littlebigplanet

OLD ART from 2015 that I’m reposting. Every so often I think about how good the LittleBigPlanet games are. Because boy, are they good.

Especially LittleBigPlanet 2, who had Avalon and Clive. I love how the loud-mouthed, retro-themed science man with the hairy chest would constantly belittle a talking calendar and how that was just a thing that would happen in that universe. But don’t worry, they’re science professionals.

Played LittleBigPlanet with my family tonight for the first time, here are a few of the gems that were said:
  • Dad: Is this game difficult to understand?
  • Mom: Yeah, how many buttons do I have to push?
  • ---
  • Dad: Which character am I, we all look the same?!
  • Me: Stop moving around on the screen and I'll tell you.
  • Mom: Well, which one am I? Am I the one jumping?
  • Me: Stop moving for a sec so I can figure it out.
  • Sister: How do I jump?
  • Me: JUST STOP MOVING.
  • ---
  • Me: Okay this is the tutorial.
  • Dad: What are we about to learn?
  • Me: How to move around and dress your character up.
  • Dad: What about how to jump and kill stuff?
  • Me: That comes later after you master the basics.
  • Dad: That sounds silly, why not just teach everything to me now?
  • Mom: Says the man who once called me asking how to text people on his flip phone.
  • ---
  • Mom: Am I the character with the glasses?
  • Me: That's me.
  • Mom: Am I the character that looks like an angel?
  • Me: That's your daughter.
  • Mom: I'm not the ugly skeleton looking dude, am I?
  • Me: That's your husband.
  • ---
  • Me: If you hold the back bumper, you control your arms.
  • Sister: If you flick your control stick, you can punch your friends.
  • Dad: -punches Mom-
  • Mom: -punches Dad-
  • Me: Oh my GOD are we ever going to finish the tutorial.
  • ---
  • Me: We NEED to stay together because whoever is offscreen dies.
  • Me: NO STAY TOGETHER.
  • Me: MOM YOU'RE KILLING EVERYONE.
  • Mom: THAT MEANS I'M WINNING.
  • Me: THIS GAME IS CO-OPERATIVE.
  • ---
  • Dad: Why do I keep disappearing?
  • Me: You keep dying.
  • Dad: How do I not do that?
  • Me: BY STAYING WITH ME.
  • ---
  • Dad: -dies-
  • Me: The spikes kill you if you touch them.
  • Dad: You should warn us of dangers BEFORE we get to them.
  • Me: SORRY, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT I HAD TO TELL YOU THAT IF YOU FALL ON SPIKES YOU DIE.
  • Me: THAT'S LIKE, DARWINISM AT IT'S FINEST.
  • ---
  • Sister: If you choose a sticker you like, you can use the X button to place it everywhere you like. Even on each other.
  • Me: Stop teaching them things that get us killed.
  • ---
  • Dad: Is that an enemy?
  • Me: No, that's a rock.
  • Dad: Is THAT an enemy?
  • Me: That's me.
  • Dad: What about this?
  • Me: The ghost? The ghost that just killed you? No, not an enemy.
  • ---
  • Mom: What's the giant boot do?
  • Mom: Oh.
  • Mom: It kills you, if anyone wants to know.
  • ---
  • Dad: Do you keep leaving me behind because I'm a liability?
  • Everyone: Yes.
  • ---
  • Me: We got through all the tutorial levels, this is the end screen, where it gives us our scores.
  • Mom: So we won?
  • Me: Yeah.
  • Mom: Are we done?
  • Me: No.
  • Mom: I need a drink.
  • ---
  • Dad: How are you hugging me? That's a cool function.
  • Dad: Is there a button that I can kiss my wife with?
  • Sister: I wanna be done.
  • ---
  • Me: I remember why we don't do family game night anymore.
  • Mom: We could always play a board or card game.
  • Me: I don't think I wanna play anything again ever after that.