literally facepalming

i’m dying @ the mental image of sportacus and robbie’s wedding, where stephanie and trixie are flower girls, pixel and ziggy are best men (even though they can’t technically be legal witnesses but try telling two children that) and, against all logic and better judgement, stingy is the ringbearer

which leads to, at the Big Moment when they’re supposed to exchange rings, stingy just goes “these rings are mine!!!”

robbie literally facepalms while sportacus has to be the responsible one, crouch down and explain to stingy that these are wedding rings, he can’t have them if he has no one to marry, and can we please have them back so we can married properly now? 

Jungkook as your boyfriend

Originally posted by jinkooks

  • k if you get to date jungkook you are the luckiest thing on earth because who doesn’t want to date that nerd
  • so he would be extremely nervous before confessing because he wouldn’t just go to a random someone he found cute and ask them out oh no no he would totally fall for a best friend
  • and guess what you are the best friend
  • and the nerd didn’t even realise he liked you in the first place he was literally just like “huh hyung aren’t they amazing if i’d date someone i wish it would be them”
  • and jin is literally facepalming for the fifth time because “jungkook maybe u CAN date them just ask”
  • but kook is like “wait no i can’t hyung we are best friends are you dumb or something”
  • but then something clicks in his head or jin is hitting his head bc kook’s stupid af and you turn around and smile at him and he just realises
  • he just knows he already fell for you
  • and then he nearly faints
  • but yeah back to it he decides to confess after some weeks or months idk he’s pretty much a loser
  • so what better way to confess than write a message because he is still a loser and he knows that if he talks to you he’s gonna screw it all up
  • so here’s the thing, being your best friend, kook doesn’t really write you messages and even when he does they are short because he knows you won’t get mad
  • but he literally stood all night up to write a long ass message before sending it at like 7 am
  • you still don’t know that he worked so much at that message but namjoon is forever blackmailing kook with it
  • woah this backstory is long af
  • anyway badabing badaboom you two are together because you actually had a crush on him who wouldn’t have a crush on jungkook
  • he still doesn’t like texting but he tries to send you morning texts and good night texts
  • you also get to wear his white t-shirts and he complains about it but he finds you sexy when you wear his clothes so he lets you wear them anyway
  • you two watch the marvel movies and you secretly like iron man too but you say that captain america is better just to annoy kook
  • alright back to the story
  • so jungkookie wouldn’t be big on skinship at first
  • he would be afraid to hold your hand
  • so when he does hold your hand he just internal screams and is like “good job kook you did good”
  • but then he regrets everything because his hands get sweaty so he immediately tries to find a context to stop holding your hand
  • he is also afraid to kiss you
  • and when the boys see that none of you is taking initiative on kissing they come up with a plan
  • so they play the pepero game
  • and yeah, taehyung and hobi kiss again and jimin gets slapped by yoongi bc they kissed but it’s all worth it when they shove both your heads into one another to see you kiss
  • and this is the story of your first kiss
  • jungkook likes hugs though
  • he would hug you 24/7 if he had the time
  • he gives good hugs too like he likes to hover over you if you are shorter or snuggle his head into your neck if you are tall enough
  • I’M LITERALLY MELTING WEHY AM I DOING THIS TO MYSELF
  • he would also like cuddling, especially spooning
  • but he would love to be the big spoon, even if you are 6 feet tall he. is. going. to. hold. his. baby.
  • and you can’t do anything about it
  • he still whines about his arm being numb after you two get up and he denies ever wanting to be the big spoon so you are still the bad one
  • after he gets comfortable enough with you he would start making out with you
  • and BOI would he love making out yes he would
  • he’d be pretty good at it too like he would love to hover over you while you two kissed (he would also dominate the kiss he’s a dom fiGHT ME)
  • he’d put a hand around your waist if you were standing and he would gather your hands over your head if you were sitting
  • he loves when you straddle him but he will never ever ever tell you
  • he also gives good neck kisses
  • he would pepper close mouthed kisses over your neck and they would be so light you would barely feel them
  • and when he gets to your collar bone you think he’s done buT HE GOES BACk to your neck and just bites
  • he bites
  • and then he starts to sloppily kiss all over your neck and he starts biting and sucking and licking everywhere he can reach and he gives you s o many hickeys and god forbid you hide them nope you gotta go out with your neck fucked up i’m sorry you got no choice
  • and he gets so smug and proud when people point out your hickeys or bruises and he smirks and he just w i n k s at you when you look over
  • but this fucker would headbutt you into your nose if you gave him one faint faint pale hickey
  • so yeah i guess you found out that your sex life is pretty interesting
  • of course, if you are ok with sex bc if you are not jungkook is still a happy bean
  • SMUT AHEAD PLZ DON’T CONTINUE IF YOU ARE NOT OK WITH IT I WILL WRITE SOMETHING IN BOLD WHEN I FINISH IT
  • k so i already said that jungkook is a dom and i will forever support this statement with my whole heart
  • anyway, the first time he wouldn’t be as confident as he was with making out
  • bc apparently making love is different
  • and he’s scared of hurting you
  • so you have to take the wheel
  • and your first time is gentle and cute and somehow awkward but you enjoyed it nevertheless because jungkook kept on repeating praises and he also left those heavenly moans out
  • spoiler: after the first three times kook flips you two over and fucks you into oblivion
  • another spoiler: you never get to dom ever again
  • from then on it just gets wilder and wilder
  • i don’t really see him into dirty talk but i actually see him into dirty talk???
  • like i don’t think he will dirty talk every time but if you get him angry enough he will get into lowkey humiliation mode
  • sometimes calls you slut but apologizes for it 50 times after it’s all over
  • will never ever do anything that will hurt you because he may be a dom but he’s not going to ever hurt you so u are in good hands
  • a big one on fingering i dunno i don’t see him eating you out but he’ll finger you at any hour every day he’d finger you hours on no end if you would let him
  • also loves fucking your mouth if you are ok with it but still apologizes for it 10 times
  • spoiler: if you let him fuck your mouth then he will totally do it and if you gag or struggle he will chuckle and be like “come on, you can take more than that” and just continue. feels bad for it later
  • anyway, if you look uncomfortable with something or you look like you just can’t anymore he will stop because he doesn’t want to push you past your limits
  • and apologize again like 70 times because he is good at apologizing
  • K THAT’S IT NO MORE SMUT
  • if you guys ever fight he will be s o scared but only after it’s over and one of you walks away
  • i mean, he gets into it and he is pretty competitive so when you fight he wants to show you that he is right even if he isn’t
  • so he doesn’t notice that what you two do is bad only after you walk away
  • so he gets very very scared and he’s !!! “hyUNG WHAT DO I DO THEY LEFT”
  • and jin is like “calm down kid they’ll come back i promise”
  • and you do come back and jungkook is in literal tears his cheeks are all puffed out and his eyes are red and his lips are even redder and he looks like he can’t breathe anymore and he just clings to you and he repeats “please never leave me alone don’t ever walk away like this please i’ll do everything let’s just never fight i don’t like it” and he is ugly sobbing and whining so you just hug him and cuddle him and wipe away his tears and you can’t even remember why you fought in the first place
  • that was your first fight so after that one jungkook avoids the fights like the plague
  • if you guys start fighting he drops everything and hugs you very very tight because he is scared you will walk away again so he sits you down somewhere and he sits right next to you so your legs and arms touch because he needs to know you are there 
  • and you two just talk and never fight again
  • he also gets you little cute presents because “i just saw it there and it reminded me of you so i just bought it”
  • so your room is full of little things from jungkook because he doesn’t really like presents but will forever buy you stuff because he highkey likes to spoil you
  • you are so spoiled istg the only time he doesn’t spoil you is when you say “why do you spoil me” and he just denies everything
  • he is totally whipped but he doesn’t acknowledge it
  • and you guys tease each other every day and every time people see you together you bicker but at the end of the day you are still his and he is still yours
  • he knows he can trust you so WAIT NOPE I FORGOT TO SAY SOMETHING IT’S NOT ENDING YET
  • he is so jealous
  • i mean, it’s not that he doesn’t trust you, because he does, but when he sees other men around you he just goes on protective mode
  • the problem is he doesn’t know how to react when he feels like this so every time it’s different
  • one time he pulls you away, one time he joins the conversation, one time he just says something salty to the other person and forcefully grabs you and takes you somewhere else
  • actually, it’s always different with jungkook, whatever you guys are doing, be it dates (sometimes you go to a cafe, the next time you go to the gym and sometimes he takes you to the zoo or a carnival), or kisses (he will forever kiss you in a new way, two kisses will never be the same) or even talk (you guys will never talk about the same thing twice)
  • and that is because he knows he doesn’t know what to do so he wants to make sure that you are still interested in him and still love him and he’s forever afraid that he might screw up so he tries his best because you are honestly the world for him and he doesn’t want to lose his sun and moon and stars
  • because you make him feel things he never felt before and you are his only source of calmness and peace when everyone is stressing him and only your scent can relax him
  • and he knows he can trust you because you have been there before he even knew who he was. you were always there to remind him why he is wonderful and why he is doing what he is doing and you always supported him through his darkest times. you always protected him and he didn’t even know
  • so now he is forever grateful for what you’ve done for him and he wants to do so too. he wants to be there for you and he wants you to cry on his shoulder, not on someone else’s. he wants to be the reason you smile and he wants to protect you and he wants to remind you why you are breathtaking
  • he just adores you and everything about you and he still can’t comprehend why you love him the way he loves you and every night he has to remind himself that you are his, that you are there for him and that you are ok with it
  • so your relationship is more than bickering and presents
  • because jungkook is way deeper than he shows and he is a person that feels everything so very deeply and sometimes he is afraid of his own feelings and this is why he needs you to show him that you feel the same way and that he isn’t crazy or something
  • your relationship is one where you aren’t just lovers, but best friends too, which means that you know everything about each other, but are still eager to absorb everything that means the other’s existence
  • your relationship is built on sleepless nights where you just stare at each other and warm blankets and 3 am dinners and soft shy kisses and sweaty hands even after years of being together and mistakes because they are always there but you two learn to overcome them and he wouldn’t have it any other way
  • this got very long

Originally posted by bangtannoonas

so the other day i was thinking about a hollstein youtubers AU where laura is a youtuber and all her viewers know she’s dating carmilla, who just lounges around in the background all the time, and sometimes laura will turn around and ask carm a question and she’ll casually answer back, and everything is domestic and wonderful

and then i realized that that’s literally the actual show.

8

ASTRO as cinnamon rolls [x]

supernaturallymarvellous  asked:

Something funny: how about the time that I was flirting with a guy on the bus and my stop was the next one. So I get off the bus, putting a little bit of extra wiggle in my hips. I glance back and he's watching me with a smile on his face......only for me to then step in a massive puddle and one of my shoes fell off in it. Literal facepalm moment but funny as hell....!

Oh my god!! That totally sounds like something I would do!! Thank you for this!! 💜