life is so easy!

Sometimes shit happens.

I have a friend going through a rough time right now, and her main question is “Why?”

“Why didn’t I see this coming?”

“Why did this happen?”

“Why am I not getting this?”

The most frustrating thing about life is that sometimes, there isn’t an answer. It’s so easy to drive yourself crazy looking for the moment where it all turned or where it all went wrong, but most of the time, it’s not there.

I know it’s easier said than done, but you have to let you go. I’m one of those people that hangs onto stuff for way longer than I should and it’s always ME that ends up hurt by it, not other people. 

Go ahead and let yourself be upset. Get some ice cream and cry. It’s okay to be upset! But eventually, you need to look at it, try and find something you can learn from it, and then move on.

There’s something we can learn from every bad experience, and a lot of times it’s about yourself. Take this moment to appreciate yourself and your self growth.

It’ll all be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, then it’s not the end.

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IN MEMORY OF CHARLES MANSON (1934-2017)
Rest in peace, Charles.

Today is a sad day for the True Crime community. It saddens me to say that Charles Manson has passed away. He was a great musician and composer. But Charles will remain alive in our memory as long as we remember him. He did not have an easy life, so I hope he has a better life wherever he is. Rest in peace. I’ve made a video as a tribute, it’s the least I can do for him.

  • Any student EVER: How can I improve my grade in this, your class about writing essays?
  • Me, the frustrated teacher: WRITE BETTER ESSAYS!!1!

There is a possibility this blog may not continue. 
Asks have been opened only for tonight.
Go ahead.
vvv See tags for more details if you want.

When you lose someone to suicide it hurts so much more for the simple fact that you really just have to accept that no matter what you could’ve said, no matter how much help they were getting it wasn’t enough. Nothing in this life is easy so people who get up everyday and tackle this shit head on are fucking warriors. It’s just so important to let the people in your life know how much you love and appreciate them because they may not be feeling it at all. They may see themselves as burdens or worthless, never leave a situation with regrets because the last words, last memory, last moment you spent with that person sticks with you and if it was on a bad note it dead haunts you.

We all have our own lives especially as we get older and enter relationships, build families, move away but just always remember to reach out at some point, because I’d give anything to go back to a good 7 months ago and literally hear one last obnoxious laugh, hear one more joke, get one last lecture, argue one last time about how disgusting a can of spam is.

These memories don’t live like people do, memories fade so treasure their presence while you can.

anonymous asked:

not to be like this but whats your favorite jallad (jonghyun ballad) mine is diphylleia grayi. he taught me to stop being a ballad hater honestly

STOP this is really the hardest question you could’ve asked me 😣……. i love your choice it’s such an unreal song i remember having chills from head to toe when i first heard it! so let me categorize this because i literally can’t choose one and even with multiple songs this is Not easy so: elevator (song of my life. if i believed in soulmate stuff this would’ve convinced me jonghyun and i are actual soulmates. he just Knows like he gets it? how does he exactly Get it), our season (this song is my happiest place i just feel so content and calm listening to it i really can’t describe how much i love it. think warm bed after a long day of being out in the winter. yeah), hallelujah (CHILLS every single time! every time. The Song™ that got me into jonghyun’s music. i remember listening to it all day and thinking to myself how is this man real) WOW this got long i’m so sorry jdjshkd

i keep trying to memorize every detail of the moments i live in. in the soreness of my legs from standing so long at a concert, the chill of the night, the patterns of a tablecloth, the oily texture in my mouth after eating fried bananas. i keep trying to memorize the feelings, the quiet contentedness, the laughter, the excitement. i keep trying to memorize the people, their smiles, the way they speak, what makes them laugh. i’m constantly on the cusp of the next part of my life and that’s just so.. strange. but it makes it so much easier to find happiness no matter what’s happening to me, in a way? because i’m already kind of looking at life with those rose-colored glasses of nostalgia, simply because i know these are times i’ll never be able to live again, and these are people i might not always have, and that makes it so much easier to appreciate everything i might miss later. 

If You’re Too Busy For These 5 Things: Your Life Is More Off-Course Than You Think

Originally posted by teapotsandroses

Despite turbulence and other conditions keeping airplanes off-course 90 percent of flight time, most flights arrive in the correct destination at the intended time.

The reason for this phenomenon is quite simple — through air traffic control and the inertial guidance system, pilots are constantly course correcting. When immediately addressed, these course corrections are not hard to manage. When these course corrections don’t regularly happen, catastrophe can result.
For example, in 1979, a passenger jet with 257 people on board left New Zealand for a sight seeing flight to Antarctica and back. However, the pilots were unaware that someone had altered the flight coordinates by a measly two degrees, putting them 28 miles east of where they assumed to be.

Approaching Antarctica, the pilots descended to give the passengers a view of the brilliant landscapes. Sadly, the incorrect coordinates had placed them directly in the path of the active volcano, Mount Erebus.

The snow on the volcano blended with the clouds above, deceiving the pilots into thinking they were flying above flat ground. When the instruments sounded a warning of the quickly rising ground, it was too late. The plane crashed into the volcano killing everyone on board.

An error of only a few degrees brought about an enormous tragedy.

Small things — if not corrected — become big things, always.

This flight is an analogy of our lives. Even seemingly inconsequential aspects of our lives can create ripples and waves of consequence — for better or worse.

How are you piloting your life?

What feedback are you receiving to correct your course?

How often do you check your guidance system? Do you even have a guidance system?

Where is your destination?

When are you going to get there?

Are you currently off-course? How long have you been off-course?

How would you know if you are on the right course?

How can you minimize the turbulence and other conditions distracting your path?



1. Organizing Your Life

I don’t think I’m alone in being slightly scattered and sloppy about certain areas of my life.

Life is busy.

It’s hard to keep everything organized and tidy. And maybe you don’t want to have an organized life. But moving forward will require far less energy if you remove the excessive baggage and tension. Everything in your life is energy. If you’re carrying too much — physical or emotional — your progress will be hampered.

In his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey explains that some things are important, and some things are urgent. Most people spend their life prioritizing urgent and “shallow” activity (e.g., answering emails, putting out proverbial fires, and just day-to-day stuff).

Very few people have organized their lives to prioritize almost exclusively important and “deep” activity (e.g., learning, health, relationships, travel, and goals).

No one cares about your success more than you do. If you’re not a meticulous accountant about the important details of your life, then you aren’t responsible enough to have what you say you want.



So how do you organize your life?

Environmental Energy

  • Is your living space cluttered and messy or simple and neat?
  • Do you keep stuff (like clothes) you no longer use?
  • If you have a car, is it clean or just another place to keep your clutter and garbage?
  • Does your environment facilitate the emotions you consistently want to experience?
  • Does your environment drain or improve your energy?



Financial Energy

  • Do you have unnecessary debt?
  • Do you know how many dollars you spend each month?
  • Do you know how many dollars you make each month?
  • Are you making as much money as you’d like to be?
  • What’s holding you back from creating more value in other people’s lives?
  • Most people don’t track their expenses. But if they did, they’d be shocked how much money they waste on stuff like eating out.
  • I’ll be honest, as a creative and right-brained person, administrative and logistical details bog me down. I procrastinate and avoid them. But this lackluster behavior is holding me back from the very goals I’m trying to accomplish.
  • Until I can hone in on my finances, I won’t have a healthier financial life, regardless of my income. Until I take complete responsibility of my finances, I’ll always be a slave to money.
  • And so will you.


Relational Energy

  • Are your relationships the most meaningful and enjoyable part of your life?
  • Do you spend enough time nurturing the relationships that really matter?
  • Do you maintain toxic relationships that no longer serve you?
  • Are you authentic and honest in your relationships?
  • Like money, most people’s relationships are not organized in a conscious manner. But with something so critical, we should take better stock of our relationships.


Health Energy

  • Do you eat with the end in mind?
  • Are you conscious of and in control of the foods you put in your body?
  • Does the food you eat improve or worsen the other areas of your life?
  • Does your body reflect your highest ideals?
  • Is your body as strong and fit as you want it to be?
  • Are you healthier now than you were three months ago?
  • Health is wealth. If you’re bed ridden, who cares how organized the other areas of your life are? It’s so easy to put our health on the side, such as foregoing sleep, over consuming stimulants, and making poor eating habits.
  • Little things become big things. And eventually everything catches up.


Spiritual Energy

  • Do you have a sense of purpose in life?
  • Have you come to terms with life and death in a way you resonate with?
  • How much power do you have in designing your future?
  • Death, it turns out, is not your greatest fear. Actually, your greatest fear is reaching death and having never truly lived.
  • When you organize your spiritual life, you become clear on what your life is about. You become clear on what you stand for, and how you want to spend each day. You develop conviction for what really matters to you, and what is a “distraction.”
  • No matter how well defined, everyone has a moral system governing their behavior. Most people believe in being honest and good people. But until you organize your spiritual life, you’ll experience internal conflict when acting contrary to your values and vision.


Time

  • How much of your time do you feel in complete control of?
  • Is your time being wasted on things you don’t intrinsically enjoy?
  • Are the activities you spend your time doing moving you toward your ideal future?
  • Are you spending most of your time furthering your own agenda or someone else’s?
  • What activities should you remove from your life?
  • How much time do you waste each day?
  • What would your ideal day look like?
  • What activities could you outsource or automate that take up your time?
  • Until you organize your time, it will disappear and move quickly. Before you know it, you’ll wonder where all the time went.
  • Once you organize your time, it will slow down. You’ll be able to live more presently. You’ll be able to experience time as you want to. You’ll control your time rather than the other way around.


Stop What You’re Doing and Get Organized

Getting organized and conscious of your present circumstances (e.g., your environment, finances, relationships, purpose, and time) puts you in a position to build toward the future you want.

The fastest way to move forward in life is not doing more. It starts with stopping the behaviors holding you back.

If you want to get in shape, you’ll make more progress by stopping your negative behaviors than starting good ones. So, before you start exercising, purge the junk food from your diet. Until you stop the damage, you’ll always be taking one step forward and one step backward.

Before you focus on making more money, reduce your spending. Detach yourself from needing more and become content with what you have. Until you do this, it doesn’t matter how much money you make. You’ll always spend what you have (or more).

This is a matter of stewardship. Rather than wanting more, more, more , it’s key to take proper care of what you currently have. Organize yourself. Dial it in. Your life is a garden. What good is planting if you don’t prepare the soil and remove the weeds?

Why do most people stay stuck? They never organize. They try adding more, or being more productive, or taking a different approach. So before you “hustle,” get organized.



2. Plan And Invest In Your Future


“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” — Chinese Proverb


Taking these foundational areas of life and organizing them is essential to creating your ideal future.

Very few people consciously plan and design their life. It’s actually startling how few Americans are investing in their future. Most Millennials are terrified of the stock market and long-term investing. Most Baby Boomers never developed the discipline to invest, but instead maintained an addiction to American consumption.

Even still, you have complete power over the details of your life the moment you decide you’re worthy of that power. That decision is manifest in tangible behaviors, like fixing or removing troubled relationships and saying “no” to activities that are nothing more than a waste of your time.

You get to decide right now.

“If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail!” — Benjamin Franklin

Your vision should be based on your why, not so much your what.

Your why is your reason, your what is how that is manifest. And your “what” can happen in a ton of different ways. For example, my why is to help people get clarity on the life they want to live, and to help them achieve their goals as quickly as possible. My what could be blogging, parenting, being a student, going out to dinner, and several other things.

Too many people think creating a vision is about nailing down exactly what they want in the next 20 years. The problem with this mega long-term approach to goal setting is that it actually slows your potential.

Instead of having a pre-set plan of what he wants to do, Tim Ferriss executes on 3–6 month experiments that he’s currently excited about. He told Darren Hardy in an interview that he has no clue what the outcome of his experiments might be. So there’s no point in making long-term plans. He has no clue what doors will open up, and he wants to be open to the best possibilities.

But his why doesn’t change.

When you are proactively creating and collaborating with many different people, the whole becomes different and better than the sum of its parts. This is why you can’t plan for everything. Because at the highest level, you’ve transcended your need to have things exactly how you want them. You know that with the help of other people, you can do things 10X, 100X, or 1,000X bigger and better than you could ever conceive on your own.

Rather than expecting a particular outcome, you are completely confident that the best outcome will ensue. This is how you create and contribute beyond anything you could ever comprehend. Collaboration and synergy lead to new innovations and ultimately, human evolution. It’s how the old and outdated rules are redefined and replaced with new and better ones, thus changing the global environment.

Invest in Your Future

When you choose to forego momentary gratification in order to have an enhanced future, you are investing in your future. Most people fail to do this successfully.

Most people don’t purposefully invest in their finances, relationships, health, and time. But when you invest in yourself (and your future),you ensure your future present moments will continue to get richer and more enjoyable.

Thus, your life will continue getting better and more in line with your ideal vision.



3. Tracking Important Metrics


“When performance is measured, performance improves. When performance is measured and reported, the rate of improvement accelerates. ”

— Thomas Monson


Getting organized and investing in your future are futile if you’re not tracking. In regards to the most important areas of your life, you need to be on top of what’s going on.

Tracking is difficult. If you’ve tried it before, chances are, you quit within a few days.

Research has repeatedly found that when behavior is tracked and evaluated, it improves drastically.

If you’re not tracking the key areas of your life, than you’re probably more off-course than you think. If you were to be honest with yourself, you’d be stunned how out-of-control things have become. As J.M. Barrie, author of Peter Pan, has said:

“The life of every man is a diary in which he means to write one story, and writes another; and his humblest hour is when he compares the volume as it is with what he vowed to make it.”

The cool part is, once you get organized, make a plan, and start tracking, desired change happens quickly.

Track the things that are closely related to your core priorities. As Jim Collins said in Good to Great, 

“If you have more than three priorities you have none.”

Your priorities reflect your why, and thus, your life should be build around your priorities. Not the other way around. Consequently, if you’re serious about improving upon the foundation of your life, track your priorities. 

For example:

Your key relationships

Your finances

Self improvement (such as health or how you use your time)

You can track whatever priorities you have. But I can absolutely promise you that once you do, your conscious awareness of these things will increase. You’re ability to control these things will enhance. Your confidence will wax strong. And your life will become simpler.

You’ll be living a simple, yet organized and refined life. You’ll be responsible, which put another way is freedom.



4. Prayer and Meditation To Reduce Noise

“I have so much to do today that I’m going to need to spend three hours in prayer in order to be able to get it all done.” — Martin Luther

There’s a lot of emphasis on hustle these days.

Hustle, hustle, hustle.

But all the hustle in the wrong direction isn’t going to help you. Yes, by hustling you can fail often, fail fast, and fail forward. However, as Thomas Merton has said:

“People may spend their whole lives climbing the ladder of success only to find, once they reach the top, that the ladder is leaning against the wrong wall.”

This happens way too often. We get caught in the thick of thin things. Far too late do we realize that in our mad rush, we were pursuing someone else’s goals instead of our own.

But spending a large chuck of time in prayer and/or meditation does more than provide clarity to what you’re doing. These things open your mind up to possibilities you can’t get while busy.

For example, a few days ago I spent the entire morning praying, thinking deeply, listening to inspirational music, and writing in my journal. A few hours into this process, an idea came to me that is absolute gold.

I also got insights regarding important relationships during that time, which when those insights came in, I immediately sent out emails or texts to those people. Amazing collaborations and mentorships were the resultant outcome.

But there’s more.

Your thoughts are incredibly powerful. They actually govern not only you but those around you. Think about it, if you think positively about the people you’re around, their lives are better. This is why people “send positive energy” or pray for other people. It actually makes a difference.

Your thoughts create endless ripples — even waves — of consequence all around you.

While praying and/or meditating for a large portion of time, the level of your thoughts will elevate. And interesting things will begin happening. If you’re uncomfortable with the idea of miracles, you can think of it as luck.

Whatever you call it, when you spend large portions of time every day in deep reflection mode, luck strikes. Stuff happens that is completely outside of your control for your benefit.

For instance, during my deep dive into my mind and soul, one of my favorite authors came across my blog. He re-tweeted one of my articles and reached out to me. Now we’re friends. We’ve spent lots of time together. He’s helped me get a book contract. He’s even had me speak at one of his events!

If you’re skeptical of these ideas. Give it a try. Why do you think the majority of the world’s most successful have rituals such as these? There is a higher realm you can tap into that unlocks limitless possibilities.

The only thing holding you back from those things is your mind.



5. Move Toward Your Goals Every Single Day

How many days go by where you did nothing to move toward your big goals?

Probably too many.

Life is busy.

If you don’t purposefully carve time out every day to progress and improve, then without question, your time will get lost in the vacuum of our increasingly crowded lives. Before you know it, you’ll be old and withered, wondering where all that time went.

As Harold Hill has said: 

“You pile up enough tomorrows, and you’ll find you are left with nothing but a lot of empty yesterdays.”

After you’ve gotten yourself organized, made plans, started tracking, and gotten into the habit of prayer/meditation, taking action and hustling will be automatic. You’ll be focused on the right thing and in the right frame of mind to actually execute.

Its good practice to do these kind of things at the beginning of your day before your will power depletes.

If you don’t, it simply will not get done. By the end of your day, you’ll be exhausted. You’ll be fried. There will be a million reasons to just start tomorrow. And you will start tomorrow — which is never.

So your mantra becomes: 

The worst comes first. Do that thing you’ve been needing to do. Then do it again tomorrow.

If you take just one step toward your big goals every day, you’ll realize those goals weren’t really far away.



Conclusion

It’s really easy to get off course in life. Like airplanes, we constantly need to make course corrections.

But we can ensure we get where we want in life by organizing ourselves, planning for our future, tracking our progress, heightening our mindset, and hustling.

Do this long enough and you’ll be shocked.

Go!

9

make me choose 
↳ achillesishot asked: it’s always sunny or arrested development?

“Writing a book is so easy” - Volume 3

Read the original viral sensation: Writing a book is so easy
The somewhat sensational sequel: Writing a book is so easy - the Sequel

Now, prepare for the third volume, the most in-depth behind-the-scenes of writing books yet…



Every book that you read has a story to tell. Not just the one in the pages, but so too the behind-the-scenes hell.

I documented what writing a book looks like from Day 1 to Release Day. The work never ends. You write wherever and whenever you can.

And when I say write, I mean, you have to WRITE

Like….DON’T STOP.

Here’s a secret: the more you write, the longer the book gets!

Sometimes you’re gonna be absolutely STUMPED. Like the entire universe is just being petty and conspiring against you.

When all else fails, drink coffee. Worship coffee. Sacrifice your first-born child to coffee.

Sometimes you’ll show up at your regular writing spot AND SOMEONE WILL HAVE STOLEN YOUR SEAT, THE STUPID, FAT HOBBITSEES

So you’re forced to write out of your element, totally distracted as you figure out ways to make it look like an accident…

And remember how your teachers always said you’d need to use math everywhere in life? Well, they weren’t wrong…

Every day, you persist. Inching closer. And closer. Every word pushing the story toward its close.

It might take a week, or a month or two or three, but every time you add another 10k, you can’t help but feel a swell of pride.

There will always be the days you miss writing, but that’s absolutely okay! Don’t beat yourself up! You can make time for it. Writing is art, and art takes time, and shouldn’t be rushed.

And one day you’ll sit down and stare at your screen and realize….the end is near. You can feel you’re closing in on those final words, those last sentences with the characters you’ve spent the past year with.

When you write those last words, a wave of relief will slam into you. You might shed some tears, because writing a book is difficult, and finishing the first draft is an incredible feat to achieve. Treat yo self. You deserve it.

Then…..take a break. Take as long a break as you need. Some people might need a month, some a year. Whatever your rhythm is, find it, stick to it, and never give it up.

No matter if you edit by hand or by computer, print out that first draft. Hold it in your hands, feel the weight of the words you wrote. The words that were stuck in your head for months, even years. Flip through those pages and look at what YOU created.

Then, when the time is right, edit that book.

Maybe you’ll finish editing a chapter in a day. Maybe it’ll take a week. For me, it’s usually an hour per page! Edit at your own pace. It’s not a race!

And then…..voila. You’ve edited the first draft!…….

If you have other books out, don’t let them fall to the wayside! Keep marketing, keep telling people about them (and showing them your work on the newest one!!), and get book signings and events whenever you can! Bookstores are ALWAYS looking for authors to feature. Just ask!

And of course, make it fun for yourself, too! Book flare and merchandise? Um, YES PLEASE.

Aaaaaaaaaaand now you need to focus again, and, you know, actually put all those edits in. Which usually turns into an entirely new round of editing in-and-of itself.

Keep putting those edits in….

And more, and more, and more edits…

Did I mention sometimes you’ll need to go to extreme lengths to fit in writing days?

Although art itself is so, so, so rewarding, we’re all still human. Some days will be more difficult than others. Some days, your mind will weigh you down. These can be the hardest days, but push through. Find an anchor and hold tight and take care of yourself.

Other times, you’ll be traveling! Take your writing with you. I find that when I’m on vacation, I’m a much more productive writer! The atmosphere is usually more relaxed. You’re not in a familiar place, so it gets your creative juices flowing stronger!

When you’ve edited your book a few times, FIND BETA READERS. These can be friends, followers on social media, or someone random you meet in your coffee/tea shop! Get fresh sets of eyes looking at your work! They will make suggestions, edits, and faun over your book.

Sometimes they’ll make corny jokes.

You will get a TON of feedback, and you will have to compile them all together, chapter by chapter, reading and considering every single comment and comma.

Your beta readers will love you forever when they finish reading your book. Guaranteed. Always. So in love. Yes.

Eventually, your beta readers will finish, and the countdown to publication will begin…

As you near the end, the Universe might have some surprises in store for you. Me? It took me back to the exact seat and window where I wrote the entire first draft of the first book in the series….a very poetic twist of fate.

Finally, the day will come when every major edit is done. When you’ve skimmed and scanned and combed and proofed. When you have a cover design and formatted all the pages to books, it’s time to order those first copies.

And then….the day comes….when your book finally arrives. You see the mail truck pull up and you see the boxes, and you just KNOW it’s for you.

And then you open them and look inside….

And you get to hold it in your hands for the first time ever…..

And you get to put it next to the other books that come before it….

And then you get to ship some of them out to ARC readers who will be reviewing your book before it’s released!!!!

And then you get order an entire shipment for upcoming book signings, and copies to send out to people who pre-ordered, and seeing them all stacked together will ALWAYS be a beautiful sight. Cherish it. Take a picture to show off to potential readers, that image of YOUR books all stacked together.

This is what writing is like. This is what goes into all those thousands of hours of sitting behind a computer. This is how books come into existence. It’s not the same steps for everyone, but the process for all of us is similar. It’s not easy. You won’t see a dime for your work for years, unless you already have books being sold.

But it’s worth it. Pouring your soul into writing a book, or making music, or graphic art… This is the beauty, the struggle, the dedication, the pain, the hours of lost sleep, the gallons of caffeine, the barista friends you make along the way….

Even though they might catch you in your candid element…..

But you will form a bond with them. They will learn your favorite order, have it ready the moment you walk in the door. And if you ever leave, it will be a heart-wrenching day…

They might give you a keepsake, too, to remember them by….

Stay humble, and remember every moment. Every experience. Appreciate everyone who helped you along the way, from giving you free drinks and food, to all the support and encouragement, to the avid fans who rave about your books. They’re all here for you, following your journey as you write.

For this particular book, the journey was 23 months, from December 2015 to October 2017. It takes a long time, even when you work every single day, and stick to a strict schedule. Some days you won’t want to write at all. Some days you won’t want to stop. That’s okay. Just hold true to your passion, and celebrate your accomplishments.

Don’t let anyone tell you not to write. Don’t let anyone tell you you’re doing it wrong. We all live through the same process, from the great artists to the starving artists. If you want to write a book, this is what it looks like. Though writing a book isn’t easy, the reward of holding it in your hands is worth the days, the months, the years. You will have created something beautiful. You will have created art.