my professor (lovely man, married to our TA, 5'2", about as intimidating as a muffin) is a dendrologist by trade, so he studies trees. it was about three hours into our social sciences course, last lecture before exams, everyone was frazzled and exhausted, so he told us about his most exciting/in-depth research to date to cheer us up.
(the few of us who actually showed up were like “ok sir im sure its fascinating” but in our minds we were totally like its trees what. is. exciting. about trees. You might be wondering the same thing - the acorns? the leaves? the roots? BUT NO. IMMA FUCKIN TELL YA.)
ANYWAY we settle in, he had a few pictures loaded up from his field work (we were chuckling at this point…. ‘hehehe field work’ i giggled to my frend. its trees.) and began to tell his tale. it’s long, imma warn you, but……. god. just read it.
theres an species of tree called the cucumber tree (Magnolia acuminata, if ya wanna get all Latin-y). its super endangered, in our region there’s only ~280 that are registered by the government, yadda yadda yadda. my prof thought that was tragic (i know) but also strange, because when he was writing his thesis about local trees years ago, he kept coming across cucumber trees in really random places. we’re talking like backyards, independently-owned nurseries, etc. WHICH IS IMPOSSIBLE because, according to tree law (i know) it is very strictly protected by the government, and thus super “illegal to possess, transport, collect, buy or sell any part of a living or dead member of a listed species if it originates from wild sources.” essentially, the govt takes control over growing the trees and anyone who independently raises them is breaking the law (i know)
so he’d ask people “do you have a permit for these trees?” and they were like “uh no, it’s just a tree someone sold me, i think it looks nice, are you gonna arrest me?” so he’d be like “nah nah nah just tell me who sold it to you”
eventually, months/years later, someone did, and turns out it was like this underground sort-of illegal tree dealing club (i know). so my prof went, got a bit of funding from the government, who were getting pissed at independent cucumber tree numbers, and THIS IS WHERE IT GETS INTO THE GOOD SHIT I STG.
he infiltrates the tree trafficking organization. he buys a cucumber tree from an independent nursery, raises it for months, ensures he gets noticed by the traffickers, and then INFILTRATES it and convinces its leader to LET HIM JOIN. he has to pay like a steep entrance fee, which he does (and it blows my mind that the government of my country paid money to illegal tree dealers), but then he is given full access to records and maps because they think he’s one of them, not a SECRET AGENT.
now this part blows my mind because the tree lords don’t even have to try very hard to find cucumber trees because government agents MARK THE TREES AND DISTINCTLY TAG THEM SAYING THIS IS ENDANGERED DO NOT TOUCH. so, ya know…………. it’s a bit obvious. my prof hangs out with the members so much that he figures out their “hit spots”. these are where the trees are relatively secluded and unguarded. (he writes all this shit and numbers down for his research.)
BUT THATS NOT ENOUGH BECAUSE THE GOVT SAYS HES WASTING THEIR FUNDING IF HE DOESNT HAVE PROOF and they are willing to take LEGAL ACTION for misuse of funding (my prof doesn’t have the money nore time nor power to take them to court, which would also blow his cover). so my prof literally STAKES OUT a copse of cucumber trees at a recognized wildlife reserve for. DAYS. he camps there, and watches the trees, is about to give up, he’s going off an unreliable rumor from the traffickers that a harvester would be going there within the next week. finally, this guy comes and takes the cucumber tree seeds from the CLEARLY MARKED trees by the government, and my prof takes pictures (we are shown these pictures, most of us are speechless at this point). dozens of candid shots of a man my grandpa’s age with a grocery store bag, garden shears, and a ladder, clipping away the illegal seeds and then going on his merry fucking way.
so my prof has the proof, he’s been undercover for months now at this point, he writes up his report, gives it to the government who is like…….. “oh shit”, helps them draft up a new LESS COMPLETELY FUCKING OBVIOUS way of marking endangered trees (so that way non-tree-lovers wouldn’t damage them further, etc.), and then never returns to the tree traffickers. he’d given them a fake name, address, everything….. he disappears.
…there was a full minute of stunned silence from us students at this point, during which he grew more and more nervous (again, he’s a muffin) and all of us students are just like……. “whoa.” we asked him what happened to the remaining illegal cucumber trees & if he turned the tree dealers in to the government, and that is when he smiles a little bit and shows us the last few pictures. because here’s the kicker… he never turned the smugglers in. he burned all the data he collected, defied the government pressuring him to turn them in, and the only reason he’s not incarcerated is because his work is so prominent in certain circles now & universities love him, that there would be an uproar if he got arrested. he’s like a fucking anti-hero and then he tells us (i’ll never forget, it’s the most inspirational green-thumb thing in the world) “it may be 'illegal’, but those who risk their liberty to ~save the world~ should never be reprimanded, no matter what those in power say.”
we are all stunned. some of us are considering dendrology as a field we’d now be interested in pursuing. he clicks his slide one final time, before we leave our last lecture and, since he had an asthma attack (lil muffin) he didn’t attend our exam, so i never see him again…………
and there, on the slides, the last picture? THERE HE IS. in his own backyard. with his equally lovely TA wife. both grinning innocently, standing underneath a……. FUCKING. FULL GROWN. ILLEGAL. CUCUMBER TREE.
I would love to se top ten pranks Phichit and Yuuri pulled on each other?
Top Ten Pranks Phichit and Yuuri Pulled On Each Other:
10) Phichit once complained too
much that the Viktor poster Yuuri had up was freaking him out and Yuuri refused
to take it down so Phichit stuck removable googly eyes on it instead to make it
9) The one mentioned in a
previous top ten where Phichit took a video of Yuuri looking very cute while
sleeping before proceeding to chuck a bucket of ice cold water onto him
8) As part of a revenge prank, Yuuri replaced Phichit skates with an identical pair owned by another skater at
the rink that were just a bit too small and watched Phichit suffer the whole
training session after convincing him that it was the same pair and Phichit’s
ankles must just be getting fat
7) Yuuri once stole Phichit’s
phone and got into his Instagram. The day before Phichit had posted a picture
of him looking good captioned ‘I woke up like this’ and Yuuri took and posted a
really awful one of Phichit sleeping and drooling a bit after a long night studying
passed out on his desk and captioned it ‘He didn’t wake up like that
6) Phichit replaced Yuuri’s
workout clothes in his bag without Yuuri noticing until he got to the dance
studio and was too embarrassed to be late by turning back. Since he couldn’t do
a pole dance lesson in jeans he had to do it in booty shorts with ‘are you
nasty’ written across the back. His instructor thought it was hilarious.
5) In return for the booty shorts
thing, one day, after Phichit had been out to a party the night before even though they had early
morning training the next day, Yuuri stole all his clothes including his sport
clothes and hid them out of the apartment so that Phichit was forced to go to
training in his party clothes. Celestino’s general reaction was ‘Phichit
Chulanont if you think I’m letting you get on the ice in ripped jeans and a
crop top you are very wrong and you are on fitness training for the whole day.’
4) Phichit did the classic ‘replacing
the shampoo with hair dye’ except he did it two days before a big competition
and Yuuri was very close to having to skate in public with weird, patchy, bleach blond hair.
This was when Celestino officially banned the prank wars for good
3) Yuuri once stole Phichit ‘King
and the Skater’ DVD and replaced it with a disk containing a compilation of videos of Phichit falling over on the ice. Phichit might have more recordings of Yuuri
decking it but Yuuri had a few good ones too
2) Once Yuuri hit his head really
badly after failing a quad flip and, seeing a perfect opportunity, convinced
Phichit that by hitting his head he had forgotten how to speak English. Phichit
spent the whole day fretting over him and trying to badly translate
everything Yuuri said and it only ended when Yuuri broke character and started
cracking up that night
1) Once, about a year after
Phichit found out about Yuuri and Viktor, Phichit broke into Yuuri’s locker at
the skate club and turned it into a typical high school crush locker with loads
of pictures and posters of Viktor with little hearts drawn all over them and ‘Yuuri
Nikiforov’ postits and stuff. All the skaters who saw it the next day thought
it was hilarious but then a couple of years later Yuuri and Viktor actually got
together and they wondered if maybe it was a sign
Over the last few semesters, I developed my own system of revising for exams. I’m a visual learner and writing things down in an organised way helps me loads. I posted pictures of my exam notes several times before (here, here, here, here) and I use this format for basically every class that requires an exam instead of an essay - so far: calculus 1, real analysis, maths education, english literature, and teaching german as a second language. Many people really liked this format, so here’s a step-by-step guide on how I do it!
blank A4 paper
one sheet of A4 grid paper
a black gel pen by Kyocera (you can use any pen, but it should have a somewhat fine tip and should dry easily)
Stabilo fine liners point88 (one or two matching colours per class)
a set square (imo that works better than a ruler)
a Faber-Castell 0.7 Grip 1347 pencil in 2B (you can use any pencil you like, but it should be HB or 2B because you need to erase it later)
lecture notes/slides, class notes, homework, basically any info that is necessary for the exam
Place the grid paper underneath the blank one. Make sure it doesn’t move when you write (if necessary, use paperclips to hold it in place).
Draw margins and aid lines (in pencil - you’ll erase these later). Measure them out so they’ll be the same on every sheet. I usually do approximately 1cm margins left, right, and bottom, 2.5cm margin at the top for title and subheading, and three columns: left one with a width of 6cm, middle one with 5cm, right one with 6cm and 0.5cm blank space between them. (The grid paper underneath will help.) You can also only make two columns - four columns is gonna be very hard though because that won’t leave you with much space.
Every time you have a list, bullet points, step-by-step guides etc, indent the bullets by another 0.5cm (draw another aid line for this). If you have sub-bullets, indent them another 0.5cm and so on.
I use colours for bullet points (the actual points /arrows /numbers/ whatever), important names, something that I’m defining, subheadings, and important dates.
Start writing your notes. Make them as condensed as you possibly can without leaving important points out. I try to go for one A4 page per lecture (aka around 28 powerpoint slides or more on one page), but sometimes I’ll also end up with two.
Use abbreviations for words you use a lot, e.g. “+” for “and”, “p.” for “problem”, “str.” for “strategies”, “lit.” for “literature” etc.
You can absolutely include important diagrams/graphs etc. Either print them out in the size you need or draw them by hand and in the colours you need. If it doesn’t fit in one column, spread it out over two columns and continue the separated columns underneath/above.
Make your bullet points mean something. Use numbers, arrows, flags, lowercase letters, uppercase letters, dots - each can have a different meaning. Are you writing something where the order is important (numbers)? Are you giving examples (dots)? Are you mentioning separate important key points (flags)?
I wrote my last summary page for maths education today and stopped the time - I needed 50 minutes for one lecture with 27 slides (new material because I hadn’t been there), including a small chocolate break.
4. Final Touches
Check if the ink has dried. Check again.
Carefully erase the pencil aid lines with a good eraser. make sure you don’t wrinkle the paper (unless you don’t care about that sort of stuff haha)
If you want to, you can highlight key words (or whatever you like).
Number your pages if you’ll write several. I always write down the number of the lecture (session 1, session 2 etc) in the subheading.
Optional, but I do it: Make a copy of your sheet that you carry around with you. Nothing is as frustrating as spilling coffee over your revision sheets. Put the original in a plastic sleeve and keep it in a folder or binder somewhere, and study/revise only with the copy. Especially useful if you have others quizzing you with your summaries and they don’t care if they rip/wrinkle/ruin them lmao
I hope this was somewhat informative! You can tweak it of course, depending on what class you have and what will be on the exam. I hope you’re having a nice weekend! :)
You will win; - Craft grade deer skull - Craft grade mink skull - Pheasant feather - Blackbird foot (preserved) - Gorgeous shell - Tooth scavenged from the Thames - Big sheep half pelvis with gnarly arthritis - Mandible from the same big sheep - Various misc things not pictured here which will be added to the giveaway as I find them!
RULES: - Reblog as many times as you want (extra reblogs count as entries but don’t spam your followers!), likes don’t count as entries but like away if you wish. - You must be following this blog (morbidesque). Follows on Instagram (@TenvisHund) and my art blog @tenvishund are not mandatory but will count as extra entries! Following just for the giveaway is fine. - The winner will be randomly drawn on the 31st of July 2017. Winner has 48 hours to reply before another will be chosen - UK and EU ONLY, sorry! American vultures feel free to reblog for your followers though! - You must be 18 years old, or have your parents permission to enter. You must also be comfortable to give me your address if you win. - This giveaway is in no way associated with Tumblr. - Do not tag as giveaway, or reblog to giveaway side blogs
top ten times yuuri katsuki was charming without him noticing
Top Ten Times Yuuri Katsuki Was Charming Without Him Noticing:
10) At a competition a little girl got lost and started
crying and he calmed her down and let her ride on his shoulders all the way
back to the rink when he went to find her parents
9) A fan gave him some artwork to sign and said ‘sorry, it
isn’t very good’ and despite being busy and in the middle of signing autographs
he still stopped and took a good few minutes to sincerely compliment her work
and style which made her blush so badly
8) At college he organised a study group for people who were
struggling on his course to share his notes and ended up unofficially tutoring
most of them for free and every single person who attended was a least
partially in love with him by the end
7) In the skate club in Detroit one of the ice dancers hurt
his leg in practice and so Yuuri offered to help the girl who was left without a
partner practice her routine by standing in for him even though he was embarrassed
that he didn’t really know the moves well. She was incredibly grateful, he
learned a bit of ice dancing and every other skater was insanely jealous of her
6) Once a couple proposed in front of him after one of his
competitions and he very sweetly congratulated them and offered to take a photo
but ended up being in the photo instead at their insistence
5) He did a guest appearance at an ice skating class for
children and was really, really good with the kids and encouraging them with
their skating and being generally a wonderful teacher and all the young single
parents were sighing over him and looking at each other like ‘he’s mine, I’m
calling it first, back off’.
4) He donated a lot of money to a dog shelter in Detroit and
there were loads of pictures and videos of him there playing with the puppies
and everyone’s hearts collectively melted
3) Once a girl at the skating club didn’t have anyone to go
to a fancy dance with her and she was embarrassed to go alone. Since Yuuri knew
he was a decent dancer he offered to go with her as friends so that she could
still go and it was a really sweet and considerate gesture and they spent the
evening having fun and owning everyone else in the room with how well they
danced. That girl was the one mentioned in chapter 14 who later invited Yuuri and
Phichit to her wedding. She met her future wife at that dance, which she
wouldn’t have gone to without Yuuri offering to help her out
2) That time he took the triplets backstage in chapter 12
and everyone was like ‘awwww’
1) Every little thing he did that made Viktor fall even more
in love with him over the years which was a lot and happened often