light through veins

Self Love Meditation

If you’re ever feeling really down about yourself, especially your body, close your eyes and imagine that there’s a closed up lotus in your heart.

Take in a deep breath, and with your breath, imagine you’re pulling sparkling white light into your body. Imagine the light flowing through your veins, trickling from your lungs into your arms, your legs.

Exhale, imagining that you’re exhaling thick, oily black smoke.

When you inhale, think the words “Love within,”

When you exhale, think the words, “Shines without”

With each inhale, you bring more light into your body, and with each exhale of the black smoke, your lotus begins to glow. The glow is faint at first, but with each exhale, it get bright, the petals fuller, until the lotus is a blinding white and blossoms.

Feel the warmth of the glow from the blossoming lotus, feel the peace and love within you reaching out, making your skin warm, making you glow.

i’m tired of living for other people.
i want to live for me.
and i know that right now,
as courage and light
run through my veins,
i think i can do anything.

so this is for my future self.
be it the me in 10 minutes
or 10 days
or 10 months
or even 10 years.

i beg you.
do not turn into this creature
that only lives for others.
you’re humble and compassionate.
and we love that about you
because that’s part of who you are.

but there’s more than this.
there’s so many wonderful things out there.
things that will make you grow,
and growth is what you need.

there’s also so much that you’ll never see.
and that’s fine. that’s how it’s supposed to be.
because the mystery makes you want to keep going.
it keeps you alive. it gives you hope.
not knowing gives you the oportunity for change.
and change…
change is everything
you’ll ever

—  14.07.2016 b.m.

For someone who’d always felt as if he were a city person caged in their small town, their new surroundings (along with the help of alcohol) had brought back the energy in his stride, along with a somewhat foolish desire to forget everything that had occurred back home for a few fleeting moments. A light buzz rushed through his veins as he walked – whether due to the alcohol or the city right now, he wasn’t entirely sure. His gaze however, soon flickered to that of a club which had come into view, the beat of the music seeming to beckon CJ closer as if to remind him of what he’d been missing in their old town. A lopsided smirk tugged at the corners of his mouth and he turned to the person nearest to him, only to gesture back to the direction they’d managed to have gone in. “Mmm, whadd’ya say? You in?”