like i can not function

8

How to get the girl: Stare at her until she marries you - A Guide by Lena Luthor

i hate when ppl say shit like BUT ANTIDEPRESSANTS ALTER YOUR BRAIN FUNCTION UNNATURALLY READ UP ON IT NURGGHH like yeah, youre right, they force it to hold on to serotonin so i can function, similar to how i take thyroxine bc my thyroid doesnt fucking make the right shit, similar to how people with diabetes take insulin, similar to how people with low iron take iron supplements, you thin slice of nutloaf

do you yell at people for eating food bc their body doesnt just naturally photosynthesize energy on its own

I don’t know how to say it but I have these thoughts in my head and they’re messy and loud and they don’t make any sense but they’re there. And they’re all about you. Every second of every day, it’s you. It’s like I can’t function without having you there. I can’t think, I can’t breathe, I can’t speak without you being there, like even the thought of you keeps me safe. I know it sounds crazy but you’re a part of me and I don’t think I can ever get you out. I don’t think I want to.

i have to say, the scene in please like me where josh has walled tom off in his room for eating the truffle oil mac & cheese and he tells tom he can have some pizza but only under the condition that when tom orders, he asks for extra jalapenos and insipidly pronounces the “j”

and so tom reluctantly does it and josh and claire just die of laughter

was like the most realistic depiction of friendship i have ever seen on tv

just, like, laughing so hysterically you can barely function over something that is objectively so stupid

that was very real

2

I haven’t seen any Parsley fanart
That’s unacceptable

THIS WAS VERY… Experimental? There’s a few things I’m not happy with but overall I’m trying to improve my poses and effects…. Y’know. So that they’re not always stuck at the same ¾ angle. So please excuse any mistakes, I’m just…. learning, I guess!

I’ve included a version WITH the Lucidia on it, and without- Cause I couldn’t decide which I liked more.

hands are hard

[Parsley belongs to @loverofpiggies!]

3

I can’t believe I forgot to share the greatest christmas Hogswatch gift ever

My friends made me custom Discworld teas! They are ridiculously delicious and have the greatest names. (Also those labels are hand-lettered!) There’s significantly less of the Small Gods blend because I’ve had the flu all week and it’s particularly soothing, and also I figure there’s got to be a small god of viruses out there that can do me a favor.

The Girl Is a Spy {Hux x Reader}

Request:  Hux finds out his lover fem!reader is a spy for the Resistance

A/N: This is longer then I intended and I’m a bit on the fence about the result, but Enjoy!


You sat at Hux’s desk. His data pad glowing faintly with information on display. Nothing new here. You closed that file and moved to the next. So far you had collected a pretty decent amount of information about a current project labeled Starkiller. The general should be proud with how much info you’d be sending back to them.  As soon as you finished looking over this file you’d be ready to broadcast what you’d found to the resistance. As you suspected nothing interesting was in the file. You closed that one too and shut the pad down completely and placed it back in Hux’s desk. You pulled out your comlink and flipped it on. Strange. You felt surprisingly unsettled. Before doing things like this you got a little nervous but this felt different, more daunting and dangerous. It felt as if the room itself was watching you, waiting for you to start speaking to the resistance so it could expose your secret.

‘a spy’ the walls seemed to whisper ‘the girl is a spy.’

You shook it off. “You’re fine.” you said to yourself “You’ve done this a million times. You’re fine.”

You ran over what you were going to say in your head. There was no room for mistakes when relaying such sensitive information. A few deep breaths later and you were ready to go. You clicked the button down on the comlink and started talking. The problem with a lot of information is you have to talk more. Half way through your report and you wanted to tell them to hold on and give you a minuet but you pressed on. You took a moment to catch your breath at the end before asking for confirmation that they heard what you’d said.

The line was silent. It took a couple minuets for transmissions to reach the other person, especially from this far away. You leaned back in the chair relaxing a little as you waited. But relaxation was cut short. The door to the office hissed open to reveal General Hux himself. You leapt from the chair your stomach plummeting to the floor in the process. judging from the look he gave you Hux was just as surprised to see you.

“What are you doing in here?” he asked his tone was normal signaling he didn’t suspect anything.

“I was-” you trailed off noticing the comlink still sitting on the desk “I was looking for you. I-” you moved around the desk and swiped up the comlink, careful not to draw too much attention. “I just missed you I guess.” It was only a half lie. He had been working a lot lately. You really did miss him.

“Oh, well I was about to return to our quarters. I only needed to finish one last thing.”

He bought it. Releasing the breath you’d been holding, Your body relaxed a little. You moved to get around him and to the door. “In that case I’ll-”

“What is that?” He asked cutting you off half way to the door.

Your moment of relief was gone. It would do you no good to completely lie. “Its a comlink I found in the halls. Figured it might belong to a trooper or a lieutenant, so I was going to drop it by the command center.”

“You’re probably right.” He said sitting down behind his desk.

“Yeah. probably. So I’ll get going now!” You tried to excuse yourself and it would have worked.

As you went to press the button on the door the comlink went off. “Agent Y/N, report received. Please continue research on project Starkiller.”

Your eyes closed. There was no way he hadn’t heard that. You could feel the walls laughing at you now. ‘caught you! He caught you!’  You turned slowly glanging at him. His eyes were locked on you but his expression was blank. Maybe he hadn’t heard.

“Agent.” He said. The word was clipped short. He only spoke like that to you when he was angry.

“I- Its not. This isn’t-” you tried to think of something, anything to say to save yourself but you couldnt. There was no way to cover this.

“Agent! Is that not what it said?!” He was yelling now. standing from his chair and stepping towards you.

“I-”

“Is it not!” He wouldn’t even allow you the chance to talk around this.

“Yes.”

He straitened his posture and looked down at you through narrowed eyes. “It’s all a lie then.” He said. It wasn’t a question.

You didn’t say anything. What could you say? ‘Yes, I was lying about who I am and where I came from this whole time while I used your references to access top secret information!’ You couldn’t say that because he already knew. He’s a smart man.

“And your feelings for me. This relationship.” He spit the work like venom “That was all a lie too.”

“No!” This you couldn’t go silent on. “No,  Everything we have together, everything I told you about my feelings for you is true. I care for you I really do. I- I love you.” You hardly said that to each other. You reserved it for the most intimate of moments but this was an exception. He needed to know.

“I don’t believe you.”

Your heart stopped. He didn’t believe you. The only true thing you had ever told him and he didn’t believe you. Pain pierced your heart. Is this what heartbreak feels like? “I do. I do!” they were the only words you could utter. Your mind raced a mile a minuet trying to think of anything to say in this moment but it was blank. He doesn’t believe you.

Hux stepped to the side of you barely giving you a downward glance. “Get out of my way.”

Your mouth opened and closed trying to protest his leaving but you fell silent as you stepped out of the door frame. He left just like that. Leaving you stunned and hurt. In all honesty his reaction was rather good compared to what you imagined it be. There was a lot less screaming and the conversation was short, But this one felt worse. You could feel the hot tears brimming in your eyes. Your world had finally come crashing down on you and this was the result. You had to leave. You had to leave now before he returned with troopers to arrest you.

tadhdfw your friends think they know when you’re on your meds and when you aren’t (even though they’re wrong a lot of the time). And they wonder why you’re not taking them when you go out for the day with them. Like I can function without them, I choose to take them when I have stuff to do; I don’t need them to eat food with you - if I did I wouldn’t even be eating because they reduce my appetite and make me sick thinking about food. 

I have this weird fear of cutting my fingers on soda can tabs so I always use my shirt to open them. Today I decided that I needed to get over it so I opened a can like a normal god damn adult who functions normally without fear of everything.

Fuckin sliced my finger open.

I have decided that this universe is actually out to get me

Confession

I hate that I love you.
You take too much space in my heart and in my head; I feel like I don’t function normally anymore.
How can feelings be so strong? I didn’t know that it would end up like this.
Let me live my life alone.
I don’t deserve to think about you. I would feel better knowing that you are in good hands, and not in mine.

-Saeyoung

Republicans be like..
  • Them: Higher education isn't a right! You have to pay tuition to go to college!
  • Me: But pretty much every job, even entry-level jobs, require at least a bachelor's degree.
  • Them: Work an hourly job that doesn't require a four-year degree!
  • Me: Ok, then can we raise the minimum wage so I can work full time and, like, live and eat and other essential functions?
  • Them: No! If you want to make decent money, go to college and get a degree!
  • Me: But...
  • Them: Ugh, this generation is so lazy. I think I'll pray about it.

hey guys. i love u all!!!

“But Katara and Zuko are both so fiery and passionate and stubborn!!!! They’d just fight and argue all the time”

ok but remember when they were imprisoned together in Ba Sing Se, and Katara apologised to Zuko, her sworn enemy who had made her life miserable, for yelling at him? How she then offered to heal his scar, something that had afflicted him for years, with sacred healing water so that he could be rid of his painful past??

remember when Katara was angry at him when he first joined the Gaang and he let her shout and vent at him because he knew her anger was justified?? How Zuko listened to her and made efforts to mend the rift between them, asking what he could do to earn her forgiveness?? Remember how much kinder she was to him when she made the decision to forgive him?

are both Zuko and Katara fiery and passionate and stubborn?? certainly! are they unreasonably hotheaded to the point where they’d have nonsense arguments, refuse to listen to each other, and not function healthily as a couple as a result? If your answer is ‘yes’, I don’t know what to tell you