I like to change liquor stores frequently because the clerks got to know your habits if you went in night and day and bought huge quantities. I could feel them wondering why I wasn’t dead yet and it made me uncomfortable. They probably weren’t thinking any such thing, but then a man gets paranoid when he has 300 hangovers a year.
—  Charles Bukowski, Women
Headcanon that 2p America and 2p Canada-
  • go to junkyards to restore and fix old school cars together
  • can play basketball in a slummy abandoned park for hours
  • are kings of their local skateparks
  • can do a fuck ton of fancy duo-skateboard tricks together
  • do parkour together
  • make 4am liquor store runs together
  • smoke weed together
  • have a complex secret handshake
  • read Playboy magazines together
  • blast hip hop in their room and dance together
  • go to raves together
  • regularly play beer pong together
  • cheat off each other in school 
  • have to yell at each other to study / remember to do other important things
  • are known as the hottest bad boys of their school
  • drive the exact same pickup trucks but in different colors
  • ride motorcycles together and call themselves a biker gang
  • draw dicks on each others’ faces when the other is sleeping
  • are the fucking best of friends but are too stubborn to admit it


  • 2p America free-style raps while 2p Canada beat boxes
  • 2p America breakdances while 2p Canada carries the huge stereo
  • 2p America and 2p Canada’s motto around each other is “bros before hoes”
  • 2p America is Native American and 2p Canada is part Eskimo and they’ll occasionally nerd out about their cultures together