I just watched Phil's liveshow bc I missed it (I always do, it's really not a convenient time for me smh)so if you have any thoughts to share or analyses to make or whatever you want about it I'm all for it?? I love reading what you write so much omg
omg, bless you, that’s so kind and yes–i was left with a few central thoughts after this live show!!! to largely echo my overall reaction to dan’s one from two days ago, this show had me feeling very warm and uplifted by the end. but unlike dan’s live shows, this is how phil’s generally always leave me feeling. he is so good at making the viewer believe that they are almost being invited right into his lounge to chill with him while he just has a few chats about whatever’s on his mind. he’s obviously got a naturally calming voice, and he does his little soft giggles every few minutes, and just,,, so many of phil’s mannerisms and behaviors seem perfectly concocted to make the people viewing him feel at ease. in short, this was just a very classic, traditional phil live show. it didn’t feel like a noticeable shift in his behavior the way that dan’s last two live shows felt. in fact it felt like he came into the show with a pre-determined list of topics to discuss (a format to follow, so to speak) and he was moving down that list in a casual but controlled way (e.g. he knew he wanted to do a christmas haul and therefore set out all of the xmas gifts that he didn’t share in the amazingphil video out on his table.) i think that this almost-paradox is what always strikes me as so fascinating about phil–the way that he can come across as so natural and gentle and calm while at the same time sticking to a more overarching script of sorts. he’s become so talented at it over the years. within this format though we still got some pretty noteworthy insights including:
1. social awkwardness is not just a dan trait. i loved when phil was talking about the gas men looking at his clumps of hair and his feeling too awkward to just tell them he had a hair cut. like. that is straight out of a danecdote or a reasons why dan’s a fail and it made me smile so much. i think phil is often and inaccurately characterized as being more confident in social settings, especially in comparison to dan, and i frequently see people assert that he is social where dan is not. but i have always felt that phil is incredibly shy and reserved and even nervous/anxious in social situations. he has so many clear nervous tics that appear when he’s talking to people he doesn’t know very well. i think that he simply feels an obligation to socialize and make pleasant small talk where dan can’t be bothered. in any case, the anecdote about the hair was great and just reaffirmed this belief for me. and also … can’t believe he and fabrice have upped their relationship to the next level and now fabrice cuts phil’s hair at their house. damn. that is trust.
2. dan and phil dog is canceled. i’m heartbroken. he reiterated that he’s too busy for a dog and can’t adopt one now or in the near future but that he’d like one at some point. interestingly he stayed well clear of saying “we” or “us” or anything else that could implicate dan in those adoption plans. in fact this was true of the whole live show in general. i received a lot of messages asking me to discuss why i think phil says “i” and “me” so much even when explaining experiences that we know he shared with dan, and to contrast this with dan’s reliance on the collective “we” for basically everything. while i have noticed that, overall, phil does say “we” less frequently than dan, i usually think he strikes an even balance between “i” and “we” (whereas dan always errs on the side of talking about both of them in basically every anecdote he shares). but this live show felt different and in fact seemed like phil was trying to go for absolutely zero “we” mentions at all, and i found that really odd. i don’t think it necessarily means anything? i wanted to say that it is just another way in which phil subtly views these live shows as a formal/work thing, a youtube thing so to speak, rather than genuinely approaching it as he would a casual chat with a friend. and as such, he’s gonna answer things in the capacity of himself as a public figure rather than himself as a regular dude who shares everything in life w his partner. but idk if that explanation actually holds up because in phil’s actual youtube videos which are obviously much more formal than a live show, he seems to casually mention dan a fair bit?? even when the situation really doesn’t call for it. in today’s video for example, he brings up the gas leak with a non-contextualized “we” and then he even makes a “phil is on fire” joke? and he mentions dan in nearly every video even the ones that dan isn’t in. so i’m honestly not sure what the deal is with this. could be that phil just hasn’t internalized speaking in the collective as much as dan and idk if that has any deeper meaning. the field is wide open for theories i guess?
3. 2017 goals–especially the Mysterious Creative Project that is brewing in his mind. i don’t have any clue what this could be as phil’s creativity could take him literally anywhere. i honestly can see him doing anything from writing a novel to becoming an abstract painter. but of course, i’m quite certain it’ll be a video (maybe a series?) and i’m so excited that he’s ostensibly challenged himself to push beyond the creative boundaries that he’s kind of locked himself into with his current amazingphil ~brand~ (also truly shocked and appalled that he likes running and my heart melted when he said a central goal was to visit his family more. the lesters continue to be the most close-knit family i’ve ever heard of)
4. on that note, dan’s mum mention. wtf. this was so unexpected bc like,, dan himself hardly ever mentions his mum in any capacity so to hear phil casually bring her up for an entirely unprompted story was sooo interesting to me. as in, the story was something he definitely did not need to tell us, and if they really had any kind of understanding about keeping dan family mentions to a bare minimum, this seemed to shatter it lol. not that i really thought they did, but i do admit to having thought that maybe dan and his parents aren’t close enough for there to ever really be stories to share about them. it was so nice to hear a refutation of that to some degree. dan’s mum is at least close enough to him that she thought to share this dream with dan and also dreamed about phil lmao (i honestly feel creepy writing this and idk why since phil happily shared this info with us?? look at what years of conditioning can do to us as viewers). idk. it was just very sweet and i hope they all hang out at least once in a while (i’m quite certain they do).
~bonus random notes from while i was watching that i liked a lot bc they just sum up what watching phil is like for me: love the stretch from like 33:30ish to 35ish where he rapidly talks about being in the editing zone then the snow turning to rain then his mum being obsessed w snow and ft’ing/texting him about it then him reassuring someone that it will def snow where they live unless they live in the desert then deciding to google whether it has ever snowed in las vegas bc … naturally. … then an anecdote of him driving through arizona (also, when did that happen? am i just blanking?) and getting buried in snow and stopping in a sketchy cabin??? wtf all in under 2 mins? phil’s brain works like 5x as fast as the average human and i am constantly captivated~