lofty ideals

mercury aspects and learning

The planets that aspect mercury in your natal chart influence how you process and absorb information

The type of aspect determines whether a learning style makes life easier or harder for you. 

For example, a mercury-lilith trine means lilith’s influence helps you learn faster. A square between the two bodies indicates that, although intuition is how you learn best, it is hard to access, leaving you struggling until you clear the block.

Another example- mercury-pluto trine: your obsession yields epiphanies/results; mercury-pluto square: your obsessions are your detriment and often lead no where.

With time and development, any mercury aspect can pave the way to accessing and channeling your inner genius.

mercury conjunct sun: the conjunction is the only possible aspect between mercury and the sun. This might mean your ego plays a role in how you learn. You may easily retain information that specifically applies to you, and take pride in your intelligence. This position can indicate intellectual arrogance.

mercury aspect moon: You are an emotional/intuitive learner. You remember things that elicit an emotional response, or have sentimental value. You may be inconsistent in how you absorb information, communicating everything with ease one day and unable to form a coherent thought the next. Your mental energy comes and goes in cycles.

mercury aspect venus: You may be an auditory learner with some musical talent. You might retain information better if it’s in the form of a song. You learn better by taking notes in different colors, in a calm, beautiful environment. Venus brings ease, beauty, and effortless talent to everything it touches. making this an indicator of a sharp, blessed mind.

mercury aspect mars: You learn by doing. You learn through intense, obsessive, single-minded focus. If a subject excites you or rouses your passion, you will lose yourself in it until it bores you, or until you feel you’ve mastered it. You think, speak, and act impulsively- and might get in trouble for your words.

mercury aspect jupiter: You learn the big picture. You prefer lofty theories and ideals to details and hard facts. You like making generalizations and obscure connections between topics. Jupiter “expands” everything it touches, so this is another indicator of intelligence. Check out the very first post on this blog for the possible implications of mercury aspect (esp. conjunct) jupiter (link). Basically, you might be able to channel information from the universe, if developed.

mercury aspect saturn: You learn slowly. You process information thoroughly, and take time to respond or form conclusions. You might have insecurities about your intelligence, or feel like there’s something “blocking” your mind. You may become a faster learner in later years, and retain mental acuity well into old age.

mercury aspect uranus: You are an independent learner. You don’t like school or learning from teachers. You hate traditional methods. You learn what you feel like learning and come to your own conclusions. You may be prone to sudden epiphanies and flashes of genius. This is another indicator of intelligence. 

mercury aspect neptune: You are an intuitive learner. You like to “feel” the right answer, but can’t explain how you came up with it. You might have gotten in trouble for not showing your work. Like jupiter, neptune helps create a channel for spiritual/universal information. However, neptune either “dissolves” or “elevates” what it touches- making this position a possible blessing or curse.

mercury aspect pluto: You are an obsessive learner. You gain deeper insights into a small number of subjects by thinking about them over and over, for prolonged periods of time. You learn by asking hard questions and not stopping until you get answers. You are excellent at things that interest you, and completely apathetic to things you consider boring. Mercury-pluto people can see things with frightening clarity or be blinded by their emotions and paranoia. Like neptune, this can be extremely good or extremely bad.

mercury aspect lilith: You are wildly creative, unconventional, stubborn, and intuitive. You learn best by allowing your subconscious to guide you. Your mind has a mind of its own, presenting you with unusual, brilliant ideas, but preventing you from grasping numbers and hard concepts. Your difficulty with learning some things (along with supernatural mastery of others) could make you feel alienated from the world. You may have a gift for understanding the mystical/occult, at the expense of being unable to grasp solid, practical subjects.

Y'know… I know people are well meaning, but there is such an all-or-nothing dogmatism that is present in the Tumblr pet community that’s really hard to stomach. It reminds me of religious fundamentalists – you have a lofty ideal that in reality, few people can attain, but we’re going to condemn you for not reaching this holy ideal.

It would be nice if I had a situation where I could give my birds all of the things that are good for birds, but I can’t, so I give them the best I can. They have food, shelter, enrichment, companionship, and love. Even though they don’t have the freedom to fly that they would in the wild, they are also free from the fear of predation, most diseases, starvation, inclement weather, and so on. They are living a good life.

Heck, I can’t even give my own kids things that people who have more money than me say that they should have, like tutors, travel, culture exposure, etc. But I give them what I can in my means, which is a lot like what my birds get.

Yes, there are people who are truly neglecting and abusing their pets, but accusing people who love their pets and are taking care of them within their situation and means is not, imo, neglect or abuse. Accusing people you don’t know of being lazy, neglectful, or abusive because their standard of pet care is not as ‘perfect’ as your high ideal is shitty.

How to become a good student (again) 3: Yearn for friendship - not worship; not debasement

Hello, fellow ex-good student!

‘tis done! This beast just got longer and longer, so I decided to cut it down a bit for the sake of readability. But let me know if there’s something that was too vague - the nuance might have got lost in the editing process.

Alright, let’s get down to business (to defeat! The Huns!)! So, if you’re an ex-good student, I’m pretty sure that you know this static in your head, right? Whenever you really need to do something but you just can’t get up and do it, so you keep procrastinating even though you hate it and keep scrolling and scrolling or gaming and gaming and feel more and more guilty?

Well, it might not be the most immediate analogy, but for this post I want you to consider that what connects you and your subject of study is essentially a relationship and that this static is (among other things) an indicator of how screwed up your relationship is. Just like with real people, your relationships with subjects can either

  • prosper and bear fruit (me & Creative Writing)
  • become cold and distant (me & French)
  • or, worst of all, turn sour and actively harmful. (me & PE, back in school)

Now, nobody likes to hear that they’re relationship-ing wrong. And it is true that different approaches work for different people. But here are the counter-productive relationships that I’ve personally ended up in and I’m gonna show you how I got into and out of them, so you can try to do the same. Maybe it’ll help you lift that static from your head.

Side-Note: Always remember that, since your subjects are just that (subjects), and not real people, you are the only one who can actually mend these relationships and, conversely, you are the one who screwed them up in the first place (probably with good intentions, though).

So, we’ll take them in this order:

1) Overeager Debasement

2) Undereager Debasement

3) Worship

(Oh, and in case you wanna catch up:


Part 1

Part 2)

1) Overeager Debasement

What is it?

The desire to do everything, perfectly, at the same time, right now. Not to limit yourself to just one field of study, but to master them all, to reign supreme above knowledge, to keep your mind wide open to new possibilities, similarities and contradictions.
You overvalue your own capacities and undervalue the needs and difficulties of your subject.
(also refer to the first post for this)

How did you get here?

(read picture from right to left)

So. Many. Possible. Reasons.

  • it’s a cage. The idea of doing just one thing for the rest of your life scares you and you feel imprisoned at the thought of it
  • you know that you could be outstanding if you applied yourself
  • you know that you could be even more outstanding if you became accomplished in multiple fields
  • you want to find connections between fields nobody’s ever considered before
  • you feel like you’ve wasted your last few years and need to catch up to others
  • you’re afraid that you’re not good enough
  • you’re afraid of being ignorant
  • you’re arrogant

No matter the reason (I’ve gone through them all), people caught in this state of mind shovel more and more onto their plate.
And then wonder why they can’t swallow it all.

What do you think you’re doing?

A labour of love, most likely. You think you love languages and sciences and athletics and programming and cooking and hanging out with friends and being alone and so you just want to do it all!
You don’t want to limit yourself! You don’t want to lose any time! But there’s just so much and you have so little energy and ugh, if only I wasn’t destined for greatness, then I could relax like other little people, but no, I need to keep pushing! In every! Direction! At the same! Time!

I know your delusion. I’ve been there. You imagine yourself to be that one perfect friend who gets up at 6am, watches the sun rise, does yoga, eats a healthy breakfast, goes for a quick run, comes back home, answers all correspondence, is artistic for a few hours, then scientific for a few hours, then social for a few hours and ends the day with tiny masterpieces in each area, goes out with friends or family to grab a healthy dinner and goes to sleep, happy and balanced :)

Well, you know what, my starry-eyed friend?

What are you actually doing?

You’re the mental equivalent of a social butterfly.
You’re being fucking disrespectful.

You’re always on the run and never able to really commit to anything, because you’ve already scheduled something else afterwards. You’re shallow, deluded, that one friend that always comes in running, screaming “Besties  ~ ♥” and everyone shifts uncomfortably in their seats and smiles a painful smile and humours you, because they know you mean well, but they also know that you know nothing about them. 
You’ve never been there for them ever, but always expect them to be there for you. Whenever they want to talk about themselves, you nod and then proceed to about yourself and your plans and “ohmygosh, this is so nice, we need to meet more often ~ ♥ “. But at least you mean well, so they’ve agreed to keep it simple and on the “The weather is nice today”-level with you. 

But here you are, wondering why you’re not making any progress.

So what do I do?

Well, you need to go from this:

To this:

How? More on that below.

2) Undereager Debasement

What is it?

This stage is what happens when you notice that your lofty ideals from Overeager Debasement cannot be fulfilled. You turn bitter, hateful, cold. You think you’re a failure, you think you were too soft. Instead of wanting to be friends with everyone, you now want to rule over everyone, fuck what they want.

You’re burnt out. You’re done. You just want to get through these stupid classes and catch a goddamn break, goddamnit.

And you WILL get through. You’re too proud to do anything else. But you don’t really care about any of it.
You just want to make it.

How did you get here?

If you were a good student, you probably heard at some point or another that you were “different” and that your complex and mysterious ways were not understandable and definitely not achievable for your average classmate.

Most people who tell you this mean well. A few want to make fun of you, but most actually do mean it as a compliment. But they don’t know how dangerous it is to hear it again and again, because regardless of whether it’s true or not, you start to believe it.
You start to believe that somehow, you have a higher calling, a higher standard. And you start to long for that day when your high standards will be met - when you will go to that one mysterious class where everyone is just as eager as you are, where the “Oh, captain, my captain!”-teacher will spark a fire in your brain that will never go out and when your ominous “gifts” can finally be put to good use for the prosperous future of mankind.

And you work.

And work.

And the class never comes.

You feel the weight on your shoulders when teachers talk of “high expectations”, you feel it crush you a little bit every time your friends tease you about your genuine fear that you might not get an A, that you might lose it all, that your “gifts” could disappear and you’ll be stranded and useless and you put in the hours, you work your ass off to keep that high standard, all in the hope of having that one miraculous class that never comes.

I realized that that class would never come when I entered university.

University, I’d told myself, would be my Arcadia, my Eden, my academic paradise where all my hard work would be rewarded!
Instead, I only found more drudgery, more incompetent professors, more disinterested students and even more bureacracy. To say that I was “disappointed” would be putting it very lightly.

I became disoriented and disenchanted. I realized that I could get through most classes with half-assed effort, I was hardly ever challenged, I floated along and hated every second of it. I blamed my boring teachers, the imperfect system, the teachers who had given me hope only for me to watch it crash and go up in flames.

What do you think you’re doing?

Being badass, cool and detached, most likely.

You dream of yourself as a master and your subjects as slaves. They bow to your will, they dance to your tune, you command them with the snap of a finger.

“Look, you slave of the system”, you say, lying on a velvet sofa, “Look, at how it hardly takes any effort for me to pass these classes! Look at how I spend my time doing things I actually like and that are actually worth it, unlike these stupidly easy classes taught by stupidly incompetent professors in a stupidly screwed-up system! Look at me, being edgy and drowning in self-hatred because I can physically feel myself gliding off the rails that made me so “special” and becoming one of the average people in the masses, haha. Ha. Ha. Screw academia, but still give me good grades, amirite?”

I know your delusion. I’ve been there. You imagine yourself to be that one perfect friend that never studies for classes, comes for three lectures per semester and still manages to get perfect grades because everything you do in school is, like, so five years ago. That one friend who has read all the classics in their spare time, has conquered and enslaved all the knowledge actually worth knowing, will quote obscure Polish philosophers you’ve never heard of and plays the piano with a perfect pitch. They’re the wisest, most culture-non-conforming people you know - they’ve been up until 5am, wandering the streets and drinking vodka from a bottle while forcefully pentrating the mysteries of the universe all by themselves until they finally fall asleep on a park bench and awake with an epiphany about Klein bottles.
They’re “special”.

What are you actually doing?

Caring more about appearing “special” than actually trying to be “special”, that’s what you’re doing.

But, look, what made you so “special” and “different” in the first place was not a “calling” or “gifts” or the fact that you wrote good grades and were destined for greatness.

Here’s a handy chart I’ll use later - you were lucky enough to fall into the green zone, lucky enough to be born with an innate respect and a love for learning. That’s what made you “special”. That’s what made you succeed. Not pressure, not warped ideals and certainly not the fear of failure.

But somewhere along the way you forgot that and only focussed on the results. You started to believe yourself to be so special that everybody else should cater to you.
The fancy titles, the awe-struck looks, the “You’re so amazing”s and the “The genius of a decade”, the planned Nobel prize speech and the prestige, the dream others had lovingly created for you and you had slowly absorbed and warped as your own? It got to you. Hell, it got to me.
And it became more important than learning itself.
Somewhere along the way, you and I, we became an arrogant and lazy assholes.

You looked down on your easy courses and homework and instead of recognising how lucky you are, doing it in a minute and a half and then putting in the extra work on top to dig deeper and to maybe contribute something of value and fun, you threw it aside with a snide remark as beneath you.
Of course it wasn’t fun. Of course it wasn’t challenging. You never even tried to make it either.

(And don’t get me wrong: I honestly do think that the education system as it is right now needs MAJOR reforms. But right now? It is what it is. And instead of making the best of it and doing what you once loved so much, you succumbed to societal pressures you found yourself unable to fulfill and said “meh”.
You cared so much about the fame and the title that the relationship itself didn’t matter.)

But this isn’t the master-slave relationship you imagine it to be.
It’s a trophy-friendship. Once upon a time, you got on really well with this person and other people loved your friendship. You fell in love with the ideal, with their connections, their money, their prestige, their name on a CV, and you stuck around just for that.
You valiantly ignore the reality of the state of things between you two
and take them out only when absolutely needed, only when things are this close to falling apart and so you keep walking a fine, fine line.
Whenever a deadline approaches, you shower them with attention and love and, gingerly, they open up to you and you see a depth and complexity to them that astounds you and makes you think “Imagine! Imagine how much more I could have seen if only I’d started earlier?”
But the moment the crisis has passed, you toss them aside once again.

Because this is enough to make your name.
You may not remember much about these nights or about the person at all, but the only thing that counts is that it will fulfill your “special” prophecy and make you a legend, right?

Well, always remember this:
(read picture from right to left)

You’re not “special” if you made it to university. You’re not “special” if you’ve made your name. 
It comes down to a simple choice: do you value appearances over integrity or the other way round? Do you dare to look like a fumbling idiot again when you start something new? Is the “appearing like an idiot”-part more important to you than the “learning/creating something new”-part? 
Have a think about it.

3) Worship

“Alright”, you’ll say, “Alright. I get it. So I’ll treat my “friends”/subjects with respect and integrity and I’ll take all the time and concentration I can bestow upon them, just as I would upon real friends. But do you want me to be like, uh - like…

What is it?

“…like one of those anime characters that lives only for their dream and gets up at like 6am, does the thing, talks about the thing, breathes the thing, goes to bed, dreams of the thing and then wakes up at 6am to do the thing?”

(Google: Did you mean Hinata Shouyou?

Yes, yes, I did, google.)

Well, no, I don’t want you to do that. See, that’s the other extreme and unless you’re an anime character, chances are that it won’t work out for you. 

How did you get here?

Personally, I was caught in this trap for a loooooong time. Anime offered me a new way of relating to my passions that neither my family nor my school had ever shown me: unabashed obsession.
I wanted to be perfect. I wanted to be obsessed. I wanted to give myself up to a higher ideal, something above human consciousness, something that would endure. I wanted to, well, get up at 6am, do the thing, talk about the thing, breathe the thing and so on - “the thing” in question being, of course, studying. I made elaborate plans, complicated lists, study-plans that shift on a daily basis and cover all grounds, I wanted to study for two hours before school, wanted to repeat lessons, wanted to give myself up to knowledge, made cool covers for my notebooks, made mock exams for my friends to use, planned to focus on each continent for a month and study it, planned to listen to one new composer each day, planned to go to the museum every week, planned to analyze Sherlock Holmes and think just like him, planned to - you get the idea.

I wanted to be like this:

What do you think you’re doing?

Being but a humble servant to the eternal workings of truth. Knowing thou art unworthy, yet suffering the perfection of study.

I wanted to go from 0 to 100, I wanted knowledge and wisdom to transform and deliver me, I wanted to feel enlightened, I wanted to feel my brain burning, pushing frontiers and breaking through to new horizons, I wanted to elevate myself to touch even the lowest levels of truth.
I wanted to do something noble, something worthwhile, something that could never be critisized and would always be valued, something with eternal meaning that would echo through the ages and I wanted to be even the tiniest cog in the machinery of mind.

What are you actually doing?

Being, quite simply, an idiot.

This is one of my favourite quotes (David Wong):

“There are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.” 

The same goes for studying. As shown above, studying won’t work out if you do not treat your subjects with respect. Conversely, studying also won’t work if you continue to idolize it as work beyond all work and reproach, as the only true calling, as the realm of the genii and by self-flagellating yourself and repeating “I’m but a humble servant in your kingdom of reason and will never reach where you are, but will spend all my time trying to reach you.” 

Why? Because by saying “I’ll never reach you or be worthy of you”, you’ve already sealed your fate. Some students (no matter how well they actually perform) are stuck thinking that they are stupid and incapable of doing well. Others think that the trick is in the preparation and they undergo complicated rituals of finding exactly the right study spot, exactly the right study drink, exactly the right study time, etc. in the hope of channeling the connection between their godly subject and themselves, but it never turns out quite as glamorous as they’d hoped (once again, speaking from experience).

This is because you cannot force a true friendship if you think yourself unworthy of it. It will always be worship. 

And why are you worshipping?
Because it takes the pressure right off of you
. This always annoyed me about some of my fellow students. They treated becoming a good student as this miraculous and unlikely event that only happens to the #blessed.
I insisted that “no”, it could be done. “Yes”, it was hard work, but ultimately absolutely doable. But now that I’ve been in their shoes? I understand.
Admitting that you could have done it anytime implies failure on your part for not having done it. By saying “Oh no, it is so very complex and divine and a lowly worm like me could never hope to crawl in its shadows”, you shift the focus away from yourself and onto the thing itself. 

But this is a synthetic, manufactured relationship with a partner that does not even exist. It is, at its heart, a kyaa  ~ I hope senpai notices me! (๑♡⌓♡๑) - kind of relationship. It’s idolizing not a person’s true character, but their appearance, their aesthetic and the values that they represent for you. It’s not really listening to what they’re saying, but warping their words so they fit into your perfect idea of them.
Just, unlike with undereage debasement, you do not play pretend that everything’s fine and secretly hate the other person deep down - you honestly idolize them to heaven and back, so you could never possible reach them.
You’re using them to fill in the holes in your own personality.

And that … just isn’t fun? I dunno about you, but treating studying as something that must be done perfectly with exactly the right pen and the perfect face-mask after the right smoothie and in the right lighting by a window overgrown with ivy and with perfect concentration from the first moment and unwavering, knightly passion and exact planning from 6am to bedtime all because I know deep down that I will not be able to fulfill these ideals and thus don’t have to feel bad about not reaching them just … isn’t for me. I don’t like my relationships to be all overstructured and “perfect” and high maintenance like that.

I want my friendships and my studying to be authentic. And that means that sometimes it’s messy and sometimes it’s hard and sometimes it’s quoting Keats while lying on the floor at 2am in the morning and chugging milk out of a carton, but it’s real.
I truly do understand this longing to make studying look pretty and like a magical realm, because when you’re in the flow that’s really what it feels like. But the beauty comes along with the practice, not the other way round.

No, but honestly - what do I DO then?

Y’remember Hippogriffs from Harry Potter? That’s how I imagine my subjects. Approach them carefully, honestly, maintaining eye contact and as equals and they will respect you. This scene:

This scene is what I’m talking about. 
If you were in a worship-state, you would only admire them from afar, gushing over how beautiful they are, but sad that they would never deign to even look in your general direction. (think of all the subjects you thought would be way too difficult for you)
If you were in a debasement-state, you’d either try to make friends with all the hippogriffs, hopping from one to the other and forming no bond with either or you’d “tsk” disdainfully and try to force them to obey you against their will. (*cough* Malfoy *cough*)

If, however, you’re in the green, there will be mutual respect between you and you will be able to fly.

So what does it mean to be in the green? 
It means not to do any of the above, obviously, so 

  • take your time for and invest brainpower into each and every one of your subjects - be a good friend. Be there. Listen. Even if they have crazy ideas at 4am in the morning. 
  • appreciate your subjects and know that they are more than the teacher who tries to get you to know them. Sometimes, some people just have a really shitty PR department (especially maths)
  • don’t think too much or too little of yourself. You can do amazing things, but that does not give you the license not to do amazing things anymore, rest on your laurels and expect others to applaud you for it. 

  • some relationships take longer than others to build, but getting to understand someone who puzzled you from the first moment and challenged your beliefs will improve your own personality as well
    (side-eye at PE. Yes, I love you now, you crazy athletic bastard)
  • do it for the sake of the relationship itself, because you enjoy their company. Results are presents which, although very much appreciated, should not be the main motivator to keep you going.
    This essentially means that you should think of studying as hanging out with a friend - already makes it seem so much more inviting and way less daunting, does it not?

    (Logic and I, being saltmates. Real friends judge other people together)
  • be aware that all friendships go through rocky patches and some subjects might take a while to warm up to you or you to them. But if you think that it’s worth it, then you gotta power through that. If you don’t think it’s worth it, you gotta be brave enough to say good-bye. 

Look, what I’m actually saying is … be Souma Yukihira from Food Wars.

Food Wars is a crazy and at times pretty pervy manga/anime, but I’ll be damned if it isn’t also one of the best pieces of fiction I’ve ever consumed and if Souma isn’t one of the most admirable main characters I’ve ever encountered.  

The relationship between him and cooking is filled with trust, love and equality. He trusts his cooking skills, because he knows that they have spent a long time together - cooking won’t let him down and he won’t ever let cooking down by stopping to look for ways to improve.

That doesn’t mean, however, that he’s always deadly serious - he loves to play around with cooking and to try ridiculous new things. He never forgets the joy that even the simplest form of cooking brings him. 

There’s one great episode where he puts his life as a chef on the line and someone fearfully asks him what he’d do if he lost. He shrugs and says he could become a lawyer or a teacher or something. So while he loves cooking profoundly, he does not worship it and he knows that there are other relationships he could build up if he had to. He just …doesn’t want to, because cooking is his bff. 

He loves to take on challenges to see how far he and cooking have come -

- and he takes challenges very seriously -

- but takes it even more seriously if he loses -

- and nonetheless knows that they are stronger for the challenges they have faced together. 

So, yes, this is what it means to be in the green. Cherish your friendships, hang out together, be honest, funny, clever, curious and you. 

You’ll be surprised at how much fun the two of you will have, now that all the pretensions and pressures are gone. 

Just …hang out and have fun.

(and maybe watch Food Wars!, because damn, Souma is the MVP of my inspirational heroes)

Have a great day and I’ll see you in the next (and hopefully shorter) part 4 :)

Rachel Amber

is exactly how I thought she would be.

LiS built her up to be this goddess, a “muse,” the life-of-the-party that everyone loved. People wanted to be her and be with her. You never see her in person, but people have tons of photos and drawings and stories that make her out to be some sort of Greek diety, like she was so larger-than-life that it was hard to believe she ever existed. Over the course of the game, Max finds the cracks in that facade and finds Rachel to be a bit of a pushover and a liar, but those who were closest to her never stop adoring her (specifically Chloe and Frank).

We finally see her in all her glory, the height of her popularity and from the perspective of someone who loved her unconditionally. From her voice to her aesthetic, her attitude and her hobbies, she’s exactly how I envisioned her.

She’s a cocky teenager with lofty ideals. She speaks her mind and isn’t about to let someone walk over her. Her actions show that she puts on a good show, looking the part of a total badass in public, but is selfish and direct in private, thought the transition doesn’t feel unnatural, like it was always there. She’s a fire that needs to be stoked or it’ll go out.

Chloe in LiS is very much like Rachel in BtS. Now, we see where she got it from.


Persona 5 Localization Error: 10/28 Cafe Scene

Short post this time, but, there’s a pretty blatant error in this scene that messes up some foreshadowing. The English dialogue is as follows:

“Because of sickening human beings…

Yes. My contempt for such people drives my sense of justice.

It isn’t for some grand reason like society’s sake or some lofty ideal.

It’s simply an absurd grudge. And extremely personal.”

And a rough translation of the Japanese dialogue, done by @redwhiteandgold

“The very worst adult.

Yes. My spirit to rebel against him is the very root of my own justice.

It’s not for society, or for idealism’s sake. The reason’s nothing lofty like that.

It’s extremely personal… just a worthless sense of resentment” *

The problem here is that he was talking about a singular person, which you later find out to be Shido. It was a big clue at his actual motivations, and the English dialogue almost loses that foreshadowing to the point where it could be misinterpreted as him talking about the crimes Shido was making him commit rather than Shido himself.

* Is also the same word used here:

“Hate” should’ve been translated as “resentment” here. Since it was talking about what Loki represents, there was a bit of foreshadowing missed here.

A friend of mine is talking about trans veterans at a national anthropology conference.

He asked me to write a statement in response to the result of the 2016 election. This is it:

An open letter:

De Oppresso Liber.  To free the oppressed.  Nous Defions.  We defy.  Liberty and justice for all.  My country has long claimed to be THE symbol of freedom and democracy across the globe. We have always espoused these lofty ideals.

And yet.  

Here we are.  

I was never a patriotic “true believer” but gods I thought we were better than this.  In spite of losing the popular vote our electoral system is poised to emplace a man who campaigned on the promise to restrict the human rights, civil liberties, and bodily autonomy of black people, Muslims, immigrants, and queer people of all stripes.  We have elected a man who is staffing his cabinet with openly white nationalist figures like Stephen Bannon.

David Duke, the KKK, and the actual American Nazi Party are holding victory parades and celebrations for our new president elect.

I want to say I don’t recognize my country.  But I do.  The thing is, when I was a child I did believe that we were the good guys.  We were the greatest country in the world—freedom was what made us different from every nation across the globe.  Then again, in those days I was a male-assigned child who went to church 5 times a week and only ever got into trouble for bringing my bible to school and preaching to my classmates.  To say I was naïve is an understatement.  The scales fell from my eyes very quickly.  

When one of the faithful raped me for 5 of my first 10 years of life, it was somehow MY shame to bear rather than his.  My father convinced me not to press charges because once people knew I had been raped, he said, I could never take that back.  

I learned that words and actions rarely aligned.  The church sign always said “All are welcome” but the church bylaws, which were updated in the 1990’s by the way, still forbid members of the church from even being party to interracial weddings.  My dad “didn’t approve of black people” as if they somehow chose their race and threatened to disown me if I ever brought home a black girl.  My family fears that gays will “convert” good little Christian children.  

My country kills unarmed black children but takes white mass murderers into custody and buys them cheeseburgers.  In my country a man with a gun can harass, stalk, and kill a child and claim he feared for his life, but a black trans woman who accidentally kills her meth-addled neo-nazi attacker with a pair of scissors from her fashion design class will go to prison.

No, I absolutely recognize my country.  All straight cisgender white Christian men are created equal.  The rest of us are to be dominated, subjugated, incarcerated, or deported.  Or otherwise “protected” from choice and bodily autonomy.  The toxicity of whiteness and Christianity and masculinity is a swift current that swept me into the teeth of a war I never believed in.  I did terrible things for a nation that refuses to acknowledge my basic humanity, and I will never be able to wash that blood off my hands.  In special forces our motto was De Oppresso Liber—most often paraphrased as “to free the oppressed”.  Our direct action teams appropriated the motto Nous Defions—We Defy—from the French resistance in World War II.  To me they are more than just buzzwords. I took them to heart.  I recognize that America is an oppressor to people of color, women, queers, and the disabled.  My transgender status and my womanhood do not negate my status as a warrior, and I recognize president-elect Trump and those who back him as the same dark forces my grandfather battled in the 1940’s.  I recognize my country for what it is—an empire built by slaves on the bones of natives—but I still believe in what it could be.  I know what side of history I will be on.  My America is diverse, without the divisions encouraged by those who would put so-called state’s rights before human rights or federal protections for them.  My America has skin that is red and black and brown, not just white.  My America is queer and fat and femme.  My America is Atheist and Jewish and Muslim.  My people are disabled and incarcerated and undergoing “reparative therapy”.  I still believe in one nation, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.  For ALL.  And I say to Trump and Pence and Bannon:  We defy you.  WE DEFY.  Nous Defions.  

Alana McLaughlin, former staff sergeant, United States Army

De Oppresso Liber.

hubert-the-mouse  asked:

Why do you like akechi so much? Not being rude I'm just really curious since I know the plot and a lot of people dislike him for it.

Let me be as concise as I can while answering this. Also spoilers.

1. His looks, I mean it depends on your tastes but at least to most people he’s pretty. (Also sexy if you finished the game and know what I mean…)

2. He has will power and determination, and the resilience to have lived through what he did.

3. His thoughts and motives are complicated and personal/relatable if you decide to think beyond the surface.

4. He is canonically designed to be opposite to Joker, AND he likes Joker, which is also canon.

5. His personas are awesome.

6. He is flawed and has very human drives and desires instead of being bored or wanting to just fuck people over because of some lofty ideals.

7. He has guts and would’ve been very good protagonist material too except, alas…

8. Miscellaneous: His outfits are elegant and suits him, he’s got great VAs for both JP and EN, he’s smart and witty, he’s a child at heart, he overturns expectations at the most unexpected places (he DOES NOT love pancakes ffs that meme should die), he’s an all around memorable and discussion-worthy character, which sadly is not the status of all characters in P5. Oh and he makes certain people so mad by virtue of being a popular antagonist character.

The essence of high status is privilege, and the essence of privilege is legitimate exception from the rules which apply to others …[C]onformers to the law … are divided between those who enjoy the law as a system of facilitations, a network of pathways, and those who suffer the law as a system of deprivations, of barriers. Similarly, those outside the law must be divided between persons who can evade it only by violating it (risking punishment) and those who are legitimately exempted from it and risk nothing. Why not obey the law, if it serves your interest? What need to violate it, except if it does not? And why be concerned at all, if you are beyond its authority? Justice is no longer even a lofty ideal: it is a vicious pretext by which the beneficiaries of power preserve their self-esteem while oppressing the twice punished. Stripped of that pretext, it is little more than a naked defense of class interest.
—  Richard Korn | Crime, Justice and Corrections (1971)

At first glance you might think that this couple could learn a lot from one another, and you’d probably be right. However, neither Aries nor Aquarius feels they have much to learn on a personal level, and their individual arrogance might be what holds them back. Aries can be selfish and arrogant in a direct, personal way. Aquarius is not arrogant on the surface, but does exhibit a kind of intellectual arrogance which will turn Aries right off. Aries and Aquarius compatibility can work well as a friendship or a professional relationship, but its quirks make it a tricky combination for love and romance. Aries and Aquarius are two of the most suitable signs that have a pretty decent degree of compatibility because they both share similar attributes of independence, thrill, and a deep level of love for freedom. When these two are together then can easily solve any type of problems through their use of mutual discussion.

An Aquarius is always supporting and helping to an Aries. They will always support the Aries. Aries, on the other hand, will want to support the new and unconventional approach of the Aquarius.  In a normal relationship between these two signs, tension is nonexistent. Aquarius will like and worship Aries’ way of life, their adventurous mind, and unconventional way of life. Balancing the relationship out, Aquarius will love the “magical” aspects of the relationship while the Aries will love the practical side of it. Aries, the Hero, wants to be loved and worshiped for his or her actions and bravery, which the ram likes to think are born of lofty ideals but which can actually be quite self serving. Aquarius, the Visionary, abhors selfishness, and wants to respected for his or her ideas – but isn’t honestly that bothered about being loved for them, and often struggles to put those ideas into practice in any case. The Visionary will tell the truth, even when it hurts, and will remain calm and distant while doing so. Aries the Hero, known for bluntness, will tell the truth too, but with added temper and fire. As two very energetic signs, this is an energetic relationship that is always in motion. Aries will love the out of the box ideas that Aquarius brings to the table. Aquarius loves how Aries goes after things, and the creative and passionate approach that Aries brings to the table. This is a match with excellent sexual chemistry as well, and these two will keep each other going in love for as long as the stars allow.

The Element of Air: The Breath of Relationship

In the natural zodiac wheel, the houses of relationship are the air houses. On first reflection, air is not an element that we would ascribe to relationship as it is can be separate, non-attached and distant. Its focus is more on the heavens than the earth, embracing lofty and transcendent ideals that inhibit commitment in relationship. Air is the spectator, not always the participant; the messenger but not necessarily the message. However, air encourages equality, individuality and consciousness, necessary in relationship to permit merger and union without the loss of self. Astrologically, this is represented by air preceding water in the zodiac. If there is a healthy sense of separateness, then this safeguards regressing to a union of total merger or surrender where the self is lost. Air encourages enough separateness to relate to someone different from ourselves. The houses of relationship provide a venue for this task, so that the merger into relationship can be conscious. Separateness and symbiosis, two polar instincts that underlie life, are continuously balanced by the element of air.

Airy qualities of detachment, non-attachment and witnessing are all important in the participation of equal relationship. In these houses we meet the witnesses of our life. The third house sibling witnesses our childhood years, shares the same history, the same culture and is the touchstone of our early life experiences. The seventh house partner witnesses in us the process of maturation and discovery in the world beyond the family. The eleventh house colleague and friend witnesses both our personal and professional experiences as we mature in the wider world. In these houses, the record of our personal developmental history is shared and witnessed by the significant others in our lives.

The air signs associated with these houses are Gemini, Libra and Aquarius. In the natural wheel, Gemini corresponds with the third house and is the restless search for the missing ‘twin’. Libra corresponds to the seventh house and is the quest for the ideal soul mate. Aquarius, the eleventh sign, is the journey towards social equality. The glyphs that represent these signs are dual, two lines detached from each other. Gemini and Aquarius are represented in human form while Libra is the only sign represented by an inanimate object – the scales. Duality, judging, weighing are all part of the process of relating.

The modern rulers of the air signs, Mercury, Venus and Uranus, as well as the classical ruler of Aquarius, Saturn, are the regents presiding over the territory of equal relationship. They are the deities we encounter in the archetypal process of individuation and relationship. Different forms of rulership also connect these signs together. Mercury rules Gemini and is also exalted in Aquarius or the eleventh house. Saturn, as the traditional ruler of Aquarius, is exalted in the sign of Libra. Venus rules Libra in traditional astrology and Gemini in esoteric astrology. Threads of amity run through these signs. Throughout the air signs and houses there are consistent symbols reminding us of the process of linking, connecting, bridging, as well as separation, duality and polarity.

So I’m working on the Kakashi’s Wish translation (the time travel comic) and there’s a part where Minato is quoting Hiruzen as saying that a Hokage has to consider every person in the village as his own family, which definitely comes from canon. I don’t believe canon ever calls Hiruzen out for his hypocrisy on this one, especially given that Boruto heavily relies on the theme of “Naruto the Hokage must put the village’s needs above his family’s wants”, but Hiruzen is such a hypocrite on this one.

Why do I say that? Because you can compare the treatment of Konohamaru, the Sandaime’s orphan grandson, to the other orphans in the series, and it’s not even close.

The reader first meets Konohamaru–who gets called “Honoured Grandson”–with his dedicated tutor Ebisu, who was in fact a tokubetsu jounin who specialized in teaching–in short, the person who Konoha considered to be the best teacher in all of Konoha. Ebisu got assigned to Konohamaru when he was just starting out at the academy, to teach him one-on-one. And sure, Konohamaru showed talent, but certainly less than Sasuke did; and one could easily argue that if Ebisu was going to have one-on-one time with anyone, it ought to have been Naruto, who was so massively underperforming considering the potential of his heritage and his chakra pool.

So Konohamaru, the Third’s grandson, got the best teacher in Konoha as his personal tutor, whereas other orphans didn’t get any tutor at all. Plus I will bet you a hundred thousand ryo that Konohamaru didn’t live alone, didn’t have to cook and clean for himself, and didn’t have to budget to be able to afford enough instant ramen to live.

“Everyone in Konoha is like my family”. Hiruzen could be such a great character because he’s such a flawed person, someone who 100% believes his own bullshit and who sincerely thinks he’s doing the right thing. His nickname of “the Professor” is too right because he’s honestly the worst of that kind of ivory tower stereotype that has these lofty ideals and believes in them so passionately but lacks the self-awareness to see how completely he’s failing these ideals in practice. He believes so hard that he’s Kindly Grandpa Hokage, but so many of the worst tragedies of the series are directly traceable to his actions or inactions.

Naruto the series came so close to giving some really powerful examples of how just intending to do the right thing is not enough (Itachi is an even more tragic example). The story shows so clearly how their choices massively backfired that I honestly forget sometimes that the story right to the end seems to think that the only thing that matters is that they were Good Guys Who Did the Right Thing. Don’t look any closer than that, don’t ask yourself if they did have other choices (even if they honestly didn’t perceive any), definitely don’t ask if some of the “wrong” choices wouldn’t have been more moral or had better results than the ones they actually took. (Would the death toll of innocents have truly been higher if Itachi had allied with his clan’s coup? If he had taken out Danzo and his sympathizers covertly to allow Hiruzen and the more moderate elements control? If he had attempted to whistleblow to Konoha at large all the fuckery that was going on? If he had decided “fuck you, fuck you, and especially fuck you, we’re out” and took li’l Sasuke and ran off to another country to open a dango and tomato stand? But I’m getting down a rabbit hole now. [Somebody write me an AU about Itachi and Li’l Sasuke’s Tomato ‘n’ Dango Shoppe.])

IDK if I should tag this hiruzen sarutobi or not? Does this count as character hate? IDK. If there are any Hiruzen fans who feel offended that this is tagged that, let me know and I will remove the tag and/or throw down with you about Hiruzen’s fuckboy-ness at your leisure.

DAY 3307

Jalsa, Mumbai                      Apr 17/18,  2017                 Mon/Tue 12:35 am 

Birthday - EF - Jonoon Alhob , Ninad Junnarkar , Manoj Lahoti  ….                       Tue, April 18 …. all our wishes for the birthdays of our dearest Ef’s .. may they all have a wonderful year and years ahead .. with our love and our affection ..

As the day draws to a close, and the mental preparations start for another 24 gone by, the mind begins to formulate what the the last task of the day shall begin with and how .. namely the connect with the Ef and the Blog and the other social mediums .. and everything that is thought of before coming to this stage of writing, simply goes out of the window .. nothing whatsoever remains within .. the words begin to form as the DAY is filled, the date adjusted and the time inserted  .. and as the space bar for ‘return’ is punched that is when the mind begins to wander and accumulate matter that shall find its way to that particular DAY as in DAY 3307 ..

Notice how craftily at least a dozen lines have been composed, merely on the subject of what the composition of the start should be .. I always knew I was stupid .. but that stupid !! hmmm ..

The first thoughts that rack the brain and the body as you arise are .. ‘ya buddy .. today we are going to conquer the World ‘ .. and within a few minutes of this rather blatantly over optimistically bent of mind laced with a strange arrogance, we discover that all of those lofty ideals and thoughts are washed away with the paste on the toothbrush under running tap, the flow of which determines what shall be the context of the days’ feelings .. the cold splash upon the sleepy skin of the face awakens to reality of life and its obstacles that we shall all have to face .. and it is quite strange is it not, that with that first flush of the acqua, numerous ideas and collective thoughts of accomplishment simply wash themselves away .. into oblivion and beyond …

What has been designed in the mind as activity, deactivates .. and the mundane everyday regulars take over, destroying all that could have been the beginnings of a satisfying 24 ..

BUT ..

the human is a peculiar and uncanny instrument of creation .. be it, what it may, .. the Adam or its rib as Eve .. they all are substantially equipped to muster enough courage to either survive or demolish any ideas of survival .. and the portion that remains ever the closest to the hemisphere, is the responsible, abject component, of this adventure .. 

When the cranium disagrees, or claims overworked conditions without the carrot of a promotion or a bonus .. all else, in what ever form falls apart ..

And the devastation is so acute that it can ruin your being for several 24′s of the time given to us in calculated form, by some mathematical geniuses of the Age of Revelation - whatever that may have been or is ..

Revelations are peculiar too .. after all they share the same peculiarity as the peculiarity of the creation of the the humanoid .. so some commonality exists .. and it is this commonality that we all succumb to .. at times to good and better climes .. most times at completely nothing ..

I can admit with absolute certainty, that I become a victim of this as often as the days that go by .. and therefore, when I subject my dearest Ef to some of this ‘bumff’ that goes by the name of a Blog, it is of great personal composure to learn the following morning or at times within minutes that, I was not too far wrong … !!

SO … as we shout and scream about the 9 years of this writing and the validity of its contents that seem to have been a source of immense connect and togetherness of a family .. I wonder .. and I wonder still ..

Sometimes the grey in appearance instills in the many that are below the age of the self to give it respect and love and admiration .. I shall accept it all with the hugest of humility .. but we all know that it is misplaced and not deserving .. I do prevent the occurrence of such like, when there is meeting .. but beyond expressing the ‘please do not do this’ there is little that can be done ..

Amidst the embarrassment that it causes me, my words seem to drift away without having meaningful effect .. and this is of greater concern and much disturbance .. and I do know that time shall come when it’s repeated actions shall eventually force one to accept it, in a manner that shall not be acceptable at all .. 

FOR .. now there is the flexibility to bend down and attempt to stop the practice .. in time however as age grows, the bend shall be physically difficult, and that is when the idea of preventing it shall wear thin and the practice shall become one that should or shall have to be accepted .. a practice that I shall never wish to cater to ever .. 


Good night .. with folded hands ..

Amitabh Bachchan 

Somewhere in Savannah

 2k word count. Post season 4 James/Thomas bliss :))) Beginning and ending with lofty ideals on paper but a lot of loving in-between. NSFW. Sorry I haven’t been writing for this blog as much lately; my other one keeps me plenty busy. But I am writing a nice long post-show reunion fic on AO3 so if you haven’t checked it out yet you should! And without further ado…


James leaned in close over his shoulder.

“Another treatise? What’s this one?”

Grateful for the interruption, he placed his quill back into the nearly empty pot of ink and leaned back in the chair, close enough that James’s ruddy beard tickled his ear.

“Actually I am basing it on piracy,” he replied with smile.


James came around and picked up the topmost parchment and skimmed it.

“It is a call for democracy,” he said proudly. “The very same ideals you have told me about in detail, except of course I am not using the term ‘piracy’ anywhere.”

James put down the paper and raised his eyebrows.

“So this is why you’ve kept hounding me about my knowledge about the inner workings of pirates these last weeks.”

Keep reading


1. Tell me about yourself. What is your most important characteristic?

LYRA, Nine of Water- play, healing, power of the arts

2. What are your strengths as a deck?

VIRGO, The Empress- curiosity, progress, perfection, beauty. order

3. What are your limits as a deck?

CAPRICORNNUS, Judgement- setting priorities, efficiency, practicality

4. What are you here to teach me?

CAMELOPARDALIS, King of Water- seeing the big picture, gaining perspective

5. How can I best learn to collaborate with you?

HOROLOGIUM, Eight of Earth- time passing, milestones, progression

6. What is the potential outcome of our working relationship?

ANTLIA, Two of Water- carefree, open-minded, second wind  

7. What is the one thing you would ask of me?

PERSEUS, Ten of Air- flaunting prowess, gain by unsavoury means

I was pretty eager to do this one, as I couldn’t get an immediate feel for this deck like I did with some of my others.

Interpretations under the cut 👇 

Keep reading

“Flag and Moon” by Milmon F Harrison

As an American man of African descent, each year the 4th of July evokes intense ambivalence. When I consider the paradox of slaveholders’ declaration of their “inalienable right” to freedom from oppression or the contemporary conditions of continuing and growing inequality I am deeply unsettled. I understand America’s flag to be, for some, a symbol of great ideals. Ideals literally worth dying for. But I also understand it to be the symbol to many of imperialism and colonization, genocide, violence against a country’s own citizens, and a whole host of ideas and practices that belie our lofty ideals.

I choose to see the flag as a symbol of struggle, of challenge to hypocrisy, of never allowing patriotism to make us forget about our long and violent process of becoming. It’s not about making America “great again;” greatness–in terms of fairness, justice, real equality–is something to which we still aspire and which this symbol reminds us to keep fighting for. May it encourage us to keep reaching higher and transcending our base instincts. That’s what it means to me this day.

anonymous asked:

Can you type Gandhi? Thanks

Aside from the positive contributions he made to political causes, in his personal life, he displayed all the negative aspects of INFJs. He spent his life battling hard against inferior Se, e.g., his obsession with lust and celibacy, his obsession with diet and fasting, his obsession with spiritual purity. He never truly grasped the right moral intention for developing self-restraint. He treated extreme self-restraint as a moral virtue and a life goal and even went so far as to try to get other people to follow his lofty (Ni) ideals and his shaky (Ti) “principles”. However, self-restraint is not something to aspire to for its own sake, it is actually a by-product of understanding oneself and developing one’s potential - proper self-restraint is not a struggle and it comes very naturally to those who truly know themselves.

Those who don’t know themselves don’t understand the actual source of good self-restraint, instead, they create a false self-image and then utilize self-restraint to force/shoehorn themselves into that ideal image because it helps to alleviate self-loathing, low self-esteem, or guilt (he was always feeling guilty about something or other), and then they can convince themselves that they are “pure” and thus “worthy” of whatever reward they are seeking. People who want to better themselves through strict rules of self-restraint generally fail because they don’t see that they are actually being driven by unconscious emotional problems. When you use self-restraint to ameliorate negative emotions, you end up shoving yourself into a cage that you built and then all you can think about is how life seems way more fun outside the cage, not realizing that you could simply unlock the door and exit at any time.

This kind of living does not produce real spiritual growth, rather, it is a denial of the true self and cutting off self-expression because you dislike yourself and believe that the only way you can love yourself (and feel loved) is to become something you aren’t, to cut yourself into pieces, twisting the parts than can be twisted into your perception of “perfection” and then trying to discard the “imperfections”. But every action has an equal and opposite reaction, so the more you restrict or deny something about yourself, the more that aspect of yourself gets distorted and STRENGTHENS in its ability to disrupt your mind (e.g. the grip). If you read his The Story of My Experiments with Truth, this inner conflict is quite apparent, especially in the way he constantly struggles with lustful impulses. When someone is only able to interpret natural and neutral acts like eating or sexual intercourse through the negative lens of “sin” or “lust”, it is an indication that they have unwittingly internalized problematic social/moral values. To want to “cleanse” oneself of these supposed “sins” is not the sign of a moral person but actually the sign of someone who is engaging in self-abasement, only acting to get some abstract form of approval and satisfy the internalized gaze of an imagined authority like society or god, much like a child who can act “good” for the promise of some faint praise (immature Fe).

anonymous asked:

Honestly i wish kaneki would have to encounter a situation one day that will force him to break his "taboo" on killing humans, because this is really ridiculous. Idk, some sort of moral conflict is needed. Like, is a life of a HUMAN RAPIST is still worthy more to him than feeding 20 ghoul orphans? Like...why can't dude just understand that his so-called ideals are unneeded load of shit that is built upon hypocrisy. Hell, at this rate, tooru can kill all goat on his eyes, and he will do nothing.

You’re at a ten anon, I’m going to need you to bring it down to like a seven.

Kaneki has the right idea in theory, after all overtaking the CCG through sheer murderous force alone by uniting all of the ghouls under the leadership of a one eyed ghoul determined to break the world has been attempted twice, and also failed twice and made things much harder for ghouls in the aftermath.

However, quite clearly the complete opposite approach is not working either and Kaneki makes a terrible Gandhi. 

Ideally then the answer would lie somewhere in between. After a long conversation with @midnight-in-town I’m starting to come around to the idea that the problem is not that Kaneki holds these lofty ideals of trying to get along peacefully, but rather that they go unexamined in him. Tsukiyama calls him out pretty handily.

We don’t see Kaneki’s face in his response, and he also changes the subject which could easily mean that Kaneki is refusing to look directly at the issue Tsukiyama brought up, he’s obfuscating once again. It’s likely that he does still sympathize with the CCG and his heart is not entirely in siding with the ghouls no matter how much he says otherwise. After all so far he’s avoided fighting any of the major killers, the Q’s, Juuou’s squad in a direct confrontation, most likely because they were among his closest friends in his three years spent in the CCG.

When Kaneki says the people he fights for are ghouls, he deliberately ignores the Q’s shoving them all to the side. When Mutsuki confronts him about whether or not he ever cared about his time spent at the CCG, Kaneki can’t even give him the smallest of answers.

It’s not bad that Kaneki has these lingering feelings of attachment towards the CCG, it’s only natural considering the time he spent there. It’s also probably what the fandom wants, and the middle ground between totally dismantling the CCG from the outside and pacifistic revolution that Kaneki ideall should seek. The problem is however that these feelings go unexamined. Kaneki refuses to confront them and instead doubles down on the thing that he knows is not working in the hopes that it might work if maybe he tries harder.

So we see characters, being presented with the chance of revolution and change, being confronted with the idea that all might not be as it seems, but then choosing to do simply as they’ve always done rather than choosing confrontation.

If you want an answer as to why ghouls are losing, or why this conflict perpetuates when it doesn’t have to, there it is right there. 

Gelatin silver matte photograph by Russel Ball on tan paper inscribed and signed,

To Miss Ann Harding ‘The Artiste’ a little token of appreciation for her talents and lofty ideals. 

Rudolph Valentino Nov. 24-1923.

(via  eBay)

I dream of a future when NASA and other space agencies band together to start exploring further out into our galaxy, deciding to call their new joint organization “Starfleet.” Certain Star Trek episodes are required viewing for recruits, especially the extraterrestrial ones who have no context of why the Prime Directive was established. The name “Gene Roddenberry” becomes known and revered throughout the galaxy – much like the fictional Surak on Vulcan. He is respected for postulating such lofty ideals while the rest of his species were still fighting wars and acting on base fears and prejudices. His teachings bring about peace and prosperity across the stars. 

Eruri Fic: Dreams

I guess this is the fic of the chapter 81 meta. Just what we need. Not.

The touch of skin is enough. The slow steady rhythm of Erwin’s pulse beneath his fingertips is enough to assure Levi that his dream lives on for one more night. 

Levi is a stoical man, not given to grand ideals, lofty goals and flights of fancy, but he is still a man and, like any man, he dreams.  As dreams go, Levi used to think that his was simple enough; Erwin alive, whole, and happy.  

But years of war have worn his dream away, eroded it to its very core; Erwin alive.

He will never be whole again; Levi knows this.  The war has ripped away more than Erwin’s arm; the outward injury conceals deeper wounds that Levi fears are far beyond his power to heal.

And happiness? Well, that was always just a futile dream, not meant for the likes of them.  There were brief moments when Levi had caught a glimpse of what might have been.  Moments when the heat and want coiled between them, when Levi shattered beneath Erwin’s touch, when blue eyes drifted closed, and they lay tangled together in the quiet of the aftermath.  Levi remembers the taste of Erwin’s skin, his hands at his throat, remembers Erwin filling the desperate emptiness inside of him, driving out the fear and loneliness and regret. And Levi remembers the softest smile, a memory so distant that he wonders if it was ever real. 

These are all just memories now. 

The heat that drew them together has long since been smothered by the weight of the dead.  The fire smoored until not a spark remains.  Though Levi knows there is an ember smouldering still, somewhere buried deep. 

It’s Erwin’s dream that drives them forward now and the closer it comes within reach, the more Levi can feel his own dream slipping through his fingers. Stubborn and tenacious as he is, Levi fears that Erwin alive is as improbable a dream as the ocean. 

But for now the touch of skin is enough.  Erwin’s pulse beating slow and steady against his fingertips.  Levi watches Erwin sleep, dream kept alive for another night, and wonders what the world will look like when he wakes.