Adventuring Belladonna Took!

I have a lot of headcanons (all of which are derived from that line about how she “had no adventures after she was married” therefore implying she had adventures before):

  • Belladonna was that kid who went traipsing everywhere and came back home covered in mud and leaves, bright-eyed and overjoyed with some new corner of the Shire she’d discovered.
  • Gandalf noticed this, and occasionally took her with him when he was traveling around the Shire, at first as a guide but then later as a helper.
  • In her late tweens Gandalf told Belladonna he had some friends who could use a hobbit’s help, and Belladonna went off to the aid of the Dúnedain, to act as a burglar and steal back their heirlooms from various brigands or recover them from tombs in the Barrow-downs, so on and so forth.  (This one is inspired by the Bree-land quests in LotRO.)  During this time Belladonna befriended several Dúnedain.
  • During the Fell Winter in TA 2911-12, Belladonna was the one who contacted the Dúnedain and asked for aid for the Shire.  A young Bilbo was quite surprised (and intrigued) to see his mother chatting so easily with all these tall outsiders.
  • Bungo and Bilbo loved to hear Belladonna spin tales about her adventures, although they always teased her about exaggerating things.
  • Several of the knick knacks and heirlooms around Bag End were Belladonna’s, and several of Bilbo’s books are her handwritten accounts of her adventures.
  • Belladonna and Bilbo were very close.  As a child, Bilbo’s natural curiosity and urge to explore were encouraged by Belladonna.  If she’d been alive when Bilbo went off with the Dwarves, she would’ve been so proud.

Y Dios me hizo mujer,
de pelo largo,
nariz y boca de mujer.

Con cur­vas
y plie­gues
y sua­ves hon­do­na­das
y me cavó por den­tro,
me hizo un taller de seres huma­nos.

Tejió deli­ca­da­mente mis ner­vios
y balan­ceó con cui­dado
el número de mis hor­mo­nas.
Com­puso mi san­gre
y me inyectó con ella
para que irri­gara
todo mi cuerpo;
nacie­ron así las ideas,
los sue­ños,
el instinto.
Todo lo que creó sua­ve­mente
a mar­ti­lla­zos de sopli­dos
y tala­dra­zos de amor,
las mil y una cosas que me hacen mujer todos los días
por las que me levanto orgu­llosa
todas las maña­nas
y ben­digo mi sexo.

—  Gioconda Belli
Late Nights

Ethan lie awake staring at the ceiling. Without moving any other part of his body, he raised his hand, checking the time on his phone. 2:37am. Great. Another one of those nights. He feels lost and confused. He can’t pin point why though, and it bothers him. Suddenly he’s filled with words. He needs to let them out. Ethan sat up suddenly, grabbing his phone and typing away. His thumb hitting the not-real keys on his phone furiously.

Draft: I want to be next to you. Right now and until the end of my existence. I want to wander the world with you. It sounds stupid but I can’t keep bottling up these emotions. I don’t know if I love you or not and I can’t tell you right now but I do know that right here and now you’re all I can think about. I want to gaze at the stars with you and watch sunsets together. Beautiful sunsets, the ones that take your breathe away and all you can say is “It’s lovely.” And we can number the starts, never leaving each others side until we’re done. This is crazy but maybe that’s what we all need in our lives. A little bit of crazy, and spontaneous, and adventure. A little bit of you, Tyler Scheid, that’s what I need.

He typed it all out. It was there, raw and open. The “To” line stayed blank. Ethan read back over it, then corrected all the grammatical mistakes. He began typing “Tyl-” into the empty space. His thumb moved to click the suggested contact. But it hesitated. In that moment of hesitation Ethan noticed a subtle sound through out the house. Tyler’s snoring.

Ethan’s thumb moved again. Not to the contact this time, but to the backspace button. He deleted the beginnings of his best friends name, and eventually the whole message. It was gone, as if this never happened. He never felt the things he did. There was no proof of it anyways. Ethan put his phone back down, and began staring up at the ceiling once more. Eventually, sleep took him.

No Man’s Land

Music: (Lyrics start at 4:09)

Nᵒ ᵐᵃⁿ ᵃˡⁱᵛᵉ ᵗʰⁱˢ ᵖˡᵃⁿᵉᵗ ᶜᵃⁿ ⁱˡˡᵘᵐⁱⁿᵃᵗᵉ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵖᵃᵗʰ
  ᴺᵒ ᵍᵘⁱᵈᵉ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᶜᵃᵐᵉ ᵇᵉᶠᵒʳᵉ ᶜᵃⁿ ˢʰᵒʷ ᵗʰᵉ ʷᵃʸ ᵇᵉʸᵒⁿᵈ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖᵃˢˢ
ᴺᵒ ᶠᵒᵒᵗᵖʳⁱⁿᵗˢ ᵒⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ᵗʳᵃⁱˡ ᶠᵒʳ ʸᵒᵘ ᵗᵒ ᶠᵒˡˡᵒʷ ⁱⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ᵗʳᵃᶜᵏˢ ᶠᵒʳ ʸᵒᵘ ᵗᵒ
                                   ᵐᵃᵏᵉ ⁱᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ʰᵃᵛᵉ ᵗᵒ ˡᵉᵃᵛᵉ ʷⁱᵗʰᵒᵘᵗ ᵗʰᵉ ᵐᵃᵖ

  ᴬⁿᵈ ⁿᵒ ᵃᵐᵒᵘⁿᵗ ᵒᶠ ᵖˡᵉᵃᵈⁱⁿᵍ ᶜᵃⁿ ʳᵉˡᵉᵃˢᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ᵗʰᵉ ᵗʳᵃᵖ
ᵀʰᵉʳᵉ’ˢ ⁿᵒ ᵈᵉᵍʳᵉᵉ ᵒᶠ ᵗᵒⁱˡ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᶜᵃⁿ ˢᵉʳᵛᵉ ᵗᵒ ᵇʳⁱᵈᵍᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ᵍᵃᵖ
Yᵒᵘ ᶜᵃⁿ ᵗʳᵉᵏ ᵃᶜʳᵒˢˢ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵃⁱⁿˢ ʷⁱᵗʰᵒᵘᵗ ᵐᵘᶜʰ ʷᵉⁱᵍʰᵗ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵇᵃᶜᵏ
            ᴮᵘᵗ ⁱᶠ ʸᵒᵘ’ʳᵉ ᵗᵒʳᵗᵘʳᵉᵈ ⁱⁿ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵐⁱⁿᵈ, ʸᵒᵘ ʷⁱˡˡ ᶜʳᵘᵐᵇˡᵉ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠᵃᶜᵗˢ
  ˢᵒ ᶠˡᵉᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ˢʰᵉˡᵗᵉʳ ᶠᵒʳ ᵗʰᵉ ˢᵗᵒʳᵐ ᵇᵉᶠᵒʳᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ᶜᵃᵛᵉˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵃᵖˢᵉ

ᴵ’ᵛᵉ ˢᵗᵒᵒᵈ ᵃᵐᵒⁿᵍ ᵗʰᵉᵐ ˡⁱᵏᵉ ᵃ ᵍʰᵒˢᵗ ᵗʰᵉʸ ᶠᵃⁱˡ ᵗᵒ ʳᵉᶜᵒᵍⁿⁱᶻᵉ
Aᵐⁱᵈˢᵗ ᵗʰᵉ ᶜᵃᵗᵗˡᵉ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵗʰᵉ ʷᵒˡᵛᵉˢ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ʳᵒᵃᵐ ᵗʰᵉ ᶜᵒᵘⁿᵗʳʸˢⁱᵈᵉ
       ˢᵗᵒᵒᵈ ᵇᵉᵗʷᵉᵉⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ᵗʳᵉⁿᶜʰᵉˢ ʷʰᵉʳᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ˢᵒᵘⁿᵈ ᵒᶠ ᵇᵃᵗᵗˡᵉ ᶜʳⁱᵉᵈ
             ᵂʰᵉʳᵉ ʳᵉᵃˢᵒⁿ ʷᵉⁿᵗ ᵗᵒ ᵈⁱᵉ ᵃˡᵒⁿᵍ ᵗʰᵉ ᵍʳᵒᵘⁿᵈ ʷʰᵉʳᵉ ᴴᵉˡˡ ᵃⁿᵈ ᴱᵃʳᵗʰ ᶜᵒˡˡⁱᵈᵉ

ᴬⁿᵈ ⁿᵒʷ ᴵ ˢᵗᵃⁿᵈ ʷʰᵉʳᵉ ᶠᵒʳᵗᵘⁿᵉ ˢʰⁱᶠᵗˢ ᵃⁿᵈ ᶜʰᵃⁿⁿᵉˡˢ ᵒᵖᵉⁿ ʷⁱᵈᵉ
    ᵂʰᵉʳᵉ ᵉˢˢᵉⁿᶜᵉ ᶠˡᵒʷˢ ʷⁱᵗʰⁱⁿ ᵗʰᵉˢᵉ ʳⁱᵛᵉʳˢ ᵘⁿᵈᵉʳ ᵒᵖᵉⁿ ˢᵏʸ
         ᴵ’ᵐ ⁱⁿ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᵖˡᵃᶜᵉ ʷʰᵉʳᵉ ᶠᵉʷ ʰᵃᵛᵉ ᵇᵉᵉⁿ ᵗʰᵒᵘᵍʰ ᵐᵃⁿʸ ᵗʳⁱᵉᵈ ˢᵒ ⁱᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ˢᵗᵃⁿᵈ ᶠᵒʳ ˢᵒᵐᵉᵗʰⁱⁿᵍ, ˢᵗᵃⁿᵈ ᶠᵒʳ ˢᵒᵐᵉᵗʰⁱⁿᵍ ᵐᵒʳᵉ ᵗʰᵃⁿ ˢⁱᵐᵖˡʸ ˢᵗᵃⁿᵈⁱⁿᵍ ᵇʸ

Tʰⁱˢ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᵍᵉᵐ ᵗᵒ ᶠⁱⁿᵈ
ᵀʰⁱˢ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᶜᵉʳᵗᵃⁱⁿ ᵏⁱⁿᵈ
ᵀʰⁱˢ ᵗʰᵉ ᵗʳᵘᵗʰ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ʰⁱᵈᵉˢ
ᵀʰⁱˢ ⁱˢ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᵍʳᵉᵃᵗ ᵈⁱᵛⁱᵈᵉ
ᴮʳᵉᵃᵏ ᵒᵘᵗ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᵗᵒᵐᵇ
ᵀʰᵃᵗ ᵉᵐᵖᵗʸ ʳᵒᵒᵐ ᴵ’ᵛᵉ ᵇᵉᵉⁿ ⁱⁿˢⁱᵈᵉ

ᴺᵒ ᵐᵉᵗʰᵒᵈ, ⁿᵒ ᵖˡᵃⁿˢ
ᴺᵒ ᵈⁱʳᵉᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵗᵒ ᵃᵈᵛᵃⁿᶜᵉ
ᴶᵘˢᵗ ˢᵗᵉᵖ ᵃᶜʳᵒˢˢ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ˡⁱⁿᵉ ᵗʰᵃᵗ’ˢ ⁱⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ˢᵃⁿᵈ
Tʰⁱˢ ⁱˢ ᵗʰᵉ ˡᵃⁿᵈ ᵒᶠ ⁿᵒ ᵐᵃⁿ

things said on skype starters. 

❝ Congrats. You are a rich white girl. ❞
❝ Meant to be. ❞
❝ Oh god, I’m gonna die a hetro. ❞
❝ That’s it. Get in the octagon, you bitch. ❞
❝ I’m going to shove a XXL shrek dildo up your ass. ❞
❝ The only thing I need is black coffee to fill my darkened soul. ❞
❝’He’s nice’ is code for ‘his dick was in my mouth’. ❞
❝ Shove a flaming mailbox up their puny asshole. ❞
❝ And I have 99 ways to kill you, but I’m not bragging. ❞
❝ Can someone please murder me? ❞
❝ I look like a tanned, wrinkly walnut. ❞
❝ I’m married to jesus, you fuck. ❞
❝ That’s it. I’m kidnapping you. ❞
❝ I love you, but you’re seriously a dumbass. ❞
❝ You’re breaking my achy breaky heart. ❞
❝ Stop being so cute and talented. It pisses me off. ❞
❝ To see the boner, you must first be the boner. ❞
❝ Satan was the most beautiful angel. He had the most beautiful barf. I’m sure. ❞
❝ Dark humor isn’t everybody’s cup of liquidized dead baby. ❞
❝ I’d say ‘mark me down as scared and horny’, but I don’t get scared. Just horny. ❞
❝ Bitch, give me my fucking McMuffin or so help me, I will shove this fucking gun up your ass and fire it. ❞
❝ My ass is great, but I am not. ❞
❝ I will rip out your eyes and feed them to you. ❞
❝ No, I’m not buying a virtual dildo. ❞
❝ Why am I way more hardcore? I want answers. ❞
❝ That’s more unrealistic than world peace. ❞
❝ You know what else is really hard? My dick. ❞
❝ What’s the opposite of excellent? Gay? ❞
❝ Were you here when we talked about dick suckers anonymous? ❞
❝ That sounds like a you problem. ❞
❝ May the pussy spirit possess you. ❞
❝ I wish my uterus wasn’t such a little bitch. ❞
❝ I proudly have no dick. ❞
❝ God, I just love talking shit about people. ❞
❝ I’m so cute though that I’m pretty sure I’d be forgiven for murder. ❞
❝ May the gay be with us. ❞
❝ Get your ass back here. ❞
❝ My kink is vengeance and equality. ❞
❝ Go suck Donald Trump’s moldy dick. ❞
❝ Dweeb means ‘dick with eyebrows’ so you’re calling someone a walking
penis. ❞
❝ There is no con, you whore. ❞
❝ I’m not a ho, I’m a slut. ❞
❝ Pinch my cheeks and I’ll bite your finger off. ❞
❝ Stab him. ❞
❝ I have never appreciated being nippled more. ❞
❝ I’m so gay. ❞
❝ I will fucking fight you. ❞
❝ Go suck a dick, but with love. ❞
❝ Listen bitch. ❞
❝ I say some bombass shit. ❞
❝ Oh, that person is dead. Sucks for them. ❞
❝ Fry me, daddy. ❞
❝ Are we telling God to fry us? ❞
❝ I know what I said, bitch ass hoe. ❞

Samuel de Luque: “...Yo, cuando encuentre el sitio diré, aquí quiero vivir y yo sabré que he encontrado ese sitio, tal vez muchas veces el sitio, creo que está vinculado a la persona con la que estés, si yo conozco a una persona  que me hace feliz, estaré con esa persona donde el..lla. viva, sinceramente es decir..., si yo creo que sí...”

Samuel de Luque,  18 oct. 2014 hasta hoy sigue viviendo acompañado z4