I wish that I didn’t feel so sick so easily and often. I could plan my day out and stick to it, get everything done on time. But sometimes it’s hard to get out of bed, especially after a long night of frequent trips to the bathroom. I get behind on my to-do’s. I’m tired. I wish I didn’t have to take long naps that took away time from studying. I wish I could concentrate on my schoolwork without any breaks. I want to feel okay for more than a few hours at a time, for more than a few days at a time. I wish I wasn’t prone to infections and slow healing. It takes so much time away from living normally and feeling good. I wish I had more of an excuse to miss school, but it’s never anything new–every few days is an off day. It’s rarely bad enough to have to take a sick day. But I’d rather be home in bed. I wish I had more guts and care for myself to say no when I don’t feel well enough to go out. I wish I didn’t feel guilty for canceling plans. I wish I had a better appetite and more energy and more happiness to share. Feeling abnormal is my normal. My good days are amazing but they are fleeting and infrequent. I wish I could have more days where I feel perfectly fine.
I know it’s already the 5th of the month but I pray you all have a very blessed year! Whether 2015 was the best year of your life or the worst, you came out of it a stronger person. Why? Because your here now! So aspire to make 2016 the year you go for your dreams and let go of your insecurity! I know i’ll be doing the same! 💖