The way a sheet of glass cracks
Spiderweb tendrils
Snaking away from solitary space
Chase away the whites of my eye
Lean in close and suck the air from my lungs
Words play on repeat,
“I am, I am,
I was, I won’t”
Recluse sputtering recoils from wounds they told me were long since
Stitched and sealed, if I cry out don’t look
You’ll know my state by the sound and I’ll fall away from this
Abridged and freshly hollowed out.

Tectonic plates, grinding hard and slow
until something shifts, splits, cracks, gives.
A thousand splinters all wedged under my fingertips.
Dropped the mentos in the coke again.
A kaleidoscope of fragmented events distorted
by fog and time and all this black paint
I don’t remember spilling but those are my footptrints

walking into the uncreachable space beyond this volcano.
Tomorrow I’ll clean this mess but today
I am old wounds reopened to reveal
Someone I don’t recognize.

Shapes in the mirror all separate to choice parts, take your pick.
My eyes drilling holes down deep into nothing
You’ve hit oil, kid, and I am diving deep into the black lagoon,
Tar that drips down my throat and burns like oxygen deprivation.
Think of blank sheets of paper, think comfort objects
Clench every muscle, release and I am going, gone.
One word answers, put all attention to sensation, 
Pinpricks and blacked out canvases

And I press against myself, tongue pressing tight against my teeth Someone said, “pull it together” promise to be Seen and not heard.
—  Untitled 

the night sits crescent shy on her shoulders. cicadas awakening, after seventeen years of sleep. her skin feeling like dew. she, the skin that morning sloughed. the ambush of a sun rise, inevitable as feelings. the sky starts to bleed. 

tagged by josephkavinskyy! thanks :D

if you could live in any fictional universe which would you choose?

ummmmmmmmm i would live in a melina marchetta universe, specifically lumatere chronicles. tough times yes, but reckon i’d fit in well with the monts (10/10 would try to seduce lucian yess)

do you believe in soul mates?
i’m impartial to that idea

who is your least favourite fictional character?
umbridge. ew

what do you do when you can’t sleep?
i read myself to exhaustion

if you could wake up tomorrow and be fluent in 3 additional languages which would you choose?
arabic, spanish and….idk, greek.

do you sleep with your door open or closed?
closed. i feel insecure sleeping with the door open.

what are five things you want to do before you die?
see the world, take care of my parents, publish a book, run a marathon, have sex

favourite disney princess?
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh this is difficult
pocahontas? and belle too

do you believe in ghosts?

what was the last movie you watched?

ETA: tagging logodaedalist the same questions bc yep perfect questions indeed ;D 

logodaedalist omg thank you so much!!!!!!! you’re such a good poet and I really love all of your poems but this one in particular (I have an odd fascination with church/religion symbolism in poems) (also I’m apologizing for my face bc it’s very scarred and acne riddled but I guess you can’t see that in the video)

logodaedalist replied to your post: Still trying to figure out if I want to do…

yeah i have no clue what i’m doing about nano this year. what is easier for you to write in? i’d go with the easiest tbh, nano is hard enough

I’m thinking about writing in a mix of languages, as mik proposed. Actually the easiest solution for me, I guess. Since my ‘train of thoughts’, so to speak, have been unconsciously shifting in both french and english for at least two or three years now. I’m just doing nano for the fun and the hell of it so if I don’t make it, well, too bad but at least, I enjoyed myself and  if I do make it, all the better while I had fun. 'Don’t overthink it’ is what I’m trying to say, I guess! I mean, it’s supposed to be a fun experience and all that…
logodaedalist replied to your post: have any of my lady friends had this experience…

lol i think that happens on a smaller scale with me all the time, yeah.

haha, it’s like the conversational equivalent of “you have a stuffed frog? you must LOVE frogs! let me buy you a frog item for every gift-giving holiday!” until eventually you’re just sitting there surrounded by frog figurines and frog mugs and frog pillows and frog bottle openers like “…I just thought the stuffed frog was cute…”
logodaedalist replied to your post: logodaedalist replied to your post: seriously…

This was my first year doing Napowrimo but I’ve done Nano and Camp and Screnzy, and they’re all really challenging because life doesn’t stop for it but it’s a fun challenge & i think it makes us grow as writers to be able to work under that pressure

I did it freshman year when I was also going through a pretty hard time (although not nearly as bad as I am right now), and now I’m a senior and graduating next month and it just feels like a really nice way to round off my college experience and kind of come to terms with everything I’m dealing with. and man I love writing and writers and yeah this is just a really great thing. <3