light noise

The Beetles Don't Live in the Static- Voidtrip AU

Based on @electricmindart voidtrip AU which I adore. Here is some quick angst for you all. Slight Caddimoose
I stand in the freezing bathroom,my hands running over the scars and cuts that mask my skin. I had another trip last night… And they were there again. I shake as the heating broke ages ago and I’m wearing just my underwear right now. The feeling of the blood running down my body like rain from various cuts I’d done to myself last night. I had to scratch them off,I really did. The bruise on my scalp throbs like an alarm and I stay still. I know what’s about to happen. I know what is about to happen.

I’m thrown into a trip,the overwhelming static lights and noises make me feel sick. I want it to stop. I want it to stop. I feel my legs buckle and I must of whacked my head on the sink as the headache increases like someone driving a burning hot pin into my skull. Then I hear it getting louder. The clicking. They are coming. The beetles are coming. They crawl up my skin; biting and cutting me. I dig my nails into my legs and pull them out. I scratch and scratch and scratch at my legs. I feel myself falling and more beetles grab onto me. The neon static visions get brighter and the noises get louder and  worse. I feel myself land with a thud and everything goes black.

“Caddy?” I slowly open my eyes to find myself on the floor where Ian is. About 25 seconds later,Ian appears and hugs me. “Jesus! You’re hurt. Was it the beetles again?” I feel my mind go fuzzy and my brain hurt but I just nod. Tears fall down Ian’s back and he just wipes them away. “Well… you’re here now. Everything is gonna be OK. I’ll find something to cover you up. You’ll get sick standing in just your underwear. He sits me down in the armchair and gets a old T-shirt and trousers and hands them to me. I put them on slowly,trying not to make me cuts hurt any more than they do. Ian drapes a blanket over my shoulder and clean the fresh wounds.

He pulls me back into a hug and I crumple into his arms. I know that a trip won’t happen here. He reads some of the letters he gets from the printer while he strokes me,careful around where he knows it hurts. He doesn’t deserve me. I must waste so much of his time and I mess everything up. I end up bursting back into tears and I hear Ian’s voice go sad. “Oh Caddy. Please don’t cry.” He pulls me closer and wipes my eyes. “Beetles don’t like the void. Or the static the TV makes. You’re here with me and I promise you won’t get hurt”



“Why do you let me stay? You are just my imagination!”

“I’m not. I’m real. Just because I only live here doesn’t mean I don’t exist.”

“Will you ever leave me?”

“No. Caddy. I never will”

anonymous asked:

I just want you to know that your voltron shitposts are a gift to our species

honestly?? where’s my nobel prize

  • shiro: “I need an adult” pidge: “…you… are an adult?” shiro: “yes but I need a better one”
  • hunk’s hairstyle is definitely inspired by young han solo
  • *paladin sneezes* allura and coran, horrified: “what the fuck was that”
  • pidge is too short for her head to be a good armrest for anyone, but does that stop lance from trying?? no
  • allura is the living embodiment of bringing a gun to a knife fight
  • sometimes lance will go to the training deck while keith is training for the express purpose of making lightsaber noises whenever keith swings his sword to piss him off
  • coran is scandalized by hunk and pidge’s lab etiquette
    • pidge’s approach to science is “safety goggles are for squares” and hunk’s is “eyeballing it is a valid method of measurement right”
    • i mean pidge is 14 and hunk is an engineering student what was he expecting
    • he gets hunk a god damn ruler for his birthday
  • lance: “- so the most important thing is that we get in and out without being seen at all. any ideas?” keith: “okay, so what I’m thinking is that i’ll bust into the main chamber and go for zarkon-” lance: “alright, I’m gonna explain again, and you’re gonna tell me where I lost you”
autistic studying advice

by an autistic undergrad

1) Don’t trust all study guides by NTs

Their brains are wired differently and some things that work for them won’t work for us. There’s a chance those tips and tricks won’t do anything for you, which might make you feel like a failure. You aren’t! If something doesn’t work, move on. It’s okay.

2) If you have executive dysfunction, laziness and lack of motivation is not your problem

When you struggle with executing tasks it may feel like you are lazy and aren’t motivated enough, but that’s not necessarily true! You might be hella motivated and still not be able to do a task. Trying to motivate yourself in that case will only make you more frustrated.

3) Get distractions out of the way

Little things that would not distract a neurotypical person might distract you, in which case you won’t be able to work to your full capacity. Build a sensory friendly environment with no noises, bright lights, bad smells, etc. Use ear plugs or music if you need to. Get stim toys if you stim a lot to concentrate. Good environment is very important and is probably the reason why you struggle at school/college/uni where your senses might be overstimulated.

4) If you tend to hyperfocus, learn when it happens

Hyperfocus can be incredibly useful for studying, so if it happens to you, try to identify when it happens. For me I tend to hyperfocus when there are absolutely no distractions (for me that often means when I have headphones on and I’m alone). Then replicate those factors to get more done.

5) Learn ways around executive dysfunction and limited energy

This is the most difficult part. Studying when you have problems with executing tasks and limited spoons (energy resources) is tough. Here’s how you can deal with it.

6) Understand your priorities

You will not be able to do as much as NTs do in one day. Deal with it now. Understand that simple tasks such as brushing your teeth or talking on the phone also require energy. So prioritize. Assume you can only do one thing today, the most important/urgent one, and do that first. Then the less important thing. And so on.

7) “Don’t half-ass things” is a lie

Half-ass things. Quarter-ass things. If you can only do one math problem today, do it. That will be one less math problem later. If you can only read a few pages of a textbook today, do it. It’s also easy to think “if I can’t write the essay and finish that project today, might as well do nothing”. That’s a lie too. Do a small thing but do something. Do something badly but still do it. You might be able to fix it later. There’s no shame in being disabled, no matter what society makes you think.

8) Do the most complicated thing first

If you have several tasks and one requires more executive functioning, do that first. Your planning skills are probably at best right after you wake up, before you have time to spend any energy. So that’s the best time to do tasks with many steps or to plan tasks ahead.

9) Rest and take breaks right

It’s important to take breaks in between work, but you have to do it right. You might be tempted to do something useful for a break to be productive - like take a walk or read a book or talk to someone. Do not, or at least do not unless you are absolutely sure. Switching to another task requires mental energy, so that will only deplete your energy sources.

For breaks, do something ridiculously easy. Go on social media. Listen to a song and sing along. Watch a YouTube video. Stim. Daydream. Even lay down and close your eyes for five minutes. Just don’t switch to tasks that also require energy.

10) Don’t try to learn by repetition

Studies show that learning by repetition doesn’t work for us. It will not help you make more connections in your brain. Instead, do different tasks. Read from a book. Write down important points from the book. Read them out loud. Try to repeat them without looking. Pretend to explain it to someone. Answer questions related to the material. Draw it. Watch a video about it. Make a mnemonic for it. Whatever. Just don’t sit there reading it again and again.

11) Be kind to yourself

Your energy levels and capabilities will fluctuate from day to day, and you can’t always know how it will turn out. On some days I can write an essay from scratch in one sitting. On others I struggle to make myself a cup of tea. That’s normal, and it’s not your fault. Blaming yourself for it will only upset you and make it less likely that you do at least something today.

Imagine it like this: you are playing a game, and the difficulty setting randomly switches every day. On some days it’s on easy and you get through five levels with no problems. On some days it’s on very difficult and you can’t even get to the first checkpoint. That’s okay. Say to yourself, “my abilities haven’t changed, the difficulty changed”. Today, just get to that checkpoint. Tomorrow you might get through five levels.

12) Learn from other autistic people

For any other problem you might come across, other autistic people are the best source of knowledge. Allistic parents, teachers, friends, mentors, etc are likely to not understand your problem at all, or give you bad advice. Instead consult the real autism experts - actually autistic people. There are plenty of us who got through school, college and/or uni. Reach out to them. They will help.

Good luck!

  1. Be aware of your surroundings. Bright lights and too much noise are hell for autistic people. Is there anywhere quiet or dim that you could take them to if they got stressed? Is there a way to lessen the noise and/or brightness?
  2. Don’t tell us to “stop acting weird”. Chewing on things, flapping our hands, rocking on our feet, and so on are all natural, healthy behaviours that help us to process emotion and sensory input. Telling us not to do them is akin to telling an allistic (non-autistic) person to stop smiling.
  3. Most autistic people are happy as we are. Some would rather not be autistic, it’s true, but most of us just want to be ourselves without shame or stigma. It’s generally bad manners to talk to us about a “cure” or “treatments” for who we are.
  4. Non-verbal communication – vocal sounds, text or written communication, sign language, etc – are all valid forms of communication which we sometimes have to use. (Or always have to use, in some cases.) Sometimes, we have to text the person sitting next to us because we can’t talk. Please don’t try to make us use our voices when we’d rather not!
  5. Research autistic groups before supporting them. What do actual autistic people say about this group? We like self-advocacy groups, we don’t like allistic people trying to talk for us. Not every group that claims to help autistic people is actually our friend!
  6. Special interests – things which autistic people fixate on and obsess over – are healthy and important. Don’t make fun of us for getting really into things, even if they’re “childish” things like Minecraft or Pokémon. It’s incredibly hurtful when someone we like just dismisses our interests without a second thought.
  7. When an autistic person is having a meltdown or shutdown, listen to them! Don’t fuss over them or get up in their face. Just listen to what they want you to do to help them, if anything. Let them write or text it, if they have to, and keep your voice down!
  8. We don’t process the world the same way you do. Sometimes things which seem obvious to you require explanation before we’ll understand them. Sometimes an explanation you understand will be one that makes no sense to us. Please be patient. We’re not being difficult on purpose! We want to understand, we really do.
  9. Be understanding when we say we can’t do something. Our energy gets used up a lot quicker than yours. Often we’d really like to do something, but we just can’t, and it can be difficult for us to explain that. Don’t guilt trip us for not going out or whatever – we already feel really bad about it!
  10. Listen to our boundaries. If we don’t want to be touched, don’t touch us. If we want you to leave our possessions alone, leave them alone. If we aren’t up to talking, don’t try to make us talk. We need boundaries a lot more than you do, so please try to respect them. It’s common courtesy!

[I originally posted this on Facebook, but I decided to post it here, too.]

Aaron "the most relaxing voice in the world" Tveit: Part 2
  • Aaron "the most relaxing voice in the world" Tveit: Part 2

Back a while I posted an audio a lot like this — all of Aaron’s most relaxing and pretty songs, edited down to just the calmest parts — because I’d seen a lot of people saying that Aaron has the most calming voice in the world and that his voice helps with anxiety a lot. So… here’s another version of this audio, except this time I added some reverb so it sounds like it’s in an empty concert hall, plus light rain background noise (and the songs are changed a little, updated, etc).

Basically if you’ve ever wanted to hear male siren Aaron Tveit sing a medley of gentle songs to you in an empty opera house while it’s raining outside, this audio is for you

i can’t focus on things for long. my brain doesn’t let me. if i need to focus, i need to move. my leg has to bounce, i need to fidget.

i can never finish what i started. tasks I start off excited about quickly get left behind in favour of new, more stimulating things.

i need to have a million things going on to feel satisfied. music and a book, a game and a movie, i have to have constant stimuli of every kind.

everything is a distraction. noise, lights, etc. even without physical distractions, my brain wanders off. i have to re-tune in to things, often after several minutes.

i never know when to shut up. i try, but it’s hard. and i always interrupt people. i hate waiting for turns, i need to be engaged constantly. listening to other’s is a struggle.

organizing is impossible. my room is always a mess, no matter how much i want to clean it. i lose everything constantly: my phone, my keys, my wallet, the remote, my pen. everything.

if i don’t like it, i can’t do it. even if i have to. if i like it, focusing is easier, but my attention still waivers.

some days are worse. some days, my brain is jumping from activity to activity. staying on tasks i usually enjoy wont happen. sitting still is impossible. when i can’t move or i feel bored, i get extremely frustrated and angry. everything in me wants to scream.

i always forget to do things i need to. notes and reminders don’t help. i have needed to pay my brighthouse bill for 2 months and i still haven’t.

i got so frustrated in class when i couldnt focus that i had to leave and i cried in the hallway. this isnt a first.

in elementary school, id read instead of paying attention in class because my books could hold my attention and didnt make me restless.

in middle school, i doodled instead of paying attention. i almost failed algebra because i couldn’t focus on the content. somehow i got a 5/5 on the exam.

i cried in the shower tonight because my brain doesn’t work.
this sucks.

Prompt 124

Soulmate AU where people can’t hear the sound of music until they’ve fallen in love. All other sounds can be heard but music cannot.

One day, Person A meets Person B; after multiple encounters with Person B, Person A begins to slowly hear some light noises hear and there. As their relationship (not necessarily romantic yet) with Person B progresses, Person A begins to hear all the sounds they never heard of before–and they love it.

Eventually, Person A can hear the full sound of music.

Bonus: Person A starts dancing to a song while with Person B. Person B stares on confusedly and asks A what they are doing.

“Dancing to this song.”

“What? I don’t hear anything…”

Let Person A’s heart shatter just a little bit.

X-Files Fic: Reminiscence, Chapter One

Timeline: Post-revival, but assuming that “My Struggle II” never happened.
Rating: PG, for language only.
Summary: This fic was prompted by an awesome video by the amazing @mulderswaterbed, which you can watch here.  Mulder wakes one morning to find that Scully has disappeared, and is told- by those he trusts- that she has been dead for over twenty years.  All of the evidence- and even Mulder’s own memories- seem to back it up.  But is it true?  Or can Mulder not trust anyone- himself included?

A quick note: Plenty of y’all are going to be SCREAMING at me when you finish this chapter, but please, stay with me!  I promise not to steer you wrong!

In his dreams, there are flashing lights, loud noises, the high, keening sound of the wind, and, he could swear, someone calling his name in a panic… though it could have just been more wind.  He wakes once, barely, just enough to register that it’s storming outside, raining instead of snowing because it’s been a warm winter.

When he wakes for the day, hours later, her side of the bed is cold, empty, the covers pulled up to the pillow and tightly tucked in.  He tries to think back to the conversation they’d had before bed- had she said anything about leaving early?  He could have sworn they’d decided to drive to work together today.  He retrieves his smartphone from the nightstand, but there are no new texts, no missed phone calls.  He rolls onto his back with a groan, staring up at the badly cracked ceiling that he’s been meaning to re-plaster for years.

He tells himself that maybe she’d discovered, upon waking, that she’d forgotten something important at her apartment back in DC, and she hadn’t wanted to wake him up when she’d realized she’d have to go home before heading to the Hoover building.  Or maybe she’d discovered that he’d run out of coffee earlier this week, and she’s making a quick Starbucks run so that she doesn’t have to begin the day sans caffeine.

Maybe she’s on her way back here, even now.

But when seven-thirty has come and gone, and Mulder has showered, shaved, and donned his suit for the day, and there’s still no sign of Scully, he has to conclude that, whatever the reason, she must have decided to leave the house before he’d woken up.

Without telling him.

Mulder tries to remember if there’s anything he might have said, at work or after, the previous evening, that could have offended her, could have made her decide to leave in the middle of the night… but, oddly enough, he’s having a hard time remembering anything that happened at work at all, and nothing from when they’d arrived back at the house.  He remembers her sitting across from him at the desk in their office, frowning down at something- a report?- and pushing a lock of long hair out of her face, rolling her eyes at something ridiculous he’d said.


Long hair?

He shakes his head sharply.  He must not be getting enough sleep, if his brain is this scrambled.

Keep reading


i was at the store looking at pokémon toys (as one does) and they had this bracelet thing that syncs to your 3ds and lights up and plays noises when you use a z move, and i was like THAT’S ACTUALLY RAD but the price tag was missing, so i looked it up with a barcode scanner and it was FIFTY FUCKING DOLLARS. THAT’S MORE THAN THE ACTUAL GAME. IT’S NOT EVEN THAT COOL OF A BRACELET, I CAN’T WEAR THIS SHIT OUTSIDE OF DESIGNATED AT-HOME POKÉTIMES. IT’S NOT EVEN A PEDOMETER. i am calling out this child’s toy, for children, for not meeting my grown-ass standards for the value of a toy.