loki will probably press this button

Dun dun dun dun duuun dun

Darcy looked at the mess of her phone. How was she going to explain this one if anyone asked? Jane would likely throttle her, Thor would probably throw the offending hammer at her… She sighed and pressed a few of the buttons, trying in vain to get something playing, but the discharge from Mjölnir seemed to have fried the speakers as well.

“You could have at least left me with my music, you stupid piece of shrapnel,” she muttered.

Mjölnir hummed at her insult and Darcy jumped backwards in surprise.

“Mjölnir is not stupid, you know.”

Darcy squeaked and jumped again. “I’ve told you not to sneak up on me, Loki,” she said, turning around to face him.

“And I have warned you not to be so familiar with me,” he replied.

“I am _not_ calling you ‘my lord’,” she snapped back.

“No, I came here of my own volition,” Loki replied, purposefully misinterpreting her words. “What did you do?” He walked over and took the destroyed phone out of her hands. “In my experience, these devices do not normally look like this,” he said.

Darcy let him have it and smiled at his confusion. “Sure, it’s the latest trend in telephones…” She trailed off as he fixed her with a glare.

“Do not lie to me, Darcy,” he said.

“Now who’s too familiar?” she snapped. “It needed charging. Back on Earth, we have a thing called induction, that can charge batteries without plugging things in…”

She was cut off by a chuckle from Loki. “You attempted to charge your device from Mjölnir?” His amusement increased to an outright laugh. “The poor offended hammer of Thor. Reduced to a Midgardian plaything’s accessory.” Loki turned the phone over in his hands.

A disgruntled chime sounded from the vicinity of the hammer, sounding much like a mashed piano keyboard.

Darcy and Loki both frowned, looked at each other and then looked down at Mjölnir.

“Did it…?”

“Was that…?”

“Your phone device, it also contains music, does it not?”

“Well, yeah.” Darcy looked from the hammer, to the phone, to Loki. “You’re not implying that Mew-mew has learnt from my music library?”

“I am not implying it. I think that is quite obvious. That particular kind of sound is not of Asgard.”

Darcy laughed out loud. The hammer joined in pulling a rather delighted chord from somewhere out of Darcy’s music collection. “Oh this is too brilliant,” she said, wiping tears from her eyes.

“I do not think it is something to laugh at,” Loki said, though there was a slight smirk on his face.

“Why not? It means I can still listen to my music. I am sorry, Mew-mew, for insinuating that you are a useless piece of shrapnel. You are a beautiful, wonderful, intelligent,” she shook her head slightly at calling a hammer intelligent, “shiny piece of equipment.”

Mjölnir replayed the happy chime.

“Are they the only sounds you know?” Darcy asked.

The keyboard clash rang out again.

Darcy laughed. “You killed my phone, but you have a sense of humor. I think I can learn to like you, Mew-mew.”

“Perhaps you could even learn to pronounce Mjönir correctly,” Loki muttered.

“My mouth doesn’t like the syllables,” Darcy said. “So what songs did you learn? U can’t touch this?” Mjönir obliged by playing 'STOP. Hammer Time.’ and Darcy couldn’t stop herself from laughing. “Bet that’s your favourite, huh?” she asked. I’m talking to a hammer. I’m on another planet, standing next to the God of Mischief, and I’m talking to a sentient hammer, she thought.

Loki jumped back. “What was that?”

“A song of my people. Well, part of a song of my people.”

Loki frowned, but the frown slowly softened into a smile and then a grin. “Tell me, by any chance, do you have the piece of music that goes thus?” Loki hummed a few bars of a very familiar tune.

Darcy grinned. “I do.”

He shared a conspiratorial glance with Darcy. “Then let us convince Mjölnir to give my dear brother a, how do you call it?, theme tune.”


Thor was puzzled by the behavior of Mjölnir. Whenever he lifted it above his head, a wonderfully majestic tune played, but he could not for the life of him figure out how it happened, or how to stop it. It wasn’t that he disliked the tune, it was just very distracting in combat. When he related his story to his companions, Loki and Darcy shared a look and then broke out in conspiratorial laughter. It didn’t help that Mjölnir decided that it would be a perfect time to begin playing 'U can’t touch this’ from 'Stop. Hammer Time.’. They shared another look and ran, taking advantage of Thor examining his hammer with a very confused expression on his face to give themselves a headstart.

Admin Post - THF Holiday Hiatus

Dear TH enthusiasts, readers and writers and lurkers,

It’s that time of year again. We are putting the blog on hiatus until the New Year. We haven’t loaded the queue or anything fancy because we’re still drooling over the High Rise and I Saw the Light trailers and didn’t plan ahead. (Or because we’re not that smart, but we’re going to lay blame on Tom Hiddleston because we can. He’s responsible for the time that we’ve sunk into watching the Avengers for the 116th time - really, we counted!)

We’d love for you to take some time to be with your family until you can’t stand them anymore and you come running back to us for fiction. We’d love for you to enjoy the holiday so much that you’re desperate for some new stories. Drink tons of eggnog, sparkling fruit punch and champagne and get inspired by the pretty sparklies that appear before your eyes. We expect alcohol-induced celebrations with Laing and Loki in our box when we return. House points (<eheheheh) for both together! Someone put Loki in that crazy house! 

As for the admins and what we’ll be doing- we’ll be catching up on some maintenance around the blog - maybe an overhaul of the pages, maybe not. Probably tweaking this and that, pressing buttons and options we shouldn’t, generally making a mess of the place just to clean it up again. We get distracted by Adam and Magnus and all the pretty words in the archive, and then our plan goes with our intelligence, far, far away in the land of Asgard.

If you’re seeing this post, we’ve closed the inbox. We won’t queue anymore stories from the 23rd of December through the 3rd of January. We’ll make a post on the 3rd, so you’ll know that the inbox is open again. We’ll be back to posting the next day! Have some stories ready for us as we’ll have hungry eyes ready to devour anything you bring to us.

Happy holiday (insert that of your choosing here) and Merry New Year to you THF-ers. You’ve made this blog such an amazing success. We couldn’t have made it this far and/or/(both) this long without each and every one of you. New followers, intermittent followers, original followers, you’re all important to us. Here’s to another Hiddleston filled year, welcome 2016!











(from Thor / Avengers / Thor: The Dark World)








Includes Oakley from Unrelated, Bill from Suburban Shootout, John from Miss Austen Regrets, William from Crandford, Edward from Archipalego, F. Scott Fitzgerald from Midnight in Paris, Freddie from The Deep Blue Sea and The Great Escapo from Muppets Most Wanted


Includes Captain Nicholls from War Horse, Magnus Martinsson from Wallander, Prince Hal/King Henry V from The Hollow Crown, Adam from Only Lovers Left Alive, Caius Martius from Coriolanus, Thomas Sharpe from Crimson Peak and Jonathan Pine from The Night Manager