so i wielded my songwriting powers and created a song about cishet aces and discourse. it’s written from the deep and powerful perspective of an aphobe suffering from internalized aphobia. hope u enjoy.
My knight, my sunshine, my love. You’re back for a while, back where I can see you and hold you and love you the way you were always meant to be loved. Seeing you breathes new life into me again and I feel so…so light, so free.
My mental health isn’t good this time of year. You know why, given all of my past tragedies and traumas that happened right around now. I’m going to struggle with feeling useless and lost and unlovable and there won’t be much you can do but reassure me that you’re here. You’re here with me even when you can’t be physically present.
I want a future with you. I’ve never been able to imagine a domestic life with anyone before, but I can with you, and I want it so desperately that it hurts. I want to share a bed and a shower and a home with you. I want you to come home after a long day at work to find me napping on my textbooks instead of studying. I want to cook and clean together and I want you to laugh at me for not being good at doing laundry.
It isn’t possible now, but years from now, I hope we get to have that. You said you would give me anything I wanted, that I could never ask too much of you. I want you. I want you and I to be together for as long as possible. I want us to keep making each other happy. I want to love you.
I promise to be patient if you do.
All my love,
PS: I know it’s not that big of a deal, and we really haven’t been together all that long, but I’m excited to cross that line where I become your longest relationship.