like inside the store

Customer service is fucking wild dude. I had a woman call saying the store “disappeared”

We’ve been the same building for the past 30-odd years.

And I wasn’t even fazed, because people have said way dumber shit to me at this job. I was like “ma'am I’m inside the store right now. I can assure you we haven’t disappeared.”

She made a confused noise and hung up.

 If there was a zombie apocalypse the best place to go would be Target.

Lets look at the facts:

  • Targets have at maximum 3 windows. And those windows are also doors. Otherwise they are giant concrete cinder-blocks of prison like retail. 
  • Target is filled with things to quickly barricade those window-doors. such as entire gazebos, lawn furniture, exercise equipment, etc. 
  • From that point forward all you have to do is worry about the zombies that are inside.
  • Target has an intercom system, which if accessed by the correct people can be used to quickly spread information and mobilize people to get things done. 
  • Target has a large section of both perishable and non perishable food items. 
  • Target also has a vast entertainment section. (how many societies have collapsed due to conflict spurred by stress and boredom. HOW MANY)
  • Target’s roof can be easily accessed for surveillance, gathering of rainwater (with the many buckets and mini pools target has. and all water can be boiled in the Starbucks kitchen) and sniping.
  • Target’s insulation would make the harsh winter months significantly more bearable.
  • Before the power goes out, Target has sun lights (which is why its not sad inside like in so many other stores… cough Sears cough) so people who have SAD won’t get depressed. Also, Target is large and designed to feel homey so people wont go stir crazy as fast like they do in jails.
  • When the power goes out, Target has large industrial generators that can be turned on in emergencies like for cooking. 
  • Speaking of cooking, Target has several kitchens inside of it. And once the power goes, guess what Target also sells? Grills. 
  • Target also has a pharmacy. And medical supplies. So, people inside who need meds to function have a hell of a lot longer time to live unencumbered by their illness than they normally would. 
  • Some targets have tools–including power tools.
  • Target also has a tiny jail. For miscreants and rabble rousers.
  • Bedding. Real Bedding
  • Reliable indoor plumbing.

I think you could reasonably live for at least two years inside a Target before completely running out of anything vital– provided food is well rationed.
And even so, the only thing you’d be sending out scouts for is food. Everything else would last for ages.  

Provided that the population not exceed 200, Target would run out of these things in this order:

  1. perishable food.
  2. electricity
  3. Potable water (that doesn’t require work)
  4. Non perishable pre-made food items
  5. Non perishable food ingredients (flour, mixes, etc)

    How to survive in a Target: Action plan.

    Undoubtedly, everyone will be rushing and screaming in the Target. First someone has to break into the manager’s office and commandeer the intercom to create some organization by shouting: If you do not want to stay and survive in the Target, leave now. 

    After that’s cleared up and only interested parties and zombies are left. the barricading can begin. Once the doors and windows are sealed, the new goal is to clear the undead from the usable space.The undead can be deposited neatly outside of the truck loading dock doors.

    Then, someone needs to do inventory. For the next week or so, food needs to be arranged by date consumed and a rationing chart should be made. Same applies to medicine and medical supplies and toiletries.

    After food and water has been qualified and quantified,  remaining time should be dedicated to turning target into a large “home”, Bedding should be laid out in one area, there should be an entertainment area. There should be a separate area for children and babies. All of the clothing should be pushed to the side or placed in the storage area, so there is more livable space. 

    I’m sure people have more ideas but that’s all I’ve got.

This has been brought to you with love by,

Not gonna die. 

Shopping Partner

Summary: In an attempt to ask you out on a date, you help Bucky pick out the perfect outfit for the occasion.

Prompt: “Tell me, can your dick even breathe in those pants?”

Word Count: 1,353.

A/N: This is my entry for @bladebarnes ’s writing challenge!! This was super cute to write and I hope you all enjoy. Also, took some inspo from @brighterlights‘s fic, “Personal Shopper”.

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anonymous asked:

OK this may sound odd but what fabric shops would you recommend in the LA area. I know you no longer live here but any advice helps, since joanns does have its limits in fabric options and in your experience is it any cheaper than Joanns or am I paying just as much?

The garmet district is what you want to do. 

Shopping in LA Fabric District

What you want to do is – HIT UP MICHAEL LEVINES FIRST BUT DONT BUY ANYTHING. Maybe pick up your pattern. Check out how much fabric you need according to the pattern, etc etc. Search the store for the fabric you need, even if you see a perfect match, leave it, don’t buy it. Trust meeeee. You’re basically making this your garaunteed last resort. I know it already seems a great deal compared to Joanns’ money grubbing prices, but trust me.

Head out to the streets and start walking up and down 9th. From Maple to San Pedro. CHECK EVERYWHERE. North shops usually have the best SPANDEX and stretch fabrics, lace and sequins. SOUTH shops usually have upholestry, leather and vinyl (there’s exceptions but this is what I noticed.) 

I garauntee you any stock of fabric at Levines is avaliable in all the surrounding stores and they will sell it way short for a bargain! 

PROTIP: Never say yes first. If you ask one of the workers in the off stores “How much is this a yard?” and they say “12,” even if thats an amazing price, still just nod and say “Thanks” and start walking away like you dont want it. They WILL ALWAYS go lower. They’ll start telling you “11! 10– 8 for you!” Especially if they know you want 2-3 yrds or more.  But don’t get intimidated either, they’ll try to corner you into saying yes. Just wave them off, tell them “Ill take a picture and come back? I just wanna compare.”  Seriously, even if you see the perfect one at one of these places for the best price, just wait until you hit all the stores. You have no idea how many times i bought something and regretted it 5 minutes later when I saw an even better version. 

Second Protip: When they ask you how many yard you want, always say 2-3. Even if you need seven. Because they’ll give it to you for cheaper if you only want that much. Then when you say, okay, ill buy it for 4 bucks a yard, as he’s measuring it out, then say “ACTUALLY can I get 5?” 

Here’s some of my favorites:

L.A. Alex has the CHEAPEST notions. Zippers, elastic, velcros, thread, muslin, etc. They are AWESOME for all extra stuff you need. Way cheap. 

JOURNAL has some of the most interesting fabric on the block, unique textiles like dancewear or lace, usually exclusive to them. This is where I found that rare ass pre-pleated suede fabric for Kylo Ren’s sleeves and the awesome shimmer-non-sparkle spandex for Miraculous Ladybug. 

.99 Fabric a yard. Literally as it says. 99cents a yard biittcchhh. I ALWAYS hit this place up because you always need cheap ass broadcloth, poplin, CHIFFON or Taffeta. He’s got it all man. Its awesome for basic shit. 

City Fabric has the best FUR and FLEECE selection you’ve ever seen. 

Mora Tex is a favorite of mine. The guy here loves cosplayers and the fabric I get here is always rich and stunning looking. I bought my Astrologian Velvet, Dishonored purple and grey suede. Kylo’s outer tunic, Rey’s tunic and shoe wool, Lavellan’s trespasser tunic, and so much NICE suiting. Basically any heavier, richer type fabrics you can probably find here. 

Trim 2000 Plus is the place I found my Inquistor buttons. This place is like a gold mine for buttons. They have the most interesting shit for super cheap. I spent like 5 bucks on both Emily and Corvos diamond cufflinks and royal button getup here.

Jerry’s all Trims. My favorite trim store!!!  He has everything! Belts too! Great for any trims, tassles, or piping you made need. AND HE LETS YOU BUY THE WHOLE ROLL OR BY YARD. I bought all the leather cord here for our Solas necklaces. And every gold piece of my Astrologian cosplay.

SOME TECHNICAL ISSUES:

-Parking in LA FABRIC district is hell on earth. The spots up by Jerry’s All trims is my secret spot, those are usually free (2 hr maximum). You can check side spots too, like between maple and san pedro, but don’t feel bad about pulling into a parking structure and paying the 7 bucks. Its not so bad. 

-Stores close around 6:00 on weekdays and saturdays. 

-WHILE PARKING IS FREE ON SUNDAY. A lot of these shops aren’t open. LA Alex and the the button store are closed for example. Button store is also closed mondays for some reason? AND EVERYTHING CLOSES BY 4 ON SUNDAY. 

-AWAYS bring cash. Lots of stores don’t take card. Or they will charge you extra for using it. There are ATMs inside some stores. But the service fee is like 3-5 bucks. YUCK. 

-Theres a random costume shop on 9th street that sells gloves. SKIP THIS. I know your tempted to buy everything at once, but this guy is way overpriced. Order your gloves on ebay for $1, trust me. 

-Best time to go is in the morning on a weekday, if you can manage it. Saturdays are hecka busy but that sometimes it a great thing cause the shops are ready to bargain.

-North of San pedro is NOT A GOOD AREA. Don’t park there. And if you’re leaving to go to Little Tokyo afterwards, turn around, take another street. 

Sugar Sweet | 3 | (M)

word count: 5.1k

genre: smut + fluff; college AU + fuckboy!kihyun

pairing: reader/kihyun

summary: your best friend & roommate changkyun just wanted to help get you laid. instead you found solace in a pink haired man named kihyun who had a smart mouth with sharp words you weren’t afraid to let cut you, as long as he didn’t mind you hurting him a little too.

a/n: there’s no actual smut in this chapter, just lots of talk about it along with seriously suggestive things, but it’ll be in the next one! thank you so much for the support and love for SS so far!!  ♡ ♡ ♡

part 1 | part 2 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7

masterlist

Keep reading

My favorite items in the QM Store

We all know the most cursed episode of Camp Camp was Season 2, Episode 6 - Quartermaster Appreciation Day okay, but anyways lets take a closer look @ whats inside QM’s store

like this:

Important.

“Ass Meat”

what are those poor kids being fed??

QM has his own Conspiracy theory wall.

David made him this and you can’t tell me otherwise.

“The master must not be made whole again.”

b y e.

Gabriel’s Secret

gif is not mine

Title: Gabriel’s Secret

Pairing: Gabriel x Reader

Word Count: 577

Warnings: fluff

A/N: I hope you all enjoy this! Feedback is welcomed and appreciated! I love you all so much! <3

This was requested by an anon: Hello! So I had an idea with Lucifer or Gabriel. An imagine of them in a Victoria secret with or without the reader (buying stuff for the reader

Gabriel watched you as you got ready for the day.  You weren’t going on a case, but you were going to be out for a few hours getting things that the bunker needed.  Someone had to buy the toilet paper and toothpaste around here.  You didn’t mind doing the shopping, you found it refreshing.  It gave you a sense of normalcy.

You grabbed your purse and the keys to a car in the garage.  You glanced up, noticing the mysterious look Gabriel was giving you.  “Something wrong Gabe,” you wondered, lacing up your shoes.

“I just wanted you to know that I’ll be back later.  I have some angel stuff to do,” Gabriel lied.  He padded up to you, pressing a kiss to the side of your head.  “Be safe [Y/N].”

Keep reading

part 6 is LONG and i have never written anything this angsty but i saw spiderman again today and that scene™ made me so emotional that this was the result! i hope you enjoy xx

if you’ve never read this series, you can find part 1 here, and if you missed part 5, you can find it here!

  • now that peter and michelle are dating, ned isn’t the only chair guy around
  • michelle has taken to helping both ned and peter with spidey duties
  • she even convinced may to let them use the linen closet in the living room as a “headquarters” for them, as long as they close the door when guests are around and go along with the idea that “peter accidentally sealed it shut as a kid” 
  • peter doesn’t know how she did it, she and ned found old computer pieces lying around in dumpsters and somehow made in that linen closet, 3 computer monitors, 2 keyboards, 2 headsets, and more. 
  • it even impressed tony stark when he came to check in on peter and may
  • and oh boy did may yell at him
  • but then tony mentioned his connections with MIT and well, peter brings brownies to tony and pepper quite often now
  • one day while May is at work, Peter and MJ are watching a history documentary. 
  • MJ is lying across Peter’s lap and is so focused on the untold stories of ancient civilization when the linen closet beeps
  • and suddenly Peter’s burrito is flying and MJ jumps over the couch and opens the closet and starts typing away
  • “w-what? the burrito!” peter starts to protest but MJ waves him off. 
  • “we got a hostage situation near the high school,” she pulls a chair up. she managed to hack into police coms a few weeks ago, and even Ned was impressed on that one.
  • “how many?” peter now hops over the couch and leans over behind her, resting his chin on her head.
  • “not a lot…about eight according to the police coms. i can’t tell what building it is, the map isn’t clear-” she opens her palm and peter knows to drop his phone in her hand, and suddenly ned is on the line
  • “MJ…why don’t you just call me from your phone? you have my number?-”
  • “shut it loser. we got a hostage situation near school and i need my chair partner.” 
  • “be there in 10″ and ned hangs up and MJ tosses the phone up to Peter, who catches it no problem
  • “karen, run facial recognition,” peter says, and MJ looks confused. 
  • “who the hell is-” she starts but is cut off when the third screen lights up with a criminal database.
  • “i hacked karen into the system when you went to get the burritos,” he mumbles into her hair. “she’s an AI tony had made.” 
  • michelle nods and then peter is laughing into her hair. “what parker?” she goes to shrug him off, but peter spins her chair around to face him
  • “you were jealous,” he’s smug.
  • “was not-” she goes to turn around but peter raises his eyebrows. “i don’t get jealous.”
  • “mhmm,” peter says before kissing her quickly and MJ rolls her eyes. again, a term of endearment. 
  • “suit up spidey boy,” she turns back to the screens, and ignores peter’s, “but i’m spiderman!” in the background 
  • it takes ned less than 10 minutes to burst through the door with his backpack 
  • “a hostage situation! we haven’t had that in a while!” 
  • “wow ned, so respectful of the situation,” she says as ned pulls up a chair next to him. 
  • “peter already out?” he asks, and she nods. 
  • though she’ll never admit it to them, the real reason she forced ned and peter to let her help was because after the building incident, she couldn’t stand the thought of peter being out there alone. and even if he’d never let her out there with him physically, at least she was doing what she could
  • ned pulls up a map with peter’s suit tracker and puts on a headset. “obi to anakin, you copy?”
  • “why am i anakin? i’m not going down a dark path-” peter’s voice comes through the headset, and michelle breathes out a sigh of relief. 
  • ned ignores him. “you’re getting close. police have the area surrounded, but i can’t get access to a camera inside the building.” 
  • “it looks like a general retail store,” mj says from her headset. ned is giving more details to peter when mj yells, “i got a camera! sending it over now,” and just like that peter is able to see what ned and michelle are seeing
  • “oh shit,” ned mutters. 
  • there’s at least ten masked men and just as mj predicted, eight hostages. the men look heavily armed, and definitely are not amateurs. 
  • “don’t go in peter,” mj warns. “sit this one out.”
  • “are you kidding me? if i don’t do something, those guys will kill everyone!” peter yells back, and according to the tracker, he’s on the roof of the building now. 
  • “you can’t take on ten guys at once by yourself!” mj raises her voice too, and ned slowly backs his chair away. if peter and mj are gonna fight over this, he should probably stay out of it 
  • “whatever. ned, give me a way in.” peter snaps, but mj shoots her hand to ned’s chair before he can scoot back in.
  • “no way,” mj narrows her eyes at the screen. “ned, don’t,”
  • “i’m doing this with or without your help, MJ.” peter’s tracker moves down the side of one of the buildings. 
  • “it’s too dangerous!” 
  • “get me a way in, or the stay the hell out of it!” peter says, and mj yanks her headset off and walks into the bathroom.
  • it’s silent for a moment, before ned thinks it’s safe enough to speak. 
  • “you can get in through the side door,” he says, and peter does. 
  • the fight is going well so far. peter has 3 of the men webbed up and 2 of them ran away in fear. ned is keeping him updated on the other 5 as police rush out the hostages
  • “on your left!” ned shouts, and peter nearly gets shot as he shoots out a web grenade.
  • “taser web!” he yells at two guys coming from the back, and ned hollers. 
  • “in the corner!” and peter webs him up. 
  • suddenly one of the guys comes out from behind the aisle and ned yells to peter, but the guy is faster. 
  • and peter is shot in the chest
  • “pull up his vitals!” mj screams, suddenly back in the chair. her eyes are bloodshot and she’s obviously been crying, but ned doesn’t have time to ask. 
  • “peter?” he calls into the headset. no response. “peter!”
  • “ned, where are his vitals?” mj is scrambling to find the location of the nearest hospital. 
  • “they aren’t good,” ned mutters. 
  • “keep him talking,” mj starts typing in coordinates into the computer. there’s a protocol set up, the “lost baby” protocol (tony’s name, not theirs)
  • basically, if peter gets in a situation, mj can trigger an alert to the avengers facility upstate by typing in coordinates. 
  • “he’s not responding!” ned yells. 
  • “okay,” she takes a deep breath. “okay it’s going to be fine. tony is on his way, it’s fine-”
  • and then the alarm goes off, signaling peter’s heart has stopped. 
  • happy arrives at the apartment twenty minutes later to drive the two of them to the hospital, and they pick may up from work on the way
  • luckily, he was in the area at the time
  • ned has his laptop, replaying the footage of the fight over and over again, doing his best to use karen’s facial recognition to identify these guys
  • and may is on the phone with pepper in the passenger seat, crying because thank god he’s alive but also scared because the bullet made his suit malfunction, which is why the alarm said his heart stopped
  • luckily, it never did
  • mj is leaning her head on the window, her headphones in, and all she can think about was how none of this would’ve happened if two people were watching the camera
  • tony and sam got to peter in less than 2 minutes and flew peter to a quinjet a few miles from the city where bruce was waiting with a stretcher, an iv, and everything needed to keep peter stable
  • by the time may, mj, and ned had reached the avengers facility, peter was already in surgery
  • “holy…” ned mutters, taking in the surroundings of the facility but may is walking quickly to pepper and maria hill who take the 3 of them down a long hallway. 
  • the wait feels like months. may has disappeared to talk with tony and ned is off giving the footage of the fight to maria and natasha, and mj is by herself in the hallway
  • she texted her parents to say she was sleeping over at betty’s, but that’s it. 
  • “michelle?” she looks up to see steve rogers standing over her. 
  • “uh…yeah?” she scoots over on the bench, and steve sits. 
  • “i’m Steve, peter has told us a lot about you.”
  • “oh god,” she shakes her head, laughing slightly. Her face turns serious, “how is he?”
  • steve pauses, “from what Bruce said, he’s going to be fine. the bullet didn’t hit anything major, but it was tricky to get it out. he’s sleeping right now, may and ned were heading to sit with him.”
  • mj nods, fiddling with her sweater. she’s not one to cry in public, and she’s not one to express her emotions either. even with peter, she still teases him and calls him a loser and rolls her eyes at him, but he knows she means well. 
  • “he really cares about you,” steve says softly. 
  • “we…we got in a fight,” she lowers her head. right before he went in the store, and I left the computers because I couldn’t take it. he was on my last nerves and I left and then he got shot because I wasn’t watching the screens and-” 
  • “it’s not your fault,” steve says reassuringly. “tony showed us the footage, there was no way you or ned or peter could’ve seen that guy coming.” 
  • michelle just shrugs, and steve sits with her until may comes out. 
  • “he wants to see you,” she smiles, holding out her hand. 
  • she looks over at steve, who gestures as if to say ‘go on’, and she reaches up and takes may’s hand. 
  • peter’s room is small with bare white walls and a tv in the corner playing an episode of the clone wars. mj walks in and may tells ned to come with her to get food, and that’s when she finally lets herself look at peter.
  • the dork is smiling. actually smiling after all of this and mj wants to yell at him, but instead she settles for going on the side where peter isn’t hurt and sits on his bed and puts her head on his chest
  • “hey darling,” peter says and michelle looks up at him. “thought i’d try a nickname out, thoughts?” he smiles, and mj puts her head back on his chest
  • “i’ll take the lack of response as a yes.”
  • “this is my fault.” 
  • “what?” peter says and she stands up, wiping the tears from her eyes and she starts pacing frantically. “what are you talking about?”
  • “this,” she gestures to the heart monitor. “is because of me. because i bailed because i got mad at you and i wasn’t watching the screen-”
  • “babe,” peter cuts her off. “this is because i didn’t listen to you. tony told me how fast you got those coordinates out to him, you did it in under 10 seconds.” 
  • “i was stressed,” she narrows her eyes. 
  • “you saved me.”
  • “it said your heart stopped.”
  • “but it didn’t”
  • “but it said-”
  • “it didn’t.”
  •  “but-”
  • “please don’t blame yourself. i know you’re doing it because you’re scared, but i promise you i’m okay. i made you that promise didn’t i?”
  • “that stupid promise,” she mutters, taking peter’s hand and letting him pull her back to lay on his chest, away from the bullet of course
  • “i was so…scared,” she whispers. 
  • “me too,” he whispers back.
  • and that’s how ned and may find them, michelle asleep on his chest, and peter’s good arm wrapped around her, his face nuzzled in her hair. 

How cool are plants? My mornings usually look a little like this, chocolate + oat + banana smoothie bowl (going hard on the oats) and lots of pretty fruit, rawnola and peanut butter cookie dough to top. I have a big sweet tooth so I love these kind of breakfasts. 

Last week I set myself a health challenge, to stick to eating only wholefoods and things made by me for seven days. I had lots of homemade snacks in the freezer to munch on in between meals and had my smoothies for breakfast, carbs like rice and potatoes with lots of veggies and greens for lunch and dinner, and my homemade snacks for in the middle. Eight days later and I survived, didn’t even eat one Clif bar either. Not that I have an issue with any store bought food/snacks, but I wanted to challenge myself and my food and it also meant less package products and less waste. I love having homemade food to snack on (like brownies, oat bars and muffins) because I make them to my liking and know exactly what`s inside them, plus I store them in the freezer so they last forever. 

Recently I`ve been trying to be more conscious of what I`m eating, why I`m eating it, and keeping up my exercise regime and I`m feeling really good with my body these days. The mornings are getting colder now (9 degrees Celsius this morning) and I can see the warmth of my breath against the chilly air outside when I go out for my run, but every time I get back home I feel great, and so that feeling keeps me motivated every day to keep doing it.

anonymous asked:

This is a very serious question. Are your glasses really the round kind? I demand proof.

they actually are!!

not only are they round, theyre also huge and thick as shit bc Im blind as a bat. I brought these with one of my friend; he actually chose these one with rly cool grooves for me since he has a similar pair but plain.

I hope it shows somewhat on the picture lmao the damn phone wont focus properly

The Zipper Of Good Fortune

“What do you mean we have to close up shop? We’ve never even worked a night-shift before, this is the first time!” Jungkook said to his manager, who was very done with Jungkook’s shit at the moment.

“Can you just stop complaining? You either work the night shift, or you go. Why cant you be like Jimin and just do as I say?” The manager looks at Jimin who was currently standing to next to Jungkook.

“Woah woah woah WOAH, leave me out of this” Jimin says to the manager.

“Get to work, both of you. Theres no one else working tonight because of Valentines Day, they all have dates and you two are the only ones here who are lonely and single, so don’t even try me. Now if you excuse me, I have a date with my boyfriend Namjoon.”

“Have fun Jin hyung” said Jimin with a cheerful smile. That beautiful smile thats so welcoming to others. Jungkook sees his hyung’s smile, and even though he’s in a bad mood he decides to smile anyways.

“Yea, bye” Jungkook said rolling his eyes. The younger of the two goes towards a tie rack and started to organize the ties that have been thrown all over the place from the long day in the store. Jungkook has always wanted to work in a fancy store for some reason, he felt that it would suit his personality. He looked at a black tie with pink stripes, and it reminded him of the first day he ever came to work. He walked in, and the first person he saw was a young man with pink hair, wearing a black Burberry tux, and he had a pink tie on. He found it the most weirdest thing, seeing a man with pink hair. But damn was he cute. Fetus Jungkook was very nervous of his first day at work at his dream job, so he went up to the man seeking guidance.

“u-um hello, i-im Jeon Jungkook, your new co-worker” he hesitantly bowed at a 90 degree angle and looked at the pink haired man.

“Theres no need to be so formal, my name is Jimin, nice to meet you Jungkook” He smiled and bowed. His smile. His smile omg. Jungkook’s heart started to race at how beautiful Jimin’s smile was, and how angelic his voice sounded. Jimin looked like he was glowing inside the already bright store.

“Is that what you came to work in?” Jimin said, pointing to the younger who was wearing a white shirt and ripped jeans with tims.

“Y-yea”

“Well then, lets go get a tux for you!” Jimin smiled and grabbed Jungkook’s hand, dragging him towards the fitting rooms.

Jungkook smiles at the sudden memory that popped up in his head, his hyung has always been sweet and patient with him. Jimin was the friend Jungkook could go to when he needed to rant, or when he needed advice with something.

“When he says that we have to close up, does that also mean we have to do the cleaning to?” Jungkook said while hanging up the ties on the stand.

“Yea, I guess so, we are the only ones here.” Jungkook looked around the store and noticed that him and Jimin where actually the only ones there. Suddenly, an idea popped into his head.

“oMG”

“What?”

“I have an idea”

“…What is it?”

“Its very stupid”

“Your very stupid”

“Oh shut up” Jungkook grabbed Jimin’s hand and they went to the backroom

“Jungkook, what the hel-”

“Shhhhhh, just wait” Jungkook walked further into the room and let go of Jimin’s hand unwillingly. His hands are just so soft and small, they are literally perfect to hold. He grabs a tux from the box that had just been shipped in today.

“Jimin. I HAVE to try this on”

“Jungkook you are an idiot”

“Yes. I am aware”

“Pass me the other one”

The younger smirked and reached into the box getting a tux that was Jimins size, and hands it over to him. They both left the dim backroom and went into the fitting rooms to try on the very, very expensive tux’s.

Jimin gets dressed faster then the younger and exits the fitting room and looks in a mirror. The silver button down shirt thats tucked into his slacks make his butt pop out, and it compliments his hips very nicely.

“Kookie can you see how this looks?”

“Yea sure hold on, i’m having a little bit of trouble with the zipper, it wont go up” he says struggling with the zipper.

“Do you need help?”

“W-what?” The younger started blushing at the thought of Jimin being so close to his dick…

“Do you need help?” Jimin said in a more powerful voice.

“NO I-im good”

After another minute or so struggling with the zipper, he finally gets it up.

“I GOT IT! HELL YEA” Jungkook exits the fitting room to a beautiful human being right in front of him. Oh wait he’s looking at a mirror. But then he looks to the side, OMG HES GORGEOUS!!!! Woop thats another mirror. He looks to the other side to see his hyung on his phone. Jungkook’s mouth drops at the side in front of him. Now, he’s just staring at Jimin without saying a word. The elder finally catches on and says-

“WOW Jungkook you look AMAZING” A little bit of blush creeps on his face noticing how sharp Jungkook looks. Sure, they were tux everyday, but the younger looks like he just came out of Prince Charming’s ball. His facial features suddenly look a lot sharper too, and its making the older feel some type of way.

“J-jimin you l-look really nice t-too” Jungkook stutters because the beauty in front of him is just so overwhelming.

“Can we take a picture together? I told my friend Yoongi that i’m going on a date with you tonight, and as you know, i’m not” Jimin laughs nervously as he scratches his head, hoping that Jungkook would be okay with what he suggested, and hoping he wouldn’t question why he decided to tell his friend that they went on a date.

“Yea sure, why not” Well, that went better then Jimin expected. He couldn’t help but notice the blush both of them had on in the selca. *Damn we look good together..*

“Damn we look good, can you send me that?” Jungkook said smiling with his cute bunny smile.

“Sure” Jimin sent the picture to his friend Yoongi and to Jungkook. The younger took out his phone when it rang, and Jimin looked at the notification. It was a text under the contact name of-

“Big Booty Jimin? PFFFFT”

“DONT LAUGH I SAW THAT YOU HAD ME UNDER ‘NICE THIGHS JEON”

“YOU DID N O T SEE THAT”

“YES. YES I DID”  

“But seriously Jimin, damn that ass!”

“Bro your thighs look like they were sculpted by gods”

“Why, thank you” Great, now Jungkook was thinking about his Hyung’s ass. But its just so peachy and-

“Imma go get out of this tux, i’m scared i might rip it or something, we don’t want that happening”

“Yea we really don’t need that happening” They both went into the fitting rooms and started to get undressed. As Jungkook took off his shirt he couldn’t help but think about how Jimin told his friend that he went on a date with Jungkook. When Yoongi brought up a boyfriend, was the younger the first person Jimin thought of? The elder wouldn’t mind going out with him? The sudden though got him blushing and his cheeks felt hot. He went to take of his pants when he notices the zipper wouldn’t budge.

“Fuck” He kept trying with all his force to pull down the zipper but it just wasnt budging.

“Shit, shit shit” He started panicking, what the hell was gonna happen if he didnt get these pants off? He’s currently shirtless, stuck in pants that are part of a very expensive tux suit, he’s getting sweaty, and he’s at WORK. What a Valentines Day.

“Um, Jungkook are you okay?”

“No. Not really. Not at all”

“What happened?” Jungkook swung open the door and saw a startled Jimin outside of the fitting room stall. Jimin was currently looking at a sexy beast. He younger was shirtless, his nice abs exposed, and there was sweat dripping down his forehead and a little on his collarbone. He pointed to the zipper and said,

“This is the problem”

“W-W-what?”

“OMG sorry i was pointing to my dick i meant the zipper”

“You scared me”

“I dont know what to do its stuck”

“Wait let me try” Jimin approaches Jungkook who’s currently in the fitting room fidgeting. The elder kneels down and his head is right above the younger’s dick and he suddenly feels awkward. He starts to blush and clears his throat. Jungkook is blushing hard as well, he’s basically a tomato at this point. The younger looks up at the ceiling and tries not to think too much of it.

“Well, uhm, im just gonna go for it” Jimin suddenly put his hand on the zipper and tries to pull it down. He tries again but this time his hand accidentally brushes a little too hard against the younger’s dick and Jungkook groans but when he realized what just happened he jumps back in shock.

“IM SORRY OMG” They are now both feriously blushing, and jimin can no longer look jungkook in the eye.

“JUST, JUST HURRY, i cant take them off by myself”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes just go ahead”

“O-okay” Jimin tried his best to not touch Jungkook’s dick, however, that didn’t turn out so well. Not just that, but the younger cant help but to look down and imagine Jimin’s pretty plump lips around his dick, sucking away. He bites his lip at the thought, he’s got to get these dirty thoughts to go away, he’s already getting a boner and he doesn’t need to make it worse. The elder is trying his best to not touch Jungkook again but when he does, the younger moans, and honestly, Jimin wants to hear him moan even more. He wants to hear the younger moan his name while he’s grinding on him and-

“mhmmm” Jungkook, just, he, MOANED? Jimin’s dirty thoughts distracted him and he accidentally let go of the zipper with force, and he put pressure on the younger’s dick. An idea popped into Jimin;s head. It really isn’t his fault, all those dirty thoughts. Jungkook got him all hot a flustered, being shirtless, moaning in all his glory. Jimin suddenly smirked and groped the younger, adding pressure and feeling the younger’s dick in his hand. Jungkook moaned, and took a step back in surprise, and shock.

“J-Jimin?” Jungkook looked into Jimin’s eyes and saw something he’s never seen before. His pupils have gone large, and he has a smirk on his plump lips. He’s no longer the cute angelic Jimin he first met, now he looks intimidating and sexy as hell. Jimin gropes the younger’s hardening dick again and the he groans at the friction. He feels to sensitive under his hyung’s intimidating touch, and he wants a lot more.

“J-jimin, do-do it again” Jimin’s smirk becomes even wider when he hears those words, he does the same action again however adding more pressure. The younger cant take it anymore, he starts grinding his hips against Jimin’s hand and lets out a lewd groan. The pink haired man looks up at Jungkook in shock, but he is just even more turned on now. He stands up and grabs the back of Jungkook’s neck and kisses him passionately. He starts grinding on him and the friction of their dicks rubbing against one another makes him go insane. He loves the way Jungkook’s body feels against his own, and he loved how the younger blushes innocently under his touch.

“Fuck Jungkook, you are so incredibly hot” He says while kissing the raven haired boy. The younger moans and grinds against the elders dick. All those fantasies he’s had in his head are now becoming reality. He lets his hands travel against the others chest, feeling every crease and playing close attention to his abs. He never knew Jungkook had an amazing body like this, just seeing the other shirtless is getting him turned on and making him lustful. Jungkook reaches down and grabs Jimin’s dick and adds the right amount of pressure to make Jimin groan and thrust his hips forward. Jimin pushes Jungkook against the wall and bites his shoulder,  he sucks and nibbles some more to leaving a love mark to claim him. Jungkook throws his head back in pleasure. He couldn’t believe that this was happening either, he’s currently having a heated make-out session with his hot co-worker. The older starts sucking and leaves love bites all over the younger’s collarbones .

“These pants are a problem, they’ve got to go” The older says in a husky voice that sends a shiver down the others spine. That husky voice made the younger lose his shyness. He was ready to fuck Jimin until he couldn’t walk.

“I’ve got an idea. Sit down” Jungkook sits down on the chair in the fitting room, following the others directions. Jimin straddles him, and starts riding the younger. The younger’s head falls back in pleasure and he lets out a moan. He grabs Jimin’s hips and starts adding more pressure to add more friction on their aching dicks.

“I cant take it anymore. Fuck it ” Jungkook reaches for the zipper and pulls it down with all the force he has. Jimin looks at the younger in shock,

“You-you broke it! Damn you want me to suck you off that badly, huh?”

“Its better broken then me cumming all over the pants, now isn’t it? Now suck my dick” He stands up and swiftly takes off the pants, leaving him in only underwear.

“My turn” Jungkook says with a grin. He slides off Jimin’s shirt and immediately attacks the new smooth skin. He nibbles on the older’s earlobe and gets a slight moan as a reward. He thrusts his hips onto Jimin’s, earning a very lewd moan from the elder. Jimin pulls the younger away from his body, eying him up and down. Jimin gives the younger a smirk, and he starts kissing and nibbling at the younger’s chest, soon lowering to his abdomen, leaving love bites. He swiftly takes off the others underwear, freeing Jungkook’s hard dick from the article of clothing. *Fuck hes big*. The elder continues what he was doing, leaving a trail of sloppy kisses as he gets closer and closer to the younger’s dick, the younger waiting in anticipation. Jimin kisses and sucks everywhere besides where the younger wants him to kiss and suck making the younger get needy.

“Stop teasing me”

“But your thighs are just too beautiful” Jungkook grabs a handful of Jimin’s hair and forces him to face the younger’s dick.

“Im about to fuck your mouth so I suggest your open those pretty plump lips of yours” Jimin obediently opens his mouth, accepting the switch of things and lets Jungkook force his dick inside his mouth. The younger moans at the feeling of him being swallowed, he loves the feeling of the older’s warm mouth around him, sucking away. Jungkook grabs the pink hair tighter and thrusts his hips into Jimin’s mouth, throwing his head back at the amazing feeling. Tears start forming on the elders eyes when Jungkook’s thrusts become harsh, and the hair pulling is intense, however he loves being mouth fucked.

“Mmm you dirty slut, you love the taste of my dick don’t you?” Jungkook says in a low breathy moan. Jimin hums in response causing a vibration that makes the younger whimper. Jungkook starts wildly thrusting into jimin’s mouth, pulling the older’s hair so he can swallow more of him. The younger throws his head back in pleasure when he feels he’s about to cum. Jimin however, grabs the younger’s hips firmly stopping the younger’s intense hip thrusting. He removes his lips from the younger’s painfully hard dick, making the younger moan in disappointment.

“J-jimin what the fuck?”

“I cant have you cum just yet, i want your dick inside of me” Jungkook’s eyes widened in shock and Jimin was honestly a little surprised with his own words, however he was just too horny to even give a shit. All he knew at the moment was that he wanted the younger’s dick inside of him. The truth is, neither of them has ever done it with a guy. This is the first time Jungkook has ever fucked a guy, and this is the first time Jimin has ever had a dick inside of him.

“What” The youngers eyes widened in shock.

“Fuck me” The younger’s shock just changed into pure lust when he saw the way Jimin looked into his eyes and how low his voice sounded. The younger groaned and pushed Jimin against the wall again biting at his neck. The elder moved his head to the side offering the younger more space to bite and suck. Jimin moaned at the feeling of the younger’s body surrounding his own. Jungkook went up and bit his hyungs earlobe, earning a satisfied groan. He felt two hands rub his sides and then they grabbed his ass earning a yelp.

“Fuck your ass is so peachy, we need to get those pants off” Jungkook smirked and unbuttoned the elders jeans, lowering them, allowing Jimin to slide them off. The younger gave Jimin one last kiss, tongues fighting for dominance as Jungkook rubs his hand against Jimin’s hard-on. He younger breaks the kiss and brings his fingers up to Jimin’s pretty plump lips.

“Suck” The older gladly accepts the younger’s demand and puts the fingers in his mouth. He sucks, his tongue swirling around the fingers and the younger swears he could cum by just looking at the sight. He brings his other hand down to Jimin’s hard dick and rubs through the clothing.

“Mmm baby your so hard for me” Jimin thrusts his dick into the younger’s hands wanting more friction. Jungkook watches as Jimin sucks desperately on his fingers wishing that it was his dick again. Jimin lets the younger slip his fingers outside of his mouth, and pulls him into a kiss. Jungkook uses his free hand to rub Jimin’s hard on through the fabric again and the elder moans against Jungkook’s mouth. He pulls away from the kiss and thrusts his hips onto Jungkooks hands again, letting him get the friction that he desperately wants.

“Fuck just, FUCK ME ALREADY” Jimin slides off his underwear in a blink of an eye and basically tackled Jungkook. He pins the younger against the wall, kissing his swollen cherry lips. Jungkook takes his lubricated finger and gets closer to Jimin’s pink hole, while sucking on those heavenly lips. As Jungkook’s hand brushes against the older’s hole, the older lets out a little squeak. He’s never felt a finger so close to his hole before and its a new feeling. He suddenly regrets what he said and he breaks the kiss, and bites his lip. Jungkook looks into the younger’s eyes, he could see a little bit of fright.

“Are you sure you want me to do this”

“Y-yes, but how painful will it be?

"Just a finger or my cock” Jimin blushes hard at these words,

“J-just a finger”

“You’ve never fingered yourself before?”

“YOU HaVe?”

“Of course!” Jungkook takes this opportunity while Jimin is distracted and put his two fingers through the muscle.

“AH, it burns!” Jimin yells out squinting his eyes. He has to admit, he really doesn’t like this feeling, but the younger’s hand slowly rapping around his cock is making up for it. Jungkook slides his finger in, and kisses Jimin trying to distract him from the pain.

“Babe, are you sure you are okay with this” Jungkook looked at Jimin’s watery eyes and saw pain. Jimin was about to answer no when-

“OH, fuck me!” Jimin’s eyes closed shut as he gasped for air. Jungkook found the older’s prostate and grinned, knowing that if he had waited any longer to find it he wouldn’t have been able to fuck Jimin.

“W-what was that!?” Jungkook rubbed against his prostate again and Jimin threw his head back welcoming the wonderful knew feeling. He closed his eyes so tight that he could see white when he opened them again. The younger added a knew finger and the elder whimpered in pain as the new finger was pushed into the tight muscle. But then again, the younger brushed against the bundle of nerves causing Jimin to arch his back and push his ass against Jungkook’s finger.

“FUCK! DO IT AGAIN” Jungkook thrusts his fingers into the elder at a fast pace, basically finger fucking the elder, each time aiming and hitting the elders prostate. Jimin couldn’t help but let his tongue fall out as he panted and threw his hips back everytime the younger’s fingers entered him. Jungkook’s pace got faster and faster until he noticed Jimin’s breathing and how his hole clenched against his fingers. The younger suddenly pulled out, getting a groan from the elder. He didn’t want him to cum just yet, and he felt that the elder was prepped enough for his dick. Jungkook turned around so now his hyung was against the wall and the younger was hovering over him.

“Jump” The elder jumped and the younger caught him, bringing his legs around his hips. Jungkook’s dick teased the elders whole, gaining a shiver from him.

“This may hurt a bit..” Jungkook entered Jimin’s entrance, stretching out the tense muscles slowly. Tears started forming on the elders eyes, he knew it would hurt, but this burns and it feels like something is ripping him open.

“Ah-hh, it-t hurts” Jungkook leans in and kisses the elder, trying to distract him from the pain.

“Its gonna be okay, I promise it’ll feel good in a little bit” He leans in for another kiss as he pushes deeper into the elder. They stay in that position for a little bit, Jungkook not wanting to cause Jimin more pain.

“You… You can go now” Jimin bites his lip as he sees Jungkook thrust into him from the dressing room mirror. He looks at the younger’s perfect body figure, the way he muscles flex, his nice broad back. He lets his eyes fall as Jungkook thrusts into him again. He didn’t think it would be so painful but it honestly feels like something is tearing him apart. He opens his mouth to let out a pained groan when Jungkook captures his lips in a deep kiss. Their tongues intertwine as they fight for dominance, the younger quickly winning as Jimin melts into the kiss. Jungkook’s thrusting is slowly speeding up, he just cant control it anymore. He’s secretly wanted to fuck his hyung and make him moan his name from the first day he met him.

“J-jimin your so tight” The younger says as he thrusts even harder into the elder.

“F-fuck” The elder is starting to get used to the thrusting and the pain is being replaced by pleasure. The elder starts moving his hips in sync with Jungkook’s thrusts, he felt like something was missing and he wanted to find it. The way his hole felt around Jungkook’s dick felt overwhelming to the younger. This is better than any girl he ever did. The younger moaned when Jimin started sucking on his neck, leaving another love bite. The elder started nibbling on the younger’s ear piercing which was one of his sensitive spots.

“J-jimin” the younger moaned. He thrusts really hard at an angle and Jimin swears he could see a white light-

“DADDY! F U C K ME” Well he found what he was looking for.

“What did you just call me?” The younger says with a wide smirk.

“N-nothing”

“Say it again”

“No”

“Fine ill just have to make you say it” The younger thrusts into the elder at the same angle making Jimin see stars.

“F-FUCK” Jungkook thrusts again, he’s quickening his pace but the elder wants more

“J-jungkook, h-harder!” The younger throws his hips against Jimin’s and the elder is hanging on to the younger’s shoulders for dear life. However, he knew Jungkook was holding back and he wanted more, he didn’t care what he has to do, he wants to be fucked harder

“Daddy harder!” The younger groans at the name, making him even more turned on. He thrusts harder and the elder is losing his grip on the younger’s shoulders. Jungkook is now thrusting in full pace with all his might, and Jimin could feel the ball of heat build up in his stomach. His prostate is being abused and he doesn’t know how much more he can take.

“F-uck i-im go-ing to c-cum” Jimin breathes out in moans.

“Hmm me too” Jimin’s entrance started to squeeze around the younger’s dick, making Jungkook moan at the tight feeling. Its just urging him to go more. He removes his dick from Jimins entrance, and slams back in with full force hitting the elders prostate completely.

“D-daddy!” Jimin pants out. He swears that he saw the gates of heaven for a good few seconds as he cums all over his and the younger’s stomach. He’s panting non-stop, and he feels amazing. The younger thrusts again into Jimin, going for his own release. He cums inside of the elder after a few more thrusts, moaning at how good it felt to finally release. They stay in that position for a little bit, trying to get their breathes back. He sits down on the chair and puts Jimin to sit on his lap.

“That was amazing”

“Yea i know but you couldve at least taken me on a date first”

“UM excuse me, you were the one who kept touching my dick! Its not my fault that you just looked so incredible during everything” Jimin laughed at the younger’s words.

“What are we gonna do about the pants?” Jimin says

“Oh shit I forgot about it. And that we are still at work!”

“Crap we have to close up!” Jimin suddenly gets up reaching for his clothes but then-

“OH FUCK” He falls back on Jungkooks lap as he feels a sudden pain on his lower back.

“My back hurts so much” Jungkook smiles and shrugs. He pulls the elder in for a kiss. It was deep and passionate and they both are enjoying it. Jungkook is the first to pull away as he says,

“Ill get us our clothes” He stands up and rests Jimin on the chair. He reaches for his clothing and once he has his underwear on, he gives Jimin his underwear and the rest of his clothing. They both struggle to get dressed, especially the elder who cant even stand.

“I have an idea about the pants” the younger said as he put on his shoes.

“What is it?”

“Why don’t we just put the pants back exactly how we found it, and then pretend like we don’t know anything if they ask us why the zipper is fucked? They don’t have to ever find out.” The younger grinned at Jimin, thinking this is an amazing plan.

“We are so getting fired”

“I know, but lets just try to stay until our next paycheck” They both smiled and started to close up shop. It was mostly Jungkook doing the work because the elder was having difficulty standing. They shut off all the lights and Jungkook helped Jimin walk outside. The younger locked the door and looked at the pink haired man.

“So, i was thinking, how about we go on a date? I mean if thats, if its okay with you, im not gonna force to do anything…” the younger babbles. He started to blush and looked at the floor smiling awkwardly.

“You know, for a guy I just called daddy, that was not smooth at all” They both started laughing and Jimin looked at the younger with kindness in his eyes.

“Yes i’ll go on a date with you” He pulled Jungkook closer from the collar on his shirt and they shared a deep, romantic kiss.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

This is my first fan fiction and first smut, so I hope you guys like it! And also can we talk about how awesome BTS’s comeback is like damn. Chong! Jojun! Balsa! 

~Admin Blue :)

Caprice [Jungkook]

{{ noun // a sudden change, as of one’s mind or the weather ; a tendency to change one’s mind }}

Is he or is he not your boyfriend?

Fluff. College AU. 3,404 words.

➵ Joie De Vivre Series: a holiday collab with @dreamscript and @zephyoongist

Seokjin / Yoongi + Hoseok / Namjoon / Jimin / Taehyung / Jungkook

❁❁❁❁❁❁❁

Chemistry is going to be your cause of demise.

It’s inevitable. You have a seventy-nine percent in the class, and the professor just announced that the class’s average score on the second midterm was a measly forty-five percent. You had been hoping that she’d curve the midterm, so your grade might reach a more stable percentage, but she refused on account of some overachiever earning a one hundred percent on the midterm. The look in everyone’s eyes when she said that— whoever received the perfect score better sleep with one eye open. College students, yourself included, are pretty volatile over grades.

Did you mention that the only four components making up your overall class grade were a compilation of quiz scores, two midterms, and the final?

So yeah, you’re screwed.

In more ways than one, actually, if you have to admit.

A certain cute boy named Jeon Jungkook sitting in front of you is awfully distracting.

You might be paying more attention to him than the lecture at times.

Huh.

Maybe that’s why your lowest grade is in this class.

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Jay Park - Dead End

Originally posted by korean-hip-hop

More than a week had passed, since you had last spoken to Jay. This was the first fight that lasted for so long. You both weren’t very hot tempered nor would you hold grudges against the other, so the two of you would easily sort out your problems. You were able to talk about your disagreement in a calm and collected manner, without having to raise your voices to make a point. It had never gotten out of control to this extent, that you both completely ignored each other for days. It was also the very first time that Jay had hung up on you on the phone. And the first time he left the country to go on tour without saying goodbye, or at least sending a text message to inform you he would be leaving.

And even when he returned to Seoul, he didn’t say a word. You wouldn’t have even known that he was back, if it wasn’t for the snapchat updates of your mutual friends.
You weren’t even sure where you two left off. Were you still a couple or had you broken up? He left in a state of uncertainty and it was killing you slowly not knowing where you stood.

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I have a sweet tooth like no other. I want to live inside the candy store in Hogsmeade, even though I know I would overdose on sugar. I want to bathe in butterbeer and gorge myself on Bertie Botts, Chocolate Frogs, and every other candy in there like I’m the fat kid from Willy Wonka. The couple who runs the place would wake up in the morning to find me, all round and tumbly, groaning in pleasure in their now empty shop. I am envious of all the awesome candy in the Harry Potter universe!

Sweeter than cherry.

You went to scavenging with some Saviors and Negan. Old stores inside a big gallery were like a shopping, but smaller. You went checking places to try to find something interesting. You find an old hairdresser store. “That was probably ones of the fancy one,” You thought.

“I’m going inside,” You said to the saviors and to Negan.

“Be careful doll! Don’t lose your brain for a fucker because you want some hairspray.” Negan says with his grin face.

You hit the front three times and wait a time to see if had any walker. After 2 minutes it came 3 walkers, 2 walkers whose seems being women before, they still have some things in their hair. You quickly manage to kill three of them. You enter the place checking to make sure. You look outside and see Negan smashing a walker with Lucille. And the other men around getting whatever they want, and breaking the rest in middle time. You roll your eyes seeing them being so childish.

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