little jelly

ok this my list of hoe tips and life tips in general

- can’t get ur pussy smooth?? always prickly?? shave diagonally and horizontally instead of up and down, and always use a new blade

- can’t get ur pussy soft?? shave with hair conditioner and massage it in for like 30 seconds before. after u shave, massage with baby oil, and lotion after a shower

- EXFOLIATE. exfoliating is the key to life. mix used coffee grounds with a moisturizing oil (olive or coconut is best). rub that shit all over your legs before you shave until ur hands start to feel funny

- dry feet?? bih me too. rub a fuck ton of regular lotion (or foot cream if u fancy, even Vaseline works) all over your feet and put double socks (or fuzzy socks) on before bed. yass

- this one is the most basic but pls drink water. it’ll clear ur skin, flush out your kidneys to prevent bladder infections, and ur pussy gonna be wet asf

- salt, fat, caffeine, dairy, etc. r gonna make u taste all funky down there. fruits, veggies, and anything w high water content is gonna make u taste fresh/sweet

- smoking and drinking also gonna make u taste funky. and smoking is especially bad for u, so put out the cig babe

- using soap on ur pussy gonna fuck up ur pH bad. the vagina is a self cleaning device, and all u need is a really soft washcloth (or even a cotton shirt) and some water, let ur body do ur thing

- if ur used to wearing tampons and that’s what u find comfortable, use a menstrual cup! very sanitary and will save u a TON of money in the long run

- want a natural lip plumper?? mix a lil bit of cinnamon and honey, and gently rub it into your lips w a soft toothbrush n leave it on for a min. slather on some chapstick n ur plump n soft

- BUY A VIBRATOR. please do it. it will save ur fucking life

- cotton panties or no panties sis. ur kitty needs to breathe and cotton/no panties will prevent bacterial and fungal infection

- got hair on ur face? got rough skin? GURL SHAVE IT! wash your face as normal and pat dry, gently run a clean razor over any areas (cheeks, chin, neck). tone and moisturize like a motherfucker. smooth!

- pubic hair is healthy and good and keeps ur vag clean! don’t shave it unless YOU want to, don’t leave that decision up to ur nasty man

- allow urself junk in moderation. it’ll make making healthy choices easier if u allow urself a little treat every once in a while

- a simple equation for a good meal: vegetable + grain/carb, protein

- do ur fucking homework and do it on time

- rubbing a little bit of petroleum jelly on ur pressure points before spraying perfume will make it last longer

- hair holds onto scents v easily. wanna smell like a goddess????,,, spritz that hair

- kat von d everlasting liquid lipstick is blowjob proof. get messy n be on point!

- urban decay all nighter setting spray is gonna save ur life. it’ll keep ur shit in place when u getting dicked, if u cryin, chokin on dick, w/e u like to do

- if ur having trouble getting wet even after sufficient foreplay, a little bit of water based lube does WONDERS. also won’t deteriorate condoms (oil) or get gritty (silicone)

- need to stretch out ur shoes?? fill two ziploc bags with water and put them in ur shoes. put shoes in the freezer until water freezes solid, and dethaw with a hairdryer. especially effective on leather!

- having problems deepthroating? make sure ur throat is in line with ur mouth, if it’s not the dick won’t go down

- can’t deepthroat at all? cover ur teeth with ur top lip and press ur tongue to the roof of ur mouth while he thrusts. 10/10!

- communication w ur partner during sex will make it a trillion million times more satisfying

- frizzy hair? put conditioner on the tips of your hair (nape of the neck and down) and shampoo right on ur scalp. volumizes without frizzing!

- this one kinda weird but don’t hold ur pee unless u wanna mean bladder infection/UTI

- pee after u masturbate please. u never know what can shimmy up ur urethra, even when ur playin w the little man in the sailboat

- keep a pair of spare glasses with u for when ur contacts dry out. lifesaver

- always keep extra undies, an extra shirt, makeup remover, moisturizer, and comfy shoes in ur car/bag if u can fit all of it

- apply dry shampoo the night before ur gonna need it. it’ll soak up the oil before it sits on ur hair. reapply in the morning n style accordingly

- apple cider vinegar mixed with water works as a good toner if u ain’t got no moneyyyy

- castor oil on ur brows and lashes every night will make them thicker and longer. even just one day will help (bc they will be shiny and moisturized)

ill probs add onto this when i think of more!

Slytherin x Hufflepuff

- first of all, the slytherin

- the biggest social outcast ever

- that “end of second semester” mood, but all the time

- and the hufflepuff would be the happiest little jelly bean

- they’re the last people anyone expected to get together

- it takes a little time but eventually ppl are so used to it they would actually die if they ever broke up

- slytherin always acts so tough but they cry around hufflepuff

- and hufflepuff is so protective of their slytherin like an angry little hedgehog

- they’re always together, hufflepuff dragging slytherin’s ass to parties and quidditch matches

- “it’ll be fun!”

- “no”

- “please?” *puppy eyes*

- *giving up* “fuck you”

- pillow fights

- eating ice cream and hufflepuff getting a brain freeze and looking so adorable slytherin can feel them self falling for them

- slytherin dropping things on purpose just so they check out hufflepuff

- and hufflepuff knows it

- “[slytherin], I want to take our relationship to the next level”

- “um..”

- “I want to raise a house plant with you!”

- just the most pure, cute relationship ever that no one understands but everyone is jealous of

Lost And Then Found — Ted E. Bear’s Grand Aquarium Adventure

Late one afternoon, Security Officers Sylvia and Kevin found a lost teddy bear belonging to a visiting school. After locating the owners, they took him on a tour of the Aquarium to pass the time before he could be returned. Here is the tale of Ted E Bear’s Grand Aquarium Adventure.

Don’t worry, don’t panic. This has happened before.

Yep—I’m just here by myself, alone on the floor.
I guess things aren’t fine, since no adieu was truly bid…
Oh my goodness, my gracious, just where is my kid?!

Maybe the teacher brought everyone back to the kelp?
Nope, nobody. OK, uh—yeah, I may need a little help.

Excuse me coral, apologies, I don’t mean to vent
But perhaps you know where exactly my kid went?

I guess I’ll just finish the visit on my own, that’s not so bad.
When you’re happy as a clam there’s no reason to be sad.

*Sniff* No, this really isn’t fun to be alone with the fish!
I want to find my kid! Please, I just have this simple wish!

- Hey little buddy! Aw—are you lost my dear?
- Yes! I can’t find my kid! I’m alone forever I fear!
- What’s your name? We’re Kevin and Sylvia and we care.
- Thank you so much for your help. My name’s Ted E. Bear.

- Not to worry, helping you get unlost is part of our job!
- Really? Oh wow, oh thank you—you’re most—oh *SOB!*

There there Mr. Bear we’ll find your kid, post haste!
Now let’s make sure your visit doesn’t go to waste!

- Check it out, I helped raise this little purple-striped jelly!
- Wow, it’s really beautiful—awesome job there Tommy!
- Want to give it a shot? I’ll bet you’re great at animal care.
- Wow, I don’t think I could—I’m just a little plush bear!

- Nonsense, you got this. Here’s a scraper—it’s all in the wrist!
- How’s that?
- Perfect! Look at you—you’re a budding jelly Aquarist!

- Whoa, what’s this class—I get to feed the fishes?!
- Yep! But to pass, you’ll need to wash the dishes!

- The control room is cool!
- You’re eating it up like a glutton!
- What’s this switch here?
- DON’T TOUCH THE RED BUTTON!

- Want to help us greet our guests—Jasmine needs an intern!
- Oh wow, a job at the Aquarium—it will be so much fun to learn!

Learn… Where do I remember hearing that word… SCHOOL!
My kid! I have to get back! But… working here would be so cool!

Oh me, oh my—I really want to help conserve the great blue sea!
And… being there for my kid is the way for me to fulfill my destiny!

- OK, let’s find my school—what assistance can I show?
- Oh, we already found them.
- Really, when?!
- About 8 hours ago.

- Well, then let’s get this show on the road!
Box me up, make sure I’m safe and stowed!
- Can do Ted E! We wish you the best on your journey!
Thanks for stopping by, say hello to your school family!

Dear Sylvia and Kevin, 
I made it back to class safe and sound.
The teachers were so happy to tell the kids I had been found.
Thanks for teaching me to find my dreams and in my heart carry ‘em.
Much love from your Beary-best friend, Ted- E, to the Monterey Bay Aquarium!

Thanks so much to Ms. Bizon’s class and the Sea Breeze School in Foster City for letting us host Ted E for the day—albeit accidentally! We hope to sea him again soon!

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got7.with.Igot7: 형과_동생의_온도차이_1.mp4
#1분갓유겸 #댄스본능 #운동본능 #GOT7 #갓세븐 #유겸 #진영

LMAFO jinyoung is TIREDT😂😂

Can we just take a moment to appreciate our tall bean? Junhong works so hard to grow and develop as an artist, staying up late in the night working on music and practicing his dance and rap, he worries and stresses so often about never being good enough, and he lets us in on the constantly turmoil he’s in from the stress of it all. Zelo debuted as a 15 year old who had been constantly told he’d never be good enough, who was so insecure of his chin that he’d wear masks constantly for almost a year straight just to hide it, who hadn’t even finished middle school when he was first put on stage. He grew up in front of us, and he grew up well, into someone whose respectful, kind, and open. Someone who despite being talked over, ignored, or brushed off and despite all the harsh feelings inside him, brings lightness and silliness into everything he does. I feel like we don’t spend enough time loving and being proud of our tall bean, let’s add a little more jelly-love to our conversations

Jelly Beans

Summary: A cute little Chris Evans x Reader where you have just one thing missing, and you attempt to make it fall into place to create a picture-perfect life. Who knew having kids with the love of your life would be so perfect?
Warnings: light smut (unprotected sex), lots of fluffiness
Word count: 1165
A/N: I would complain about this whole thing popping into my head during the time where I should be studying but I’d never say no to a cute fluffy fic. This was inspired by one of @emilyevanston​‘s adorable headcanons!

Originally posted by nerdofallfandoms


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