life-update

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HEY TAYLOR💗 today has been an AMAZING day.

I just found out the results for my exams that I’ve been working for over the last year and I’m so happy to say my work has paid off and I was able to get STRAIGHT As???!!!!!😭😭 I just want to say that you helped me through everything from studying to the actual exams and when I was struggling, you taught me to never give in and today I’m so glad I never!! A few years ago I was barely holding on and I can’t believe how far I’ve come since then and I honestly could never have done it without you. There are not enough words to explain how grateful I am to have you in my life and as my idol. Thank you for everything, hopefully one day I’ll tell you just how much you mean to me in person.

I love you I love you I love you.

Abbie x @taylorswift

Last night I parked down a dark country road and watched the meteor shower by myself. I had such a nice night, I wasn’t lonely, there was no guy I was missing or wishing could be there with me. I was perfectly fine just laying there by myself, looking at the stars, thinking about life. I wanna make it very clear that I’m not glorifying eternal singleness. If that’s what you’re after then go for it but personally I would be sad to be on my own for the rest of my life. I believe humans need each other and that emotional connection is the fuel of a meaningful life.
But where I’m at right now, I’m staying connected with my friends and family. I’m helping people through what I do and the message I share in my career. I’m not desperate, I’m not sad, I’m not waiting around for someone to come make my life enjoyable. I LOVE my life the way it is. I guess now that I’m closer to 25 and my brain is almost fully developed I can just feel myself becoming more responsible with my choices.
It used to be that if I was attracted to someone I HAD to talk to them. It didn’t matter if I knew it was a bad idea, I couldn’t help myself. I’ve grown up so much in the last year and a half since I really started dating and let myself go down that road finally. I woke up and realized that yeah, if someone is blowing you off they’re probably just gonna keep blowing you off. If someone’s not giving you their time, they probably don’t really wanna be with you. If someone is putting in minimal effort, they’re probably not serious about you. I always wanted to be able to change people or “figure them out” and just say and do the right things and then hoped that somehow I could make them come around. I’m so done being that control freak. I can’t change anyone. I can accept people for who they are but I don’t have to let things drag on when they start to get stupid.
Things don’t feel like the end of the world anymore, I don’t feel like I’m gonna die alone and I’m finally starting to appreciate myself. I know I’m a catch. I know I’m a good person. I know I’m not some worthless lowlife who’s too crazy for anyone to love (literally how I used to see myself HAHA). I know I have a ton of good traits and a fascinating mind and a lovable personality, along with plenty of flaws that someone else will learn to accept as I learn to accept theirs in return.
I’m just at a place where I’m good. I don’t have a huge void to fill. If I don’t enjoy hanging out with someone more than I do spending time with myself, I’m out. I can take myself to the movies, I can look for shooting stars alone, I can take care of things just fine on my own. I have great friends and an incredible family and I don’t need someone else coming along and screwing up my life just so I can feel the “magic” of being jerked around and mislead for a month or two. That’s not worth my time anymore.
I’m looking for stability, dependability, loyalty and someone who’s actually serious about me. Someone who is going to for real take the time to get to know me and THEN decide if they want to date me.
I’m so sick of guys blowing me up cuz they think I’m cute and then peacing out once we actually start to get close. I used to take that so hard and think there was something wrong with me, like “once people get to know me they just leave 😪😪😪”. No Lisa, that’s called people who never wanted to know you, or anyone else for that matter, and can’t handle being close with other people in general. The only way I was the problem in that situation was the fact that I let them move in way too fast and act like a crazy person and take up so much of my time without ever even trying to be my friend. I’m finally over that game.
So yeah, that’s where I’m at right now! Haha I’m realizing the error of my ways, I’m feeling good about myself and I’m PERFECTLY fine enjoying my life on my own. If a real opportunity presents itself to get to know an amazing guy in a good situation, I will gladly take it. In the meantime I have an amazing opportunity to get to know myself and I am enjoying every second :)

Final exam done, I’m officially graduated!

this is a page from my journal featuring all the highlights of that day. I know nothing about snow, the last time it snowed in my country was like 15 years ago! so when I arrived to my college that is really near to the Andes mountains, everything was covered in snow and ice, the street was very slippery and I had a really painful fall but then everything went great! from now on I’ll be able to post content more often here and patreon and I’m really happy about that! Thank you guys for all your support during these last weeks ❤

Artsy things in exchange for health fund donations ^_^

First of all, thank you for your help so far! ^_^ I’m blown away by your well-wishes and financial help. Thank you, thank you. You’re the bestesttt! :D

So here’s the update: I was able to get the scan I needed yesterday, and now we have more information about the mass in my lower abdomen. Apparently there is a mass on my ovary. It is big enough (approx 5cmx4cmx3cm) to be touching my uterus. Here is my shitty drawing of the initial result of the CT scan:

Will post the official results when I get them (within 24 hours). But what we know so far is that the mass is twisting and untwisting, choking the ovary and nudging the uterus.

The OBs projected that the official results would  that mass be surgically removed. So yasss imma need financial help for my future operation. The private hospital quoted $2000-$4000 for the operation (excluding doctor’s fee and meds), but we’re looking into cheaper options in public hospitals (which are not actually completely free).

If you donate $5 or more to my PayPal, I will make an artsy thing for you. You can choose from any of these:

  • Calligraphy a quote of your choice (max 10 words)
  • Draw a thing like this  or this or this for you
  • Write you an astrology reading or a 50-word story

My PayPal is erisheidi@gmail.com, and any help is appreciated! Once you donate, just send a screenshot of your transaction and your artsy thing of choice. Also send your url on tumblr or ig so I can give you a shoutout! :)

I would like to stress that, NO, you’re NOT required to donate. Just keeping me in your thoughts is enough. If  you believe in a god, can you please say a prayer for me too? 

Pls pls pls signal boost! :) Thank you! Maraming salamat! :)

Just another life update.

So I officially no longer work at that awful company! My last day was Friday, and man, does it feel good. I’m feeling so much better in general. I didn’t realize what all that anxiety and stress was doing to my body.

I’m going to be staying home with my twins for the foreseeable future. Not sure if that will be the case forever, but we’ll see. For now, I’m just grateful for the opportunity to spend more time with them while they’re still little.

And that means I should also be online more now! Writing, blogging, etc. I’ve missed you guys!

And I’m really happy.

Current Mood:

Its been nothing but positive experiences ever since I moved out into my new place several months ago and I couldn’t be happier. I also just finished my certification process, so now I have a fancy piece of paper that lets me work at a professional level in my career and get more money to buy more cute things. 

I’m also really pleased my art and OCs are getting so much love lately! As always, thank you all for the overwhelming support~

An appropriately happy Domino brought to you by @mightyworld

Just to update you guys on what’s going on with me, things got a lot worse after my last update. But then as of today, they got a lot better. :)

I’m giving my two week notice at work tomorrow, and I feel very relieved and grateful.

I should be back to blogging and writing again soon. Just need a little more time to rest and breathe.

Love you guys. ❤️ Thank you so much for being patient with me.

So I’m done with my summer class as of today. I pray that I get a decent grade. 😐 Anyways, I’ll be super active for the next month. I’ll be trying to pump out plenty of artwork and maybe some comics? I have a lot ideas on the back burner…

ATM, I’ll be less active on IG, but will be lurking on Twitter. Which you can follow me @dettezzz. Hmu, I want to make friends. Oh, and I’ll be prepping to table at a local con with @superashie! I hope it’ll be a positive experience. 😅

Just a little life update because i haven’t posted in weeks and there are reasons for that:
🍌i have exams right now and just wrote my first one on saturday which was terrible. I was well prepared but then the exam wasn’t how everyone expected it to be sooo everyone failed at it. My next exam is coming up in ~ a week
🍌my hand is still (3 month already) injured and i’m still not able to use it properly (which means no weight lifting except of some leg exercises, cardio and Abs and not being able to work)
🍌i got a new tattoo which means i had to take off ~10 days from sports and then i got sick and had exams coming up so i ended up taking a break for around 2 weeks
🍌lately i’m really lazy to take food pictures which means i don’t really have anything to Post but if you are intrested in Personal stuff you can follow my personal instagram Account knfxyz
🍌holidays are coming up in a few weeks and I will go to Portugal with my boyfriend and to new York with lissi which i am SO excited for 🎉
🍌all in all i’m just a little bit too much into life at the moment to care about my Blogs which is the reason for the lack of posts at the moment. I’m sorry! ❤
🍌i hope everyone else is doing fine ✨

so yesterday I was kinda feeling myself, even though my hair was a mess

life update
I really want to stop overeating at night, I don’t even know why I’m doing it but I really want/need to stop as the only thing it’s doing is making me feel sluggish at night.
I’ve gotten more into running again and been replacing other workouts with runs. I really want to start increasing my distance now, as I never really run more than 7km.
All in all, life is pretty good, one more week of work left before I’m heading to Sweden to backpack/bike for 10 days!

so…A lot of things have been happening in my personal life and, even though I will do my best to stay strong, I will be on a hiatus for a while, am not sure when all be posting more frequent but you will see art every now and then.. 

sorry for the hiatus..

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self portraits gonna ramble on a bit.. might be kind of oversharing but thats fine in this case 

 i deferred from uni the other week, made it through 2 days of class and realised my grades werent good enough last semester to hold up my scholarship, so i lost that. had a big cry but ultimately felt better since the scholarship was what i felt locked me in to the course i was doing (communication design). had a think about it and i really just came to my senses and realised i wasnt enjoying it like i had expected to coming out of vce. so i deferred +was unsure about if it wasnt the right decision but my gut feeling told me that it was. 

 a week later i feel so much better! im working heaps of hours but i enjoy my job, and ive gone back to the gym because i have time! 

ive been at a huge stand still with my art for the past couple of months. whether it was the winter or my wrist being injured every other week, or being overworked and too tired to commit to art, i dont know. but every time i sat down to draw and committed myself to it i felt like crying, because it never turned out how i wanted it to

while im rambling a lot, i know, the point is that ive been placing so many expectations on myself that theyve piled up on me and made me anxious to even do something outside of perfection, which no one is really capable of doing.

im taking time for myself to recover from the stress, im letting myself do what i wanted to do with no heavy expectation to succeed at the highest level of my abilities every single time.

i want to take this time for myself to let myself grow, thrive and create in a stress free environment. i want to make whatever and think, okay thats that! if its good or bad it doesnt matter, ive accomplished this and thats better than doing nothing! 

i know that doing this will better my creativity and my mental health, and i need that. but im not going to be lazy, im just going to stop being so hard on myself and start being more gentle :)

thats it! p.s. im also growing out my hair 😄

Life Update

Hey guys! So we noticed we were like super quiet this last weekend. We decided to give ourselves a little break and take a weekend for ourselves. Tanu played Fall Out 4 all weekend and Chinchi got some drawing time in. So you don’t think we’ve fallen off the face of the planet we’ll give you beautiful potatoes a little life update.

Well our Conventions have come to a slow down point. The next one that is planned will be Ikkicon here in Austin, TX in December. While we want to plan for Onicon and Anime North Texas, we just aren’t sure if it’ll be in the budget since we are trying to save up for some longer trips next year.

Right now we are waiting for our Cosplay Voting to end tomorrow and then will tally up the votes for the top 5, and then hold another poll. We are still also on the look out for the Cosplay Contest Entries for our 50K celebration. We can’t wait to see more so throw them at us!

While that is going on we are trying to finish up CodeRunners’ Stories. We are just about done with the scripts. We are also rehashing 2TallTales, for those of you that have been waiting on that story for so long.

For cosplay making plans, other than the vote, we are actually going to refurbish a lot of our Cosplays so that they are sure to live long lives. 
Speaking of Cosplay. We noticed we have a lot of raw footage we never went through… so… I guess we’ll go through that one weekend and see if there is anything good.

Life updates! My front camera is broken at the moment so selfies have been put on hold for a minute, I’m getting new glasses tho!!! I’m also just about to start working so the front camera thing will work itself out vvv soon, stay tuned.