like don't be mad i wouldn't do that to you

anonymous asked:

What do you think of shomadot 2? How does that program stand against shomadot 1? Which one you like the most?

shoma’s basic skating is better now than when he first used turandot, but turandot 1.0 is a much better program than turandot 2.0. i think one of the reasons for this is the new music cuts, and consequently the choreo that goes with the music cuts. one of the biggest changes is the music used during his step sequence and middle section of the program. turandot 1.0 used faster music and had some pretty interesting choreo moments (hitch kick, toe-tapping) during the stsq, the stsq in turandot 2.0 goes back to the same motif used at the beginning of the program and is slower, and the choreo doesn’t stand out as much. the stsq, the 3S on the spike in the music - the entire middle section up to the pause is superior in turandot 1.0.

“nessun dorma” also drags on for far too long in turandot 2.0. it was much more effective in turandot 1.0 when it was only used near the end; in the new program it feels like shoma is just jumping through most of it. by the time you get to the choreo sequence, you’re already tired of nessun dorma. overall, turandot 2.0 is a more one-note program, there isn’t enough variation in the music or choreo and it feels like shoma is skating the same way throughout the whole thing. this doesn’t make the program an eyesore, because i still like the way he moves, but it does make it boring, and i wouldn’t blame anyone if they came out of the program not being able to remember much about it.

i just don’t see the point of shoma bringing turandot back this season. it was a fine vehicle for him in his senior debut season, a warhorse but it suited his drama and power, and the choreo fit the music and was interesting enough to keep me engaged. if he’d decided to go back to it years later, i might’ve been fine with it. but it’s only been 2 seasons. those performances from 2015-16 are still fresh in people’s minds, and now he’s burdened with the challenge of surpassing what he’s already done, which, imo, he will not succeed in because the new program simply isn’t as good as the old one. there are some bits of choreo from turandot 1.0 that really stood out to me - the pause, the spreadeagle near the end, the choreo sequence - that shoma kept or slightly modified in turandot 2.0, but while these bits of choreo seemed suitable and fresh in the original program, in the new program it just makes me think, ok, i’ve already seen this before, and i’ve seen it done better.

the new program is fine enough to look at on its own, but what is the point of it? i know he said he wants to show his growth and part of that is by increasing his technical content, and i gotta say i’m impressed by all the jumps he landed at lombardia, but…that doesn’t make me like the program more. i just think he’s capable of so much more; loco proved that, legends proved that. this program doesn’t feel like a step forward to me. if anything, it feels like a step back.

anonymous asked:

this isn't really about Onion, but i've been looking at lots of blogs like yours and i'm starting to get uncomfortable that i'm a 17.5 yr old girl dating a 26 yr old man. i feel like he emotionally abuses me sometimes, he gets mad when i fall asleep early and tells me i don't love him. once, he told me he took 10 of his antidepressants at once and i was sobbing and shaking because he wouldn't respond to my texts. he said he wanted to die and i'd get over it. (1/2)

an hour and a half after he told me that, he was suddenly perfectly fine and he told me he actually only took 2 pills. i don’t know what to do. do you have any advice?

~~~~~~~~

I don’t know you or your boyfriend personally so I don’t want to come off like I’m telling you what to do, but I’m going to pass along what “knowledge” I have and hopefully it will help. I’m going to say “you” a lot, but I’m talking in general, not personal. There are two major red flags I see.

1. The age difference

There is a HUGE power imbalance when a 17 year old dates an adult and it’s very layered so bear with me. 

I’m going to be saying “power imbalance” and “power scale” a lot. What I mean by that is if someone has a higher position on the power scale in a relationship, they could use that against the person in the lower position to manipulate/control them. The further apart the people on the scale, the easier it is for the person higher on the scale to control the person lower. I hope this makes sense.

Emotional imbalance: I’m not saying it always happens, but it WAY easier for a 26 year old to emotionally manipulate a 17 year old than another 26 year old. A great example of this is actually Greg!

You can see that the relationships he started with 17 year olds and an 18 year old lasted WAY longer than the two relationships he had with women in their 20′s (Green and purple dots, they’re not actually dots they’re lines too but the relationships were so short the dots overlap). Both of the relationships with the women in their 20′s only lasted a few weeks and this is because they saw RIGHT THROUGH his emotionally manipulative tactics. Greg said that Hannah broke up with him because he told her he loved her after two weeks. This not normal. It’s a RED FLAG and it seems she took notice. Compare that to Lainey who was a 17 year old high school student when they began talking. They started dating Feb 27th and were already engaged by March. His pickup line was asking Lainey why they think he is their soulmate. Love-bombing a googley eyed teenager with a crush so they can get the relationship moving very fast and very intense. RED FLAG!

If you want, Greg’s ex Adrienne wrote a long email about her experience with Greg. (She was 26, he was 25) Although it is very long, I HIGHLY recommend it because she points out a lot of Greg’s manipulative techniques and she actually confronted him about it.

There is also a common technique adult men use on teenagers, I don’t know what it’s called, but they’ll say things like: “I don’t usually date someone so young, but you’re mature for your age.” “I’m afraid to talk to you because I might fall for you and you are so young.” etc etc.. they know full well what they are doing. It’s 100% BULLSHIT to make the teenager feel like they must be special to gain the interest of an adult and that THEY need to PROVE themselves to the adult. RED FLAG!! This puts the adult higher up on the power scale.

Financial imbalance: Dating a 26 year old as a teenager can be very appealing because 26 year olds generally make more money than other teenage potential dates. It could seem very luxurious. Like dating an 18 year old boyfriend, picking you up in his used car, getting a slice of pizza, then going to his parents house to watch a movie. Compare that to getting picked up in a nicer car, get taken out to a decent restaurant, then go over to his own apartment! It makes the teenager feel like an adult. That you’re more special than other teenagers you know. Again, puts the adult higher on the power scale.

Another financial aspect is dependence. Most 17 year olds are dependent on their parents and trying to figure out what they will do with their life. Go to school? Start working? Try to move out? An adult dating a teenager can give them the illusion of financial independence. Move in with me! It might feel like freedom at first. You aren’t dependent on your parents, you don’t have to worry about your future for the time being… but this could all be a trap. You went from being dependent on your parents to being dependent on your partner and they might use that against you. This very much puts the adult way higher on the power scale than the teenager.

This can also get tricky when wanting to leave a live-in relationship as a teenager. Moving back home with your parents? Starting financially over from square one and having to listen to “I-told-you-so’s” from your family? It almost seems better to just stick it out and wait for the good times.

Life Experience imbalance: 26 years olds tend to have more life experience than a teenager. A 17 year old teenager doesn’t really know what is normal and not normal in a relationship, how fast should things move along. What is normal and not normal in the bedroom. They would not know how to properly introduce things like BDSM or poly relationships into their life and generally adults will take advantage of that when that’s something they want.

Brain development: A 17 year old brain isn’t fully developed. They just aren’t it’s fact. That’s why in the US the drinking age is 21. The rational/decision making/consequence predicting part of the brain is not fully developed. It doesn’t matter how high your grades are, how mature your body looks, or how mature everyone says you act. You’re going to make dumb decisions, we all do it at that age. 

2. Emotional Abuse

This part I will get personal. It’s good that you recognize what he is doing might be emotional abuse because it is. Threatening suicide is 100% a fucked up, emotionally manipulative things to do to someone. The fact that he only took two pills tells me he had NO intention of dying and only wanted to control you. Again, Greg is a great example of this. In 2012 he publicly threatened suicide because he was trying to gain the attention of his ex-wife so he could convince her to cancel their alimony. (Here is his posts and videos from that time.) What did he say about it years later? That horrible time in 2012 when he was sooo emotionally distraught he was thinking about killing himself?

In the 2016 video “Re: List of Onision Abuse Accusations”, Greg admits he used threatening to kill himself as a manipulation tactic against Skye: “That is true. I did publicly threaten to kill myself. I have no defense for that because publicly threatening to kill yourself is really stupid. Especially since that was a manipulative tactic and I had no actual intention of killing myself.” He says he was angry at Skye for lying in court to get more money from him.

It was fake. He faked it. He admitted it was an emotionally manipulative tactic. No intentional of killing himself. 100% bullshit, 100% RED FLAG!

NOW.. If any of this resonates with you and you believe you are in an emotionally abusive relationship and want to get out, you can do it! 

Emotionally manipulative people like control. They might make it hard to leave. I think the best way to get is no contact. Break up and walk away, block them, ignore them. They might try all kinds of things to gain back control over you like threatening suicide, trying to get you back, or spreading lies about you. Hopefully none of that will happen, but if someone does threaten to commit suicide after you break up with them and they can’t seem to be talked out of it, try not to get back together with them to make them feel better. I haven’t been able to find any guide or what to do on the internet about a situation like that (I tried to find one a few months ago for a friend, but had no luck), but I knew someone in HS in a situation like that. They called the police and their ex had to explain to the police and hospital that they weren’t actually suicidal.

If anyone has any better advice for a situation like that, please let me know. Again, I had a hard time finding information online.

I did find this article about how to leave a narcissist, but I think it could apply to any emotionally manipulative person because it gives steps to to prevent the narcissist/emotional manipulator from gaining back control over you.

If anyone has any better advice or want to correct me please do so!

Good luck anon!!!

anonymous asked:

Um. For what it's worth, I don't agree with what Mad did, or Mare. Or Anti, when he hurt Ollie. But. Not to call everyone out but I'm gonna call everyone out, y'all are ALL terrible at times, all of the egos, and most of you have some serious evil streaks. But so do we, the fans. Otherwise, we wouldn't be so drawn to you. So, I don't like it but even if it escalates further, I'm not casting stones. We love them all too much to let any of them die. (not a challenge please don't kill anyone)

No, I think you make a good point here. Something that I’ve never wanted to do on the blog is make all the characters completely good or completely evil. That’s just not how people work. We all have our evil streaks, but some just hide them better than others. (I used to hide mine real well before I started writing on this blog haha)

So, no. You don’t have to feel forced to take sides in this or cast stones (a very appropriate choice of words, “Let he who has never sinned cast the first stone” and we see how well that ended). Neither side is entirely innocent in this, and that’s the way I intended it. The characters are more relatable that way.

Because none of us are perfect and neither are they.

  • Jesus: I'm mad at the both of you. Don't talk to me.
  • Brandon: What did I do? Your girlfriend couldn't tell you she was pregnant and wanted an abortion so I just supported her through her own decision so she wouldn't have to do it alone. I was there for her for you. And it wasn't like I was the only one who knew: Grandma knew and kept it from you, Mom knew and kept it from you, Momma knew and kept it from you and Mariana knew and kept it from you. We all thought it was for the best.
  • Mariana: Yeah, and what did I do? Brandon told me and I was mad that my best friend thought I couldn't be trusted with the information so first I tried to make Emma feel bad about getting an abortion and then when that didn't make me feel any better, I tweeted about it. But I mean, if you should be mad at anyone, it's Brandon.
  • Jesus: You right.
  • Brandon: ... Fucking twins.

anonymous asked:

it's super silly to be mad at jk Rowling for writing slytherins as she did, since as a writer I understand why she did it. It kept to her theme, to kept to her strictly important-details way of writing, and things like that wouldn't have driven the story forward unless she drastically changed whatever she already had preplanned,, don't blame the writer for not doing your headcanon pls (I love slytherins but come on, don't blame rowling)

This is going to sound incredibly wild to you but here’s the thing, writing is art and every art, specially the ones that are incredibly popular, is open for interpretation, discussion and even critiques. I am not pressing a gun to her forehead or even talking to her directly, I am simply stating my opinion on something I believe she should have done differently because it feeds to a negative stigma. You say it would have gone against her usual style of writing of only including the most important details but, it would have taken little to no time to add an extra paragraph that showed Slytherins participating in the battle. “Don’t blame the writer for not doing the headcanon” oh? So some Slytherins not being complete villains and actually having morals is a headcanon now? Say that to Regulus Black. Say that to the eleven year olds that will come to Hogwarts in the years to follow, get sorted into Slytherin and booed or shunned in the process! I truly have zero interest in discussing this with you and I’ll continue to show my dislike to the way my house was treated.

PS. I’m a writer too ;)

knocked up starters.
  • I proposed to you like an idiot and you said no!
  • It's a girl - buy some pink stuff!
  • Guess what the fuck's up?
  • _____ is going into labor and you are not fucking here
  • You know what I'm gonna have to do now? I'm going have to kill you
  • I'm gonna pop a fucking cap in your ass.
  • You're dead, you're Tupac, you are fucking Biggie, you piece of shit!
  • Marriage is like a freak, unfunny version of Everybody Loves Raymond, only it doesn't last 22 minutes. It lasts forever.
  • Do you want to do it doggy-style?
  • You're not going to treat me like a dog.
  • I'm not treating you like a dog. It's doggy-style. It's just in the style. We don't have to go outside or anything.
  • I'm naked...
  • Did we have sex?
  • I'm pregnant.
  • Fuck off!
  • I assumed you were wearing a patch, or like a--like a dental dam, or one of those butterfly clips or something.
  • What is a dental dam?
  • We have to help them raise the baby.
  • Why did we go to Costco and buy a year's supply of condoms if you weren't gonna use 'em, man?
  • I can't believe you did this. You messed everything up.
  • You gotta know all the tricks like, for example, if a woman's on top she can't get pregnant. It's just gravity.
  • I love you. You're the best thing that ever happened to me.
  • I'm the best thing that ever happened to you?
  • Now I'm starting to feel sorry for you.
  • If I didn't care about these things, you wouldn't care about anything. Care more.
  • I like "Spider-Man".
  • Look, I don't even know what I'm supposed to say to you
  • You think that just because you don't yell, you're not mean? This is mean!
  • We don't have the heart to tell him it's herpes.
  • I'm gonna throw you into my DeLorean, gun it to 88.
  • I'm sorry I told you to screw your bong.
  • Why is everyone so mad at you?
  • Do you ever get so bored, you stare at your balls?
  • So what do you think? Should we have sex tonight?
  • I'm just really constipated.
  • Man, my balls are shaved, my pubes are trimmed, I'm ready to fuckin' rock this shit!
  • If I go in there and see fuckin' pubes sprinkled on the toilet seat, I'm gonna fuckin' lose my mind!
  • You're embarrassing me in front of company!
  • anko: honey i just wanna let you know that if you evr wanted to smoke weed or drink or anything like. it's okay. your mother and i would just really prefer you do it in the house so we can make sure you're safe
  • mirai, fourteen years old and studying diligently for the upcoming chunin exams: uhm... okay? i really dont want to though. you don't have to worry about that
  • anko: just if you do. like. i wouldn't be mad. your mom would make that face like she does but she'd be okay with it too
  • mirai: thanks but seriously it's fine
  • anko: also like don't get tangled up with dealers or anything. i can get it for you if you want - safe stuff
  • mirai: anko seriously
  • anko: just making sure u kno
  • mirai: ok mom
  • anko: ew u know i hate when u call me that ok ok im leaving!
  • Kanan: Yeah, it's sprained
  • Ruby: Uuuuh~
  • Kanan: I'm sorry, that's the risk when you walk around at night. Here, hold still
  • Kanan: *princess carries*
  • Ruby: !!!!
  • Kanan: Is this fine?
  • Ruby: Y-yeah!
  • Ruby: ...Um, if I tell Dia it was my own fault, I'm sure she won't get mad at you
  • Kanan: I don't really care, as long as you are okay
  • Ruby: ////
  • Ruby: B-but she might not let me watch the stars with you anymore!
  • Kanan: Ah! Yeah, I wouldn't want that. You really love the stars, don't you? Watching them with you is really nice
  • Ruby:
  • Ruby: Y-yes, I love the stars...
  • Kanan: And we're back. Looks like Dia is asleep. Should I take you to your room?
  • Ruby: !!!
  • Ruby: N-n-no, that's fine, thank you!! Um, have a safe trip home!
  • Kanan: Okay, then
  • Kanan: *kisses Ruby's cheek*
  • Kanan: Let's do this again. Have a good night, Ruby
  • Ruby:
  • Ruby:
  • Ruby: (I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO SLEEP NOW)

Do you ever just see someone comment on something on Facebook acting like an expert in the field that /you/ specialize in (and say something absolutely 100% wrong) and you feel this blinding rage…?

anonymous asked:

Hey, I rly hope u can help I think I made 2 mistakes I told my INTJ gf that it'sexhausting how emotional she is around me and I told her that I don't know why she was telling me about a certain problem cause it was obvious that I wouldn't be able to help. I realised this was her way of showing me that I'm important. After not telling me anything bout her life anymore she started to tell me a bit. But something's still different. Is she still mad at me? Will she ever treat me like she did before?

AHHHHH she was opening up to you why did you do that? T^T

She’s not mad, she’s hurt - which looks like she’s mad. Apologize to her. Show that you care about hearing of her life and problems. It’s better to solve conflicts openly for a good couple dynamics. When she’s telling you those things, she doesn’t really want you to solve them for her - INTJs are pretty good at solving problems on their own - but she wants to feel your support and your affection. 

Things can go back to how they were before only if you manage to show her that you actually care - and not if you’re just saying that to make her stop being mad. And if you don’t look sincere, she’ll be able to tell. So good luck 

anonymous asked:

You hate Mai so much for no reason. Zuko needs to be called out. He's not this perfect-do-no-wrong angel in their relationship. Mai was right to leave him. I don't think she knew the extent of his suffering because he wouldn't tell her anything. She was also allowed to talk to him like that because she was mad at him in S&S. When she told Zuko the truth I was proud of her. She was mad at Zuko & this showed she was loyal & loved him in the end. Zuko was insensitive to not compare their fathers.

I don’t hate Mαi, and my reasons for disliking the way her character was handled are explained very well in the anti tags on my blog.

Zuko needs to be called out. He’s not this perfect-do-no-wrong angel in their relationship.

Woo, we have a second anon whose post is going on the “Zuko fans do not think Zuko is perfect” wall!

Mαi was right to leave him.

I agree; they are both incompatible with each other and function badly in a relationship.

I don’t think she knew the extent of his suffering because he wouldn’t tell her anything.

And whose fault is that, when Mαi is the one who shut Zuko down whenever he tried to open up to her previously? If she didn’t ask to hear his whole life story, if she thinks Zuko going back into the war room is “just a dumb meeting,” if she doesn’t even try to understand why Zuko joined the Avatar…Zuko had no reason to believe him talking to her would help him.

She was also allowed to talk to him like that because she was mad at him in S&S.

Are you the same anon as before? If not, here is where I explain how wrong that line of thinking is.

When she told Zuko the truth I was proud of her. 

Why? It’s clear her telling the truth carried absolutely no risk, since she wasn’t even reprimanded for her actions, unlike when Zuko told the truth during the eclipse, when his life was actually in danger. Worse, Mai excused her bad behavior rather than learning from it. This inhibits her ability to learn from her mistakes the way Zuko has done in the past, and is one of the reasons she lacks character development.

She was mad at Zuko & this showed she was loyal & loved him in the end. Zuko was insensitive to not compare their fathers.

Loyalty isn’t an on-again-off-again thing like the Mαiko relationship is. If you’re loyal, you’re loyal at the beginning, all the way through to the end. If your loyalties change, you have to demonstrate that they have by accepting responsibility for your actions. It was Mαi who was insensitive, because by comparing their fathers, she minimized the actual danger Zuko’s father posed to him that Mai’s father did not, and ignored the fact that she was defending her decision to side with her father, when Zuko’s entire redemption arc hinged on condemning his decision to side with his father and seeking to make restitution.

Boy, they’re out in force tonight, aren’t they?

Conversation at my boyfriend's family Christmas Dinner
  • *little baby cousin running around in his fab fairy costume*
  • Uncle: (to his mom) Why do you let him do that? He is going to be messed up when he is older.
  • Mom: Yeah, he isn't, he just hangs out with all the girls on the street! He loves dress up!
  • Uncle: But if you keep letting him dress like that you'll turn him gay!
  • Boyfriend: You don't turn gay.
  • Uncle: ...
  • Boyfriend: And even if you did, it's not a bad thing.
  • Uncle: So you're telling me if your son dressed like that, you wouldn't be mad?
  • Boyfriend: No, actually. I would take him to the store and buy him his favourite dress there!
  • I don't think I could possibly love him more.

anonymous asked:

Is it healthy to write self-depreciating about yourself on scraps of sticky notes and then burn them in a candle because you don't want anyone to see them because you're scared of what would happen if they did, but you felt like you had to write them because if you didn't it wouldn't get out of your head and you just wanted to stop thinking about it?

gG: do write the insults because youre mad at yourself or so you can burn the stuff you hate feeling about yourself and be glad they’ve been destroyed???

gG: because i think theyre both okay ways to feel, but maybe they only help a little

gG: sometimes when i was alone i would feel like talking to somebody and there was no one around but grandpa, and then later not even him

gG: so i would write letters and burn them in the stove! lots of letters, letters to me and my parents that i never knew or sometimes they were letters telling grandpa how mad i was at him for dying XC

gG: getting the words out helped but they were like a scab over the wound and that wasnt getting better

gG: what really helped burn those thoughts so they stayed gone was saying them out loud to other people :o

gG: i tried it in my group therapy session!  i got REALLY DAMN LOUD about it too!!!! we pretended rose was my grandpa and i told her what i wanted to tell him and when we were done the words didn’t go back in my head

gG: grandpa you COMPLETE ASSHOLE YOU CAN’T RAISE A LITTLE GIRL IN THE FUCKING WILDERNESS YOU HAVE A HEART CONDITION ARE YOU NUTS???????? DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS GOING TO BE WHEN SHE LEAVES THE BUNKER AND FINDS OUT THE WORLD IS NOTHING LIKE WHAT YOU TAUGHT HER TO EXPECT AT ALL YOU DUMB PARANOID DODDERING SHITDICK?!!!!

gG: like that!!

gG: i thought i wouldn’t love him anymore if i yelled at him like that or said bad things about him in front of people :(

gG: but it turns out really what happens is everyone starts clapping and you get told you did something really brave by fighting back against a negative emotion and owning your anger then someone else in the group starts crying says their dad was a liar about something else that’s way more terrible than what i went through

gG: and then i realize that being sad was a step toward me being able to tell her shes brave for sharing her pain and she will know i know what i am talking about!! :D

gG: and if shes brave for telling the world shes had it with something that makes her feel bad then how come i feel shame when i want to do the same thing? its DUMB and IRRATIONAL and i choose not to put up with it anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

gG: what i am attempting to say here is that if you keep burning those feelings in a candle you will feel better inside but they will only grow back

gG: instead put them out in the light with someone you can trust to hear them!

gG: they wont stop hurting right away, but youll become stronger than they are until you realize youre so strong and brave you can carry those feelings and talk about them and not feel so alone in the badness

gG: and one day they WILL lose their power over you and just become a memory of a time you didnt like yourself very much before you knew yourself better!

gG: does that make any sense?

vintagelespionage  asked:

Hi Liam, I was wondering if you could help me understand something. I struggle to understand culture appropriation sometimes (I'm a white scottish female) because I don't really feel like I have much of a culture, the closest thing would be wearing kilts, old scots literature, ceilidh dancing ect. but if say an American were to do any of these things I wouldn't be offended. I suppose we Scots aren't often oppressed for these things so does that mean it doesn't count? I saw a post recently (cont)

(cont) about white girls wearing bindis and the girl was mad because we haven’t had to ‘take any of the oppression for that’ which is true in most cases. But then shouldn’t people wear whatever they want? If it’s not on your body then why does it bother you, y’know? People wear rosary beads and crosses as a fashion statement and it doesn’t bother me. This is when I fear I start to sound very ignorant and so would appreciate your say so I’m not a complete asshole and don’t even know why :)

It’s good that you’re worried about feeling ignorant and are seeking to correct this, rather than choosing to stay uninformed. So good on you for that!

I in no way claim to be super well-informed on this, and as a whitecishetmale am probably not the best person to ask? But I’ll do my best and leave the floor open for people to correct me, and recommend you keep an eye on the notes for better info from others.

The big problem with cultural appropriation, and why it’s not really considered an issue for us, is the institutionalised oppression associated with cultural adornments like bindis, burqas, etc. While South Asian people get abused and oppressed for wearing symbols of their faith and beliefs (especially amidst Western culture), white people get praise for wearing ~alt fashion~ and it’s pretty gross. Living in Scotland, you probably know someone who at least once has referred to a bindi with the term “P*ki dot”. I have. While disgusting slurs like this are still being used by white people, there is no justification for some to also decide it’s now something they’d like to have for themselves. It’s parasitic and weird and confusing wow

Appropriation of symbols of Christianity can’t be compared, especially in a Western civilisation, because they have little to no history of oppression behind them. It doesn’t bother you that crosses are worn as a fashion statement because people don’t, or very very very rarely, get beat up on the street for wearing one. You’ve probably never been made fun of on a playground for having one. They just aren’t comparable.

A culture is a shared experience. History, belief, upbringing, prosperity, and especially hardship are all a part of that. If you come from another background and adopt parts of that culture without experiencing all of these facets (especially as a fashion statement), that’s appropriation. Sometimes it’s beneficial! Sometimes it’s problematic, other times it’s straight-up racist. But that is for people of that culture to decide, not the people who just want to wear pretty forehead jewellery.

I don’t know if this was the post you’re already referring to but I’m gonna redirect you to this post that my friend Vondell recently reblogged for reference, because it displays a really important perspective about that idea of the way these symbols are treated in a Western society

Also something that can be applied to this discussion is this thread posted by my friend Marina, about white people’s use of the n-word, as it contains some great points about institutionalised oppression and white people’s unnecessary need to control facets of a race

Again, this is all just stuff I’ve picked up, so anyone please feel free to correct or develop on anything you see here!

anonymous asked:

I really don't get why Sam doesn't just tell his new BFF to fuck off! Once again he outed him by saying I know where he's not! And posting a pic of him with Cait! Like WTF? Why would you be doing that to your good friend or not? Even if it is the truth why do you have to say that? I would think that Sam wouldn't want that but I guess I'm wrong bc he keeps interacting with him. And don't tell me for one second that Sam was telling the truth when he says he doesn't follow his madness. Bc he has to

Because Sam has good manners? Because his new BFF is very publicly promoting the show- perhaps in a bid to keep the very event you desire from occurring, anon. But it does seem to me that the “friendship” is a bit one sided, no? Lots of mentions and attention coming from Shat and only an occasional acknowledgement from Sam. And no further “get togethers” have come to fruition despite Sam’s rather long stay in LA a while back….and Shat still wants to meet Cait but it hasn’t ever been arranged…..what’s up with that? (And why would he even want to meet Cait if she wasn’t something to Sam? If a certain someone else was something to Sam then you would think he would want to meet HER instead!)
As to the pic Shat retweeted saying he knows where Sam is not. He’s again crafting his words to create an implication- but all he really said there was that he knows that Sam is currently NOT on his honeymoon with Cait. No problem with that. I never thought Sam was on his honeymoon this week either. Shat didn’t say that Cait and Sam weren’t together this week, or that Sam is with someone else- just that wherever he is, and whoever he is with, he is not currently honeymooning.
Seems to me that Sam is doing the best he can with a rather touchy situation. He’s being polite, but distant, to shat, and staying completely out of the “madness”. I do agree that he is likely aware of it but he has gone on record as not endorsing or condoning it and refuses to participate in it which I think is actually the best way to handle it if he cannot get shat to stop the “madness” and it appears that no one can. Shat has publicly backed down twice but restarted within days both times- suggesting that someone intervened but ultimately was ignored. I actually respect Sam for taking the high road here. He has engaged personally with the fans who were attacked and let them know that it wasn’t with his blessing or at his request. But at the end of the day he has no control over what shat says, or who shat claims as a friend. All he can really do is continue to take the high road until shat finds a new object for his affections

anonymous asked:

You know what I don't get? Psycho fans. This girl got mad Sophia, Lottie and Fizzy wouldn't stop as she was SCREECHING at them! Like, babe, they'll stop if you're polite, god.

The question is why do the fans want pix with them? No offense, but that is not a phenomenon I understand. Meh. But many of the fans are spoiled immature brats, so throwing a tantrum when they don’t get their way is what they do.

Sophia’s been stopping for fans quite a bit, though.

Interesting. Any public separation now (she went to Buffalo while Liam was at the US Open in Queens) can be used to shore up a break-up narrative later. And if Eleanor is the template, the ramping up in fan service means this is beginning of the end. She’s catering to her “fans” before she’s cut loose and on her own. That’s also why she’s very publicly hanging with Lottie, Fizzy and Lou Teasdale. They have similar fanbases. No doubt she’s also going to go the fashion and “modeling” route like Eleanor too. So this is her doing her own PR. More good news. Everything’s coming together slowly but surely.