean your house – also self explanatory, what i listen to when i clean or shower, really. a lot of sing along songs, music that i prefer loud and to be dancing with a mop to. this is a really… odd mix of music so be warned.

covers – again, lame. literally just covers of songs from people. 


this is all that i currently really have made public, I think? I will likely add more as time goes on but here you go for now?

so i don’t know why i have to explain this but: if your friend asks you if they’re doing something wrong FUCKING TELL THEM not everyone can take hints and if they don’t know how they’re hurting you they can’t change!!! call your friends out!! not telling your friends what they’re doing wrong is Fucked Up and harmful to both parties

HERE’S WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT JUNHYUNG

- seems chic and cold at first glance but is so far from that irl omg lmao

- witty and open-minded

- on the quieter side but still very well-spoken

- realistic and honest

- very respectful 

- shy af but is also rly sociable ??? (literally friends with/knows everyone)

- gets embarrassed hella easily and starts sweating rEALly quickly HELP HIM LOL

- when you see him fanning himself that’s when you know he’s been pushed past his limits of embarrassment

- IS UNINTENTIONALLY CUTE 25/7

- really awkward around people he’s unfamiliar with

- FRAGILE!! gets hurt easily 

- likes being complimented

- covers his mouth when he laughs and it’s really cute i’m so weak for this

- NOT a sports person and gets tired easily

- sees the good in people and gives genuine compliments

- very down to earth and humble

- a man of few words, but is always sincere

- incredibly hardworking

- cares about and appreciates the members A LOT

- SO NICE SO SOFT HEARTED

- but will also call out shit for good reason when he sees it stay in your lane :)

Hey, everyone! So I just hit 5k followers (where did you all come from!?) so I’m here with a follow forever.

First, I just wanna say thank you so much to everyone following me! You’re all angels for putting up with my stupid… Honestly, I don’t know how you put up with me and my constant crying over Sehun. So thank you, thank you, thank you. Your messages always make me smile and the tags you put on my posts/edits (that’s right, I look at what you tag my stuff with. Every single one.) always make even my worst days a little brighter! I love you all!

Second, like 90% of these are EXO blogs but there are some that I just started following for my new BTS and NCT blogs. So if you’re one of the BTS or NCT blogs I tagged and you’re wondering why a 100% EXO blog is following you, that’s why!

Thank you all for making my tumblr experience amazing. Even if I’ve never talked to you or I just started following you, know that I love your blog and you make me smile everyday! ❤

Everything is in alphabetical order because my OCD said it needed to be so it’s easier to find your name.  So without further ado (つ•̀ᴥ•́)つ*:・゚✧

Italics = mutuals (I may have missed marking some of my mutuals. Please forgive me, it’s the middle of the night right now. >.<)

Faves = bold (though everyone is my fave, honestly)


#

@143jikook | @1aeyong | @1tenny | @1wyf | @2-tae | @2ttae | @94-hun


A-E

@actorhun | @agutsd |  @allthekaisoo | @alphaksoo |  @angstelica | @angel-in-slow-motion |  @artificial-playboy | @at1stsoo | @awbaek | @babyjongin-png | @baekhny | @baekiya | @baekssquishytummy | @brbcrawlingtokorea | @byeolks | @capricorn-boys | @chanbaeksmiles | @chefbaek | @chocoberry-dream | @cowiw | @dazzlingkai| @dika-dika | @dyolulume | @exosmum | @exoswinterstory


F-J

@faeryixing | @gotjhope | @hit-here-johnten | @honeykadi | @hotpinksoo | @ilikechimchimnuggets | @ilovminseok@ilovepinkandkadi | @inarichi | @in-exo-stable | @influentyeol | @intokai | @itsjibby | @jikookdetails | @jikookiscanon |  @jikookkisses |  @jikook-love | @jikookme | @jiminspiration | @jikoooktrash | @jminies | @jognogandsoo | @jonginsbish | @jonginssoo | @jongsooyah | @johntenismyotp | @johnten-tenny-fan


K-O

@kadiseuldy | @kaizzzi |  @kaidoscopes |  @kaisooedly | @kaisoo-4-ever | @kaisoorise | @kaisteria |  @kaiternity |  @kamelodi | @kireinakai |  @kokokaisoobop |  @kookmint | @kookminworld0507 | @kyangsoups |  @kyungception  | @kyungni | @kyungso | @kyunseu | @kyungsootrash120 | @kyungsoss | @littlebyuns | @lovekadi | @loyalkaisoo | @luedeer | @lunahobi | @markhyuck  | @meokmool @mimibtsghost @minminyoongi |  @mym8812 | @neocums  | @ninis-chicken-soo | @ohsehunpai


P-T

@pawjohnny | @pjungkook | @plottwistisreal | @pohroro | @porkdo-bi | @puzzlepeace | @rose-byun | @sefuns | @sehleste  | @sehunas | @sehunicorne  | @sehun-ist | @sehunnified | @sehunoh | @sehurn | @shiningsehun |  @shookt2kookmin | @softseoks |  @softkadi | @soofection | @sookaihun | @squishy-do | @starsehun | @suavesehun | @sweaterpawsjimin | @taeiloves | @theriseofyoonseok | @tipahnoona |  @toomanyfeelsexogdi


U-Z

@unkaisoo | @un-touchableee | @v-dyo | @wakawaka33 | @wuace | @xiulays | @yoongesthetic | @yoongi-love | @yoonseok | @yutas-puta


Again, thank you to everyone following me and to everyone who brightens up my dash! Every single one of you deserves all the best in the world and I love you!  ♥ ❤  ♥ ❤  ♥ ❤ ♥ 

they had months to actually spend time together out of the public eye and without stupid media headlines. it was able to flourish without any scrutiny from anyone. which has been rare for taylor, the type of relationship that she needs tbh. now i’m sad in case she didn’t want it to get out just yet coz she was still enjoying the privacy

Shadowhunters fanfic: PDA

“Of course, I wouldn’t, I’m just saying that if he wandered into the city of bones by ACCIDENT, say if he was blind folded, it wouldn’t be such a bad thing." 

Izzy scoffed at Jace, rolling her eyes, as Alec ignored them, tapping at the holo-screen in front on him. 

"Simons not so bad, you just don’t like that he’s with Clary." 

Jace’s response died in his throat as Magnus walked into the room and slid his hands around Alec’s waist and pressed a kiss to his boyfriend’s cheek. 

"Hello Alexander." 

Alec smiled and held Magnus’ hands where they lay on his stomach, turning his head to kiss Magnus back. 

"Hey hon." 

When Alec turned back to the holo-screen he found Izzy and Jace’s smiling faces staring at him, their chins propped up on their hands as their elbows leant on the table. He made a face at them and went back to tapping the screen. 

"What are you two idiots staring at?" 

Izzy sighed happily. "You two are so cute." 

Jace was looking at Alec curiously, as if suspicious. "I’ve never heard you call anyone hon before.”

Izzy looked at Jace with furrowed brows, laughing at his happy expression. 

“I thought you hated mushy couple stuff.”

Jace scrunched his nose up in disgust.

“No, I just hate it when Simon and Clary do it because they’re disgusting. Magnus and Alec are cute. I’ve never heard you use any pet names before, I didn’t even know if you knew what they were.”

Alec frowned at what he deemed to be a stupid comment, although his eyes betrayed his humor. “You’ve never seen the birthmark on my ass either, doesn’t mean it’s not there." 

Magnus smirked. "It’s true, he has one; I’ve seen it." 

Alec turned to his boyfriend with wide eyes. "Magnus!" 

Jace made a face and dropped his hands as he stood and shook his head. "I think I have seen that. I thought it was just a nightmare." 

Magnus laughed at Alec’s indignant expression. "What? It’s not like they don’t know I’ve seen you naked." 

Alec blushed and eased the warlocks hands off him, straightening his shirt and trying to look more put together than his flustered self actually felt. 

"Yeah but they don’t need to hear it. We are supposed to be professional today; we have the meeting with the downworlders so we are just Head of the New York Institute and the High Warlock of Brooklyn today." 

Izzy raised her eyebrows approvingly. "Talk about a power couple." 

Magnus sighed and offered a hand to Alec. 

"Of course, love. It’s a pleasure to meet you Mr Lightwood. And might I say you’re looking especially handsome today. Your girlfriend is a lucky woman." 

Alec laughed and gave in to the flirting, leaning seductively against the table and smiling as he shook Magnus’ offered hand.

"Actually, I don’t have a girlfriend." 

Magnus raised an eyebrow and slid closer to the Nephilim. 

"Oh really?" 

Alec hummed in agreement and hooked a hand behind Magnus’ back and pulled him close, so that the tips of their noses were almost touching. 

"Yeah, but my boyfriend is really hot." 

Magnus laughed, the happy noise turning into a happy hum instead as Alec kissed him. 

"Awww, cute couple alert." 

Jace groaned as Simon and Clary walked in, holding hands, and pointed to them in contempt. 

"Do you have to hold hands ALL THE TIME." 

Clary made a face as she rolled her eyes, Simon giving a bigger reaction as he waved his hands around. 

"They’re allowed to make out and it’s fine but we can hold hands!" 

"No! Alec being happy makes me happy because of the Parabatai bond, you two just make me nauseous. Plus, they’re in love, they’re allowed to mushy.”

Simon tilted his head and furrowed his brows, as if thinking deeply about something. 

“Does that mean you’re in love with Magnus too? At least a little bit? Because of the bond?”

Jace shrugged, becoming a little more civil. “It’s Magnus, I’m pretty sure it’s impossible not to fall in love with him a little bit." 

Simon sighed longingly. "Yeah, like Raphael." 

"What? No." 

Everyone paused to look at the vampire. Isabelle smiled at him. 

"Simon, do you have a crush on Raphael?" 

The boy in question scoffed, looking embarrassed.

"Pfft no, of course not. I have a crush on my girlfriend.” He quickly pressed a kiss to Clary’s cheek as she laughed. 

“See?" 

Jace groaned again. "Yeah, whatever Sheldon." 

"You know my names Simon." 

"Really? I didn’t know that; probably because I don’t care.”

 (idk what this is lol i need more flirty malec in my life. This and all my fics are can be found online in the links below http://archiveofourown.org/works/11305680

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12546336/1/PDA

Not So ‘Quick and Bracing’

Description: Killian sees his fiance making breakfast, and soon they hunger for more, which eventually leads to the shower… (Canon/scene divergence from the pancake scene of 6.18). 

Rating: E (because, reasons…)

Word Count: ~2600 

Author’s Note: I know, know…Everyone and their mom is doing this, but @killythecowardlypirate ask me to “do the thing,” and so…here’s my version. It’s a “what if Snow didn’t interrupt” version. And yes, Chantal, syrup is included… I mean, what’s pancakes without syrup, amirte? lol This is unbetad, because I just needed to get it out, and it’s twice as long as I intended it to be. Smut, humor and feels: just what you come to expect from yours truly! Enjoy!!


Killian quietly wrapped his arms around his fiancé as she flipped another pancake onto an already towering stack. He nuzzled her ear, his trimmed facial hair tickling her exposed appendage. “Something smells delicious,”  he whispered.

Emma smiled from ear to ear, the heat from Killian’s body radiating from behind her. “It’s just from a box…”

He practically growled as he responded, “I wasn’t talking about the pancakes..”

Emma turned swiftly in his arms, taking no time to lock his lips with her own. He must have recently brush his teeth, because she could still taste spearmint along his tongue. Her hand travelled from his scruffy chin, to his slightly exposed chest (he was in the middle of dressing himself and didn’t finish before walking down to the kitchen). After exploring each other’s mouth for what seemed like an eternity, she broke the contact, looking into his cobalt blue eyes.

She must have been staring far too long, because Killian broke her concentration, asking, “What?”

“I’m just…happy. Still surprises me sometimes.”

He just smiled. “Aye, love. Me, too.” Killian then leaned down for another kiss, this one more gentle than the previous one. As he lifted his lips from hers, he ask, “So, should I look forward to this every morning? My loving wife, dressed in naught but her black silk robe, making me breakfast?”

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Lost Series - Part Three

Part One : https://lovelydestruction.tumblr.com/post/156506543150/lost-series-part-one

Part Two :https://lovelydestruction.tumblr.com/post/156644847940/lost-series-part-two

Pairing : Jerome x Fem. Reader

Originally posted by callmevaleska

Unrelated - But I really love that gif ^^ He looks so cute.


How long has it been? I honestly don’t know. I haven’t seen the sunlight in days. The last time I saw Jerome was the day that I kicked a guard in the nuts and broke the others nose. For doing that, they threw me in solitary. The room was small, with white padded walls. The doctors kept doping me up with something that made my bones feel like mush. I don’t know what it is, but they said it’s to ‘calm me down’. I couldn’t move, or even keep my eyes open.

I haven’t eaten for days because of this. Everyday at the same time they push a plate of food through a slot in the door. Sometimes, I manage to crawl over to it. Eat a few bites before it all comes back up. I feel disgusting. I just want to go home. But that’s the thing, there is no home. To be honest, anywhere would be better than here.

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Vader: [text] aaaaggggghhh im so bored
Obi-Wan: Shouldn’t you be talking to your master about this and not me?
Vader: GEEZ hes busy ok????????? being supreme overlord of the universe is a tough job 
Obi-Wan
: If you say so. 
Vader: whatev noones making u reply 2 me kenobi
Vader: what r u wearing?
Obi-Wan: Excuse me?
Vader: hey i said im bored… 😏 just curious 
Obi-Wan: No.
Vader: no what?? no ur not going to tell me, or no u dont have clothes on?? 😉 
Obi-Wan: We are not having this discussion. Absolutely not. 
Vader: its just a question obiwan omg!!!!! 
Vader: lol what r u even afraid of? the council??? bc i can pretty much guarantee u dont need to worry about like…any of those guys anymore lmaoooo
Obi-Wan: I should go meditate. It seems like you could benefit from doing the same. 
Vader: no wait obiwan
Vader: i could go first. ill tell u what im wearing if u want
Obi-Wan: Anakin. I KNOW what you’re wearing. Everyone in the GALAXY knows what you’re wearing. 

Every time I play the Dragon Age and the Elder Scrolls games.

I’m going to make an evil, asshole character this time!

Character: *picks all the diplomatic options*

*helps everyone in need*

*is smol cinnamon roll that can’t stand blood and violence*

*what is this ‘rudeness’ you speak of*

*turns into pile of mush around LI*

Or

Character: *sarcastic and vain*

*but also ditzy and friendly*

*still helps everyone*

*is just sarcastic about it*

*lol i don’t know what I’m doing, but I’m gonna do it anyway*

*turns into pile of mush around LI*

Worried // Negan

Originally posted by jdmfanfiction

For anon 

Request: I know this one may be a little weird, but what would happen if Negan saw the reader slip down the stairs. No major injuries just a few bruises.

Warning: N.E.G.A.N he is a warning himself lmao oh and clumsy reader I guess

A/N: I love Negan so much good bye anyway I’m so excited about the trailer and ya know I need to see my loves in the trailer (aka all the women lol but no Jadis uh) anyway can you believe i would almost question my sexuality for Jeffrey?


There was three things that everyone knew. You were Negan’s girlfriend, that he was truly in love with you and that you were very clumsy. Because of this, you often had bruises, nothing serious, you always hit your leg against a door and some things like these. Most of the time, it was literally nothing, but Negan was always worried that one day you would end up hurting yourself badly, so he tries as much as he can to be by your side to make sure that you don’t fell, don’t hit yourself against some things and stuff like this.

But when you woke up, Negan wasn’t in the room anymore, being the leader of such a big group, you guessed he was doing something important so you didn’t really mind. You got up and dressed yourself before heading where Negan should be. You walked down the stairs quickly but you missed a step and fell down. Thankfully you didn’t hurt yourself too bad, you knew you would have a few bruises, again. You took your time to get up but at the same time Negan came to the stairs. Seeing you getting up from the ground make him worried instantly, he hurried up to your side.

“ Are you okay Y/N? Is something hurting? Do you need to see the doc? ” asked Negan almost panicked

“ No I’m okay, you should be used to it by now Negan. I’m fine I’ll just have a few bruises for two or three days, nothing to worry about ”

“ Nothing to worry about? You kidding me right? You could have hurt yourself pretty bad love! ”

“ Yes I know. But it didn’t happen, I’m okay. ” You reassured Negan as much as you could

sry i frankly just don’t give a fuck about quoting rich kids anymore, I think what we should be doing is writing arguments about why they’re fucking wrong instead of givin them an audience. [yes i’m aware many of you have told me this already, I’m a late bloomer lol]

Ignore bigoted bullshit, send in, or tell me to reblog, shit you write debunking their trash. They don’t need attention, they don’t need audience, everyone already knows theyre fucked up except them, so writing why they’re fucked up is more beneficial than laughing at our misery. imo. [yall can cope however you need to tho]

I mean if yall wanna start blogs giving voice to bigots too in hopes of seeing people will agree with you that it’s fucked up go ahead, but let me tell you, so many fucking people thought we agreed with our quotes, or that our actual posts were mocking hating bigotry. Literal nazis thought we were on their side.

Irony is a difficult thing to work with, because ultimately many people can’t tell what one believes on first glance, it’s best to be very direct if you want to get a message across, that’s what i’ve learned over the years. 

Band Class
  • Today in Band Class!
  • *class starts*
  • Tuba: *dicking around*
  • French Horn: Tuba! *turns around* Trombone!
  • Trombone: *emptying spit into flute case* What?
  • Flute: AHHHHHHHH EWWWWW SPIT
  • Everyone except percussion: SHUT UP FLUTE
  • Percussion: Lol ikr
  • Tuba: AHHHHH I DROPPED IT
  • Everyone else: AHHHHHH TUBA DROPPED IT
  • Clarinet: Goddammit Tuba.
  • Euphonium: Tuba, you okay?
  • Oboe: NOOOOOO THE REED
  • Bassoon: Fuck *raises hand* BD, I don't know where my stand is.
  • Alto Sax: *ACTUALLY PRACTICING*
  • Bari Sax: Horn, do you know where my ligature is?
  • French Horn: Check Flute's case
  • Trumpet: *plays as loudly as possible*
  • Clarinet: *dies*
  • Bass Clarinet: TRUMPET STOP IT
  • Tenor Sax: Bass Clarinet, I need a reed.
  • Bass Clarinet: Fuck you
  • Band Director: Hey guys, let's play scales.
  • Trombone: BLAGDHBJESFDGHACBXCMFDSJKRUKHTL
  • Oboe: I NEED A NEW REED
  • Tuba: Are you alive, big guy? *whispers prayer* I swear, this is the last time I ever drop you--IT'S NOT DENTED WOOOHOO
  • Band Director: Hey guys, let's play scales!
  • Clarinet: Bad reed, bad reed, bad reed, ooh okay reed, bad reed, decent reed!
  • Saxophones: BD, none of us have our straps.
  • French Horn: *sigh* Check Trombone's case.
  • Band Director: HEY GUYS LET'S PLAY SCALES!
  • Brass Section minus Horn: *erupts into a rousing round of Humpty Dumpty*
  • Clarinet: *joins Brass*
  • Flute: Eww Brass. Ewww Clarinet.
  • Band Director: *transforms into fire-breathing dragon* EVERYONE PLAY CONCERT D-FLAT MAJOR SCALE NOW
  • Everyone: *plays scale*
  • Oboe: *sob* I broke my reed