Because I have #ColorInMotion on the horizon, I thought some nostalgia was in order✨

Pics from The Color Run, August 23, 2014. Possibly the worst morning of the whole year happened the day of this race. It changed the direction of my life. It could have been awful, but running two races after the very yucky uncomfortable day I had told me to put my energy where it was wanted, needed and welcomed.

That day was the first step toward letting go of what wasn’t working in my life and running toward what was.

#HappyIsAsHappyDoes #gratitude

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There are barely any pictures of me at my worst. Here on a hot summers day wrapped in layers actually just one week into entering recovery stood with Bobby looking lifeless and frail- my smile is so superficial, I hadn’t really got the energy to smile yet I was somehow able to walk miles each day and participate in a very active lifestyle. I use the word participate because that’s exactly what I did. I didn’t live, thrive, love or enjoy. I just existed, it was he’ll. My feet got rubbed raw just walking around because the bones pushed through the soles of my feet. I woke with bed sore pains after just one night because my hip bones stuck out so much that even sleeping because a painful task. Eating disorders are a living hell in whatever form they come in. I am now two and a half years from this moment and in that time I have battled to regain myself. Recovery is hard. I have fought so hard to rediscover the me that got so lost in the toxic swamp of my anorexia. Some days were good and some days, frankly- terrible- but even after slip ups I continued to push on because in reality anorexia=death and recovery=life and deep down I knew that. When I think of how far I have come I am so proud of myself. I can go out for meals with friends and family without panic and actually enjoy both the food and the experience. I can eat guilt free. I can think of other things than food. I can walk and talk and ride and love without a gremlin on my back. I still have a little way to go but I’m on my way to freedom. On my way to me and my future. Recovery is hard but oh so worth it. Life is good…. 

Monday was looooooong…. Turning my back on it and getting on with the week keeping my mind switched to what I’m grateful for instead of what sucks 💪🙏⚡️#positivity #lifeisgood #healthychoices #uk #walking #happiness #shakeitoff #blogger #motivation #strong #clouds #trees #england #countryside #instaclouds #nature #pretty #photooftheday #love #picoftheday #style #photo

This is what happens When someone says don’t worry I’ll make you whatever you want to me being friends with a chef has its perks and when the food is Organic… #LifeIsGood #

Sobriety is so nice

So I had 3 months of sobriety on Valentine’s Day. Im so very proud of where I am now compared to where I was before and if I can do it, to all of you people that think there is no hope for you.. there is hope. Start small and take it one day at a time and it can happen.

Life is good