lisa-diamond

lesbrary  asked:

Thanks for your posts about Ramona Blue. As someone who identified as a lesbian for over a decade before unexpectedly falling for a guy friend, it means a lot to me. It's like: I'm sorry my lived experience wasn't ideologically pure? And sorry that I ever called myself a lesbian just because I was attracted to women 98% of the time? Sorry that sexuality and romantic attraction doesn't actually obey strict guidelines? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ( Also: highly recommend Sexual Fluidity by Lisa Diamond)

Originally posted by thedis4design

We’ll just be over here being impure but its cool cuz we got the best authors, the best celebrities, and the best snacks.  *fistbump*

- Sarah 

Coming out safely

All the stories of when people realized they were bi naturally led to questions from people who now know they are bi, but have not come out yet. So here is a summary answer.

It depends on how old you are and where you live, and how biphobic your parents are. You may have good reason to be scared, if you live in a very prejudiced part of the country, are still a teen, and your parents are biphobic, as this young man found out. Although people stepped in to help that young man, imagine if no one had. Forty% of homeless youth are LGBT. If you are under 18 and your parents are very prejudiced, I would wait until you are living on your own and supporting yourself to come out to them. This is especially true if you are also likely to be bullied in school because of it - no one has to be a hero. Just try to go to a queer-friendly college, or make sure you get some solid vocational training. When you grow up with people who don’t accept something so basic to who you are, it’s understandable that you might want to act out in self-destructive ways, but try to channel that anger into getting free instead. And being able to support yourself is TRUE freedom.

If your parents won’t assault you/throw you out, and you won’t be bullied at school, but people will just say the usual Bi 101 annoying stuff (over and over and over) when you come out, prepare yourself. Read up on the truth on bisexuality on BiNET USA, BRC, and here. Many people are just ignorant. When they say something like, “Oh, but I thought bisexuality was just a phase!” swallow your anger, and politely say “Why no, actually, a researcher by the name of Lisa Diamond studied bisexuals and showed that it is a stable sexual orientation.” IRL, most of the time, people say, “Oh, I didn’t know that,” and then they are fine, and you are friends. In the more progressive parts of the country, most people are not that hateful. About half of gays and Lesbians won’t DATE a bisexual, so a gay bar can be difficult, but that’s another blog.

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The tutorial for the look is up on my revived blog right now!

check out and comment some of your ideas!

I’d like to see your gal make too!

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http://bunkyodreaming.blogspot.com/2014/02/pink-princess-tutoriall-picture-heavy.html

nytimes.com
The Scientific Quest to Prove Bisexuality Exists

How a new breed of activists is using science to show â&#128;&#148; once and for all â&#128;&#148; that someone can be truly attracted to both a man and a woman.

This article is an absolute must-read about the American Institute of Bisexuality and the important work it does funding academic scientific research of bisexuality that is respectful and well-thought-out.