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Let's get personal: accepting the past and letting go

Last year was my first year of college. Going into it, I met a person who I thought would be someone who would stand by me. She had “proposed” living with me for the next four years no matter what, I told her deep things about my past that people didn’t know, I told her things I had currently felt and we would stay up for hours in our room and just talk. Therapy.

Much like other relationships, we kind of grew through experiences (in a short amount of time? I guess?). She got into a relationship, and more classes. We found differences in lifestyle and political stances. Slowly the bond we had somewhat unraveled. We no longer had the long chats, the movie nights, or really … the relationship that we once had. For me, it felt one sided. It became a relationship where I felt like my existence was only valued when something positive in her life was dissolving.

For the longest time, I had this pent up bitterness towards her because I literally felt betrayed. She was once someone I put my trust in, and she had completely screwed it over. When she came to me crying, I was cold. I wouldn’t offer the strong words, and sometimes I’d then go tell it to others because they were fed up with her too. Now looking back, I think my approach was wrong.

I live by this rule that you should love people and treat them with respect even when they want to do you harm. Your love can change them, when nothing else can. However I had made her the exception, and I regret doing that. I watched how much her life changed (somewhat for the worse, in some aspects the better) and I feel as though I should’ve offered better support. She was going through a hard time. The first year is rough for everyone. Actually, all four years is probably hard for anyone. You’re on your own, you face new challenges…. it’s rough. We all were going through stressful things, and sometimes that changes our perspective… how we treat others and things like that. I vaguely talked to her once about how her behavior had harmed me emotionally, and she apologized but kept at it.

Was she in the right to kind of do what she did? Who knows. Was I? I feel like I wasn’t, and I wish I could’ve changed my approach. Does my mistake make me a bad person? Heck, maybe. But you gotta live and learn. You gotta grow, and maybe talk it out in the future.

It’s okay to move on from toxic relationships. It’s okay to talk out problems with people, and it’s okay to grow distant from them. It happens. It important however, to approach these occurrences not as problems but rather a piece of your life journey. That person provided what they had to in that moment of your life and they’re purpose is no longer. It’s okay to move on. It’s okay to grow.

that one scene in every straight movie that basically goes 

straightie named chad: ok im gonna show you something, its called walking across the street, take my hand
straightie named abigail: oh my god chad nooooo! thats so scary
chad: abigail. do you trust me?
abigail: [meaningful sigh] ………..Yes.
chad: okay. take my hand.
abigail, after having crossed the street: oh my god chad that was amazing!!!! 
chad: i cant believe you did that!
abigail: we did that. thank you, chad

NCT get so much hate

Taeyong: Had one scandal that ended up being a misunderstanding but then people began adding rumours about multiple scandals and bullying. Luckily SM and fans disproved this and it’s stopped. He even cried and apologized for things he didn’t do. How could anyone hate him?

Yuta: So what he had chin surgery and maybe a nose job? Do you think your faves haven’t had surgery? I mean most idols have so your fave probably has. It’s normal in Korea and shouldn’t be such a taboo concept.

Winwin: He has had a few comments about his lack of Korean skills and bringing nothing to the group.

Johnny: This boy has been getting so much hate and I didn’t even realize until recently. So, apparently because of his lack of lines in songs and not leading in dance or rap people have been calling him talentless and ugly and recently he didn’t get the same amount of photos as other members at photoshoot and has been told not to talk so much by writers. Let the guy live, he trained almost 10 years for this.

Doyoung: He’s gotten hate for his looks and his talent and everything else. When Johnny and Doyoung joined 127, he was the one that got the most hate and fans demanding he got switched with Hansol. And he’s often called annoying or too determined by ‘fans’.

Taeil:• It’s not so much hate but more him being completely overlooked. I’ve seen ‘fans’ call him useless but apart from that he’s just not appreciated within the fandom enough. Finding Doyoung stans is hard for me but finding Taeil stans is almost impossible. Give this guy some love please.

Haechan: He get hate comments at the beginning for being ugly and knetz attacked him for his skin tone. He was then hated on for his voice being high and irritating and even saw someone say he copied GDragon (I know 😒). Recently, it got worse when he had a rumour that he was dating or talking to a saesang fan and loads of his fansites shut down like the snakes they are. SM and even his own members have been known to give him the cold shoulder (unintentionally on NCT’s part) and he’s only really got the support he deserves this comeback.

Ten: Ten got a lot of hate at the beginning as I remember people who ‘supported’ SMRookies shared the video or him singing ring ding dong and people said some really nasty stuff about him being talentless, ugly, gay (even if he is, not a bad thing but was used as insult etc).

Dream: They’ve faced so many comments about how young they are and people either call them foetus’s and ignore their hardwork and talent or sexualise them. Also, when 'fans’ complained about them getting their first win and said they didn’t deserve it.

NCT 127: People began to complain because the music style was all over the place. Then When 2 members joined people complained about the change in unit and unstanned them.

They’ve all gotten so much hate from the beginning and I don’t understand why. They’re attractive, talented, hardworking and the idea and their music is so good. I just don’t understand how anyone could hate on such a great group of guys (or any idols really).