lol yh

omg so i’m working with this thing to promote local writers, and yesterday we had a session with this sci-fi writer

and he was reading out excerpts from his latest novel and it was fantastic

the scene was from a random captain’s perspective whilst he’s having sex with the protagonist, and he was just describing her body, and how he feels like she gives his life meaning etc etc and i was just like meh, male gaze, boring 

but then as he continued through the passage, it does a complete 180, where the captain mentions trying to sit up to examine her body further, but she’s just pinning him down and then it turns out she’s just using him so she can escape and just kills him 

and thats it, the scene literally has him reminiscing his old lover, looking only at this woman’s sex appeal, and creating an idealisation of her without even paying real attention to who she is, and it is because of this, he doesn’t even notice her ear piece or gun, and it gets him killed 

he’s wiped from the story because he looked at the aspects of a woman he found appealing, instead of looking at her as a person. 

anyway so im real envious of people who have good relationships with their parents or any kind of communication at all like wow, unprecedented

anonymous asked:

Hey jan whats those 'dolls' things for?

I ‘ave no idea. They were already there when I joined the Maw so I dunno much ‘bout them. They feel weird. They feel like they were alive once.

[thanks for the ask !]

Dan posts a video called 'The Girlfriend Tag'

Dan: Hello Internet. So, yes, as you can’t tell by the title of this video, today I am going to be doing… The Girlfriend Tag.
Now I know this may come as a surprise to you, and I know that a lot of people won’t be overjoyed, but er, we’re happy so I hope you can be happy for us.
*looks off camera*
You can, err, you can come in now…

*Phil comes and sits next to him with the Queen mask on*

*they burst out laughing*

Dan: lol yh im dating Phil lol k bye

*danisnotonfire explosion*

*‘fyi i still like vagina’ flashes up on the screen*

Boyfriend!Vernon
  • this is gonna be really fun
  • like, since he doesn’t have much experience it’d be something new for the both of you
  • expect more playfulness rather than cheesy romance because i really cant imagine vernon getting all “you are the love of my life, honey-”
  • no no no its more like he keeps blushing after eVERY cute moment and youre laughing bc hes so akskdkdkd cuuuute….
  • “hey y/n….are you made of stars? bECAUSE YOURE OUT OF THIS WORLD-
  • pls teach him that pick up lines dont actually work ok? 
  • kisses are shy little things that has to be led on deeper by you
  • playing w his floppy woppy hair~ 
  • and his nickname for you is “babe” or “beautiful”, when he’s feeling brave lol but yh, he seems like a “babe” person
  • imagine you both are in car and jamming out to his songs like…. i imagine that vernon has a lit playlist yunno
  • “dance” battles that vernon ends up winning because he makes up this weird giraffe dance move that has you dying lmao
  • couple street wear outfits like yes schwaggg
  • tried to teach to you how to rap……..keyword: tried
  • “uh! yeah! i be stopping tRAFFIC because of mY CHAPSTICK-” yes vernon was dying too you’re as bad as joshua
  • seungkwan always fanboying when he sees vernon with you bc its hella cuuuute well actually all of svt really
  • vernon falling asleep on you a lot because he’s a sleepy child who likes warm things
  • at first, he lets you choose the date and you always pick out fun places bc you dont want to bore vernon
  • so it surprises you that when he gets to pick, its the park where its peaceful and quiet
  • isnt a sleaze (he blushes too much to be one lmao) so you’re not worried he’ll pull a move while you both stand on a bridge with the moon, watching the han river rush underneath 
  • when you both are alone and it’s nighttime, he lets all his thoughts run out and sometimes you get sad because his real thoughts are so deep and emotional, you didnt think anything really bothered him that much…
  • vernon really trusts you though so you listen as best as you can and try to give him advice
  • and that’s how vernon knew you were going to be worth everything (’:
  • ahhhhhh imagine meeting families after a while and like vernon gets so nervous to meet yours like he can feel his english deterioriating lol
  • had to ask seungkwan what he was supposed to wear lol
  • and you assure him that’s it’s gonna be fine and he’s like y-you’re right…..and what do you know? your fam loves him bc he’s so nice and helpful
  • and when it’s your turn, you try not to show your own nervousness bc then you’d be defying your statement xD but vernon can tell you are and he just holds your hand and squeezes it and goes “my family is gonna love you~" 
  • and yes, they do!!! esp his little sister (: super adorable and she always asks vernon if he’s bringing you over when she calls him
  • you both barely fight and if you two did, it was probably from jealousy or how vernon is too "chill”
  • but pls don’t let his chill personality fool you into thinking he doesn’t care. he does a LOT, he just never had experience so he’s pretty much lost
  • consults his hyungs and theyre like you better go get them chocolates or something- 
  • and he does….and hes so sorry and you immediately forgive him bc you can see that he is 
  • mm…..adventure couple as well!! ✈️
  • always scoping out new places to eat in korea or checking out abandoned wrecks 
  • but yall always end up lost!!!!!
  • like one time vernon really wanted to try the phrase “im taking the next train outta here!” and you two end up in some small korean town like v e RNON
  • dw you both end up laughing and just calling s.coups for help
  • also, you both made up this bucket list and now you both are going to visit all those places
  • you having to check if vernon packed all his impt belongings before going to the airport lol
  • and its so much fun and as you go around the world, youll realize that no matter where you two go and how much beautiful places and people you see…..they dont compare to vernon (lMAO THAT WAS SO CHEESY but cute)
  • and vernon realizes that too
  • in fact, the first “i love you” came six months after, when you both were exploring tokyo and holding hands and eating ice cream and vernon was just gazing at you as you were describing something you saw earlier
  • like….you seem more beautiful underneath with the bright city lights twinkling in your eyes and above your heads
  • and before he could stop himself, “y/n, i love you” just like that
  • ofc he blushed but you kissed him, smiled and told him you love him too
  • but on a lighter note, the type to get amazed at everything on the trip too hes so adorkable lol
  • i think itd be safe to say that you are going to be vernon’s first love
  • and that even if you two break apart, you’ll always be the one in vernon’s heart as his first, the one who taught him to be how he is in a relationship
  • pls protect vernon~ 
3

roderich doesn’t care

Insanely belated secret santa for gilbuttbeilschmidt, who writes super cute pruaus (and is tempted to give in to prumano…dudeee don’t give in to the dreeeam :))) ! You said you had a weakness for roderich comforting gilbert and…lol ok idk what this is and I’m so sorry it’s so late! I had so many shitty drafts of diff ideas…and this one was the only one that turned out semi-whatever. I hope it’s OK, and thanks so much for your patience!!!

(btw you can find muCH CUTER austria comforting prussia in her awesome fic Flowers and Sunshine! It’s one of my faves uwu)

The alphabet of sexism.

A is for American apparel. Which shows scantily dressed, photoshopped models; which sells padded bikinis for toddlers; which teaches girls as young as five that they are not good enough the way try are.

B is for bitch. The five letter slap to put women in their place; the degradation of women as to nothing more than dogs in heat; the word you use when I am opinionated; the word you use when I forget my place behind you.

C is for contraception. What women are denied all over the world before being forced to carry a baby because abortions aren’t legal either; what men expect women to carry; what so many young girls don’t have access to.

D is for degradation. When I see other women sexually objectified on magazines sold in broad daylight; when my strong opinion is nothing more than a symptom of PMS; when I do not have the same right as you because I was born in the lesser 50%.

E is for emaciation. Anorexia; bulimia; encouraged and romanticised by the culture we live in to the point where 1.6 million in the U.K. are affected by an eating disorder and 89% of them are women.

F is for female genital mutilation. The removal of the clitoris often without anaesthetic; the oppression and mutilation of young girls with no justification whatsoever; the human rights issue that Michael Gove (minister for education in the U.K.) wanted to refrain from teaching I schools.

G is for gender roles. Women are mothers, housewives, obedient cleaners and sexy secretaries, who will never amount to anything. Or at least that’s the image we are raised with. Women who will never reach the top of the career ladder because they’re told that it isn’t possible and shouldn’t they be in the kitchen?

H is for hate crimes. Hate crimes against women that go uncontested because it’s just a bit of fun. Hate crimes not taken seriously because the woman in question was dismissed and told she was simply over reacting.

I is for ignored. When my outcries against sexism are at this very moment being dismissed and forgotten by you lot, because I’m just one woman in 3.5 billion, working for a lost cause, right? I’m not wort the effort it takes to listen to me, right?

J is for joke. Just a bit of fun and why are you overreacting. J is for justification. J is used when a woman speaks out when she is felt up on the bus or sexually harassed in a club.

K is for killed. Women murdered before, during and after rape; women murdered because they want the same rights; women slaughtered because it’s their birth right to submit.

L is for lesbian. When women are treated worse than gay men, even within the confines of homosexuality. When women are over-sexualised for the entertainment of straight men. When porn is the thing that is most closely associated with you because of both your gender and sexuality. When I, a 15 year old girl, am told I should make videos with my girlfriend. Because apparently lesbians are either terrifying man haters, or only good for porn.

M is for men. Our oppressors who are, oddly enough, also oppressed by sexism and gender roles. When they have to be strong, emotionless and macho. When being called a girl is the worst insult because it inherently means weakness. When boys are raped and told that the should enjoy it, told that by other men.

N is for ‘nice guys.’ Nice guys who complain about the friend zone they are put in when a girl doesn’t want to have sex with them, because apparently that friendships is nothing more than a consolation prize.

O is for oppression. Be it everyday, or on a global scale. Women who’s ideas and bodies are beaten down and trampled upon because of our social position.

P is for periods. When our feelings and ideas and opinions are dismissed because of course it must just be down to hormones. When girls are shamed for carrying out natural bodily functions. When we have to pay for pads as tampons, but male condoms are free?

Q is for queer. Be you lesbian, trans* female, pansexual, bisexual, or asexual. Whatever you are, it seems that even within the already oppressed population of anyone who isn’t straight, those if a female disposition are more oppressed. And there’s not mic worse than being oppressed two times over. Once is enough. Once is too much.

R is for rape. I shouldn’t need to tell you all the rings that are wrong with rape. I really really shouldn’t.

But on second thoughts.

R is also for rewrite this alphabet.

S is for stop this alphabet.

T is for turn this alphabet around because I should not be able to come up with 26 elements of female oppression. I should not be able to list so many ways in which we are oppressed.

So like I said; rewrite this.

A now stands for action. B is for breaking social confines. C is confrontation, d is determination and e is ending sexism. F is for feminism.

Feminism is for equal rights. Feminism doesn’t mean women are better than men. Feminism is for everyone.

Create you own alphabet. You control you body. You control your life.

—  Sooffles