• Nightcrawler: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life.
  • Professor X: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back.
  • Mystique: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this.
  • Wolverine: My will to live! I haven't seen this in 15 years!
  • Jean: I knew I lost that potential somewhere!
  • Magneto: Mental stability, my old friend!
  • Nightcrawler: Guys, could you lighten up a little?
Jokes are efficient things and they must be as carefully constructed as mouse traps. And so for me to write a page of a novel is a very slow business, because the whole thing has to be rigged in order to snap at the end. My books are essentially mosaics, thousands and thousands of tiny little chips all glued together, and each chip is this thing I learned to do—this thing I learned to make as a child—which is a little joke.
—  Kurt Vonnegut to Frank McLaughlin. Media and Methods. May 1973.
The Mall

Originally posted by hardyness

Kurt Wagner x Reader

The Mall

Author: Morgan


Warnings: None?

Jubilation Lee knew how to have a good time. So naturally, when she invited you to the mall with Jean and a few of the new kids, naturally you had oblidged. You loved the mall anyway, but Jubilee was just a blast. The cute new guy from Germany was a bonus.

God, what a cutie. So sweet and nice, not to mention the accent. Jean smiled as you slid into the back seat of the car beside the blue mutant. Scott turned up the radio as the five of you made your escape in Charles’ borrowed (stolen) vehicle.

First things first upon entering the mall, Jubilee dragged all of you into the nearest clothing store. She insisted Kurt change into something more fashionable. And if Jubilee knew anything, she knew fashion. Kurt stood beside idly, watching the four of you piece together a new outfit for him. His tail swayed behind him curiously. He liked this. He liked shopping, and he liked having friends.

You held up a bright red jacket. It looked like it had fallen out of a Michael Jackson music video.

“How’s this?” you asked. Jubilee admired the jacket.

“Kurt, try this on.” Jubilee called him over. “With these.” She handed him jeans and a plain black t-shirt.

“Okay. Danke,” he bamfed into a dressing room, emerging a few minutes later dressed like any other American teenager would.  

“Spin.” Jubilee motioned in a circle and Kurt turned around. A proud grin tugged at your lips. He looked good. “I like it.”

The four of you chipped in a few bucks for the clothes and then you rode the elevator up to the second floor to the arcade. You slid a quarter into the Pacman machine and set to work, winding through the maze and avoiding the ghosts. Kurt was set up at the machine next to you, managing two games at once. One with his hands and the other with his tail.

“That’s so cool, Kurt!” you told him. “How does it function? Like how do you control it?”

“It’s like having anozher arm.” Kurt explained. “I control it as easily as you control your hands.”

“That’s really, really cool.” You smiled, focusing on the machine. You moved the joystick back and forth, weaving through the electronic maze. “All I can do is heal people.”

“Zhat sounds like an amazing gift.” Kurt grinned.


“Yeah.” he nodded, a charismatic grin tugging at his lips. “I do have a tail zhough, so I zhink I win.”

“Yeah I think so too,” you chuckled, giving him a playful nudge. He nudged you back, and so it became competitive, nudging eachother until one of you messed up and lost. The racing game Kurt had been playing with his tail was long forgotten, and you hardly noticed that his tail had coiled around your waist. In fact, you didn’t notice until the group met up outside the arcade after half an hour or so.

“Um…?” Scott motioned to Kurt’s tail, still secured around your hips.

“Oh!” you noticed, smiling. Kurt unwound it as fast as he could, a look of apology on his face. His amber eyes searched yours for forgiveness, as though he had done something wrong.

“I’m so sorry! Sometimes it has a mind of its own, and I didn’t mean to creep you out or-”

“Kurt, it’s fine. I promise. No harm done,” you assured the tall blue mutant.

“Are…are you sure?”


“Okay.” he nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” you repeated, smiling. Jean peered into each of your minds. She knew there was a connection there, and as she would bet with Scott later, she figured you’d end up together in less than a month.

Next, the crew went to the food court to get Slushees. Kurt took a large sip of his cold drink before you could warn him otherwise and clutched his head, yelling out in pain.

“Aah! Somezhing’s wrong!”

“It’s called a brain freeze.” Scott told him, leaning forward.

“Vhat?! I froze my brain?!”

“Yeah.” Scott nodded. You set down your drink and scooted towards Kurt a little. His face was still scrunched up in pain.

“Come here,” you told him. He leaned towards you. You pressed your hand to his forehead, focusing warm energy towards him. He let out a little hum, eyes rolling back in his head as you got rid of the pain.


“No prob.” you shrugged.

“Mom friend,” Jubilee teased with a smile.

“Is that a bad thing?” you smirked, taking a sip from your drink.

“Mom friend?” Kurt asked.

“It means she takes care of everybody.” Jean explained. “Getting extra napkins and tissues, sneaking food into the movie theater, fixing collars, tucking in tags…”

“Comes with being a healer, I guess.”

Kurt’s fangs poked out as he smiled at the concept. A mom friend.

After hanging out in the food court for a while, Scott, Jubilee, and Jean wandered off to the record store. Kurt agreed to come with you to the Nike store to get shoes. You needed new sneakers for school, and he insisted on accompanying. He didn’t want you to be alone. You appreciated the gesture.

Kurt stood near the wall display at the front of the store while you retrieved your shoes from the back of the store. He looked up at the tall wall of shoes. There were so many in all sorts of sizes and colors and styles. He never really wore shoes, what with his abnormal feet and all.

“That guy your friend?” asked one of the girls in the store. You nodded.


“Where’s he from?”

“Germany.” you smiled. She nodded.


“Met him today. He’s a sweetie.”

“I can tell.” the girl smiled. You liked the teens at the mall. None of them seemed to mind that you and your friends weren’t exactly normal. They were cool with it. It was usually in adults that you found problems.

“Did you find zhem?” Kurt appeared in front of you in a puff of smoke. You coughed, nodding.

“I forgot you could do that.” You chuckled, leading him up to the register to check out. After you left the Nike store, you met up with the others. You had all planned to see Star Wars at 1, but Kurt wanted to watch the break dancers. He watched a few before trying his hand at it.

He moved robotically, popping and locking like you had never seen before. He was amazing. Of course, he could spin on his tail which was pretty cool too. You rooted him on with the others. God, he could move.

“How vhas zhat?”

“That was awesome Kurt! You killed it!”

“Danke,” he smiled.

“Come on guys! We don’t want to miss Star Wars,” Jubilee dragged you all along as the group gushed over Kurt’s awesome skills.

You ended up sitting between Kurt and Jean, and sometime during the movie, Kurt’s tail wound around your leg. You scooted a bit closer to him, fingertips grazing over the blue skin of his one of his three-fingered hands. He smiled. So did you.

By the time you and the others got out of the theater, Kurt wasn’t concerned over the mild argument over which Star Wars movie was better. All he cared about was the fact that your hand was still wrapped tightly with his own and that his tail was comfortably coiled around your waist.

“I Saw the Signs” - Kurt/Blaine

anon asked: “ Can you write a little something-something post 3x05 where Santana or someone can tell Kurt and Blaine had sex and is totally loving embarrassing them about it xD“

excellent prompt but Santana is not embarrassing enough

how about 1400 words of post-”The First Time” Hudmel family shenanigans :P

read on AO3

Burt sits at the kitchen table, flipping through the morning paper. There’s already a review of McKinley’s production of West Side Story in the arts section. Admittedly, Burt would normally pull this area out of the paper without reading it and set it aside for Kurt, but on this particular morning, there’s a big, grainy picture of Blaine and Rachel at the top of the column. The columnist gushes relentlessly about the perfect casting, particularly spotlighting the “incredibly talented” romantic leads and musing about their possible real-life connection. Burt can’t help but feel a swell of pride, here; Rachel and Blaine are family, and watching them already doing well in their chosen field is a real treat.

He muses, just for a moment, with a wistful little grin on his face, that those two will be legal family someday, if his sons get their way.

Burt looks up at the sound of soft footsteps padding down the stairs. It’s Kurt, looking a bit more disheveled than Burt’s used to seeing him in the mornings; his hair is a mess, and instead of his usual muted pajamas, he’s in a bright red Dalton Athletics t-shirt that’s pretty snug on him.


Keep reading

The Alpha

Prompt: Please write something where the reader is a shape shifter and Hugh is sent on a mission to find her. Could you please add Kurt Wagner as well?

Characters: Wolverine x Wolf!Reader x (little bit Kurt Wagner)

Words: 900+

Originally posted by johnwatsonfalls

You felt a sharp pain in your stomach and turned your head to look, an arrow, you heard some men come running after you, hunters, you thought and quickly started running in the direction of the barn that you’d stayed at the past couple of weeks. You squeezed yourself through the hole in the barn door and felt that you would have to focus on everything else than the pain that the arrow was causing you. 

Keep reading


Jealous Kurt

Kurt x reader


Originally posted by extraordinaryxmen

The pair of you often received looks when you were out together, varying from, curiosity to pity all the way through to disgust, it wasn’t something that really bothered Kurt too much anymore, after all he had lived his entire life this way, it wasn’t exactly a new thing for him, but it never failed to break his heart a little, each time they were aimed at y/n. She certainly didn’t deserve such treatment, but after months of reassurance y/n had managed to convince him that the occasional stare could never dampen the joy that she felt when she was with him.

Kurt reminded himself of this as the pair continued their peaceful stroll to the cosy restaurant, not too far from their home. Sensing his unease, y/n gave his three fingered hand a light squeeze, he offered her a slight smirk in return, before opening the door for her.

“table for two?’ the greeter asked as they approached the waiting area, ‘yes, thank you’ Kurt answered politely, before they were lead to a table, where a waiter pulled out y/n’s chair, as Kurt was going to the same. Kurt shook off his slight twinge of annoyance, settling himself down, and offering his lovely date a smile, allowing the points of his teeth to poke free, from his full blue lips, over the top of his menu.

The waiter soon returned, placing a long fingered hand on y/n’s shoulder while she placed her order, that same spark of annoyance mixed with a drop of putrid green jealously grew in kurts chest, as the undeniably attractive waiter flirted shamelessly with his partner, despite y/n reaching her delicate hand out to find kurts on top of the table, placing her hand over his.

Eventually he took his leave, sending a wink over his shoulder, which only added to the foul potion currently brewing in kurts chest. Y/n began stroking patterns on his hand, ‘are you alright sweetheart?’ he asked, his thick accent full of concern, at the sadness in her usual bright eyes. “oh, sorry, that waiter just made me feel a bit uncomfortable, I know I’m being silly.’ She murmured, Kurt furrowed his brow, ‘you’ve got nothing to apologize for darling, he was being inappropriate.’ He exclaimed slightly louder than he had intended, a light lavender blush spreading across his cheeks, as he checked over his shoulder to see if anybody else heard. Thankfully the members of staff were either chattering amongst themselves or bustling about, clearing tables.

Y/n gave him a light giggle at his actions, a welcome sound to kurts pointed ears. The pair chatted amicably, their hands still together, as they waited for their food.

The food arrived without much incident, aside from a slightly husky ‘enjoy’ from the waiter. The food was mouth-watering, perfectly prepared pasta carbonara, with deliciously creamy sauce.

After the couple had just about licked their plates clean, the waiter rather quickly reappeared asking a little too suggestively for kurts liking if y/n would like anything else, or if she was ready to go home.

Kurt desperately tried to push his jealousy down, gritting his teeth as he ground out a ‘no thank you, just the bill please.’ The waiter seemed to have finally pieced together that the pair were a couple when he came back to give them their bill, noticing kurts blue hand clasping y/n’s.

“you could do so much better, a pretty little thing like you with a freak like him’ he snorted maliciously, Kurt just about leapt out of his seat, drawing himself up to his full height, barring his pointed teeth and letting out a low growl, only for y/n to step between them, after calmly placing the money on the table.

“theirs nobody better than this gentleman, thank you for the meal, it was lovely, though I think you could improve on the treatment of your customers.’ Her voice was deadly calm, and was uttered with a threatening smirk on her beautiful face, before she took kurts hand, and walked proudly out of the restaurant together.


Have a great day and be safe