It’s alright, it’s gonna be hard but trust me when I say that you’ll be fine. It’s okay to think about them, it’s normal to be stuck on them so don’t be so frustrated when the first few months feel like a typhoon of emotions between what you want and what you need. That’s how it is, but just because it’s okay doesn’t mean you can choose to stay in that position. It’s only going to hurt you in the end so when I say that you’ve got to try and move on, please don’t hang your head and say that you can’t because you can, you just don’t want to. You don’t want to because you’re stuck on the idea that there could have been something more, that you haven’t heard the end of it, but sometimes there’s a limit to how much longer you can drag a situation out. In this case, the longer you try to hold on, the more it’s gonna hurt you. Glooming over negative situations can take so much out of you, trust me, I know. I know you’re afraid. Afraid of what comes after this, afraid for whether you’ll find someone else who you can love just as much as you loved them but you know something? You don’t love the same way twice. That’s as reassuring as it gets. They aren’t the last one, there’s so much more different types of love to come. 7 billion people in this world, don’t you dare tell me you’ll never love again. You can’t stay bitter about this forever. In the end you’ll realize that the only person holding you back is yourself.
—  to a friend, and to anybody struggling with moving on, you’re going to be okay.
Wait for it.
That day when you will be okay with what happened.
It may take weeks,
or months,
or years
but it will happen.
You could be getting your morning coffee
or driving home at night
and suddenly
that carefully constructed monument of him
that you built in your mind
will come crashing down.
You'll realize that he hurt you
in a way that made it impossible to breathe,
and that actually you know what?
It wasn't okay.
You'll realize that even though he seemed like it at the time,
even though he seemed like it for long after he left,
he was not your knight in shining armor.
You'll realize that
yes,
you loved him and he may have loved you,
and yes, 
his intentions were good and he never meant to hurt you,
and yes, 
he’s not a bad person 
but what is done is done.
Keep your reasons why you fell in love with him
and remember them,
but never forget how he made you feel
when he left.
It wasn't noble,
it wasn't romantic,
and you were not star-crossed lovers.
He could have stayed,
he could have not done what he did
if he wanted to
but the fact is that he didn’t 
and finally,
finally
it’s okay.
He broke you
but you can finally forgive him
and most importantly,
you will realize that there’s nothing to go back to
but hurt
and a boy who couldn’t keep his promises.
I will keep my promise to you reader.
I promise this day will come,
and I promise it will make you smile,
and I promise there’s a reason
why you felt so much pain
for so long.
Wait for it.
—  free from you

I know that this won’t hurt one day. I know that heartbreak isn’t forever. I know that this all just takes time and that in a year none of it will matter to me at all.

But for right now, in this moment, it hurts. It hurts a whole hell of a lot, more than I’d like it to. And I know it will keep hurting, and that my heart will break itself over and over again until I won’t know what to do with myself.  But I know that I’ll be okay one day. That day just isn’t today.

Today, I need to let my heart tear itself apart. I need to release all of the pain built up inside of me, and I need to scream and cry and feel every single possible emotion that comes along with a broken heart. 

And soon enough, I’ll be okay. I know I’ll get there someday. Just not today.

—  time heals. it heals slowly, but it heals. // excerpt from a book i’ll never write #102