like what kind of stupid question i thought you were the smart one

A story that may have relevance for others, or then again, maybe not:

When I was in college, about ten or so years ago, I was a history major. I wanted to learn to dance, so I joined a swing dance club on campus. To my surprise, this club had about twice as many men as women (in high school, the last time I’d tried dancing, the ratio had gone the other way–lots of girls, and boys only that you could drag by their ears).

But apparently, there had been some kind of word spread specifically to the STEM guys that dance was a way that they could meet girls.

So anyway. I joined the swing dance club, and met a few guys. And at one point, when socializing with the guys outside of dance class, one of them asked me what my research was on. (I had already established that I was an honors history student doing a thesis, just as he had established that he was an honors… I’m not sure if he was CS or Math, but it was one of those.)

So I gave him the thumbnail sketch of my research. Now, to be clear, an honors senior thesis, while nothing like what a graduate student would do, was still fairly in-depth. I had to translate primary sources from the original late-Classical Latin. (My professor said, basically, that while there were plenty of translations of my source material, that I’d only be able to comfortably trust them if I had at least made a stab at a translation of my own. And he was right.) And there was so much secondary material, often contradictory, that I had been carefully sorting through.

But I was able to sift it into a three-sentence summary of my senior thesis work, you know, as one does.

So I gave him that summary, and then asked–since he was also an undergraduate senior doing an honors thesis–what his research was on.

“Oh,” he said, “you wouldn’t understand it.”

Reader, I went home in a frothing rage. Because I had thought we were playing one game–a game of ‘let’s talk about what we’re passionate about!’– and he had been playing another game, which was, one-upsmanship. I had done my best to give a basically understandable brief of my research–and he had used that against me. As if my research, my painstaking translation, my digging through archives and ILLs of esoteric works, my reading of ten thousand articles in Speculum (yes, the pre-eminent medievalist journal in North America is called Speculum, I’m sorry, it’s hilarious/sad but also true), and then my effort to sum it up for him, was nothing. Because his research into some kind of algorithm or other was just too complex for my tiny brain to conceive of. Because I just couldn’t possibly understand his work.

Now, the important note here is that the person I went home to was my senior year roommate. She was a graduate student–normally undergrads and graduate students couldn’t be roommates, but we’d been friends for years, and the tenured faculty-in-residence used his powers for good and permitted us to be roommates that year. Anyway. My senior year roommate was basically… in retrospect I think possibly an avatar of Athena. She was six feet tall, blonde, attractive in a muscular athletic way, a rock climber and racquetball player, sweet but sharp, extremely socially awkward, exceptionally kind even when it cost her to be kind, and an incredibly brilliant computer science major who spent most of her time working on extremely complicated mathematical algorithms. (Yes, I was a little in love with her, why do you ask? But she was as straight as a length of rope, and is now happily married, and so am I, so it worked out.)

(Still, yes, she is my mental image of Athena, to this day.)

Anyway, I came home in a frothing rage to my roommate, the Athena avatar. And I said, “He made me feel like such an idiot, that I could sum up my research to him but his research was just too smart for stupid little me.”

And she shut her book, and smiled at me, with her dark eyes and her high cheekbones and her bright hair, and said, “If he can’t explain his research to you, then he’s not nearly as smart as he thinks he is.”

Now I hesitated, because I’d be in college long enough to have sort of bought into the ridiculous idea that if you couldn’t dazzle them with your brilliance, you should baffle them with your bullshit. But she said, “Look, I’ve been doing work on computer science algorithms that have significantly complicated mathematical underpinnings. What do I do?”

And I said, “Genetic algorithms–that is, self-optimizing algorithms–for prioritization, specifically for scheduling.”

“Right,” she said. “You couldn’t code them because you’re not a computer scientist or a mathematician. But you can understand what I do. If someone can’t explain it like that, it isn’t a problem with you as a person. It’s a problem with them. They either don’t understand it as well as they think they do–or they want to make you feel inferior. And neither is a positive thing.”

So. There.

If you are looking into something and have a question, and someone treats you like an idiot for not understanding right away… here is what I have to say: maybe it isn’t you who is the idiot.

compliments - zach dempsey

word count: 1.245

warnings: none i think???? romance lmao

plot: you decide to brighten up zach’s day with a few compliments in his bag

a/n: i just wanted to write something quick and cute so here

part 2

The class emptied seconds after the dismissive bell rang. The previous silence that reigned over the halls was now shattered by hundreds of voices, hundreds of footsteps hitting the ground.

Usually, you’d be out of the classroom in the blink of an eye but for some reason, on this particular day, you took your sweet time placing your notebook and pens in their designated bag.

That slowness resulted in you seeing something unexpected.

Keep reading

I really like you, you know? (Zach Dempsey x Reader)

Request: “Can I request a fic with Zach where the reader and Zach are snapchatting. The reader is really sleepy because she’s been staying up late to get homework done and being so tired, she accidently tells Zach she likes him a lot. (Can it be fluffy and a little angsty?)”

————————————

It was still 4:30p.m., but you were already tired and longing for your bed. You tried really hard to keep your eyes open, but they had their way of beating you. Finally, you gave up. You got up from the table you were occupying on the school’s library, picked up your stuff and walked home.

The second you got into your room, you took of your shoes and slowly climbed into your bed. You hadn’t even closed your eyes yet when your phone lighted up and buzzed.

“How hard is it for a girl to get her beauty sleep in this wicked world?” you mumbled like a real drama queen, talking to the walls. You reached out lazily for your phone and, suddenly, all your complains went away. The top notification was a Snapchat from Zach Dempsey.

After waiting a while (in your mind, opening it up too quickly would make him think you were desperate), you finally saw his chat. It was just random letters, probably sent by mistake. You rolled your eyes, not believing you created all that expectation in your head. What were you thinking? That Zach freaking Dempsey snapchatted you saying he was madly crushing you?

You sent a question mark back and put your phone away. It only took five seconds for it to buzz again.

“You have got to be kidding me”

You didn’t want to look, all you wanted was a nice nap. Your curiosity spoke louder, and you picked it back up.

Zach Dempsey: Oh hello Y/N this is Zach and I stare at your Snapchat stories like an idiot
Zach Dempsey: I’m lovesick because of uuuuuu
Zach Dempsey: let me be the juliet to your romeo
Zach Dempsey: I’m juliet coz I’m a little girl

You realized it was one of his friends joking around, and laugh softly. You decided to mess around too.

You: I knew it.
Zach Dempsey: that I’m a little girl????
You: oh yeah. it’s common knowledge.

Video call from : Zach Dempsey

You didn’t expect this. You didn’t know if you should pick up or not. You decided to go on with the game, so you fixed your hair and made sure you looked okay. You pressed “answer” and Justin Foley’s face showed up on the screen. It looked like they were at the gymnasium, probably practicing basketball.

“Yo Dempsey! I got your phone man” Justin yelled, and the camera focused on Zach, who was standing at the other side of the gym. “You shouldn’t have told me your password!”

“Dude what are you doing?” Zach rushed over and tried to get his phone out of Justin’s hands. You giggled and, with that sound, Dempsey just stopped moving. “Foley. What was that?”

Justin showed him the screen, and his eyes widened when he saw your face.

“Well hello there” you said, not knowing what to do.

“Y/N, hi. I-uh, hang on, I’ll call you back okay?” The screen went black and his face disappeared. You waited for the call and, since it didn’t came, you tried to sleep again. Unsuccessfully, you should add.

Grumbling, you kicked your covers away, picked up your books and started studying again in your desk.

———

You were so entertained by your homework you almost missed the notification from Zach. Almost. You unlocked your phone and checked it out.

Zach Dempsey: Hey, I’m sorry for earlier. Justin is an idiot
You: It’s okay 😂

You weren’t really expecting an answer after that, but fortunately it came.

Zach Dempsey: well anyway
Zach Dempsey: wyd?

You gave the pile of papers and books in front of you a sad glance.

You: homework. u?
Zach Dempsey: just chillin I guess

You sighed, jealous of his procrastination.

You: let’s trade please, I can’t stand biology anymore
Zach Dempsey: send all the bio stuff for me. I’ll do it for you, I love bio

What a cutie. He loved bio.

You: don’t give me ideas, Dempsey. I’ll send it for real
Zach Dempsey: lol
Zach Dempsey: you can come over some day and I’ll give you a hand

Oh my god. Zach invited you to his place. You and him, at his house. What a time to be alive.

You: that would be nice :)
Zach Dempsey: so… I’m sorry if that’s like way too intrusive but I wanna ask something
You: dear lord… shoot

Your heart skipped a beat. Was he really going to ask you out?

Zach Dempsey: are you and colin jensen a thing?

Well, apparently not. No dates for miss (Y/N) and mr Zach Dempsey.

You: who tf is colin jensen?
Zach Dempsey: you know, skinny dude who works at crestmont

You let out a loud laugh.

You: you mean clay jensen?
Zach Dempsey: probably
Zach Dempsey: anyway
Zach Dempsey: are you guys together?
You: no sir

The conversation just went on and on, and you liked Zach more and more by the second. He was sweet and funny, and talking to him was just so nice… but you really, really needed to sleep.

You: hey, I gotta go
Zach Dempsey: why??
You: I need some sleep
Zach Dempsey: it’s eight o'clock my lady

My lady. Jesus Christ.

You: I know
You: but I didn’t sleep last night
Zach Dempsey: what were you up to?
You: at a date with my usual partner
Zach Dempsey: 🤔
Zach Dempsey: usual partner?
You: homework
Zach Dempsey: oh, I see
Zach Dempsey: but can’t you stay just a little longer?
You: that’s not a very good idea
You: sleep deprived (Y/N) usually talks more than she should
Zach Dempsey: one more reason why you should stick around w me
Zach Dempsey: this conversation is about to get interesting
Zach Dempsey: stay pleease

Well, he was asking… you guessed it couldn’t be that bad staying up just a few more minutes.

You: okay, I’ll give you some extra time
You: what do you wanna talk about?
Zach Dempsey: let’s play a game

Uh-oh.

You: what kind of game?
Zach Dempsey: nothing special, just asking each other some questions
You: ok fine, you go first
Zach Dempsey: I’ll take it easy on you because it’s the first question
Zach Dempsey: we’re just warming up
Zach Dempsey: what’s your favorite color?

You laughed again.

You: how original my man
You: green
Zach Dempsey: I’m one of a kind
Zach Dempsey: your turn
You: I’m not extending the courtesy of taking it easy, sorry
You: are you and justin dating?

He sent you a picture of his face. He was frowning, trying to cover a smile.

Zach Dempsey: you’re lame. that’s a terrible question, and the answer is no
You: that was a valid question
Zach Dempsey: there will be a payback
Zach Dempsey: you better believe in karma
Zach Dempsey: my question is why are you single

You didn’t really understood the question. You rubbed your eyes and yawned.

You: what do you mean
Zach Dempsey: I mean, you’re beautiful and smart and funny and I just don’t get how can you not have a boyfriend

You froze. Before you could realize the huge mistake you were making, you sent him the most stupid confession ever.

You: I couldn’t date anyone because you’re the one that I like, and it’s like a lot

Your eyes widened when your own words sunk in. You really should have stopped the conversation when you had the chance. Damn it, damn it, damn it. You waited anxiously for his answer. He opened the chat, visualized your message and…

He ignored it.

You even waited a few minutes but there was no response. “Well, congratulations (Y/N), you ruined everything as usual”, you thought, and climbed up your bed. You picked up your blankets from the floor and covered your ashamed and self loathing body.

It felt like you had just fallen asleep when a noise woke you up. Scared, you almost fell on the floor. It sounded like… knocks?

You picked up a baseball bat you kept on the floor (just for hitting strangers because you couldn’t even play any sports) and looked around. Suddenly, you saw Zach outside your window.

“Oh my god!” you whispered, in shock, and opened the lock so he could come inside. “What are you doing here? Jesus I only have my pajamas on!”

You covered yourself with your arms, which made Zach laugh.

“I came here because I wanted to know if what you said was true. You know, the I-like-you-a-lot thing” he asked in a serious tone.

“God just forget I said it, it’s embarrassing really” you looked away from him.

“I don’t think so”

“Well, that’s because you don’t have feelings for someone who doesn’t like you back” you whispered, trying not to get your parents attention.

Suddenly, Zach’s hands were on your waist and he pulled you close, with nothing but an inch of air between your bodies. Your heart started beating like crazy. One of his hands went up to your jaw and caressed it. His fingers made their way to your lips, separating them.

“Who said anything about not liking back?” he whispered too, and then pressed his lips against yours.

——————————–

Sooo I hope you liked it, I’m sorry if it’s different from what you expected!

Zim +Friendship with DIb (IZ Discussion/Theory)

Zim is one of those characters whom comes off as either self centered or as stated in the series multiple times, a defective. Even his older self in one of the comic issues came off as such:

Now, too me I don’t think ZIM is an entirely ‘evil’ character as perceived, but he is definitely a force to be recognized and when pissed off can be your worst nightmare. He becomes destructive and more or less, borderline homicidal when angered:

A funny thing I noticed was, ZIM actually noticed his future self was taller. If you don’t know, in the series ZIM has always wanted to be respected by the Tallests or even have a sort of higher authority. Yet, when he finds out that there was only heals, the expression he has is rather..Interesting
According to Wally Wingert during an interview with a fan he stated that the Tallests were going to later be revealed as just normal sized Irkens whom wore exo-skeletons to show make them seem taller. 
Just a little insight into this panel, it may have something to show more about Irken societal views:

Still, in the long run and even grown up, ZIM still longs for the recognition he wanted and ended up getting it. What he’s longed for all along has been recognition and being noticed by anyone of his society especially his leaders. And the quote “We didn’t think you could pull it off.” just goes to show how poor ZIM is viewed by his people. Now, I should note he is not completely hated by all Irkens and does have Skoodge as a sort of childhood ‘buddy’: 

This is another small thing I kind of wanted to bring up, ZIM’s self doubt. This isn’t really brought up in other discussions but I think it’s extremely important to his character. Especially since his older self is calling him stupid in the panel, grant it could just be for petty fighting I still think it sheds a little more into the character. The main point here is his, “My plan was stupid. But it’s smart.” argument:

Next, is his relationship with Dib & Earth in general. I don’t think ZIM hates Dib at all, just my opinion however. I believe it’s an unusual friendship that both sides will probably never admit too. ZIM actually saves Dib in one of the recent issues. They both seem too understand one another too the point where even if ZIM is flubbering out nonsense, Dib understands:

Not to mention Dib and ZIM are the only characters (besides the Tallests) seen spending a lot of time together:

Now, another thing I saw was the fact that these two agreed. ZIM actually agreed with Dib on how ridiculous the aliens were. And it even shows that ZIM has a small affection for Earth by questioning, “Why are all other aliens that come here so stupid?” (ZIM despite the many antics, is an impressive engineer and builder. Don’t forget he was a scientist temporarily before Miyuki was suddenly killed by a monster HE invented.):

On another note, I thought this was interesting most of all. Dib points at Earth in the panel, meanwhile looking at ZIM. He said “/We’re/ back home! Where /we/ started!” 
Too me this is a small indication that Dib considers ZIM a part of Earth in a way. Probably since he’s been there for a long time. He refers to Earth as ZIM’s home also. ZIM has saved the Earth numerous amounts of times during the series and now in the comics. Dib, a native to Earth and human being, considered ZIM to live on Earth. This is a HUGE development if Dib really believes this:

More than anything, I think ZIM just wants a true friend (Cough, DIB, GAZ, SKOODGE, GIR, MINIMOOSE.) I mean, look how happy the poor fellow looks in this panel. He thought he was riding with another alien friend:

And the biggest reveal of all, ZIM opening up about himself to Dib (in disguise). This is probably overlooked (This came from a Tumblr post, I searched everywhere to find the actual comic panel.) by many people. ZIM has never really opened up very much about his emotional state. 
“I come out here when I want to be alone..” 
It just goes to show that you really can’t doubt ZIM. He IS an emotional character and DOES have feelings. Even if they rarely show, much like this panel, it shows the reader that ZIM does have extreme doubts about himself. 
“And just think about what it all means.”
I interpret this as him not knowing where he stands in life. He’s tried for years to find his place. This galaxy means probably, mind the unintended pun, the world too him and he hasn’t destroyed it because it might just be one of the only true things that makes ZIM happy and realizing that there’s small things in life that can make him truly feel happy. Where he can’t be judged. Where he can be himself and where he can think about himself. 

Thank you for reading! I’ve been wanting too make this post for quite a while now! I definitely want to hear what others think on this. This was just my contribution to ZIM’s character analysis.

To Become A Hunter

Characters: Dean Winchester, Sister!reader, John Winchester, Sam Winchester [mentioned]

Words: 3900+ (I’m really sorry about that, but there was no good place to split it)

Warnings: Can’t think of anything specific, really, maybe just that there’s going to be a verbal fight, I dunno. Maybe a bit of swearing, not too much.

A/N: This is the fic I was talking about! It’s a pre-series sister AU, that takes place in between around 2003. Dean is 24, Sam is 20 and at Stanford and you are 17 years old. It’ll also be a mini-series, so there’s more parts to come. It might be a bit all over the place, but I was trying to create a certain feeling. (I don’t know what I’m talking about, but I hope you like it!)

Originally posted by whoeveryoulovethemost

Originally posted by negandarylsatisfaction

Originally posted by xohollandroden

Your name: submit What is this?

Hunting is hard, and that’s no surprise, really. It’s physically challenging, you have to be smart, have technique, and it’s just hard emotionally as well. And, not only is it hard, but you hate it as well.

Okay, hate is a strong word, but things about it, you really do hate. You hate the way you have to sacrifice what feels like everything for it. You hate the way you feel like you miss out on life. You hate the pain and the constant fear. You hate the way it forces you to see the world more black and white instead of with all the shades of grey. You hate the way you get shut down every time you question this. You hate the way your dad responds with ’because you have to’ when you ask ’why?’.

John Winchester used to be in the military and it shows, you could testify to that. All your life he has been hard on you and your brothers. But, despite this, you are not afraid to stand up to him, question him, call him out. Although it often comes with consequences.

Keep reading

the anonymous wall (teenlock)

Based off this headcanon  (from @grumpy-swoop)

Read it on ao3


Mike had known that something good would come out of this stupid Anonymous Confession Wall, and now he had proof. Amongst all the I spent thirty-two hours watching a tv show for seven-year olds last weekends and the If you’re reading this, go to the corner of the boys bathroom on the third floor near the chem labs and the cute doodles, there was the smallest, shyest, and most interesting confession.

I’m gay and hopelessly in love with the rugby captain

Keep reading

Cause You're My Favorite Hue: Alternate Ending

The world was black and white and that couldn’t be helped. Every waking day was viewed in various shades of grey, black, and white. And though it seemed rather boring, Alexander dealt with it. He had a loving wife, beautiful children, and a great job as a CFO for a world renowned publishing company. Things seemed great.

Keep reading

Submitted by @vampirequeenoffan

[Edit] I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU COMBINED THREE OF MY FAVORITE AUS INTO ONE FIC, BLESS YOU

No but really this was great and I’d love to read more of it, I find the idea super interesting, like sirens are such a common and wellknown threat that lifeguards are hired specifically for their ability to resist them, super cool!

Sorry it took me a little while to respond to this, I enjoyed it so much I wanted to draw a lil smth for it




There was a time of the evening when it was easiest to strike. Sock had gotten it down to a science. When it got darker and cooler, the crowd on the beach thinned, and so too did the number of lifeguards. Three, two, and then just one, standing watch over the tourists still milling about on the sand and splashing around in the shallows. One life guard, however watchful, couldn’t keep track of everything at once, and there were blind spots to be exploited if you knew where they were.

Needless to say, Sock did.

Keep reading

lulimoon  asked:

RFA + V + Saeran reacting to MC being an mermaid?? Your blog ir my fave mysme hc blog /sorryforthebadenglish

You’re english is actually very good! :) Thank you so much for your support! This was actually a very fun, interesting prompt. As you might notice, I kinda switched between mythologies and kinds of mermaids between characters, so hopefully that makes things interesting! Enjoy!


Yoosung

  • MC decided to show him in the bathtub in her apartment
  • His jaw dropped
  • The only thing that came out of his mouth was, “You look like a mermaid from LOLOL!”
  • MC laughed as he blushed, and explained that her mermaid cousin had actually designed a lot of mythical creatures for various fantasy based games, and she knows her cousin designed the mermaids for LOLOL
  • She’s got scales her and there, imbedded in her cheeks and shoulders, and Yoosung just can’t stop staring because she’s so sparkly and pretty
  • Before he can help it, he says, “If anything happens, at least I’m a vet.”
  • MC laughs and pulls him into the tub for that comment
  • He has so many questions for later, but holds them back in this moment to just let this whole situation sink in

Jaehee

  • For some reason, MC insisted they go to the beach
  • No real explanation
  • MC would only say that there was something she wanted to show Jaehee
  • It was a warm and sunny day, there were plenty of people, but MC dragged her to this perfect little hideaway beach where no one else could see them swim
  • MC dragged Jaehee in once they’d set up camp and they swam and played and eventually MC coaxed Jaehee down into the water so that she could see her bottom half clearly
  • Jaehee was so startled she had to go up for air
  • MC shyly peaked her head up in the water and Jaehee could see how nervous she was and calmed down
  • They go up to the beach, but sit so that the ocean comes up to the hips
  • They talk, Jaehee feels MC’s tail and asks questions about mermaids, a kind of child-like curiosity in wanting to know about her people
  • MC was just relieved Jaehee was so accepting of her and still wanted to be with her

Zen

  • It was always interesting to him that MC knew so very little about popular media and some common social norms
  • She had a phone, of course, but she’d seemed surprised when he turned on the TV one day, and half the time, electronics seemed to confuse her
  • Of course, it was adorable watching her flounder and ask for his help
  • she also seemed to eat a lot of fish
  • Then, one day, a woman showed up while they were on a date
  • She and MC went off privately a little and fought about something, the other woman trying to force something into MC’s hands
  • When MC came back, she told Zen there was something they really needed to talk about
  • He almost didn’t believe her when she explained that she was a mermaid, but she had purposely transformed for him, and he was… well, he was in awe
  • MC also awkwardly explained that she… well, she made a deal with a Sea Witch, her sisters are scared she’ll never return to the ocean and die, like fable of the Little Mermaid
  • MC won’t as long as she pays the Sea Witch off or… uses the blood of the man she loves to null the contract all together
  • MC assures him that paying the Sea Witch is already taken care of, so he doesn’t need to worry about that
  • Zen still worries that her sisters will come try to kill him, but MC assures him that they know better than to try

Jumin

  • When MC told him, he thought she was joking
  • Seriously, if she was a mermaid, how did she have legs now?
  • Well, MC explains that mermaids can leave the sea for long durations of time, but eventually have to return for a year (or five) in order to live
  • Thank goodness for modern amenities, however, as she is able to mix up a makeshift saltwater bath, dip in, and prove it
  • Jumin’s face suddenly darkens and asks if she has any skins that she needs to wear to transform or if she has a mermaid husband, but MC quickly tells him he’s thinking of selkie and he has nothing to worry about
  • MC is very impressed with his knowledge of mythology
  • Then again, he reads a lot of… let’s say, interesting, books
  • She assures him that, because she can mix up a salt water bath whenever she needs, she can and will stay with him
  • That’s all he needs to hear
  • He sets up a few precautions to protect MC, intends to keep her secret secret, and does some research
  • Jumin discovers online that mermaids like shiny things, so he buys MC a ton of shiny things and she goes nuts for it, which makes him happy

Saeyoung

  • “I always thought there was something fishy about you!”
  • Omfg, Saeyoung, not now. Get that stupid grin off your face.
  • Btw, he walked in on her in the tub with her tail hanging out the side
  • On the surface he takes the whole thing surprisingly well, cracking jokes, asking questions
  • “How long have you been a mermaid? Can you breathe underwater? Do you have a pod or a pet dolphin? How deep underwater can you go?”
  • On the inside, he’s planning/panicking
  • How is he going to hide her secret and protect her? Because he certainly didn’t know mermaids existed until now
  • MC is honestly surprised by his apparent enthusiasm
  • They end up having a long, semi-serious conversation about her being a mermaid, how they can hide it, and who they should and shouldn’t tell
  • Then they talk mermaid stuff, like how she never gets pruney, she doesn’t need air because she has gils, and what prompted her to leave the sea in the first place

V

  • Honestly, the moment V heard that MC was a mermaid, he didn’t believe it until she showed him by dragging him to a secluded beach
  • And the moment he saw her, he just wanted to take her picture
  • So he did, catching a gorgeous shot of her tail catching the light just right and the ocean as a backdrop
  • That was the only picture V took, he made one print of it, and hid the film
  • The only people who would ever see the picture were himself and MC
  • The picture was too beautiful to destroy, and V itched to take more, but never would to protect her secret 
  • MC is honestly surprised at how well he handled everything
  • V really likes the sound of her singing, but she has a bad habit of singing sea shanties, so he can’t help but laugh at the stereotypical mermaid things she does

Saeran

  • When he found out, Saeran was so scared she was going to leave him to return to the sea
  • MC assured him she wasn’t going anywhere, but he was still scared to bits
  • Besides, MC was a freshwater mermaid and grew by a river and a lake
  • Saeran ends up having Saeyoung help him build a bunch of water proof electronic devices (including a phone and a smart watch with a tracker inside) for MC so that he can still keep track of her if she goes underwater
  • As… invasive as it is, the devises also notify her when someone is checking her location
  • MC ends up showing the devises off to her mermaid friends, who then wish to use valuables they’ve gathered from accidents and wrecks to pay for phones for themselves
  • She also takes a ton of underwater photos for Saeran so that he can see what she sees
  • Once they’re living together in a place near a river, he’s so much more at ease
The Arrangement: Part 7

Title:  The Arrangement: Part 7

Summary:  He’s a mechanic. She’s a lonely woman with more money than she knows what to do with. Fate brings them together and sparks fly. But only for six weeks. That’s the arrangement.

Need to catch up? The Arrangement Master Post

Author:  Dean’s Dirty Little Secret

Characters:  Dean Winchester x Female Reader

Word Count:  2372

Warnings:  lots of angst; explicit language, explicit sexual content, nsfw,  

Author’s Notes:  This is a multi-part series. Shifts between multiple points of view. There is a NSFW gif beneath the cut.

Originally posted by deangifsdaily

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Sit Still--Imagine #20

Anonymous said: Crush sits cross legged on floor while the reader draws him and he has to stay still and it’s all cute and stuf!

A/N: Again, I apologize for all these imagines being written so late. I hope the people that requested awhile ago see theirs! Thank you all for requesting! Right now my ask box is closed and I’m not taking anymore requests until I get the old requests written. This is just one of many on the way. Keep dreaming!~Logan <3


Sighing again, I erased the same line I’d drawn at least 300 times now. 

“C/n!” I almost shouted, exasperated. 

“What?!” C/n asked, startled by my outburst since it’d been quiet in my room for awhile now. 

“Can you please sit still? I’ve been trying to draw your jaw and ear for the past, like, 30 minutes and every time I think I’ve got it down or am close to getting it down, you squirm and I have to start all over again!”

“Sorry, y/n! It’s just hard to sit in this position for so looonnggg,” he said, dragging out the last word. 

I let out a frustrated growl and he smirked. 

“Well, what position do you prefer?” I rubbed my temples in frustration. 

I swear, I loved this boy but he sure knew how to test my patience. 

“Mm, missionary, to be honest,” he shrugged, his face devoid of emotion like it always was right before he cracked up at his own joke. 

“Ugghh, fuck you!” I whacked him in the arm with my sketchpad, his shoulders shaking as he roared with laughter. 

He could be so immature sometimes. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t love his immature sense of humor. 

“I wish you would,” he smirked, eyes shining with mirth.

“It’s a good thing you’re cute,” I grumbled, crossing my arms and glaring at him. 

“Why?” He asked, sporting a shit-eating grin.

“Because if you weren’t I’d be using this pencil to stab you, instead of using it to draw your stupid cute face.”

“Oh my god, am I your muse?” He asked dramatically

“No, you’re my pain in the ass,” I rolled my eyes. 

He gasped, clutching his chest dramatically, “She called me her pain in the ass.”

“Alright, Romeo, calm down. Now can you please sit still?” 

“Only if I can sit on the floor, cross-legged,” he said, smoothing his clothes. 

“Anything to get you to sit still,” I said, moving off the chair I was sitting on, to plop myself on my floor. 

He stepped off the stool I’d sat him in originally and sat cross-legged in front of me. He turned his head to the side like he’d had it before, clenching his jaw. 

I dragged my eyes away from the delicious site of his side profile to sketch it more accurately. A few minutes had passed, the only sound in the room was some relaxing music I’d put on low, the sound of lead scratching over paper, and our soft breaths. I had moved on to drawing c/n’s broad shoulders, trying to get the shading and outline right when c/n’s voice broke the silence. 

“I never asked you what your project was for, y/n.”

I almost dropped my pencil, leaving a crooked line that I quickly erased.

“It’s a drawing project,” I said, trying to avoid answering truthfully. 

“No shit, Sherlock,” out of the corner of my eyes I could see a smirk on his face before he went back to talking. “I mean, why’d you pick me for it? Every assignment you’ve gotten so far in your drawing class has come with some prompt. Some reason behind why you’re drawing the thing.”

I pretended not to hear him, pretended I was too engrossed in shading the wrinkles of his loose hoodie. 

“Y/nnn,” he dragged out my name in a taunting way. 

My cheeks heated up and I bit my lip. There was no way he was going to drop the subject. He knew when he was getting under my skin. 

I huffed before mumbling, “I’m supposed to draw someone…that–umm–that…”

“That?” He asked, his voice gentle, coaxing me. 

“That I–basically a person–well someone…someoneIadmire,” I blurted, the words coming out slurred into one. 

I had finished drawing his hoodie and realized that the line of his upper lip hadn’t come out right. Trying to distract myself from the fact I’d basically revealed my true feelings for him, I looked up to study his lips only to find his wide eyes staring back at me. 

“I have to get your lips right,” I said, my voice sounding strained. 

Feeling awkward under his unwavering stare, I cleared my throat. He wasn’t turning his head back to the original position so I decided to take control. I shuffled forward on my knees so I was close enough, and reached a finger out. Slowly, my finger glided over the curve of his jaw and I heard his breathing shallow. I applied slight pressure as my finger reached the side of his chin. He obediently moved his head to the side. I let my finger linger on his skin a moment longer than necessary before pulling away and settling back in my original place to start again on drawing his lips. 

It seemed that my words had sent c/n into a strange kind of trance and anxiety settled in my stomach. 

My tongue stuck out as I tried to re-shape his lips on my paper. I looked up again to find c/n had moved his head to stare at me again. 

“On second thought maybe I should’ve chosen someone else. You can’t seem to keep your neck turned,” I chuckled softly, finding his antics more cute than annoying like I liked to act they were. 

“Sorry, it’s just hard to resist looking at you for even a little bit,” he mumbled, turning his head again. 

I frowned, wondering where my confident, snarky boy c/n had gone and how a shy boy with flushed cheeks had come to take his place. 

My own cheeks flushed at his confession, but I tried not to take it to heart. He couldn’t possibly like observing me, staring at me. 

“It’s alright, but just try to hold your head in place for just a little longer. Lips have always been tricky for me to draw and yours are giving me an especially hard time,” I chuckled, trying to lighten the tension in the room. 

“Maybe you should kiss them,” he suggested and I dropped my pencil my eyes flying up to look at him. 

Of course, of all times he chose this one to keep his head turned away from mine. Still, I could see the edge of his lips quirk up a bit in one of those rare smiles that he gave when he felt equal parts shy and equal parts bold. 

“And just what do you expect that will do in helping me with drawing them, hm, c/n?” I asked, crossing my arms. 

“If you can feel the grooves of my lips, you might find it easier to draw them. Drawing may be all about observing visually, but I think it benefits you when you observe sensuously as well,” he said.

I just sat there, my head fighting between what I desired and what I logically knew to be smart to do. 

“What harm could it do, y/n?”

I breathed deep. He was right. What harm could it really do? A million answers to that question ran through my mind but I focused on him instead. The delicious way his lips were frozen in that soft grin, the adorable bend of his nose, the way his eyelashes curled just the slightest at the ends. 

I moved to sit in front of him, his head still frozen in his pose. Finally, our eyes met. His were adoring and in awe, gliding over my face, drinking me in. I moved in, slowly, until my lips were just brushing against his. Internally, I was screaming, shouting for joy, and laughing giddily but externally all that I could do before I pressed my lips completely to his was let out a weak breath. 

What registered first was the slightly chapped texture of his lips, and then the softness of them underneath that. And finally, the fact that he was not pressing back into mine.

Pulling back abruptly, and overcome with embarrassment, I looked him in the eyes. 

“Why–why didn’t you kiss me back?” I asked, my confusion quickly turning into panic. 

“Because you told me to stay still,” he answered, eyes dancing with mischief, his breath shallow which told me I wasn’t the only one affected by what I’d just done.

Shaking my head, I let out a breathy laugh while rolling my eyes playfully. That’s when he gently placed his hands on either sides of my cheeks and pulled me in for the sweetest kiss. 

As we pulled back and regained our breath, I giggled, “You may be the worst model ever, but you’re the best damn kisser.”

“Well, then you’ve gotta keep me around. Especially if you plan on drawing any more pictures of me and need more help with…observing…my lips,” he chuckled.

“Oh, I’m keep you right where you are,” I laughed, before he pulled me in for another kiss. 

The Sunrise (Sirius Black x Hufflepuff!Reader)

Originally posted by nellaey

Part 2
Part 3

Request by Anonymous: Hey, so I know you mainly focus on Newt Scamander imagines but I was wondering if you would consider doing a Sirius Black x hufflepuff reader imagine? Like where he stereotypes hufflepuffs as lazy and boring and stuff? K LOVE YOU THANKS

Word Count: 2, 004

Warnings: None

A/N: Don’t judge, I’ve never written Sirius before.
This is a shorter imagine.
I FINALLY UPDATED THANK GOD.

(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧

Sirius had to admit, Hogwarts was creepy when it was silent. He glanced at his watch; 5:57am. Four minutes since he had decided to sneak out from the Gryffindor dorms. He had lain in his bed since 5am, unable to fall asleep again. He didn’t know why he had woken up, perhaps by the joint force of James’ and Peter’s snores. He was so bored, he had to go do something and he knew he’d feel bad if he woke up any of his friends, so he decided to go break some rules and sneak out, still in his pyjamas. The sun hadn’t risen yet and the school was shrouded in darkness, the only light coming from the tip of his wand. He made sure to be quiet as he walked down the many hallways, and to keep the wand away from the paintings that lined the walls, so as to not wake them up.

He was walking down a hallway to go prank a particularly nasty teacher in his classroom, when he heard a cheeky giggle he knew all too well. He mumbled a curse under his breath and turned into the courtyard, dashing behind a tree. That damn poltergeist. Apparently he didn’t take any break from causing trouble, even in the small hours of the morning. Sirius knew that if Peeves saw or heard him he’d run to tell the Bloody Baron and Sirius would be in a world of trouble for sneaking out, so he held his breath and kept perfectly still. As much as he liked to make people believe that detentions didn’t bother him, he’d prefer not to get one. He stayed in his spot until the silence reassured him that the poltergeist had gone and he breathed a sigh of relief, his breath fogging up in the chilly morning air.

“Peeves rarely comes down to this part of the castle.” A voice said, making him jump. He looked around for the source of the voice and his eyes landed on you, already in your Hufflepuff robes, sitting under a tree with a book in one hand and your lit wand in your other, your eyes still on the book. “Something or someone must have lured him here.” You said, looking at him now and raising an accusatory eyebrow. He was confused as to why you were sitting on the cold ground when there was a perfectly good bench a few feet away from you, but he shook it off and gave you one of his signature smirks.

“Couldn’t have been me. Though Hufflepuffs aren’t exactly known to be stealthy, must have been you he followed.” He said, enjoying how he made you grit your teeth in annoyance. He already knew he’d enjoy bugging you.

“It couldn’t have been me because I’ve been here since 5 and I come here often and he’s never found me.” You said, trying to keep your calm. You were usually a nice, calm person but the second someone insults your house, your temper shortens by a half. Sirius was surprised anyone woke up that early to sneak out and consequently break many rules, especially a Hufflepuff.

“What’s a Hufflepuff doing out of the den before noon?” He asked, now leaning on the tree, arms crossed. You pursed your lips angrily.

“Wow, in the space of 10 seconds you’ve managed to insult both me and my house twice.” You said.

“It’s truly a gift.” He said, grinning at your annoyed expression.

“Truly.” You grumbled sarcastically, turning back to your book. He took this time to properly look at you. You didn’t seem too bothered by the cold air (and the cold ground you were sitting on) nor did you look tired, even though you had woken up pretty early. The light from your wand was making your H/C hair shine and E/C eyes sparkle, though that may have just been your irritation. Sirius had to admit, you were pretty and he wondered why he’d never seen you before. He had quite an eye for pretty girls, and that you hadn’t caught his or vice versa bewildered him. You looked around his age, which stumped him even more. “Stop staring at me.” You said, not looking at him. His heavy gaze making you feel uncomfortable.

“How old are you?” He asked out of nowhere. Your gaze turned to him at his random question. You decided not to comment on it.

“Sixteen.” You answered, deciding to just answer his questions without much conversation. You really didn’t feel like talking to him, for multiple reasons. The great Sirius Black was known for his trouble and he really didn’t seem like a nice person. So, he thought, you were the same age as him, same year, so how has he never noticed you?

“What’s your name?” He asked. You sighed at his continuation of this strange conversation you were having.

“Y/F/N.” You said.

“Y/F/N…?”

“Y/F/N Y/L/N.” He stayed quiet for a moment, making you gaze at him suspiciously. “Ok, what?” You finally asked.

“I don’t remember you.” He said, looking genuinely distressed. He prided himself in his knowledge of everyone, something he frequently used to his advantage when he wanted something. You snorted, typical Sirius Black, sitting on his little throne, completely oblivious to others. You didn’t really know what you expected though, from a person who finds amusement in teasing others and flirting with girls without it actually leading anywhere.

“I’m not surprised.” You said, giving him a disapproving look. The corners of his lips quirked upwards, completely unaffected by your words.

“And why is that?” He asked, walking over to you and plopping down on the ground across from you, a little too close for comfort. You narrowed your eyes at him and placed your book down.

“Well why should I not be? I really can’t imagine you paying any attention to someone who wasn’t fawning over you or who wasn’t your current victim.”

“A little teasing doesn’t do anyone any harm, Huffles.” You clenched your jaw at the nickname.

“Tell that to the first years crying in their beds because all the older kids just find it so funny that their textbooks keep running away.”

“You’re such a Hufflepuff.” He said, rolling his eyes.

“And you’re just an arrogant Gryffindor. Always the centre of attention, hm?”

“It’s not my fault I’m popular.” You gave a frustrated sigh.

“It’s pointless arguing with you.” You replied. He grinned widely at you. Despite your obvious attempts to drive him away, Sirius was thoroughly enjoying his time with you. You were especially feisty for a Hufflepuff and different from anyone he’s spoken to before. Most girls were flirty and giggly around him and the few that weren’t interested in him, he’d never felt drawn to. “Stop it.”

“Stop what?” He asking, smirking.

“Stop doing that with your face.”

“What? Smiling? I thought Hufflepuffs were all about the smiles.”

“Not when they’re creepy.”

“You offend me, Huffles.” He said, pouting. “I’ve been told I have quite a nice smile.”

“The people who told you that didn’t know how to let you down easily.” You quipped, flashing him a smirk of your own.

“You’re mean for a Hufflepuff.” He remarked, making you groan.

“Stop with the Hufflepuff shaming.” You exclaimed. “Hufflepuff is a great house.”

“Yeah, I’m sure it is. Wasn’t it Helga Hufflepuff who literally said ‘and I’ll take the rest’ when the founders where creating the houses?” He asked, raising his eyebrows at you. You glowered at him. You were actually starting to have an okay time until he said that.

“Helga Hufflepuff wanted a house where everyone fit in without having to prove that they’re the smartest or the bravest or the most cunning.” You said angrily. “Hufflepuffs are supposed to be kind and brave and loyal, nowhere does it say that they’re boring or lazy or push overs. We are smart and brave and kind and the only area we’re lacking in is producing dark wizards. And the second someone insults us, we protect fiercely.”

“Well, the last part is definitely true in your case.” He said. You gave him a small smile, embarrassed by your outburst. “Nice speech by the way.”

“Thanks, I’m actually considering being a motivational speaker.” You said sarcastically, pretending to be thoughtful. He smirked smugly at you, noticing that you were becoming more comfortable with him.

“You know, you haven’t actually told me what you’re doing out here so early.” He asked. The playful look on your face was suddenly replaced by a bashful one.

“I like to watch the sunrise.” You said quietly. The smirk fell from his face at your genuine response. He lowered his head, his hair falling to hide his face. You bit your lip nervously. “I know it’s stupid, I just-“

“No, no-” Sirius cut you off, reaching for your hand. Your mouth shut, surprised by the sudden sincere emotion. “I mean, it’s not stupid. I-“ He hesitated and paused for a minute. You gave his hand a light squeeze. His gaze flickered away and his hand slipped out of yours, making you miss it’s warmth. You scolded yourself. No, you don’t want Sirius to hold your hand. You don’t, you don’t, you don’t. Sirius cleared his throat, his signature smirk coming back. You frowned, you knew what that smirk meant and you didn’t want it. You liked the genuine Sirius, the one that you didn’t think many people saw. “So do you come here often?”

“Just on Wednesdays. I find that sunrises are prettiest on Wednesdays.” You said. He looked at you amusedly, raising a questioning eyebrow. You just shrugged in response. Suddenly you saw the first rays of light appear over the walls of the courtyard. You shushed Sirius, despite him not actually saying anything, making him chuckle, and pointed behind him. He turned around, scooting next to you and leaned his back on the tree,

You both watched the sun rise, watched the vibrant colours of orange and pink softly spread across the sky. You both saw how the light chased the darkness of the night away and welcome the new day with brilliant hues of red. You couldn’t help the smile that grew on your face. Watching the sunrise always filled you with a certain hope. You turned slightly to look at Sirius, his eyes on the sky. You were surprised to find a look of awe on his face, mouth slightly ajar. He looked open and vulnerable, you had to bite your lip to stop your smile from growing even more at the sight of this Sirius. Expression not hidden by a smirk or a witty remark.

He turned to look at you, catching you looking at him. You didn’t mind though when you saw him reciprocate your large grin. No smug look, no teasing words, just wonderment. You admired how the sun made his dark eyes and hair shine, a stark contrast to his usual ‘dark, bad boy’ look. What you didn’t know was that he was marvelling at you too, how your beautiful smile lit up your kind and passionate face and how your hair swayed slightly in the cool morning breeze. He snapped out of his trance and looked away, deciding to rest his gaze on the sunrise, the other beautiful sight before him.

“You know, Huffles,” he said, “you’re not so bad for a Hufflepuff.” You laughed and nudged his shoulder slightly. This time, he was grinning in triumph for making you laugh. He also didn’t try to push down the way his heart squeezed at the gentle sound.

“Prick.” You retorted, making him laugh at your weak insult. You sat in silence for a while longer. “You’re not so bad for a Gryffindor yourself.” You said, keeping your gaze on the sky despite you feeling his eyes on you.

“I’ll accept that.” Sirius said, giving a deep sigh.

“Nice PJ’s by the way.” You said, glancing at his dark blue pyjamas and making him burst into laughter.

(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧

Aaaah, I don’t know. How was that? Was it good? I’ve never tried writing Sirius before. Did I do ok? I don’t know, please tell me. Part 2 maybe? If you want? I hope you enjoyed it and thanks for reading.

Constructive criticism is welcome.

K LOVE YOU BYE

I tend to chew the inside of my bottom lip when I’m nervous or anxious. Right about now, it’s raw, almost numb, if that’s gives you a clue about how I’m feeling.

This morning when I woke up, I made oatmeal & let it sit until it was too thick & sticky to pick up with a spoon. I poured some milk in the bowl, watched the white trickle through the hills & mounds of oats, and had flashbacks of you biting your lip. That’s the face you’d make before you’d pull out & come on the sheets, my back or my stomach; like I was some porn star; like you didn’t caress my face a half hour earlier and tell me I “got the kind of beauty needs to be felt.” You remember how I reacted the first time you did that? Me neither, it’s fine.

I knew I had fucked up when you did that because you never asked if it was okay or cool; you assumed. Like I assumed that you really cared about me; that you were capable of loving. But that’s neither here nor there.

Somewhere between there and here though, I was late. Somewhere between my house & the drugstore, I realized that I was alone. Somewhere between my heart & my head, I decided that a baby isn’t something I needed or something that you’d want. Somewhere between my front door & the clinic my eyes started pouring and so did the sky.

This isn’t even for you. This is for me. Even if it was for you, you wouldn’t get it. By get it, I mean both understand and receive it.

I don’t want you thinking that you mean anything to me; because you shouldn’t even have to think about that. You could call now and I know I’d pick up desperately like you had something I need; because in actuality you do. I’m not exactly sure when you took it or if I gave it to you, but I know you have it. Picked it up right around the time you picked your boxers up off your bedroom floor and asked me how I was getting home. I could never make a home out of you, because men like you don’t have good foundations or sturdy walls. Your roofs leak and I’ve never been good with my hands. Any levelheaded girl would know that you needed more than just a fresh coat of paint.

I used to blame your father for leaving your mother, then your mother for leaving you be, then myself for not blaming you. But in life, you make choices. You chose to let your scars cut you again and again; to let the pain in; to let it stay. You chose to suffer.

I chose me.

The medical assistant told me it’s okay to have second thoughts. She doesn’t know this is the third clinic I’ve been to in four days. It’s not a question of whether or not I can do it. It’s a question of whether or not I want it to happen. When it does, we’re really over & I’m not sure if I’m okay with that. I’m not sure I’m even okay at all.

A smart girl would have left. She wouldn’t have had a reason to leave because she wouldn’t have come in. She wouldn’t have stay long enough to see the way you throw your head back in laughter whenever your niece dances, how your eyes squint when you smile too hard, how you crack your knuckles when you’re uncomfortable, how you breath deeply when you have to think of lie. She wouldn’t have seen you flinch the first time she reached out to touch you while you laid in bed staring into the darkness.

It’s hard to pinpoint the moment I realized I loved you. It wasn’t easy for me to admit it to myself; loving someone who proclaimed themselves incapable of love. We’d lay together, legs intertwined in a comfortable silence with your phone plugged into one of your homeboys portable speakers playing some R&B playlist you found & you’d say “you know I can’t give you what you want right? It’s what you deserve, but I just don’t think you’re gonna find it here.” What I wanted was for you to shut up.

Truthfully, I don’t regret loving you. It taught me patience & strength. Those are virtues I’m sure will be useful sometime in the future, when a child that isn’t ours won’t stop crying at 4 in the morning & I have to be up at 6.

I heard somewhere that true love is giving without the expectation of receiving. I never believed in that until you. That kind of love can’t be true though. It’s destructive, malicious even, & leaves you with a hollow chest that no amount of deep breathing can fill. The thing is, people don’t realize that you can only give what is being taken. You took my love. Honestly, if I was you, I would have to. You made me understand why hate & love are so often mistaken for each other.

You used to say I was stupid over you and I’d blush, shove you playfully, and tell you “stahpppp it” like it was a compliment; not knowing that I’d just confirmed everything you just said. It was stupid of me to think I could teach you how to love when you gave me no indication that you even wanted to learn. Stupid of me to think that I’d be the one to change you, when no one has ever changed on the basis of someone else wanting them to.

I used to go to your house when you weren’t around & sit with your mother at the kitchen table with the four mismatched chairs, hoping she’d break & tell me what I needed to do to make you love me. No one knows you better than your mother…..isn’t that what they say? I’d tell her about our arguments, things you’d said just to hurt me; to make me leave & she’d file her nails or busy herself with making some coffee. She’d clear her throat or suck her teeth, like something was stuck between them; like the truth. One day after filing her nails until perfectly round, pouring three cups of coffee and letting them sit until they were cold, she turned around to face me while leaning against the kitchen counter & folded her arms. “You know it’s true what they say…that books can’t teach you everything.” she said, looking at the floor. She looked up at me and continued “Because if they could, you’d be smart enough to see that my son doesn’t deserve a girl like you. Hell, I’m his mother and I love him, with all of me I do, but I know he’s never gonna be the man I want him to be….the kind of man you deserve. Why are you still here? You’re always here. He’s knows you’re here & he’s not even here! Doesn’t that tell you something?” She let out one of those laughs, the kind you let out when you’re convinced that what’s happening can’t be real; that it has to be a joke in order for it to make sense. I didn’t have an answer for her. Instead I moved my foot back & forth across the corner of one of the linoleum tiles on the kitchen floor that had started to lift. It made this low scraping sound that I pretended I didn’t hear. “These floors ain’t no good.” she said after realizing where the sound was coming from; “I swear any day it’ll give way right where you’re sitting.” and all of a sudden my foot stop moving because I know she wasn’t talking about the floor anymore; you remember what I said about foundations.

The chairs in the waiting room are cold & the plastic on them grabs on to your legs like it knows your secrets; what you did. I decided to stand after about 10 minutes of sitting. Nobody in the room wanted to be there. You could feel it. The receptionist kept checking the clock, then counting the people waiting with these sweeping head nods that scan the room. The medical assistant would walk in from the back of the office & sigh before calling the name of the next patient. One of the girls looked like she could be your cousin but that’s unlikely; your aunt had her on the pill as soon as she turned 15. “Listen you gotta take precaution with these young girls. I’m too young to have a grandchild & so was my mother when I had her.” I overheard her say one day when you left me in your bedroom to take a shower. It was summer time and we had just finished fucking. My skin was sticky and you’d just pushed me off of you to go shower. I turned over & laid there, letting anxiety set in. You came back in, still wet around the shoulders with the towel gripping your waist, & told me I should go home with your back to me. You were looking in the mirror brushing your hair toward your forehead. I went to the bathroom before I left; ran the water for a couple of seconds, cupped it in my hand and slushed it around my mouth, listening to it crash against my teeth and swollen bottom lip. You & blood never tasted good together.

You gotta understand that I never understood you. Now I know that it’s because there was nothing to figure out; to understand. Sometimes it’s easier to think someone is hiding some part of themselves from us; that we can get to that part if we stay long enough. In reality, it’s our own secrets & insecurities that make us believe that everyone must have them; that no one is truly transparent about their feelings. You were. When you said you couldn’t give me what I want, it wasn’t because you didn’t think you could. It was because you didn’t want to. In all honesty, I wish I could be like you; walking the earth needing & wanting for no one. Your mother told me you said you stopped saying “I love you too” when you realized that you were just saying it as a response & not because you meant it. It was never just a response for me.

They ask you if you want to see the embryo before you have the abortion. How stupid is that? Why would I want to see what I’m about to kill? So I can hate myself more? So I can think about not going through with it? Whatever the reason is, I declined the offer. It’s bad enough I dreamt about the baby ever by night. I imagined it’s face every day while I washed the dishes with my mother sitting at the kitchen table behind me, half watching/half staring at the news on the tv in the living room. “Why are you so quiet lately? You barely laugh when your brother tells those corny jokes you love so much.” she said once while she was waiting for the microwave to finish heating up her leftovers from the night before. I brushed her off, telling her I’ve just been thinking about “life”; you know like how mine would end if I told her I was pregnant.

She would have my eyes but your eyelashes because mine never curled up to the sun the way yours did. He would have your long legs but my muscles because you could never lift anything. She would have my shoulders because they’re the kind you can lean on. He would have your smile because it’s the kind that’s contagious. She would have my tenacity but your honesty because that’ll take her far, I think. He would have your curiosity, but my precaution. Then again that never helped me with you, so perhaps not. She would have my determination. He would have your arms but my hands because I can touch things and people without breaking them.

After they finished they asked me the obligatory “How are you feeling?”. I said I didn’t know because I honestly couldn’t feel anything. Physically, I felt the same as I did the day you didn’t pull out in time. I remember you breathing heavy, whispering “Ughh Shit!!” into the crook of my neck where your head always ended up. “My bad.”, you said after you’d caught your breath and for the first time I pushed you off of me, because it wasn’t your bad; it had never been your bad. It was always mine.

Testosterone Boys pt. 2

Reader x F*ckboi!Yoongi
SYNOPSIS:
An agreement of sorts is reached.
GENRE: Angst, Fluff.
WORD COUNT: 8.3k
PART 2 OF 2

(Second part to Testosterone Boys)

AN: the italics are a flashback lmao, just a quick head’s up! <3


Originally posted by kuromel


“I’m not playing, asshole. Give them to me.”  

Around this time is when people surrounding you guys including, Hoseok, Namjoon, and even Jimin started listening in on your conversation but you didn’t mind an audience. Oh no, you wanted the world to see you knock Kim Taehyung out cold.  

“I’m serious, babe. I don’t have your undies. I sure wish I did though, they were fucking adorable.”

“Alright, Tae. Humor me. If you don’t have them. Then who does?” You sighed. Your anger was at the back of your throat now and your fists clenched. You were sure your knuckles were almost white.

Taehyung laughed once again, bringing his fingers to your chin to turn your gaze to his.

“Min. Yoon. Gi.”


“What?” You scoffed, your eyes automatically rolling, “Yoongi doesn’t have my underwear. I just talked to him.”

“Are you sure? ‘Cause, I handed them over to him earlier. Lord knows how badly he wanted those. That pathetic little crush of his. On you! Of all people.” He sighed.  

His words might have hurt you if you were actually paying attention to them. But no, he lost you at “Pathetic little crush”. Yoongi had a crush on you? Min Yoongi? The Min Yoongi who skipped classes, or showed up high, fucking girls left and right Min Yoongi? Could have fooled you.  

You felt your face heat up. Of course, he was gorgeous and you’d be lying to yourself if you said you’d never thought of him in that light but he wasn’t your type… Was he? Did you even have a type? And if you did, did fuckboy fall into that category?

“Aw, don’t tell me. You have a crush on him as well? The good girl falling for the burnout. How 2003 chick flick of you both.”  

You winced at Taehyung’s tone. What happened to the nice, good guy he came off to be? Was that all just a facade? And you didn’t have a crush on Yoongi, did you? I mean, yeah, he looked amazing tonight and yeah, a butterfly or two may have fluttered around your chest any time he was near you, but that’s not a crush, right? That’s just how you felt around Yoongi normally.

You vaguely remembered one of the first times Yoongi spoke to you. You’d known of his reputation because who didn’t? Not that it ever mattered to anyways. Honestly, you didn’t care if he slept around or smoked pot all day. That was his business and if he treated you with respect, then you’d treat him nicely back. Simple as that.  

It was your Sophomore year, nearly two years ago that you met Min Yoongi in your world literature class. Of course, he was failing and of course you were top ranked so it was a no-brainer to the teacher for you to stay after class and tutor him; everyday.

Keep reading

Well, Shit. (A Voltron Fanfiction: Chapter 2)

Here is Chapter 2! I haven’t started on Chapter 3 yet but I promise it is on the way! I’m SO SORRY FOR THE CLIFFHANGER THE LAST TIME. Hopefully the ending to this chapter isn’t as bad? Maybe! Anyway! Enjoy!

Want to read the first chapter? Here you go!

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/156859812181/well-shit-a-voltron-fanficiton

CHAPTER 3 IS HERE: 

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157047198811/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-3

SO IS CHAPTER 4:

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157157013206/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-4

AND CHAPTER 5:

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157254073496/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-5

AND CHAPTER 6:

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157296304031/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-6

AND CHAPTER 7!

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157378879001/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-7

CHAPTER 8:

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157547824756/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-8

CHAPTER 9:

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157710839871/well-shit-a-voltron-fanfiction-chapter-9

CHAPTER 10:

http://violaswimmer.tumblr.com/post/157841715481/well-shit-a-voltron-fanficition-chapter-10

Lance is left behind on the Galra ship with Prince Lotor as his personal torturer. Lance isn’t holding up well and the rest of the team have to act fast if they want to save him in time. 

Chapter 2: Well, What the Hell.

It had been a long time. Or it felt like a long time. But the steel that had covered Lance’s emotions was still there even though he was sure that his body could take no more.

Prince Lotor visited Lance often. He shoved tiny metallic needles into every place he could think of. The needles had long thin tubes attached to them. They could send electricity or drugs through them into Lance. Both were extremely painful but between the two, Lance would take electricity any day. Sure it messed up his body but the drugs, they were worse. Lance would be seizing in pain for hours unable to think, hear, and barely able to breathe. It felt like someone was pushing on his chest, stabbing every part of his body while burning it at the same time. After every session Lotor would ask him questions which Lance either answered with snide remarks or nothing at all. But Lance’s lack of cooperation made Lotor even more excited.

Lance had learned this: Prince Lotor is nothing like his father. Sure Zarkon was scary but he wasn’t very patient. He would rather fight head on than take the time to plan every detail. But Lotor, Lotor could wait and that was even more frightening. He was methodical and manipulative. Crazy and smart. In some ways he was definitely worse than Zarkon ever was.

Lance was aware that his body was getting worse, the cut on his head also come with a sizable bump which throbbed like a never ending drum beat on his skull. The vision in his left eye was completely gone now although he was getting used to it. His back hurt and itched all the time. The skin on his back was rough from the burns and every small twitch was agony. His hands and arms were littered with small deep cuts from the needles. Some were healing while others were new, blood dripping onto the floor. He couldn’t feel his legs anymore. He was in a constant state of pain and numb but it didn’t bother him much anymore. The pain kept him awake and aware. If he was getting out of this, and that’s a big if, then he’d bring back with information of his own.

Lance had gathered this about Lotor:

 1. He was Zarkon’s son that Zarkon didn’t like very much

2. He was on his way to meeting the witch druid lady after Voltron beat Zarkon’s ass in that last fight

3. He had a harem of aliens 

4. He was really creepily obsessed with Allura.

 Lance himself was obsessed with Allura cause she’s beautiful but not like this guy. If he got out of this he was going to apologize from every flirty thing he ever said to her.

But right now he was more concerned about the Lotor in front of him. The weird thing was that Lance was pretty sure he was hallucinating or dreaming. Lance couldn’t really tell which, if there was even a difference.

“Your team abandoned you. They’re never coming back.” Lotor said.

Lance shook his head, it throbbed painfully but the pain kept him awake. It kept him sane.

“Why would they? You’re just the jokester. The comic relief. You don’t have a special skill. You’re nothing to them! You’ve said it before! Shiro is the leader. Keith is his favorite and the best pilot of his generation! Compared to him you’re nothing but a cheap replacement for him, for Shiro’s favorite pet! Hunk is a genius and a kind soul. He deserves a better friend than you. And Pidge? She’s the smartest person, a genius beyond her age! Allura is the princess and the only one who can control the castle. Coran is the only one who can take care of the castle, he’s smart and kind. They all have their thing. They all have a purpose. But you don’t. You’re worthless.” Lotor spat at him, enraged.

Slowly his face began to change. Lotor quickly faded away and was being replaced by someone else. Himself. Lance was staring at himself. He was going crazy. The hallucination shouted at him, continuing to yell all the thoughts that Lance had kept under check. That Lance had tried to conceal.

WHY DO YOU EVEN BOTHER TRYING TO PROTECT THEM?! They haven’t done anything for you! They tell you to SHUT UP, to FOCUS, they don’t WANT you! They don’t even NEED YOU! GIVE IN! YOU WOULD BE BETTER OFF DEAD!!

Lance tried to shut him out. But how many times had he stared at his own face. How many times had his own face yelled his worse fears? I guess this is a new way to look at the phrase beating yourself up, Lance let out a small laugh. Then the laugh grew louder. And the worst part was it that he couldn’t tell if he was laughing or crying. But he said nothing back. He just laughed and laughed as tears streamed down his face.



Keith was pissed. It had been one week and three days since they left Lance behind on a galra ship where they were doing god-knows-what to him right now. Keith had never NOT liked Lance, in fact he’d say they were friends, although he knew Lance wouldn’t say the same.

Keith had been concerned for weeks before they left Lance behind. Maybe months. Ever since the wormhole gone wrong when the lions were split up. Lance had become quieter, didn’t say as much, and didn’t joke as must. He lashed out at Shiro during the mission where Keith learned about his past and being part galra. But afterwards when he confessed to the group Lance was the first person to tell him it was fine, the first one to say anything.

“Yeah so what?” Lance said, standing up from the table.

Keith was shocked, honestly with the way things had been going between the two of them he expected something else.

What? This is serious! I’m part Galra, like the species that ruined the whole universe.” Keith practically shouted.

Lance looked unfazed.

“Well yeah but you’re still Keith, you have been the entire time. It’s not like you’re any different then you were before. You’re still the best pilot with a stupid ass mullet. It’s just that you know more about yourself now. So like, congrats I guess.” Lance smiled.

He walked away from the table waved to the rest of the stunned faces around the table.

“I’m gonna take a swim, you guys have fun getting over your angst!” Lance shouted over his shoulder while he left the room entirely.

After that they were fine for the most part, Keith hadn’t thanked him though. He regretted that now. After that Shiro had gone missing. Keith was in shock he couldn’t think but Lance had grabbed him by the shoulders and turned him to face him directly.

“Keith, I know you don’t want to think about it right now but you’re the leader now. We need to focus. We’ll find Shiro, don’t worry too much.” He said. 

Yeah they had butt heads and thank god Keith didn’t need to be leader long, they found Shiro after three days, but Lance was still quiet and still not himself. Keith was worried. But he never said anything, never talked to him. They were always doing something else, after this mission I’ll talk to him, but something always came up. Always.

That’s what Keith most regretted. Or maybe it was the look on Lance’s face when he threw him and Pidge over the edge into the vent before the ship exploded. Lance’s face was expressionless, eyes hard and smile sad. He knew exactly what he was doing and Keith hated it. He was an idiot. Now he had to get him back.

It wasn’t like they were sitting around sulking this entire time but Allura had insisted that this time they needed help, allies that could help bring Lance back. They needed ships and plans. But it had been too long, it was taking too much time.

Keith barged into dining room where everyone was gathered discussing something that was related to the plan to get Lance back. Hunk was pale as he was these past several days, worry had etched wrinkles into his forehead that never went away. Pidge was concentrated on the details refusing to think of anything else so her mind didn’t wander to places that she’s rather not think about. Shiro had his full attention on Allura and Coran but he wore a frown that had not strayed from his face. They looked over at Keith, shocked as he slammed his hands on the table.

“WHAT THE HELL ARE WE DOING?!” He shouted.

Everyone looked back shocked, Allura was staring at him looking a little scared, Shiro and Coran were stunned into silence, Pidge and Hunk looked concerned.

“What-what do you mea-?” Allura began before Keith slammed his hands back down on the table.

“I mean that Lance is on a Galra ship and has been for a week and three days suffering god-knows-what and the hands of some asshole and we are just sitting here coming up with plans!” Keith paused to release a breath before continuing hopefully sounding a bit calmer, “Why did you order us to fall back? Why did we abandon him? Why do we need allies to take down a small fleet when we have never had trouble doing that before?” Keith asked, he was practically pleading with her.

Now everyone was looking at Allura, even Coran looked at her with curiosity. Allura’s breath hitched a bit but she took another breath that went down a bit smoother. Keith didn’t like being so aggressive but he was pissed and needed to know.

Allura swallowed before she spoke.

“The reason that we needed to leave is because I recognized the ship that was taking Lance. It was the ship belonging to Prince Lotor.” She said.

Coran gasped, finally understanding.

Pidge spoke quickly, “Who the hell is Prince Lotor?”

“Pidge, language.” Shiro said softly.

She let out a huff. Muttering under her breath about Keith saying the words ‘asshole’ and ‘hell’ two seconds ago. Shiro ignored her.

Allura continued.

“Prince Lotor is Zarkon’s son, although I understand that they were not close. When Zarkon was the black paladin, he and my father were close. It was natural that the children of said men would play together. Lotor was a kind child at first. We rather liked playing together. But something changed in Lotor, he became disturbed as he got older.” She took a breath before continuing, “He would, torture creatures. He said he was playing with them but I knew what he was doing. One day he killed a child we were playing with. He claimed it to be an accident but we knew better.” She paused.

“Obviously Lotor was sent away from his father to a faraway planet that helped Galra who were too aggressive or that is what Zarkon claimed. That’s where Lotor stayed. I heard it only got worse from there. However Zarkon was also acting strangely and then he betrayed the paladins. I was told he began to change after his wife, Prince Lotor’s mother, died.” Allura finished.

“After we awoke from our 10,000 year sleep I tried to catch myself up on all I could. I learned about Zarkon as best I could and Lotor. He has become ruthless. Kidnapped species all over the galaxy to keep as glorified pets. Tortured prisoners, disobeyed every order Zarkon ever gave him, was given his own fleet which is known for not losing a single battle. In some galaxies Lotor is known as the planet killer. So that day we… left Lance I knew we couldn’t fight him, down one paladin and already under attack. So I ordered us to fall back. If we can get a few more allies to stand with us we can take him long enough to get Lance off that ship and back home.” Allura said looking into Keith’s eyes.

“I beg you, give me a few more days. We will save him and bring him home. I promise.” Allura looked each and every one of them in the eye making sure they knew exactly how serious she was. Keith’s only concern was if Lance could last that long.

A lot of these posts “””defending””” Molly Hooper after that last episode are really rubbing me up the wrong way, because I swear NONE of y’all have given a single shit about Molly until now. I’ve had to endure 3 years of people saying it’s “pathetic” that Molly slapped Sherlock because he “didn’t return her feelings” (WHICH IS NOT WHY SHE HIT HIM OH MY GOD), and I’ve had to listen to people say her silly crush on Sherlock is embarrassing or that she needs to grow up and move on. Even when she’s been praised, she hasn’t been praised as an engaging and interesting character, as the sweet, kind and intelligent young pathologist she is, she’s been praised because she allegedly serves as a prop to further a relationship between two gay men. Which - guess what guys, IS NOT PROGRESSIVE. 

But oh, now that her feelings have finally been vindicated, now suddenly it’s poor Molly and Molly deserves better. But listen. I’m the first person to say that Sherlock’s got major problems with writing women. Ask me about Mary’s fridging sometime. And yes, I wish to God Molly had more screentime, but this idea that her final scene is about glamorising abusive relationships or that Molly was nothing but a prop is killing me.

Do you know what I saw when I watched that scene with Eurus and Molly?

I saw a character who had undergone tremendous growth over the past four seasons. Originally intended as a one-off, but so spellbindingly brought to life by Loo Brealey that she was made a non-canon recurring character, Molly has grown from timid, mousy and submissive to a woman more than willing to stand up for herself, whose kindness is her strength and whose love was the undoing of Moriarty. She’s smart - she’s the literal embodiment of medical and pathological knowledge in Sherlock’s mind palace. She proved you can be soft and strong, that vulnerability doesn’t have to mean weakness, and that you can stand up to someone and demand better treatment in a gentle voice. 

And, God forbid, she’s also in love with a man. But she’s never been given the opportunity to say so. Her feelings, which have been a strength and a weakness, are visible enough to us and everyone in the show, but she’s never said it out loud. 

Now, truth in fiction is a rare substance. It always takes a tremendous amount of pressure for two people to be completely honest with each other, especially if that truth concerns feelings of love. The question, “what will it take to make Molly tell Sherlock she loves him?” is answered in this scene. And the answer is: Sherlock needs to say I love you first. 

And do you know who was in control in that scene? Molly. Every single step of the way. At any moment she could have told Sherlock to stick it up his arse and hung up. There would have been no repercussions for her. Sherlock tries in myriad ways to get an I love you and she blocks him every time, says “leave me alone,” tells him she won’t let him make fun of her, tells him she’s not an experiment. She hasn’t been treated well by Sherlock and John this season, is still grieving over Mary, is probably suffering depression, and she’s sick of Sherlock’s nonsense. She’s willing to help if it’s urgent, but she’s done playing games. 

She tells him she can’t say it because it’s true. It’s always been true. She’s always loved him. Do you have any idea how long we’ve waited for her feelings to be validated? At last, no, it’s not a stupid girlish crush, it’s not infatuation, it’s a beautiful, selfless love that she cherishes for him. She loves this man. She saved his life. She stood up to him. She refused to tolerate shabby treatment from him. She was happy to be his friend. She moved on and found a new man, but when Sherlock came back, she had to be honest with herself, and she decided it would be better to be alone than marry a man she doesn’t really love. She is so brave, and so selfless, and she’s never once made her feelings his problem. That’s why she begs him - don’t make me say it because it’s true, it’s always been true.  

And then, still feeling like this must be a game somehow, she challenges him to say it first. Go on. If you want me to make a fool of myself, then you have to go first. I’m not jumping until you do. Molly can see through him; he can’t manipulate her like he did in S1. She’s not that person anymore. And he’s not that person anymore, either. Eurus didn’t rig Molly’s flat with explosives, and Sherlock didn’t win when he supposedly saved her life, because it wasn’t about that. It was about torturing Sherlock emotionally, and where once he manipulated her without a second thought, hurting Molly now is like vivisection to him. Eurus - Molly - both get him to admit “I love you” - twice. Once, because he was trying to save her life - the second time because he realised it was true. As a friend, or something more, who even cares, he loves her and he realises just how much. 

And still, Molly is in control. She can hang up, if she wants. She contemplates it. But then, almost kissing the phone, perhaps having recognised the note of sincerity in his voice, she whispers, I love you.

Too often an unrequited crush ends when a character suddenly finds a new man or woman, falls in love, and gets over their old feelings, and has a happily ever after with this random new person. But I’ve always found that maddeningly dissatisfying, and even though it comes from horrific circumstances, I’m so glad that Molly’s feelings were validated, not because Sherlock returned them, but simply because those feelings are hers, and they are real, they’ve always been real, and it hurts, god it hurts, but at least she was able to be honest. The cut has been made, the truth is revealed, and now she can begin to heal. She doesn’t have to keep those words festering inside her. Molly loves Sherlock, and it took him telling her he loved her to admit that. 

And Sherlock’s a wreck afterwards. He caresses those words “I love you” and thinks about how he always believed caring was not an advantage. He thinks about selfless, kind Molly Hooper, who had always loved him, and saved him, whose love was her strength, whose love was doomed, who would not suppress or deny her feelings, but merely kept them to herself to spare him discomfort and then - 

He thinks about Molly in that coffin. He thinks about losing her. He thinks about what he’s just said to her. He thinks of how he’s hurt her.

No.

He loses control. Always, he’s pretended to be pure intellect, has always clung to rationality, but in this moment he is nothing but emotion. Rage, pain, fear, sadness, needing to destroy this coffin, smashing it to pieces, screaming in agony because of how much he feels for this woman. 

Molly loves Sherlock. We’ve known for a long time. And I truly feel that Molly being allowed to own those feelings, because they are hers, regardless of whether they are reciprocated or not, is far more powerful than sweeping them under the rug and pretending they never existed or that she got over them just fine. This is how she feels, and no she won’t tolerate poor treatment because of them, and no she won’t put up with him playing games, but yes - she will be there when he needs her, because that’s just who she is. 

Firsts

So I wrote this fanfiction about a week ago, but I wanted to wait to read the new chapter to add the final details. However, yesterday I was too shocked to write anything, and I finished this today. Hope you like it. This is basically Touken’s journey from Kaneki’s POV. You can also read it here.

Summary: Touka is not the first girl Kaneki likes, but she’s the first girl he loves.

1.

Touka is not the first girl that Kaneki likes. She is definitely not the first one to catch his interest. There were others before her. He does think she’s cute when Hide points to her at the coffee shop, so long ago it seems like centuries have passed. But, although she is attractive, he has his eyes set on another girl, who unknowingly sets his life spiraling towards the path of tragedy.

Kamishiro Rize is both beautiful and smart. And she likes the same books as Kaneki does. Not to mention, she accepts going on a date with him. Kaneki is not hopeless anymore. And he thinks this could be the start of something new, until she corners him on an empty alley and tries to eat him.

His life changes forever.

Keep reading

Boys (S.D.R. x Reader)

AN: there might be a part two? Maybe. We’ll see. 

Tag Crew: @artisticgamer @huffleheyguys @theoverlordofeverything @hmltntrsh51 @iamnotthrowingawaymyshit2

Request: @megabooklover18 - Then could I request the democratic republicansx reader where one of them accidentally punched the reader and then they panic and go into mother hen mode?

Warning: fuck boys 

Word Count: 1,688

Masterlist

You and the boys were sprawled out on the lawn of the courtyard relaxing after class. This week, all of your schedules were filled with free periods due to the three day long talent show of sorts that your school put on every year before break. All of these free periods meant more time with your boys, which you greatly appreciated. Everyone was grateful for the easy week, with a few exceptions.

Keep reading

so cold 01 / min yoongi

Originally posted by loveblushes

part 02 part 03

requested by @ jiminieechim

summary: you’re in love with bff yoongi but as soon as you tell him he starts acting cold and keeps on rejecting you. 

note: I’m making this into 3 parts so each part will have it’s own summary

note2: I changed it a bit around hope that’s okay 

enjoy reading!



‘how to love someone you can never have?’ you typed this sentence in the search bar at least 100 times today but nothing good popped up, just a bunch of stupid articles that talked about nonsense.

this type of question was on your mind 24/7 for the past couple of weeks. 

see the problem is that this person is your best friend.

best friend

the word rang in your ears and you couldn’t get rid of it. no matter what you tried it didn’t work. you tried liking many other guys from your school but no one is as reliable, trustful, smart and handsome as Min Yoongi. yup that was his name. you sometimes wished you didn’t even met him in the first place because you wouldn’t worry so much. but how could you know?

when you two met you didn’t feel anything towards him. not even the fact that he’s handsome while all the other girls drooled over him. you met him at a bar while you were crying because your ex boyfriend stood you up. you didn’t have a ride back home so he nicely drove you. he didn’t even feel like a stranger but as if you two knew each other all your life. you two clicked instantly. and soon you became best friends. you never thought of him as more than a friend, so when the feelings came in you tried pushing them away but it didn’t work. you don’t know what it is but he’s just different. a good kind of different, taking care of you in bad and good times, a shoulder to cry on someone to trust. but damn it, sometimes you wished quietly to yourself you could kiss him. however you knew that if you tell him this it could either end your friendship or it could be the start of something new.

but this was the day you decided that you were finally going to confess. you knew someday you would have to or it could kill you inside. so you took your phone from the night stand and quickly typing a text sending it to him.

You:  got time? need 2 talk 2 u

Your heart skipped a beat, after just a few seconds he replied back.

SUGA: yup coming

quickly locking the phone and throwing it on the bed you jumped to your closet searching for something better to wear. usually you don’t care how you look in front of him : without makeup, sweatpants and a hoodie. however today you wanted to look more presentable, popping on black ripped jeans which were his favorite, he always complimented your legs and how sexy they look but of course you took that as a best friend compliment and nothing more.

that was also something you liked about Yoongi. him being so nice and always giving you compliments and making you feel better. he never once let you down and neither did you.

finishing your outfit you put on a white tank top and sat down on the bed waiting for him. you didn’t lock the door to your dorm which practically you never do. except at nights and when your out but you know that Yoongi will come in barging whenever he likes.

“y/n!!!!” you heared your name been yelled from miles away. it was his voice screaming at the top of his lungs until you would answer but you didn’t. you were to busy laughing at the same time fiddling with your fingers because you were nervous. 

“hey why won’t you answer i yelled your name 5000 times” he said opening the door plopping right beside you putting his hand on your shoulder. his touch felt amazing it gave you goosebumps but you quickly pushed it away moving back a bit.

“what’s wrong?” he said with a pouty face realizing you acting weirdly.

“if it’s about the cookies I’m sorry I ate all of them but they were so fucking good” you couldn’t help but to laugh at the sentence. how you wished it could be that but it wasn’t. the moment was here and you need to do it now. right now at this very minute telling him and that’s it. fighting back at your own words you mentally curse at yourself getting ready for the confession.

“no it’s not that don’t worry about it…but i do have to tell you something and…” you trailed of looking down on the floor not being able to look up to his eyes. and when he lifted your chin up with his fingers you closed your eyes still not looking at him.

“y/n…what’s up tell me please I hate seeing you like this, you know you can tell me everything right?” you simply nodded at his comment biting at your lip scared of everything.

‘’I’m….’’ you started off but as soon as you said that tears started streaming down your face. you tried so hard to fight them back the more you thought about him the more tears you spilled. he took your hand in his tracing his fingers over your hands, giving you a few squeezes.

“wow okay this is something serious y/n calm down okay? whatever it is it can’t be that bad’’

‘’but it is…you’re so going to hate me for this I just know it..’’

‘’hate you? I can never hate you y/n’’  

thinking still if you’re going to tell him or just keep it to yourself, but it hurt so bad. he was your best friend if you lose him you lose everything. he’s like a anchor to you, bringing you up whenever you’re down lost in your own world.

‘’okay…here I go..’’ you started off as the last tear slipped by you wiped it away with your hand and Yoongi moved a bit closer to you.

‘’I’m…’’

‘’you?’’

‘’I’m…um..i’m in love with you..’’

there. the words have been spoken, those hard words that you’ve been anticipating to tell him. closing your eyes again you could feel his hand slip out of yours and you felt emptiness. you knew what you just said is something that he didn’t want to hear.

‘’say something please…’’

‘’what?! what I’m a supposed to say huh? what the actual fuck y/n?! You’re in love with me?!’’ he yelled at the top of his lungs just like he yelled out your name minutes before. you were shocked not expecting what he had just said to you. I mean you did fear rejection but not in this kind of way. so cold.

you stood up from your bed and running to the bathroom putting your hands on the sink looking up to the mirror. eyes swollen, lips swollen you were a crying mess. opening the water you splashed your face with cold water trying to push the thoughts away and the words he had spoken. a few seconds later you hear the door slamming and you knew he just left.

what are you going to do now? you just lost someone you cared so much for, maybe you shouldn’t have said anything and just move on. but it’s hard loving someone you can never have.

A Higher Education PT.2

Summary: Shawn and yourself are best friends at University.

Word Count:  6,293

A/U: So happy with all of the support from you all. I’m really enjoying writing this so I think instead of three parts I will be doing four. But nothing more than that. ENJOY!

Your name: submit What is this?


“Yeah well just text me when you want us to come over?” I said as I pulled out my notebook.

We were sitting in the second row out of my choosing and because I had shown up early to get a good seat. I liked the third row because you were close enough for the prof to know your face but not too close for him to ask you questions.

“Excuse me?” I heard a voice coming from next to Shawn. I glanced over and saw the girl in the row up from us leaning over the seats, her long hair falling near Shawn and she pushed it back behind one ear. “I wasn’t here last class, do you think I could get a picture of your notes?”

My eyes narrowed automatically. First, most of the power points were online, you could sufficiently catch up by just reading them alone and supplementing with the textbook, second why didn’t she ask the people next to her and third, why was her smile so fucking big?

“Oh yeah for sure, but my writing is terrible? Maybe you might want to ask someone else?”  Shawn answered

Yeah, maybe you should ask someone fucking else.

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