life. personal. whatever

455 // And some random things

Bought another set of MK watch today, just because. Green is money lovies! You attract lots of good stuff with the things you believe. So make sure you have a good list of principles you follow and live day by day. Charot.

Went home last night around 4am by the way, and went out again today before lunch. Still at the office and got some wee bit amount of time in my hands to go online and reply to most of your messages. So yaaaay! But i’m super hungry by the way, and i missed lunch or breakfast at home because i was rushing to get out to meet this morning schedule i have.

Anyway, i’m about to meet a friend today but he’s still in the gym and i’ve got few free hours to dine with him but he’s taking too long so pucha siya bahala siya sa buhay niya. Hahaha. He’s my best friend by the way. So, what’s up?

Followup to this

Aether employees Vic and Kate!

@therapists: could u pls just aknowledge that mental illness actually exists and that I’m not being difficult just to annoy you and that it’s not a personal attack if my years long suffering isn’t cured after one session with you

like… I’m trying man and I know my behaviour isn’t always logical and that my patterns are unhealthy but I can’t just snap out of it because that’S NOT HOW BRAINS WORK

I actually feel kinda presentable today! (for once…)

How are you guys? <3 I’m seriously struggling to find motivation for school right now… I recently turned in my college applications so my current grades don’t really matter anymore (as long as I don’t completely fail HAHA)… After working my ass off for four years to get really high grades and test scores, I think I’m just feeling… done with high school now that college apps are over? I mean, I love learning a lot, but every day I feel like I’m stuck in this fish bowl? I am so looking forward to college… Hopefully my motivation for school will come back after this semester ends and second semester begins and my schedule changes! Which is in… two and a half weeks… what am I going to do in the meantime LAUGHS

9

1028 // Manila Staycation Day 18

Last night was soo lit that we only took a couple of photos when we were almost done. Meeting up with these two bat-shit crazy millennials was fun enough to spice up my Thursday night indeed.

From the dinner and craaaazy (yas, i mean rated SPG crazy) conversation i had with my baby girl @chescarriffic to random stories and silly rants of the tumblr hot papi @sikolohistang-baliw, i think they made my Manila staycation quite bearable. Hahaha. I’m so bummed that we only had quite a few hours to bond (aheem at Chesca hahaha—insertparentingissueshere lol) considering that Rigo travelled from Cubao to BGC (thanks paps, you’re the best) i would have liked it if we were able to stretched the night more so we can explore more spots and eat (always) lots of unhealthy food and drink (well only as for you two) lots of ice cold beers. Nevertheless, looking forward for more long trips with these two soon. I’m sad at aalis na ako tomorrow so our time to bond is quite constrained and the three of us have schedules to follow—like, ang hirap maging adults ano? Hahaha.

But you guys are so great and thank you for being real—and kinky, and crazy, and adorable and hella amazing. Looking forward for more nights like this, i hope the next time will be as walwal as how millennials (kunyare ako din) do it. And wala ng curfew, puhwleasse! Hahaha.

And for anyone wondering how they are in person, it’s way to early to say but how they are in their respective blogs is as quite as real as how they are when you talk to them in person of course less the other too personal dramas, samin na lang ‘yon. Walang arte. They say it as it is (and that’s what i really like), saka they know how to adjust ha considering i was their Ate, andon 'yong respect pero the boundaries of fun—the age didn’t get in the waaay, i’m glad. Lol. Buuut yes, still bummed of ending the fun way too early but hopeful for another set or a series of laughter and chikka and whatnot the next time i fly back to Manila. Let’s crossed our fingers for May and July.

Love you guiseee. Stay balbal but progressive.
xoxo

i love ships where the stoic person doesn’t change all that much when they fall in love. they’re still rather cold, they don’t think holding hands is necessary or efficient, things like that. i feel like there’s a lot of pressure for couples to seem super lovey and shit, but that fails to take into account people who just don’t show their affection that way. love isn’t defined by how obnoxious a couple is in public. 

9

LIFE LATELY: The random strange snaps of her day

I think it’s been awhile since i made another Life Lately series post, not that it’s any way different from my photo post and time posted series, nevertheless—let’s bear with this one and read on. Alright?

• Well it hasn’t been much really, if we have been talking for awhile you would know that i was never that busy unlike the times when i’m in Davao wherein i usually run errands from point A to point wherever. So i guess this trip is a littool bit mix of a short vacation and short business meetings. Now i have to make that an official statement. He he he.

• I’ve managed to met some of you here, that includes @beauinparanoia and @kwento-sa-likod-ng-sxlita and some other Anon bloggers who do not want to be named or pssh. You guys are still cool anyway. And i think i’ll be meeting Chesca (?) sooner or later because she made me stay just until her birthday. Huuy, special mention ka talaga @chescarriffic para wala ka ng kawala. Advance heypeey birthday babe! But i’m still open for some regular meet ups and let’s hang and be friends okay? I really want to get close to you guys and talk to me like how you normally do via online. Ohhh by the way i was able to meet up with @matabangutak last time—and tada! he gave me two of his books! I’m flattered and feel so special because he paid for the dinner too. Hahaha! Iba talaga ikaw Sir. Sorry now lang ako nakapag-blog about it, i was overwhelmed by the fact that he’s willing enough to give me his books with his message inside. Hahaha. Next time ulit? Uy, teka babawi talaga ako tapos treat ko naman Rhads! He he he. Bisitahin na natin ‘yong Marikina food grabs na sinasabi mo. *insertwinkingfacehere*

• Ooops, “Sa'yo” by Silent Sanctuary’s playing just now. And this song always always always gets into me. Hahaha. Bukod sa maganda siya, ang laki ng impact sakin ng kantang ‘to dahil sa ex ko at sa babae niya and some cute guy who sang this to me while intensely giving me the stare. Lol.

• I think it’s not rare to hear a lot on my stories that i have been on quite an escapade of eating alone anywhere. And some were good and some were just awfully bleaah. This place (in the series of photos i’ve posted above) was both an “aah” and “bleacck” moment for me. For one, they have good choices of food to be honest it’s just that i made a wrong move of going in because i happen not to notice that most of their specials were seafoods and you know how allergic i am with seafoods, i can fairly eat some but with the risk of you know getting so sick after and since i was out and alone and was just randomly going in some of the establishments around QC (irony of having bad eyesights, you have this tendency to be awkward to stay too long outside a resto because they might think otherwise so your awkward self chose to go in instead and sit down and bwaalaaa—you ended up regretting you did) and found this Chibog place and thought ‘twas cute and nice. Well it was, buuuut regretted ordering their Pork Sisig (‘twas fairly done) with plain rice at first then i ordered and tried their “Garlic Rice”. Nakanampucha bro, mas masarap pa ako magluto hayuup. Saka mamantikain punyeta diko naubos. Ended up paying Php 600 for that meal. So now you know why i regretted going in right? Hindi sulit ang Php 600 ko maaan. Pucha. Kaya madalas i settled for some boiled egg na lang sa unit eh. Hey, before you say anything else i was the one who boiled it alright? And it suits my liking because the yellow part is just so yellooow and such a softy so i like my eggs that way. Hahaha.

• Most of my free time were fairly spent at the rooftop, ogling on some scenic view—the skies, the lights, the hustle and bustle of the city life and some book reading time and listening to my playlist. Fxck! I haven’t posted any of my playlist just yet since November of last year ano? Hay kaloka. I’ll make sure to do that once i have more free time to go online and do some artsy posting (just like how i made my monthly playlist post—kindly check the sidebars bitches for some reference).

Alrighty. This has been long overdue but worthy of posting, if i must say. Because i hate stashing some of the photos on my album because it only clogs my memory more so. He he he. Did you guys finish reading this one or did you just automatically liked the heart button? Pssh. I hate that. I’m sorry, i cringe to the thought of that. I usually do long hours of back-reading the blogs of my favorite people here and i liked most of their post not only because s/he’s my favorite blogger but because of its content. And would i suck a little less if i say i expect the same treatment? Charot. Ang demanding. Hahaha. Nilubos ko na kasi di na ako makaka-online starting tomorrow at 7am and hindi niyo rin ako makokontak talaga until 7am of the next morning. Psssh why? Please read on and check my previous posts. He he he. See you and oh, have a wild and happy weekend you loveliesss!

Sorry i haven’t been making any original content on this blog, i am still drawing but it’s just mainly cartoon and furry stuff- i’ve hit a sort of road block where i feel like i’ve drawn all the g/t ideas i can while still keeping fairly original. There’s only so many ways to draw it it feels for me and…..eh.
It’s a hard thing to draw, it’s so frustrating to do tiny details on small characters!
So yeah, sorry there hasn’t been any fresh new g/t content from me- theres just so many close ups of hands or faces i can take drawing y'know?
Plus simple cartoony stuff and furry stuff is more fun and loose to draw, it’s happy and free and doesn’t mess up my weak ass wrist as much as the detail and perspective needed in a g/t drawing does!
Nothings changing, i’m still answering asks and if i do make any original g/t content i’ll post it- i’m not leaving or anything, don’t worry!

Also when i was younger it was like a huge thing in my life, now it’s honestly not- i don’t think about it often if at all really, and i don’t think thats a bad thing.
I have a habit of holding into interests and hobbies as if they are self-identifying things because i have a hard time defining or knowing who i am without them, but like….it really isn’t important at all, i’m just over compensating for my identity issues by holding onto things so tight lmao.

Eh i dunno what i’m getting at, nothings changing- i’m still here answering asks, it’s just G/t used to be a part of my identity and who i was and now like….. it ain’t.
I don’t feel the need to define myself by my hobbies anymore and i don’t feel the need to pretend like they’re real in anyway, but honestly i felt this half a year ago and i don’t think i ever mentioned it.
Like i said, nothings changing though- this is just a thought on why i haven’t really made any new, original g/t content lately.

208 // She’s a girl with huge appetite

I always like cheese on my burgers. Plain is boring. It’s dull. It’s awful. And eating is fun when you’re with someone you’re comfortable with. One of my best friend, Charlie, has been staying with me at the condo for 5days now and it’s just too bad that he’s leaving tomorrow and head to Davao first due to some scheduled meetings and personal errands. And i’ll be left alone again for the next 4days just until my flight back to my city. Can’t imagine how will i make the remaining days fun and not ordinary. Pfft.

And the eating season is here. I think all of the weight (?) and energy i’ve lost since my Manila staycation will be gained back this day onwards. Tss. Cheers to that.

  • Me as a kid: I don't understand why teenagers curse at their friends and call them mean names. I'll never do that to my friends.
  • Me now: Come on bitch, get in the damn car let's go get some motherfucking ice cream.

230 // Manila Staycation Day 14

I think it’s nice that despite of your flaws you still get to be yourself around people who are constantly rooting for you to become better as time passes. Your weaknesses and other life bullshits doesn’t bother them (well maybe for some moments) anymore and they accept you for who you are and not only for what you can offer. And that’s when you get to love yourself more—when people are acceptable enough and supportive with your daily choices.

Others opinion about you no longer bothers you to the point of doubting your capabilities and hurting yourself. It’s when you’ve gained confidence to know where you stand and take two steps back when your involvement isn’t much needed.

It takes a lot of experience and maturity to know that. And most often than not, it doesn’t mean you have to be book-smart or physically perfect to realize that one.

<3

As someone who occasionally scrolls through the Yandere Simulator tag for shits and gigs, I feel like there isn’t enough love for our Devpai, so I decided to make a quick post to remedy that. 

Please note: I understand that there are two sides to this fandom - the side that loves Alex, and the side that’s out for his blood. I’m proudly in the former category, and this post ISN’T an invitation for you to tell me everything the guy’s ever done that could be seen as wrong in his life. Whatever your personal opinion is, our Devpai works very hard, and without him, we wouldn’t have this awesome game. Also, this isn’t a complete list of why we’re lucky to have Yandere Dev so feel free to add on.

  • Call me crazy, but I feel like YanDev “has” to apologise too much. Very complicated and time consuming feature not ready on time? Apology. Latest video not uploaded yet because he was too busy working on the game? Apology. Newest build so much as ten seconds late? Apology. I find this sweet but also sad. It’s great that he cares about his fanbase so much, and wants to stick to his promises, but these things happen, and I like to think that at least most of the fandom can respect that. 
  • Dude works his ass off on the game, but still somehow finds time to implement things just to make us happy. Easter eggs, mission mode, you name it. Yandere Sim already has incredible replay value and it’s not even done yet. 
  • YanDev often goes through social media and acknowledges work done by fans of the game. He doesn’t need to, and could easily be forgiven for not bothering, given how insane his schedule is; but somehow he finds the time for it, and that’s pretty cool. He treats fanwork like the compliment it is and is appropriately kind about it. 
  • He’s not one of those developers who asks for input and then ignores it. You see it time and time again with people who ask others for their opinion, then disregard completely pet peeve right there. YanDev has his own view for the game and that should be respected, but whenever he puts out a poll or something, he always takes the results into account when deciding what to do next. It’s nice to be listened to.
  • He’s forever taking time to stop and acknowledge the rumours and controversy surrounding YanSim, and himself. It must be a total pain, but it’s very mature of him to do.
  • He referenced Jay in a stream (I think it was? The video was on YT), and anyone who also watches Kubz Scouts is OK in my book. Just saying.
  • I’m not going to pretend that he’s the most perfect human in the world because I don’t actually know him personally and therefore can’t make a judgement on what kind of human he is, but Alex is still our Devpai, and he’s still worked tirelessly to give us something very fun, so TL;DR:

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

“I must admit I’m disappointed,” I note.

He smiles without humour, because there are so many things to be disappointed about. “Why?”

“I changed myself for you. I thought I’d be stronger than that.”

“Love makes a fool of everyone,” he says dryly, before he sobers. “You’ll find yourself again.

"You’re strong enough to.”

—  Excerpt from a book I’ll never write #7 // lily rose.
3

1152 // Manila Staycation Day 10: This isn’t the stone age

I’ve been spending a lot of my free time listening to indie and some underground songs and just trying to sip through good fxcking music. I’ve been telling you guys since that i’m no fan of music these days. I mean, i rarely appreciate mainstream songs due to ahm explicit content. Charot. De, most are just trying to get high you know. Here’s a line with no sense, let’s put an upbeat tone to it and then let’s call it a goddamn song and make it a hit. Most if not all, and if i am not mistaken—lacks a lot of uggh soul. Anyway, to each his own right?

Also, i’ve not been tracking my day to day activities while i’m here in Manila. I am always good at starting blog series and thinking perplex ideas to liven this page a littoool but always have a hard time making it through because well—laziness syndrome and i’m usually forgetful so when an event happens a day or two prior to my blogging i have this high probability of not being able to remember detail per detail what’s happened. As you notice, i am mostly spontaneous with my posting. So whatever pops in my head and i want to share it to you my dear readers, i have to write it down or it will be just another story unheard. He he he.

Apparently, wasn’t able to meet some of you still because i’m trying to prepare myself for this upcoming 24hr closed door training this Sunday. So i’m trying to condition my mind and body for this because this is really hugeee, for me, at least. The training will commence around 7am on Sunday and will end same time the morning after. No sleep, no phones and probably will be spending most of our time brainstorming and draining our energies until we die. Jowk. But for real though, this is like a huge thing for us because not everyone can do this. Only 30-40 people including our batch on Sunday—for 6 freaking years—had the privilege to attend this one. And attendees are carefully selected so if you’re able to attend this one and go through this and pass the training sabi nga nila you are able to reach the highest mountain in this industry. Pfft. Wish me luck? And no i am not allowed to drink or party today and tomorrow because again, i need to prepare for this one and just rest—as per advised. I don’t want to enter the room either, shaking and thoughts all over the place you know. So for those who have been constantly inviting me for a drink or hang out, i can only do some of it after the training. I’ll be here until the 24th so… which reminds me i need to book a ticket now before the price goes up any higher.

Any who, i might be able to go online for a moment just before the training starts so i probably will reply to all of your messages and other shebangs the next day after. Alrighty? Pfft. This is the second time around that i tried to blog about my thoughts and the innernut’s jammed and forgot to do a select all-copy in case some glitch will happen and ugggh forgot about it and then what do you expect a glitch happened due to slow innernut connection so yeah—what.a.total.bum. Seriously. I forgot some of the things i was blabbing about awhile ago. Fxck me.