lies down in tears


kagehina as b-boys (for hq 69min on twitter) | (dance AU)

Fanfiction - Stealing Tomorrow (Chapter 6)

Chapter 6 – Sins of a Lover

Boston, 10 years and 9 months ago

Claire sat in the wide bench at the hospital’s locker room, her ears filled with a high bleeping sound, the voices around her as distant and foreign as creatures of the bottom of the deepest ocean. Her eyes were fixed on her silver ring – the flesh underneath it raw and reddened after hours of nervously twisting it on her finger, akin to a prisoner fighting a shackle turned life raft.    

“What happened to you?” A shadow extended next to her and she blankly stared above, watching as one of her colleagues, Joe Abernathy, frowned as he looked at her.

“Nothing.” She croaked, her tongue feeling ridiculously dry and furred after hours of screams and sobs in the seclusion of her apartment, followed by a prolonged silence.

“Hmpf.” He vocalized in a doubtful tone. “Ye look more like everything happened, than nothing. Do you want to grab a cup of coffee, Fraser? Or a bucket?”

“Don’t call me that!” She hissed, tears stinging her eyes – Claire tried to keep them forcefully opened, to avoid overflowing. “Claire. Just Claire.”

“Alright.” He said more softly, sitting next to her. His dark skin deeply contrasted with her own, made even more marble white than usual by fatigue and heartbreak.

Joe wasn’t exactly a friend – but he was one of the few colleagues who had shown her compassion and camaraderie, never taking a chance to shine that implied to throw another resident under the proverbial bus. He was always nice and they exchanged pleasantries every time the occasion called for words between them – but Claire had been too busy daydreaming about Jamie for the past few months, to really dedicate herself to the task of establishing a fulfilling friendship. I don’t want you anymore. Claire mechanically pressed the ring against her raw finger, welcoming the pain that kept her grounded to the present.

“You know what?” Joe slapped his big hands against his knees, covered with blue scrubs. “I think I have just the thing you need. A nasty Whipple procedure in OR two in twenty minutes. What do you say?”

“I can’t take your surgery, Joe. You earned that with your hard work assisting Doctor Raymond on that hemorrhoidectomy.” Claire shook her head, crumpling her surgical cap.

“You need to cut, Lady Jane.” He smiled with kindness. “People can say whatever they want, but I know a surgeon when I see one – and you’re it. Once you have the blade in your hand, you’ll be able to forget – or at least to push to the outskirts of your mind – whatever is bothering you so much. On the off-chance that doesn’t work, you can always pretend you’re cutting the face of whoever hurt you.”

Claire breathed deeply – the smell of deodorant and foot powder a soothing presence, reassuring her that some things were still the same. She had come to the hospital almost in the middle of the night for it – trying to leave the wreckage of her life behind the closed door of her apartment - only to discover that the destruction had found a cranny whereby it could enter her body, taking hold of her like a parasite with an innocent host.

If only she could shed her entire body with its memories, like a blessed snake, perhaps she could morph into something else. Freedom. Forgetfulness. Painless breathing again. But she was only allowed blue scrubs, with matching cap and mask – they would have to serve that purpose.

“If you’re sure.” She said hesitantly. “I’ll try not to disturb you too much.”

“Nonsense.” He clapped, ecstatic. You’ll do just fine. Don’t overthink it.”

“Alright.” Claire raised from the bench to tie her black sneakers. Make a loop. Tie it harder. Breathe. As she prepared to walk beside him, she wrinkled her nose in confusion in his direction. “Who the hell is Lady Jane?”


Edinburgh, Present day

“You’re awake.” Claire greeted, entering his room and seeing him half-sited, reclined against a pile of pillows, doing exercises with his hand. “It’s late, but I was quite busy today – a couple of patients from the fire needed to be re-interventioned for some complications.”

“That’s alright.” Jamie gave her a shy smile. “I dinna expect ye to come at all, so it’s a nice surprise.”

“I hear they are offering you a medal for your brave conduct while on duty.” She said in an attempt of conversational tone, sitting on a chair by his bed. “Just saw two grown men sobbing their eyes out while coming here, talking about how Chief Fraser is a goddam hero and saved their lives.”

“Well,” He replied, slightly shrugging his shoulders in a blatant sign of discomfort. “I don’t feel like a hero. More like a fool.”

“Hm.” She snorted in outspoken agreement. “Can’t really challenge that. How is your hand?”

“Rigid. Tender.” Jamie grimaced, showing her the bandaged hand with just the tip of the fingers visible. “But hopefully, in time, I’ll be able to wipe my own arse with it.”

The corners of her mouth almost formed a smile, but she hurriedly commanded them to stop. Almost. He used to make her smile all the time, effortlessly - and it seemed like the wheels and screws of her body still remembered that easy mechanism.

“Claire…” He started in a pleading tone.

“Why do you still wear your wedding ring, Jamie?” Claire anticipated in a low voice. “We have been divorced for almost ten years – and you took away its meaning even before that.”

“Don’t ye know?” He replied in a soft tone, as his fingers dutifully played with the small exercise rubber ball.

“How would I know?” She said, anger bringing an edge to her words. “You told me you didn’t want me anymore. That you had someone else you wanted to be with – I expected to find you remarried with a proper Scottish wife, a handful of children around your bed. And yet there’s no wife around to fluff your pillows and put jelly in the mouth of her valiant husband.”

He tilted his head, as if he was embarrassed by her words. “I had my reasons to say that.”

“Let’s hear them, then.” She crossed her arms and looked impatiently at him. “I believe you owe me at least the curtsy of the truth, Jamie.”

Jamie nodded and for a moment his eyes seemed lost in contemplation of something invisible, pages of their story turning backwards until he could find the appropriate chapter and the words to tell it. When he talked again, his voice was quick and low, slightly ragged.

“Ye were failing.” He looked at her as if urging her to understand. “Ye told me that yourself. Everything ye had worked so hard to accomplish was turning into smoke.” Jamie clenched his jaw. “I knew it was because of me – my fault. When ye met me, I changed the course of yer life. Ye were torn – distracted. I had to do something.”

“What?” Claire whispered, the world slightly tilting around her like a bizarre attraction in an amusement park. “Tell me, Jamie – What did you do?”

“How does a man wilfully rip his heart out of his chest? What madness can drive ye to do such a thing?” He whispered, as if to himself, before he glanced at her. “Not madness – love. I found I could do it, as long as I knew ye safe and well.”

“I don’t understand.” She babbled - but realization was slowly dawning on her, brutal and consuming as wildfire, leaving her shaking like a burnt leaf on the wind.

“I already knew what I needed to do.” Jamie nodded, immersed on his tale – finally able to share his terrible truth, a numbing dart to the poisonous beast that sat on his chest. “I made the decision the night we spoke on the phone – promised to myself I’d do it when I went to visit ye. But I couldn’t!” He closed his healthy hand on a fist, his body trembling from strong emotion. “I was weak. I couldna stop myself from loving ye again and again – knowing I couldna lie to yer body; swearing every time I touched ye would be the last. One last day of happiness – one last memory I could hold on to.”

Claire was openly crying by then, tears silently falling across her cheeks, witnesses of two broken hearts bleeding together into the world.

“I went to see Doctor Raymond one afternoon.” Jamie gulped. “I was hoping there might be another way. But he confirmed what I already knew – he told me ye were a natural healer, a potential brilliant surgeon, if ye were allowed to focus solely on that. He promised he would take care of you.” He finished softly.

“You told me you didn’t want me!” Claire repeated, lips quivering, her amber eyes open in shock.

“I thought I’d die from saying it. But ultimately I would say that and much worse, Claire.” He affirmed, his blue eyes moist but defiant. “I would deny God himself and Jesus on the cross for yer sake. I would disown my own heart and lungs. There’s no limit for what I’d do for ye to have peace, mo nighean donn.”

“It was not your choice to make!” She sobbed, slightly rocking herself on the chair. “My life, James Fraser. My fucking life. Our life…”

“Aye.” He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand. “It is that. But I canna say I regret it, Claire. Joe told me how many people you saved just today – how every young surgeon looks up to you now. It seems to me I made the right choice.”

“You don’t know a thing…” Claire hissed. “About what I went through. I barely made it…I was barely sane.” Her voice sounded like a woman drowning even to her own ears. “You wouldn’t even see me to sign the divorce papers, you sent Ned Gowan in your place…”

“I never said I wasna a coward.” Jamie admitted, slightly tilting his head. “I dinna trust myself not to fall on my knees and beg yer forgiveness. To tell ye right there and then of my wicked ways. To kiss ye and never let go. I hoped…” His voice broke. “You’d never have to see me again.”

“I thought you were in love with someone else.” Claire sobbed, closing her eyes to block the sight of his face, grimacing in pain. “I couldn’t close my eyes without seeing you laying with a faceless woman, whom you’d say everything you once said to me. Listening all your promises turning into lies.”

“There was never another woman.” He whispered, tears falling down his lashes. “There could never be another woman, Claire. I still wore yer wedding ring because – papers or no – I will forever be married to ye. I will always love ye, mo ghraidh.”

“I could never forgive you for this…” Claire entwined her hands, like a silent prayer for the ability to retrieve what had been lost between them. “You took away my choice. You traded our love for something I never wanted. You decided for us both.”

“Aye.” He swallowed hard – his voice hoarse and broken beyond repair. “But can ye honestly say I was wrong in thinking that this is the woman ye were meant to become? That by letting ye go I wasna in fact loving ye more than I ever could be keeping ye?” Jamie closed his eyes, whispering. “Mine are the sins of a lover. Ye were given to me, Claire – and I loved ye well.”

anonymous asked:

For the MSR Drabble challenge 😁: 54, 110, 53 xx

Yeah, so… this ain’t no drabble. I’m sorry. I’ll be better (read: shorter) next time. Thank you so much for the prompt lovely anon!

54. Why’s there a pregnancy test in the trash? 110.  You passed out for like an hour. 53. Take off your shirt.

If only Mulder had come with her.

Scully clings to the plate in her hand and fills it up with little homemade snacks. They all look good, she thinks, even if she’s not really hungry. She just needs a moment to herself, away from prying family members she hasn’t seen in years, and the food buffet in the kitchen is the best distraction she can find. And distraction is all she needs.

Because Mulder is not here.

She had asked him (almost begged him) to come with her today to the annual Scully family gathering. Will Bill be there? He had mumbled against her chest, his lips unable to remain still, kissing her, covering everything they could reach. Part of her had wanted to lie; no, no, Bill won’t be there. His mouth on her body, though, it had disarmed her. The other part of her, the one she listened to most days, had reminded her that this was Mulder. The man she loved. She was not going to start lying to him now that they were lovers.

But it doesn’t change anything now: She’s all alone here, plenty of things on her mind, and the looks her family keep throwing her way make it worse. She’s happy, of course she is, to spend time with her brothers – even Charlie made it this year –, her nephews and nieces, her mother. Seeing her cousins, new life partners, taller children – it’s all great, it’s exciting, but…

She just misses Mulder by her side.

Scully really doesn’t know when it started; the feeling must have crept up on her these last few years. Clearly, she can manage her life without him. Except. Something is different today. Something she has not found time to talk about with him (or think about herself, really). She’s late. She’s really late. Logic tells her that it’s a crazy notion; she’s barren, she knows that, and yet. Yet, here she is. Her eyes wander over to her purse. Hidden inside somewhere is a pregnancy test. She bought it on a whim on her way here and now…

If only Mulder were here.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, Dana,” one of her cousins apologizes as she bumps into her at the buffet, “Are you all right? You look pale. Here, have a sausage.” It’s one of those small, cocktail sausages that Scully loves so much. Her mother probably bought them for her. Right now the combination of the slightly wrinkly texture and the strong, fatty smell makes her dizzy.

“Uhm, I’m fine,” she croaks, willing her body to relax; her stomach doesn’t listen, though, “Excuse me.” The plate clatters loudly as her fingers let go of it. Scully grabs her purse and sprints to the nearest bathroom. She locks the door, her stomach turning and churning, and throws the purse on the ground. Her knees protest loudly as they come in contact with the cold, hard tiles. There’s no time to think as her stomach lets go of its contents.

Flashbacks from her cancer explode before her eyes unasked. Scully closes them, screws them shut, and refuses to think about that. There’s a pregnancy test in her purse. As unlikely as it is, she thinks rinsing her mouth, she has to try it. Take a pregnancy test. Her hands tremble as she unpacks the small, elongated object. Scully knows too well how they work; she’s wasted many of them during the failed IVF attempts. Her eyes catch her reflection in the mirror. Her cousin was right: she does look pale. Her cheeks are hollow, her eyes exhausted and glassy, and her skin just plain waxy.

If Mulder were here he’d tell her to just take the test. He’d tell her not to worry, she thinks as she opens her zipper, pulls down her pants. He’d assure her that everything, no matter what, would turn out just fine. Mulder is a believer like that. Scully smiles, forgets that she’s peeing on a stick for a moment, and clings to thoughts of Mulder.

Someone knocks on the door, startling Scully. She can’t stay in here for another five minutes. Quickly, she wraps the test up in toilet paper and carefully puts in her purse. She stuffs the boxing into the small trash can, not even thinking about it. She flushes the toilet, washes her hands and checks her face again. When she unlocks the door, she’s looking straight into her mother’s eyes.

“Dana, there you are. Honey, what’s the matter? You’re not sick, are you?” Of course there’s no fooling her mother.

“I’m fine, mom.”

“How about you lie down for a bit?” Gently, her mother pushes her into the direction of one of the bedrooms.  

“I’m fine, really.”

“Just relax a bit,” her mother ignores her, “Our family can be quite exhausting.” She chuckles and Scully can’t do anything but listen to her mother. She sits on the bed, still clinging to her purse, feeling exhausted all of a sudden.

“Don’t worry, honey, I’ll make sure no one bothers you. Get some rest.” Her mother kisses her cheek and Scully feels tears dwell up in her eyes. I might be pregnant, mom. The words, however, get twisted in her tongue. So she simply nods, keeps the tears at bay, and remains still until the door softly clicks shut. The tears fall silently now as Scully lies down, clutching her purse, and quickly, without warning, falls asleep.

Even if she had been awake, behind the closed door she would have not heard her mother exclaim loudly: “Why’s there a pregnancy test in the trash?”

“Hey you.”  


“Wakey wakey.” Mulder chuckles next to her, his breath tickling her cheek. Mulder? She must be dreaming. Without opening her eyes, her lips curl upwards into a warm smile. A soft caress on her cheek and she sighs. What a wonderful dream, she decides.

“I miss you, Mulder.” She mumbles, caught between sleeping and waking.

“I’m right here. All you need to do is open your eyes.”

“Hmm?” Scully opens one eye, sees a blurry version of what could be Mulder, and opens the second one. “Take off your shirt.” She demands and he does as he’s told. Scully traces the scar on his shoulder, the one she put there, and yes, this is real, she decides. It’s really him.

“Mulder, what are you doing here?” The words feel like lead on her tongue and she swallows. Her mouth is much too dry. Mulder, as if reading her mind, hands her a glass of water.

“I thought you might want me here after all.” There’s a shy smile playing on his face, slightly tinged with shadows of guilt.

“Hm, always. But why? Why now? I don’t even know what time it is.” She sits up in bed with some difficulty as Mulder puts his shirt back on.

“Your mom said you passed out for like an hour.”

“Oh my god.” An hour. The pregnancy test. The purse is pushed aside and she stares at it now. She fell asleep before she could even think about any of it. And now Mulder is here. She must have dreamed him here. He’d probably love to hear her say - even think - these words.

“Are you all right? Your mother said you weren’t feeling well.” Mulder is rubbing her back and suddenly she understands.

“She called you.” She states and Mulder nods carefully.

“She was worried about you and she thought that uhm, maybe I should be here. Is there anything to worry about, Scully?”

“No,” she answers quickly,“ well, maybe.” She admits, biting her lip, feeling like the purse is now staring at her. Daring her to look at the test.

“Scully? You’re really scaring me here.”

“I’m sorry, Mulder, “she puts her hand on his stubbly cheek, “It’s just… I don’t really know how to say this. We’ve never talked about it before and now- I don’t know how to say it.”

“Scully, you can tell me anything. You know that.” She nods without looking at him.

“I wanted you here all day for this,” she reaches for her purse, “So I guess it’s a good thing I fell asleep.” Scully chuckles and immediately quiets when she catches Mulder’s confused look.

“It’s something we haven’t really talked about. Not… not like this anyway,” his face reminds her that she’s not making any sense, “Maybe it’s all a moot point anyway.” She takes a deep breath, reaches into her purse and takes out the toilet paper wrapped bundle. Glancing at it, she offers it to Mulder instead.

“Uhm, thank you?” He picks it apart layer by crumpled up layer. For a moment he stares at the stick then his face lifts up to meet hers. His lips are opened slightly, ready to say something, but there are no words.

“Is that…”

“A pregnancy test.”

“I… Scully, I thought you… I thought. It wasn’t the IVF, I mean that was, uhm… it really wasn’t the IVF, was it?” Mulder still holds the test in both hands, stares at it like it’s made of gold.

“What does it say?” Her voice quivers, she realizes, and she is thankful that this time she’s not alone.

“You don’t know?” Mulder’s eyes give nothing away but his surprise.

“No, I fell asleep before the time was up. What does it say? Do I want to know?”

“Oh, I think you want to know.” He grins, holding up the stick with shaky hands, showing her the impossible.

She’s pregnant.

Baby Daddy● Dean x Reader●

Originally posted by deangifsdaily

Masterlist |Send In A Request

Synopsis: Dean Finds out he has a kid when him, Sam and Marry go to investigate a case.

Request: Dean request? A fluff one. Where the reader and him use to be a thing but she leaves. Dean Sam and Mary go to the case and finds out it was the reader that got injured and dean finds out he has a kid. Can she be 4 . Awkward fluff- Anonymous

A/N: I decided to do this fluff one since I’ve done a lot of angst. Fix your hearts from my angst.

WARNINGS: Fluff, supernatural themes,demons.

“Mummy, can you sing that song?” Alyssa, your four year old daughter asked, as you tucked her into bed.

“Of course sweetie” you cooed, laying down next to her on your side, stroking her hair. Her green eyes looking at you tiredly.

“Hey Jude, don’t make it bad, take a sad song and make it better, remember to let her into your heart, then you can start to make it better, hey Jude, don’t be afraid, you were made to go out and get her, the minute you let her under your skin, then you begin to make it better,And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrain, don’t carry the world upon your shoulders, for well you know that it’s a fool who plays it cool, by making his world a little colder, nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah” you sang softly, noticing her eyes flutter shut.

“Goodnight my little sweet pea” you whispered, kissing her forehead.

Quietly getting up and walking towards the door. Turning around to look at her sleeping soundly.

You let out a sigh, turning off the light. You shut

She looked so much like Dean.

“Time to clean up” you mumbled, walking down the stairs.

Walking up to the sink, turning the tap on. Grabbing the dishcloth and putting it under the water.

Ringing it out and walking to the table to wipe it.

You started to hum the rest of hey Jude, as you wiped away. You stopped humming Hey Jude, when a loud moan came through the thin walls the separated your townhouse from the other one.

“At least someone is getting lucky” you grunted, as you put the dishcloth back into the sink.

You turned around to see the lights flicker. A loud blood curling scream rang through the room.

“Son of bitch” you cursed, running up the steps and into your room. You quickly grabbed your gun from your dresser. Running back out only for something to wrap around your legs

“Mummy” Alyssa cried, as she hugged you tighter.

“Alyssa, I need you to go to your room okay sweetie and don’t come out until I come back, I’m going to go see if our neighbors are okay” you said, making her nod, she took off running towards her room.

You ran down the stairs and out the door, opening your neighbor’s door.

Your noise wrinkled when the smell of sulfur hit your noise.

“Typical” you grumbled, as you rounded the corner, into the master bedroom.

“Put the knife down” you demanded, raising the gun, making him turn around.

“Oh god” you gasped out, as his eyes turned around his eyes pitch black. His neck cut.

“There’s she is” he chuckled.

“What did you do Jack?” you asked, knowing fully well what he did.

“Jack, Jack is dead, so are these two” he laughed.

“Why?” you asked, putting your finger on the trigger.

“I knew I’d find you, you can hide from Dean but you can’t hide from me” he explained.

“I’m not a hunter anymore” you grumbled, glaring at him as he took a step forward.

“I know that but you are something special to him” he said.

“We’re not to get her anymore” you grumbled, making him raise his hand, pinning you to the wall.

“Hmm, your hiding something, you look more mature, more motherly” the demon hummed, making you gulp.

“Don’t tell me you had his child and ran away with it, oh this gets better and better” he chuckled, banging your head against the wall.

“Leave her out of your little grudge against Dean” you growled, hearing ambulance sirens in the distance.

“See you soon princess” he smirked, expelling himself out of Jacks body.

You let out a gasp, quickly running out of the house and into your own. You drowned out the loud sirens as you took out your phone, scanning through your contacts until you found Sam’s contact. You pressed it, pressing the call button holding it to your ear.

“Please pick up, please” you whispered.

“Hello” Sam answered.

“Sam, I need your help, I think a demons going to kill Alyssa” you whimpered, holding the mobile phone tightly.

“I’m on my way” sam. said.

“Mummy” Alyssa whimpered, making you look at her. You quickly hang up the call, putting your phone in your pocket.

“Alyssa, sweetie” you gasped out.

“I heard you” she said, as you walked up to her, kneeling in front of her.

“Alyssa, let’s get you to bed” you mumbled, picking her up and walking up the stairs.

“You’re bleeding mummy” Alyssa whimpered, as her finger touched your wound.

“I’m fine” you said.

“Are they okay?” she asked, as you gently layed her down on her bed.

“I don’t know” you lied, as tears threatened to fall from your eyes.

“Don’t cry, your too pretty to cry” she said, making you smile.

“Sleep time” you said, pulling the covers over her.

“Can you stay with me?” she asked, giving you puppy dog eyes.

“Of course” you said, laying down next to her.

“If daddy was here he’d protect us” she said, cuddling into your chest.

“Yeah” you mumbled, kissing the top of her head….


“Vancouver aye” Dean said, as he turned the radio down.

“Yep” Sam said.

“So miss fancy pants gets herself into trouble her neighbour, which is an old friend of yours, helped her and now she wants your help, couldn’t see just call the cops” Dean grumbled. Not happy that he had to travel all the way to Vancouver.

“Dean, she sounded in trouble and I just thought maybe it’s what we hunt” Sam lied. He couldn’t tell him the truth.

“How did you meet this friend of yours?” Dean asked, making Sam roll his eyes.

“We just meet” Sam bluntly answered, making Dean and Mary look at each other.

“Is she hot? Is she single?”  Dean asked.

“Dean” Mary warned.

“Dean I don’t think she’s looking for anyone, she’s got a child” Sam grumbled, looking down at his phone.

“Oh, maybe if I save her from this creature, she might give me something in return” Dean smirked, making Sam let out a fake gag.

“You sure you want moan (y/n)’s name or think about (y/n)” Sam said, making Dean glare at him through the rear view mirror.

“Who’s (y/n)?” Mary asked, making Dean grip the steering wheel tight.

“Just this girl I used to know” Dean grumbled.

“A girl that broke his heart, he was so in love with her, that he was so whipped” Sam said, making Mary smile.

“I did not, I’m not whipped over her” Dean grumbled.

“Why did she leave?” Mary asked.

“Don’t know, I’ll ask her the next time I see her, if that’s even possible, she went off the grid” Dean grumbled.

“Maybe she had her reason, wanted a normal life” Mary said.

“Normal, she grow up in a family of hunters” Dean laughed.

The rest of the carried was filled with silence.

“Dean, be cool” Sam said, as they hoped out of the car, walking up the pathway that led to your door.

“You be cool” Dean grumbled.

“I’m serious Dean” Sam grumbled.

“So am I” Dean shot back.

“Okay, boys that enough” Mary, stopping their bickering.

Her hand knocked on the door.

“He started it” Dean whined, as Mary knocked on the door.

The door opened, making Deans eyes widen in shock.

“Hey” you greeted, avoiding eye contact with Dean.

“(y/n)” Dean stuttered, making you avert your gaze to sam.

“I’m guessing this is the (y/n) that hurt you” Mary assumed.

“Is Alyssa alright?” Sam asked, as he wrapped his arms around you.

“Yeah, she’s just in lounge room, watching some cartoon” you said.

“Alyssa, who’s that, your life partner?” Dean bitterly asked. As Sam let go of you.

“No my daughter” you grumbled, glaring at him.

“Oh right, of course, you’re probably settled down” Dean grumbled, as Mary and Sam awkwardly looked back and forth between you too.

“No, anyways come in” you sighed, opening the door wide.

“It’s Homey” Dean commented, making you roll your eyes.

“It’s a demon, I saw it with my own two eyes, it’s after me and Alyssa” You explained.

“Should of ganked it then, save us the trip” Dean grumbled.

“Do you have to be a dickhead to me” you grumbled.

“Yeah, you left me and went to have a kid” Dean snapped.

“For Christ shakes Dean, Alyssa is your daughter” you snapped, making Dean’s eyes widen.

“What?” Dean gasped out, as he looked at you.

“I didn’t leave you because I wasn’t in love with you, I left you because I was pregnant with our daughter’ you confessed, making Dean go pale.

“I-I have a daughter and you didn’t tell me” Dean shouted, starting to get angry with you. How dare you kept this from him.

“Come on Dean, do you really think raising a child in motel rooms is the ideal childhood, she needs a stable home Dean, away from demons and creatures” you grumbled.

“That’s working well for you isn’t it, a demon found you” Dean growled.

“Shut up Dean, I wouldn’t have called you if it didn’t put our daughter in danger” you shouted.

Making Sam and Mary let out an awkward cough.

“I can’t be in the same room with you right now, I can’t believe you had our daughter and didn’t tell me” Dean grumbled, walking past you and out the door.

“I’ll go talk to him” Sam said, as he walked past you to follow Dean.

“Thanks” you mumbled, looking at Mary, as she gave you an apologetic smile.

“I’m sorry, I’m (y/n)” you introduced yourself.

“Mary, Dean and Sam’s mums” Mary said.

“Yeah, Sam told me how you came back, um, do you want a tea or coffee?” you asked, as both of you’s walked into the kitchen.

“Tea, will do” Mary said, as she looked at your daughter looking intently at the screen.

“It’s not your fault (y/n) that you wanted a normal life for Alyssa, Dean understands that” Mary said, as you put two teabags in two cups.

“I should have told him” you mumbled, looking up at her.

“Should of told who what?” Alyssa asked, making you look at her. Her head poking, her green eyes looking curious at you and Mary.

Mary smiled at her, making her shyly look away.

“Um, I just forgot to tell the police this morning how well we knew them” you lied, she gave you a wary look then looked at Mary.

“Who are you?” she asked, in a small voice, her green eyes widen in fear.

“Mary” Mary said, smiling at her.

“Oh” Alyssa mumbled, as she looked back at the TV screen.


“There you are” Sam sighed, as he sat on the bar stool next to Dean.

“I can’t believe she didn’t tell she had my daughter” Dean grumbled, as he drank the whiskey.

“Dean” Sam sighed, as Dean put his glass down, signalling to the bar tender to fill it up.

“I deserved to know” Dean grumbled. As the bar tender looked at sam. Sam shook his head no making the bar tender go away.

“She did tell me” Sam said, making Dean look at him.

“And you didn’t tell me, your not even the father” Dean grumbled, running his hand down his face.

“Dean, she is the mother of your child, give her a break” Sam said.

“She left me and took our child, my little girl could have grown up without knowing her dad” Dean ranted, making Sam roll his eyes.

“Dean just talk to her, try and fix this, and maybe if you’re lucky you’s two can rekindle your relationship” Sam said, standing up.

“Fine, let’s go” Dean grumbled, throwing a bill, standing up.


Dean and Sam walked through the door, making you look up, from stirring the pasta.

“Uncle Sammy” Alyssa squealed, as she rang up to him, wrapping her tiny arms around his legs.

“Hey Alyssa, this is Dean, my brother” Sam said, kneeling down. She let out a giggle as she looked at Dean.

“Are you my uncle too?” she asked, looking at him in awe.

Dean gulped as her green eyes stared at him intently.

“Um” Dean mumbled, looking at you, then back at Alyssa.

“Alyssa honey, why don’t you show Dean and Sam to the guest room, so they know where they are sleeping” you said.

“Yay, sleepover” she squealed, grabbing their hands and dragging them up the stairs.

“It’s right next to my room” she said, as she opened the door. She turned around towards them smiling at them.

“We have the same eyes and same hair colour” Alyssa noted, as she looked at Dean.

“Must be magic” Dean said, making her giggle.

“My mummy said my daddy saves lives and that’s why his not around a lot I want to meet him one day” Alyssa mumbled, a frowning.

Dean’s heart beat faster at what Alyssa said.

“Hey” you said, walking into the room, making Alyssa’s smile.

“Foods ready” you said.

“Can Dean give me a piggy back ride?” she asked, giving you puppy dog eyes.

“Ask him” you said, looking at Dean.

“Please Dean” she begged, giving him puppy dog eyes.

“With those eyes it hard to say no” Dean said, making her smile.


“Don’t do that Dean” you grumbled, as you put the clean dishes away.

“Mum is asleep and Sam, I put Alyssa to sleep, you know I had to sing Hey Jude to her” Dean smirked, as you turned around towards him.

“Yeah, it’s the only song that will get her to go to sleep. Plus I think she likes you” you said, as you moved past him, only for him to grab your arm and turn you around to face him.

“I’m sorry about this afternoon” Dean apologised, his hand cupping your cheek.

“It’s okay, I understand” you mumbled, averting your eyes to the ground. Only for Dean to tilt your chin up.

“She told me that you told her that her daddy saved lives” Dean said, making your breathing get heavier.

“Yeah, she asked and I just-I” you stuttered.

“Sh” Dean hushed, as his lips pressed against yours softly.

You wrapped your arms around his neck.

“How cute” Alyssa sneered, making you and Dean pull apart.

“Honey” you gasped out, as she smirked, her eyes turning black.

“Son of a bitch” you and Dean cursed, Dean pulled you behind him.

“Oh Dean, I’ve dreamed about this for a long time” she sneered, raising her hand and pinning him against the ceiling.

“Alyssa sweetie” you gasped out, as the demon walked closer to you, pinning you against the floor.

The lights flickered, as Alyssa towered above you, eyes black.

“No” you cried, as a knife plunged into your abdomen.

“You let her go you sick bastard, let the both of them go” Dean growled, from the ceiling.

“Shut up you whore, you know (y/n) for a mother you should of protected her from demons but of course you’re a bad mother just like your mother when you were little

“Please just” you begged, making the demon laugh. It hurt you to listen to Alyssa’s laugh, even though it wasn’t hers.

“I told you I’d kill you and dean is going to watch your precious creation kill his love” the demon snarled.

“Hey” Sam shouted, making the demon glare at him and Mary.

“Oh more” the demon smirked.

“Come get me” Sam shouted.

Making the demon step forward, it tried to move but couldn’t.

“Devils trap” you mumbled.

Making it growl.

Sam quickly took out

Dean fell beside you, letting out a groan.

“You okay?” you asked.

“Peachy” Dean grumbled.

He turned towards you his eyes widen at your wound.

“(Y/n), whoa hey” Dean mumbled.

“Please look after her if I die” you whispered.

“You’re not going to die” Dean said, making you smile at him weakly.

“Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica potestas omnis incursio infernalis adversarii. Omnis legio! Omnis con…potestas, omnis incursio infernalis adversarii. Omnis legio! Omnis congregatio et secta diabolica! Ergo, Draco maledicte et omnis……legio diabolica, adiuramus te! Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursio infernalis adversarii. Omnis legio! Omnis congregatio et secta diabolica! Ergo, Draco maledicte et omnis legio diabolica, adiuramus te!” sam yelled,black smoke escaping.

Mary quickly caught Alyssa before she hit the ground.

Your eyes flutter shut making Dean panic.


“Alyssa awake Dean” Sam said, making Dean look up. Dean gave Alyssa a weak smile, as she walked into the room that you were in.

“I hurt mummy” she sobbed, as she stood next to Dean.

“It wasn’t you” Dean said, tucking a lose piece of hair behind her ear.

“He, the guy he said that you were my farther”

“Yeah, I’m your dad” Dean said.

“I want my mummy” she cried.

“Hey, sh, it’s okay, come here cutie” Dean sighed, as Alyssa wrapped.

“I’m sorry daddy, I hurt mummy” she cried, as Dean kissed the side of her head.

“You’s two are so cute” you weakly said, making them look at you.

“Mummy, I am so sorry” she cried, as she climbed on the bed, Dean helping her.

“Hey sweetie pie” you cooed, as she wrapped her arms around you, resting her head against your chest.

“Hey” you said, as Dean’s hand stroked your cheek.

“Hey” Dean cooed.

“I think me and Alyssa should live with you and Uncle Sam” you said.

“Like a family?” she asked, her eyes lighting up with happiness, as she looked at you then Dean.

“Yeah” you said, smiling at Dean.

“Are you sure?” Dean asked, making you nod.

“What about you cutie?” Dean asked, making you blush.

“Yes” she answered, as you moved over to make room for Dean.

He wrapped his arm around you and Alyssa cuddling into your side.

“I love you’s both, so much” Dean whispered, kissing your temple.

“We love you too” you mumbled, turning your head to look at him.

Deans lips touching yours softly…

Sorry if this sucked. But part two of Run and Hide is coming out tomorrow..

TAG SQUAD:  @your-silver-and-gold @bananakid42 @imslytherin4life @star-gazer178 @livelovelike555 @thegreatficmaster

On Her Own

Character/Pairing: Female!Reader x Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer

Word Count: 577

Warnings: Angst


This is my entry for Laura’s (@just-another-busy-fangirl​ ) 1K Followers Musical Challenge. 
Song Prompt: ‘On My Own’ - Les Miserables 


I’m not that keen on writing angst but the song was great for it, I just hope I’m able to make you all a little bit sad at least.

[Feedback’s the way to show your love and appreciation]

On Her Own

She yawns as the final credits roll down the black screen, matching the dark room around her and she covers her mouth with cold, numb fingers that barely feel hers anymore. With watery eyes - as a combination of tiredness and the bittersweet ending of the film- she sniffs and wipes her nose with the end of the long sleeve of the borrowed flannel she’s wearing.

She shivers as a cold breeze reaches the exposed skin of her thighs inside the oversized garment, shaking her right hand finds the pad, moving around a bit until the little arrow appears and she double clicks away, finally finding what she’s looking for.

The old pictures make a sad smile tug at the sides of her lips and tears finally spill from the corner of her bloodshot eyes.

“Feeling sentimental,” a deep voice asks from behind, provoking goosebumps all over her body. Yet, she doesn’t answer and scrolls to the next picture.

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I’ve seen them come and go.
I’ve seen them make her feel on top of the world and then they pull the rug up from under her feet.
I hope you’re different. I hope you’re stronger. I hope you understand her and don’t turn another way at the first, ‘Road Work Ahead’ sign you see.
She’s complex and very hesitant, if you stay you’ll understand why.
She deserves the best.
Seeing her broken down by so many people just looking for a challenge has made me despise the human race.
Be better than her past.
Tell her she looks like a goddess in her yellow dress.
Prove to her not everyone is a coward.
Show her what it’s like to be with someone genuine.
Take her to see puppies and take a million pictures of her playing with them, even when she tears herself down with lies saying she looks like garbage.
And god dammit, remind her that another persons arms aren’t a jail cell.
—  a PSA from a very apprehensive best friend.
The Best

pairing: platonic hamilsquad x depressed!reader

genre: angst! modern au

word count: 1700

warning: mentions of depression, death/suicide

summary: you haven’t been at school all week, you haven’t been answering texts. eventually, the boys decided that they’re not going to wait for you to reply anymore, and take matters into their own hands.

a/n: yoo so sorry for the angsty thing, i was planning on putting up some starboy laurens fluff but ive been having a pretty bad day meself so. wrote some angst cuz it made me feel better. if you’re having a bad day i hope it helps and i hope u feel good tomorrow!

You had spent the week in bed. Your work was beginning to pile up – in both a metaphorical and literal sense, you thought as you looked at the pile of papers on your desk – and you probably got more texts in the past five days than you’ve gotten in the past year. Everyone was worried about you. Just today, Alexander had left you 3 voicemails and he sent you 51 messages in the span of 6 minutes; John sent you 2 pictures of Lafayette and Hercules playing checkers, and then one of himself pouting because, as he put it, he ‘wanted to see you’; Lafayette sent you a video of himself singing some French song that was supposed to be a lullaby but it didn’t really help; Hercules sent you a picture of himself in a ridiculous hat. 

Nothing cheered you up. You hadn’t had this bad of a spell in years, but lately things had gotten worse and couldn’t bring yourself to do anything. You just couldn’t.

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anonymous asked:

An imagine where Theo is having severe ptsd and Liam/Scott/whoever decides he needs to see a therapist, but Theo doesn't want to go to therapy alone.

Your suffering is my command.

He lays on the bed in the dark, cuddled into a pillow, he sniffs as his body shakes with his crying. He presses the pillow closer and clutches it hard as another sob leaves his body. He’s been like this for a full hour now. Stopping and starting, over and over. He doesn’t even know why he is upset for. He has suffered so much before, acted so strong and held himself together, but its times like this when he can’t pretend anymore. He takes a big shaking breath and rubs the wetness of his face, for a little time he falls quiet, his hand stroking the side of the pillow. He sniffs again and closes his eyes, hearing a car driving down the street, the lights shining around the ceiling but he ignores it. He stays there until he falls asleep.

Downstairs Liam watches as Scott places the room, the Alpha looks troubled. Liam knows why.

“What sort of help Liam? Theo doesn’t seem to need our help” Scott reasoned “And, why would he?”

“He needs help” Liam listened to upstairs, but there was no sound of walking coming from the room above. “Scott, it’s the third time this week, and last week he barely slept, he was shouting about his sister in his sleep and we did that to him- “

“Theo did that to her” Scott knew he shouldn’t get angry with Liam, but it was hard

“I know, but I was the one who got him out of there. He’s not the same as he used to be, he’s different now and there’s something wrong with him. Last night he was just sat up in bed for ages, just looking at the floor, for hours. He’s up there now and I know he’s crying. He does that a lot too, there is just something wrong with him, he doesn’t sleep and when he does he wakes up screaming his sister’s name, he gets confused and looks around the room as if he doesn’t believe he’s really here”

Scott sat on the sofa next to Liam. Conflicted over wanting to help, but not wanting to get hurt. Not yet ready to forgive the person who killed him. He remembered Theo’s maniac expression as he sunk his claws into Scott’s chest. His mind flickered to the boy who smiled at him in the rain, approaching Scott as an old friend returning home. He remembered the concerned boy in the locker room, sitting down next to him to tell him lies and deceit. He sees the fake tears falling down Theo’s face as he teary tells Scott the lies about Stiles killing Donovan

“Are you sure? Absolutely sure this isn’t an act?” Scott warned.
Liam took a while to answer, but then he nodded
“I’m sure. It’s real”

Long soggy hair strands covering her ghostly pale face… the stench of rotten flesh… the decaying bones all ripped open… Her hand pulling out his heart.
Theo leaped up and slammed his head into the headboard, the pillow hitting the floor. A yelp escaped Theo’s mouth and his stomach churned, making him dash to the bathroom, making it just in time. Coughing he flushed the toilet and washes his mouth out. Then washing his face. His hair stuck up untidy, his eyes red and puffy, his face pale. His eyes looked red. He was a mess. He filled a cup with water and sat on the bathtub drinking, his hand shaking as his other checked to make sure his heart was there still. His hands were freezing cold, so were his feet, but the rest of him felt clammy and hot. He wanted to get his hoodie from downstairs so went down the stairs to get it, stopping as he heard Liam talking to Scott.
About him.

“Maybe I should ask my dad to talk to him? Your mother doesn’t really get on with him. He really needs help, isn’t there medication for this? I – I give him Risperdal the other day, he was so upset, he was shaking and he couldn’t breathe right, I don’t know what was happening to him, it used to make me tried so I give him some, he doesn’t know, I crushed some in his drink. It calmed him down a little, he managed to sleep, but I can’t keep drugging him”

Theo frowned, remembering earlier this week when he became really sleeping and went to bed early. Liam didn’t seem surprised. Theo vowed to be more careful around the younger boy.

“Liam, you can’t just drug Theo” Scott sounded exhausted
“I know! I won’t do it again. I thought I was helping him…” Liam muttered.

The step Theo was on groaned, the two boys stopped talking.  Theo closed his eyes hard and opened them when he heard Liam say his name from the room.

“Theo?” Liam’s head came from the sitting room. Theo’s eyebrow raised “Just getting- a drink” Theo shrugged, walking down and past Liam, seeing Liam noticing how rough he looks.

Scott followed Theo into the kitchen. Theo didn’t make eye contact with the Alpha, didn’t look around at him.
“At the hospital they do one to one appointments, my mom does them often without patients. Stiles went once. Maybe you should drop in. Liam says you’ve been having a bad time?”
Theo still didn’t look up; his shoulder was tucked into his neck. He lowered it, trying to relax a little. A hot tear ran down Theo’s face.  He blinked the others away and just nodded. Taking his time making a drink without letting Scott see his tears. It had gotten to the point where even Scott pitied him. He drank slowly, still facing away from Scott until the other boy walked out the room. Theo stayed in there, alone, his lips moving by themselves, sometimes shaking, other times moving to the side. He traced his finger over drops of water around the sink.

He heard the door opening and closing… Scott had left.

“Maybe you should think of going.” Liam came back “It may help you. What you said happened down there with the skinwalkers- “Theo turned around and Liam seen just how tired the other boy looked, how broken he was “You don’t have to face it alone Theo. I can ask my dad, he knows therapist and Melissa, she has access to medication. Maybe its stress you are suffering from, maybe- “Liam broke off. Theo’s eyes were all watery, his lip moving by itself. He looked so much younger. 

Right away Liam went to him and held him. Stroking the back of Theo’s head, he heard the other boy asking Liam to come with him. 


Part 1

Warning: mention of rape and abuse!

It feels weird to live in a house with constant water and electricity again. But it also weird to be reunited with your old friends, even when most of them are already dead.
And they changed.
Not in the negative way as far as you can say, but they did.
Especially Rick whose blue eyes became cold and kind of wary whenever he looks at you and thinks you don’t see it.

“What happened after the farm? Were you with a group?”

“ I was alone.”

He didn’t believe you.
Even when it was the truth.
Well, kind of. You were with a group, but it was involuntary.
And you were alone in the small room with the dreary grey walls and the few blankets on the ground.
You can’t tell him and the others. You probably should, but you don’t know how they’ll react.
How Rick will react.

With a sigh you step in the shower, warm water streams down your body and you close your eyes in enjoyment. The shampoo smells delightful tangy as you spread it over your body. You grimace as your hands slide over the bulging scars where they marked you. Fighting against the nausea in your stomach and you quickly concentrate on washing your hair. Hot tears watering your eyes as you rush out of the shower and pull the big towel around your body like it could protect you.
As you look in the mirror you see nothing more than the image of the young woman you used to be. There was a time where you were proud of your body, but when you look now on the clearly visible ribs and hipbones…
“(Y/N)? I’ve some clothes for you. Can I come in?”
It’s Michonne, Rick’s girlfriend and from what you’ve heard a good fighter. You like her and her calm nature.
“Yea, come in.”
“Here.” She smiles and gives you the clothes, her eyes laying on the scar in your face. “You know that you can trust Rick, right?”
“Can I when he doesn’t even trust me?” You ask quietly.
“He does trust you, he’s just worried.” She watches you through the mirror. “He talked about you.”

Of course, he did. He had to explain who you are.

“Before I mean and also Andrea spoke about you.”


“You let it sound like I’m something special.” You narrow your eyes at her.
“You were to them.” She chuckles and heads to the door, turning one last time around. “Supergirl.”
Against your will you snort amused. Glenn gave you the nickname after he saw you fighting the first time and after some time everyone called you like that. Also Daryl, even when it was more ironical.
With a better feeling you go downstairs after you got dressed, looking for Rick. A smile appears on your face as you find him in the kitchen where he feeds Judith. Some of the baby food is on his right cheek, but it doesn’t seem to bother him.
“Hey, can we talk when you’re done?” You ask and sit down across from them.
“We can now.” Rick nods as Judith suddenly puts her head on his shoulder and yawns.
“Ok.” Thickly swallowing you look at him as the first tears run down your cheeks. “I-I lied to you. I was with a group…”
A bitter laugh leaving your mouth. “… or let’s say they forced me to stay with them.”
“What happened?”

You were so happy that you found a group, even when you weren’t sure if you should go with them. Most of them were men, but also a few women.
But it was your best chance to get away from the streets and so you followed them to the building and didn’t question it as they locked you in a room.
“We need to be sure that we can trust you.” One of them said and you believed him.
They gave you food and water and also let you shower.

“I was so stupid, Rick.” Your hands are trembling as you wipe the tears from your face. “I thought I found the heaven with all the food they had and water. But it was hell.”
You can see that he knows what comes now, anger flickers in his eyes.

They drugged you, otherwise you can’t explain the dizzy feeling in your head. A painful yelp escaped your mouth as they threw you to the ground and pulled for your jeans and panties.
A pool of blood built between your legs as they forced themselves in you, pressing your head and upper body to the ground as you tried to crawl away.

You stop as Rick’s fist meets the table and Judith let out a whine.
“They did that to your face, right?”
“They did more.” You admit quietly and stand up.
While you’re taking a deep breath, you pull your shirt over the head. His eyes widen in shock and he shakes his head like he can’t believe it.
“I quickly learned that my screams… my screams turned them even more on.” You get back in your shirt and sit down again. “So, I tried to stay in silence.”
He nods understands and reaches out for your hand. Your fingers interlock with each other and the old feeling of friendship you shared is back.
It feels good, so good.
“How did you…”
“Escaped? I don’t know. One night there was a fight and one of them forgot to lock the door. I just ran.” You shrug slightly.
“Where is the building?”

Revenge. He wants revenge.  

“I don’t know. I barely remember the way, only that it’s in the woods.”
“Ok, ok…” He says and pulls back as Judith sobs quietly. “But you’ve to give me something, (Y/N), so that I can help you.”
“I just.. there was name they mentioned again and again.” With a frown you try to think about the night when you ran away.
It’s like your brain erased it.
“Tell me the name.”
You look up at him. “Negan.. the name was Negan.”

Part 3?

anonymous asked:

So did Ouma enjoy telling lies? I remember reading one of your older metas saying that lying wasn't something he necessarily enjoyed, but him doing it as often as he did made me sorta think otherwise? Also could you go into detail about "gentle lies"?

I’ve been getting quite a lot of questions about this particular subject later, so I thought I might answer them altogether like this!

The short answer to “did Ouma enjoy lying” is—well, yes and no. The long answer is a bit more complex, because it all depends on what kind of lies, who he’s lying to, and his own desire to construct and maintain a very carefully crafted façade so that no one would ever get close to him or figure out “the real him.”

One way to put it might be that Ouma very much liked the idea of lying, as long as it was used the right way, for the right purposes. He’s very much a prankster at heart, and like any good prankster, he’s pretty open about enjoying deception in the small scale. Tricks, jokes, pranks—all of these things when done right are relatively harmless and they’re all various forms of lies. And most importantly, from Ouma’s perspective, they’re all fun.

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Karamel Fanfic #29 Part 3/3

WARNING! Mild spoilers up to Supergirl 2x14

Title: Reunion

Prompt: Kara and Mon-El’s date is interrupted by an unexpected turn of events: A spaceship that harbors the royal family of Daxam.

Word Count: 6394 (!!!!)

Part 3 of Someone Who Forgives Him

Part 1:

Part 2:

Also posted on AO3


Note: Yep, I finished it. Yep, I stayed up till 1:30 to do it. Yep, it’s MORE THAN 6000 WORDS. And yep, I have absolutely no regrets. I hope you enjoy it :)

Note 2: I might write a companion piece to this where Mon-El talks to his parents, would you be interested in something like that?

Kara couldn’t sleep. No matter how much she tried, no matter how tightly she shut her eyes and urged herself to clear her head, it wasn’t working. She’d tried counting from one until she fell asleep, yet around 247 she got distracted again. She’d tried thinking about her favorite TV show, but it….

It only reminded her of Mon-El. Again. She couldn’t get him out of her mind.

For definitely not the first, and probably not the last time that night, she remembered his face when she told him he wasn’t a hero. When she ripped the House of El symbol off his chest. She was so angry, too angry at him that she didn’t want to listen to his excuses, she didn’t want to know why he hadn’t told her about being the prince. All she could think was that he lied to her, and it hurt. So she wanted him to feel how he felt. She wanted him to hurt as well for what she’d done to him.

She couldn’t have regretted her actions more.

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Hoseok Scenario: Building Hope.

Request: A scenario with J hope(or any other member I would be satisfied with any) he helps you overcome depression, thanks 

Genre: Angst / Fluff

It was confusing, you still couldn’t put your finger on the reasons why or how he seemed to know, unlike the others around you.

Whenever Hoseok’s eyes fell on you after you pronounced one of your endless excuses, or whenever you smiled brightly pulling up a wall of joy in front of your being to cover up and disguise the real way in which your soul felt like it was rotting, Hoseok never, ever seemed to be fooled by it.

There was always that spark of acknowledgement on his eyes, never accusatory but rather worried, that still confused every cell and particle of your being.

– If you don’t let me in through the door, there’s no problem at all– Hoseok shrugged nonchalantly, kicking the air with his foot softly while you observed him standing in your porch. –I can always let myself in through the window, how about that?–

He smiled seemingly delighted to that idea and you only blinked surprised. Hoseok shoved his hands inside his pockets casually, as if breaking into your house was an everyday thing for him.

God knew you needed the solitude of your own space now more than anything, that you hadn’t refused Hoseok’s offer to walk you home only because you were too tired and worn out for the day with trying to keep up your facade, and you were sure he was going home after leaving you at your doorstep.

–Look Hoseok…– you started, forcing yourself to smile which was a mistake because it made him look at you in that way, as if he knew every secret lying beneath that smile. –I’m really tired. Thanks for walking me here, you’re so kind but I… I need to rest– I need to shut down, were the words you didn’t say.

–I can see you’re tired – he approached you a little more. –I can see you’re tired every day Y/N. So I don’t want to leave you alone–

You wondered what else he knew, what else he had noticed since he started hanging out with you around college.

All you thought you wanted was to be left alone, but the moment Hoseok said he wasn’t leaving you, your longing soul clung to those words and you admitted to yourself that deep down, the least you wanted was to be left alone.

So you moved to the side to let him in, which got you a smile so bright and pure, so full of dazzling honesty it was as warm as the sun and you wondered, not for the first time, why Hoseok would like to be with someone that even when trying hard, could only smile like gloomy clouds.

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Tommy's Girl [4/?]

Tommy x OC Alfie’s sister.

Warnings: language, potentially upsetting topics

Part Four. Part 5. Part 3. Part 2. Part 1.

It was midnight on Wednesday when car pulled up to a house bigger than any Emily had seen in London.

“Is this yours?” Emily asked, awed by the size of the mansion.

“I suppose it’s yours now, too.” Tommy sighed, getting out of the car.

“It’s bigger than anythin’ I’ve ever seen in my life.” She gaped, craning her neck to look at the upper windows. Tommy cocked an eyebrow.

“Where did you live with your brother?” He questioned, not looking at her.

“We had a house next to the bakery. It was only small though.” Emily replied, grabbing a hold of her suitcases.

“Here y'are, let me have one of those cases, I can’t let you carry ‘em both yourself.” Tommy thought manners would make the whole situation a lot easier. “We’ll go through to my office, that’s where I’ve had the family gather.”

They walked through the house together, neither daring to speak a word. Tommy stopped outside the office and looked at Emily. “I’ll go in first. Can you try and look a little bit happy, please?”

Thomas quietly entered the room and signalled for Emily to wait behind him while he announced her arrival. He stepped aside to reveal her. “This is Alfie Solomons’ sister, Emily. She’s to be my wife.”

Emily kept her face expressionless, not caring about what Tommy thought, but not wanting to anger the Shelby clan. “Evenin’.” She greeted bluntly, staring Tommy’s brothers down as they looked over her.

“Emily, these are my brothers: Arthur, John and his wife, Esme, and Finn,” Tommy gestured to each of them respectively, “Ada, my sister, and my aunt Polly,” He pointed to each woman, “that there is my cousin Michael, and over here we have Lizzy, our secretary.”

“The poor girl looks terrified.” An older woman in a dark blue dress spoke up from where she was sitting.

“Pol-,” Tommy began.

“No, ma'am, I’m not terrified actually. I’m just disgusted by your nephew’s barbaric behaviour. Now, can someone please escort me to my room?” Emily’s Cockney accent flooded her words.

Arthur volunteered and took one of her suitcases off his brother. He led her to a staircase and turned to look at her.

“I’m sorry about our Tommy’s behaviour.”

“But you’re Shelby’s. I thought you defended each other to the grave?” Emily asked in disbelief.

“Yes, well, there are sometimes exceptions. Like when my brother thinks with his cock and not his brain.”

“Well, from the stories I’ve heard, you’ve fallen victim to that once or twice yourself, Arthur Shelby. Come on, everyone’s fallen prey to their sexual desires at least once in their life. Anyway, can you take me to my room now, please?”


Emily sat on the king-size bed in her new bedroom, her gaze darting the between four framed photographs that lay on the sheets, as her fingers trailed over them.

Tommy entered the room looking tired and sullen. “Did you have to do that?” He questioned exasperated, referring to when she basically told on him to Aunt Polly.

“It’s was the truth,” Emily squeaked, tears coming to her eyes as she looked at an old photograph of a woman in her early 30s. “Can I put these on the dresser over there?” She asked, her voice breaking.

“Yes,” Tommy sighed, “as long as you tell me what’s wrong, and why this is such a bad situation.” Emily hummed quietly in agreement.

“Look, it’s not that I don’t find you attractive, okay, it’s just - Alfie promised me that I’d never have to sell myself again. He promised me, he said ‘you’ll never ‘ave to do it again, Em, never’ and he lied.” She hadn’t noticed the tears that had begun to cascade down her cheeks until Tommy softly wiped them away.

“You’ve sold yourself before?” He asked quietly, concern in his eyes.

“It’s was during the war. Alfie had gone off to fight.” She scoffed at herself, “I sound pathetic, don’t I? Needin’ my brother to protect me? Anyway, money was tight and Ma told me I was woman enough to provide for us.”

“Jesus. How old were you?”

“14. Sorry, Shelby, Alfie sold you damaged goods.” She whispered. He noticed suddenly that the light in her eyes had disappeared as soon as they left London.

Originally posted by museelo


Damon x Reader

You felt it before he’d even entered the building. The raw power that could only belong to him, all feeling of safety and confidence vanished and once you spotted him through the crowd, you hurried towards the stairs.

“Ah, where are we going?” Damon tutted as he stepped in front of you and you froze. “I was surprised when I heard about the party.”

“It is traditional.” You mumbled without holding his eye contact.

“So is retiring to your Sire’s side.” He pointed out and you shuffled your feet, smiling at people who stopped to congratulate you.

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Let’s make a baby part 11 D|H  {second part}

A/N : Like I announced yesterday here is the second half of part 11. This is literally what I’ve been waiting to post/write since the start of the series. If you cry let me know 

It was close to 2am as the three as of us entered the lounge of Phil’s flat. Water was dripping down Dan’s figure. His black clothes were stuck to his soaked through body like a second skin.

“You can sleep on the couch upstairs.” Phil explained and Dan nodded, thanking his friend.

But it was obvious that his gratitude was not actually directed towards him. Phil would have let him stay here in an instant. Like I said he was a sunshine, an angel. He was currently rushing to the bathroom to get some towels for his soaked mate.

“Y/N” Dan carefully spoke, my name rolling of his tongue. It was like music to my ears.

Being in his presence again made my heart beat faster.

“I know that last time didn’t end very well, but I wish I could explain all of the mess I made to you.”

I bit my lip, my thoughts were debating whether this was a good idea or not. There was a weak glimmer of hope in his eyes.

“Okay, I will listen.” I finally forced myself to say. His face instantly brightened up. Dan took a step towards me, after staring at me from across the room as if I was the most precious thing in this world.

“First of all I need to know if Boo is alright. I’ve been worried sick. I could never forgive myself if something happened to the little thing.” the words and concern broke out of him as he nervously ran his hands through his wet hair.

“Everything is fine. You don’t need to worry about us.” I simply answered, trying to remain cold and distant. I knew him well enough to know that he would still worry about everything.

“Y/N, I don’t know how to form the right words, but I’m crazy in love with you. You are my sun. Without you everything is dark and lifeless. If I have to, I will spend the rest of my days trying to win you back.”

I pressed my eyes close, a single tear slipped down my cheek.

“Yes, I lied to you when I said I was hanging out with Phil that day.”

My heart sunk down to my knees.

He seemed eager to continue as he say how my face fell.

“BUT I was NOT with a girl. I could never cheat on you. That’s not possible, literally no way.”

He swallowed hard. “I was- actually buying this.” he stuttered and reached into the pocket of his wet jacket. Before I knew what was going on he had pulled out a little scarlet box and went down on one knee in front of me.

I clasped my shaking hands over my mouth and started sobbing. Right in this moment Phil opened the door caring a ton of soft towels. He immediately froze in the middle of his tracks, totally taken aback by the scenery in front of him.

“I wanted to make a big secret out of it and as you accused me of cheating I got so scared. When I found my courage to ask you that one big question,you were already out of the door. I’m so stupid, I know. I hate myself so much because of that, but I need you to know that you mean the world to me.”

I was more than overwhelmed by all of this. My whole body was shaking. I had a hard time trying to breath normally. Boo was kicking like crazy inside of my belly, as if the little thing knew what was happening.

“The lady on the phone works at this fancy jewellery store down the road. I told her it should be surprise, that’s why she wanted to speak only to me. I’m sorry that it turned out to be this huge catastrophe. I guess I will never try to surprise you ever again.”

By know I had completely lost it. I just stood there in front of him and cried my eyes out, although a huge weight fell off my shoulders. I felt so relieved. ‘He does love me.’ I thought over and over again. It was like my body had lost the ability to feel extreme happiness in those couple past weeks because I just couldn’t stop crying. I loved that man that was currently kneeling at feet.

He opened the scarlet box that was clad with velvet and revealed a divine diamond ring. I was close to fainting as I gasped in awe.  

“This is like the worst timing in history. I’m not the kind of guy whose plans work out perfectly. I’m like a half moon or something, I don’t have everything figured out yet. But I know that I will never become whole without you. So instead of asking for you forgiveness, I’m asking you to spend the rest of your life with me. Y/N  Y/L/N, will you marry me ?”

I removed my hands from over my mouth to shout the word “Yes” on top of my lungs over and over again. Dan got up, happiness and relief radiating from his tall body. I wrapped my arms around him, so many emotions filled the room. It was unbearable. “Yes” I whispered again as I finally, after all this time, pressed my warm lips onto his cold ones.

Will You Ever Win [a Barry Allen AU] (Part 15)



| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 |

Barry is embarrassed. He just cried during sex and…well, he can’t get up to face you. Tears drip on the baby blue tiles, creating little puddles in the white cracks. His arms wrap around his knees, which are pressed against his chest; chin nuzzled his legs. He doesn’t want you to feel bad…oh, but here comes the waterworks again!

There’s a knock on the other side of the door. “Barry?” you whisper, slipping your pajama tank top back on. “Can I come in, baby?” Your ear presses to the wood, only hearing faint cries. It’s hurting, not knowing what exactly went on. A moment passes and then the doorknob turns, allowing you to enter.

With red blotchy eyes, Barry peeks up at you, eyelashes feeling heavy. Swallowing, he sucks in a breath, “I…I’m s-sorry… Ev-everything hap-pened s-so fa-ast and - and I-I-I…” he sobs, gulping, wet tears streaming down, “Wa-wanna be li-like th-at all the t-time… I wa…wanna b-be taken c-care of…” he admits, suddenly feeling extremely small.

Frowning, you bend down in front of him, hand caressing his hairy cheek. You stare into his soft green doe eyes. “Hey, hey, that’s okay for you to feel that way.” you coo, brushing back his messy locks. “Just tell me next time, baby boy, don’t run away.” you crack a smile, tilting his chin up; he sniffles. “What do you wanna do today?” you ask, thumb rubbing his scruff.

Barry pauses for a moment, sniffling and gazing around the tiny bathroom. Timidly, he points to his left, gulping, “C-can yo-you gi-ve me a b-bath? I-I kn…know I t-took one th-th-the oth-ther day, b-but…” he trails off, ducking his head in embarrassment. He feels like a damn child right n- Blinking, he hears the water splash, tub being plugged.

Quietly humming, you wait for the bathtub to fill up before adding some soap to the warm liquid. You hold your hand out for him, grinning when he takes it, standing on his knees beside you, rubbing his upturned nose. “Whenever you’re ready.” you nod, brushing your hair out of your face..

Slowly, he climbs into the water, sniffling and sitting. His legs are slightly spread, shoulders hunched. You squirt some shampoo in your hand, inhaling the strawberry scent before scratching his hair. His eyelids flutter shut, a sigh pushing past his lips. “Th-thanks…m-mommy…” he whispers, feeling your fingers rake through his hair. You scrunch your nose, dipping your index finger in the bubbles, collecting some and painting it on his chin; he giggles, bringing his shaky hand up to do the same.


Shaking the blow dryer, his damp locks flow back, your fingers running through them. He leans into the embrace, lips upturned into a gentle smile. “All your life you’ve never seen a woman taken by the wind…Would you stay if she promised you heaven…will you ever win…” you sing softly, readjusting your knees on the fluffy carpet, “Rhiannon….”

Sniffling, Barry curls his legs against his bare chest, calming down. He hums along with the lyrics, awkwardly stopping when the blow dryer shuts off. He didn’t want it to end. But, sadly, you turn your head to the side, waiting until there’s another knock on the door downstairs. A sigh wrecks through him and he shrugs a soft navy t-shirt over his fluffy hair. He’s not putting on pants.

The stairs creak as you pad down them. “M-mommy….” he says timidly, making you skid to a stop, “C…can we d-do so-so-something la-later?” he asks, frowning deeply into his scruff while he plays with the hem of his shirt. Ugh, this must be so awkward for you…

“Of course, baby boy.” you mumble, shooting him a grin. Your hand twists the doorknob, yanking it open; pajama bottoms swaying on your bare legs. “Cisco!” you beam, taking in the Meta Human CSI. “What’s up?” You step back, letting him walk through the doorway.

Cisco grins from ear to ear, keeping his hands tucked in his pockets of his tan pants. “Actually…” he trails off, spinning on the heel of his violet sneakers, peering up at Barry, who’s leaning on the wall. “I need your help.” he cringes, pointing at the other man and pulling a plastic baggy from his pocket. The dark purple button down moves around his galaxy cat t-shirt. “I…I need forensics advice. Julian is busy… please?” he begs, big brown eyes squinting above a forced smile.

No, no, he hasn’t done anything like that since… “I-I c… I c-ca-can’t…” Barry shakes his head, retracing his steps back up the stairs, “I…I-I’m s-sorry…” he mutters, blinking back tears. He won’t cry in front of people, he won’t.

“Can you just please look at it, please?” Cisco tries again, craning his neck as he steps forward. You keep yourself from sighing. You know he isn’t going to.

Barry shakes his head vigorously, pressing the back of his hand to the side of his mouth, hiding the scruff on his cheek. “I…I c-can’t!” he shouts, racing into the bedroom. Your heart drops, sighing slowly.

Slumping his shoulders, Cisco bites the inside of his cheek, turning to you. “I’m so sorry, I never meant to do that, I just…” he trails off, gulping. He feels so bad. He didn’t mean to push him that hard…

“It’s okay, Cisco.” you reassure, gripping his upper arm gently. “He…he’s having a tough time with…with everything. It’s not your fault, I swear.” you smile sadly, eyes bouncing towards the stairs.

He frowns but nods, “I understand.” he huffs, walking to the door, “It was a long shot, anyway.” he shrugs, “But, it was nice seeing you. I probably should get back to work.” he grumbles, shoving his hands in his pockets, sneakers bending on the edge of the door.

Nodding, you rest your body on the door, “You too, Cisco. See you around, hopefully.” you sigh, closing the door slowly. You let your palm press to the wood for a second before you venture upstairs. “Barr?” you call out, jogging to the bedroom. Your hand curls around the brass knob, jiggling it. Locked. “Barry, please!” you beg, trying the knob again. “Please don’t shut me out! Please!”

His body vibrates with sobs, but he manages to stand on wobbly legs, shuffling over to the door. Suddenly he feels dizzy. His palm slams hard on the wood, followed by his shoulder hitting the door frame. Sniffing, his hand spins the knob and there’s a click. When you enter, he doesn’t waste time falling in your arms, nose tucked over your shoulder. “I-I’m so-sorry, ‘m s-orry.” he repeats again and again.

Your mouth just touches his pale skin, worried eyes peering over his shoulder and arms wrapped around his torso, hands rubbing his back. “Shh, it’s okay, it’s okay…” you soothe, drowning out his whimpers.

Barry feels he’s in an earthquake; head spinning and chest tight, taking his breath away. Then, it all goes black and he feels limp.

Cold Hands

Pairing: Natsume/Tanuma

Words: 6.9k

Summary: There’s always been a wall. At first, Tanuma thought that with time and a little gentle persistence, he could pull it down. Or at least climb over it. Now he’s just wondering if it’s completely futile.


There’s always been a wall. At first, Tanuma thought that with time and a little gentle persistence, he could pull it down. Or at least climb over it. He always imagined the moment he would get to the other side, what it would be like. He liked to think it would feel warm and peaceful, like lying in the grass in the summertime, when the last of the sun rays paint the sky orange and fireflies begin to rise into the humid air and the first stars blink awake in the darkening twilight.

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