The Australian ex-model Turia Pitt suffered burns to 65 percent of her body, lost her fingers and thumb on her right hand and spent five months in hospital after she was trapped by a grassfire in a 100 kilometre ultra-marathon in the Kimberley. Her boyfriend decided to quit his job to care for her recovery. Days ago, in an interview for CNN they asked him:
“Did you at any moment think about leaving her and hiring someone to take care of her and moving on with your life?”
His reply touched the world:
“I married her soul, her character, and she’s the only woman that will continue to fulfill my dreams.”
Mindfulness skills are central to DBT. Mindfulness itself is the act of consciously focusing the mind in the present moment without judgment or attachment. Mindlessness, the opposite of mindfulness, is when you’re just going through the motions on autopilot. Mindfulness is SUPER important to your life worth living. It can improve your quality of life by helping you truly live in the moment and experience your life.
Mindfulness is NOT limited to meditation. It is much much more than that. You will NOT have to meditate to practice mindfulness, don’t worry. I was really skeptical of mindfulness at first because I’m not into what I considered “hippie-dippy” activities (very judgmental of me). But once I’d eliminated self destructive behaviors I was left with the apathy of depression. My therapist kept telling me that mindfulness was the last piece of the puzzle in my life worth living. So I had to try it. And bit by bit my life has improved through even minimal practice of mindfulness. Long story short: it’s legit.
The mindfulness skills:
Keep watching for detailed posts about each skill!!!!!
You’re a work of art. Every fault you have makes you unique to the world. Some people won’t understand your beauty, but the ones who matter will adore every little “imperfection”. The best part? We never stop adding details to our masterpiece.
I read this quote from Robin Williams yesterday and it really spoke to me. Before I gave up alcohol I thought I needed it to enjoy life. How else would you be social? How else would you be able to eat dinner or go dancing? Thinking back to the times before I started drinking, I was more than capable of doing all those things. I am finding now, after giving it up, that I am learning once again how to enjoy those things without a drink. It’s a slow process, but it’s working.
I walk through the door of the grocery store, and head towards what I need. As I make my way there an employee lifts his head and sees me. He quickly looks back, and does a double take. I make eye contact with him, smile, and say hi. He then walks away, and I happen to catch a moment later him and his buddy both looking at me, while smiling and nudging the other. I quickly look away, and never look back. This took place yesterday, but it could have been an experience I had a year ago, when I was closer to 250 pounds. Both experiences trigger similar feelings and thoughts. I feel exposed by attracting this unwanted attention, and feeling like I am doing something wrong by receiving it. As always, I have no way of truly knowing what was going on for the other participants of this scenario. Maybe he recognized me, and had not seen my transformation. However, it didn’t feel like that was what was playing out. When I was obese, I was use to that experience feeling extremely negative and traumatizing. Therefore, perceiving it as a positive experience can be a stretch. To take it a step further, if it is positive, and unsolicited I can feel defensive that I’m doing something wrong. In the past, I couldn’t take a compliment and now I can. I feel exponentially better than I did before, and am happier than I’ve ever been. If I am walking down the street smiling or saying hi, I don’t want to be creeped out when people are equally friendly. In the past, I have used my weight as a barrier to hide behind. It kept me sick and miserable, but also somehow cushioned. Walking around without that padding leaves me feeling more vulnerable. However, the day to day hard work I’ve done, in order to manifest this transformation, leaves me confident enough to know that I am worthy of being my best self, and that I will be able to love and take care of myself no matter what. I know that standing up straight, smiling, making eye contact, and taking care of my mind, body, and spirit are not wrong. They are necessary for a happy healthy life. I am grateful! Xoxo