Cronkri <>
Cameron, Sam

[Kankri is heard huffing in annoyance, footsteps falling quickly.]
C: kankri, come on! vwhats the big deal? [He groans lowly and his footsteps join Kankri’s.] i just said it vwas ridiculous.

K: Exactly! Cr9nus, y9u seem t9 n9t understand the imp9rtance and seri9usness 9f triggers. I have l9st c9unt 9f h9w many times I have t9ld n9t 9nly y9u, 6ut the rest 9f 9ur sessi9n that t9uching 9thers with9ut c9nsent is a deep invasi9n 9f privacy and can 6ring up unpleasant mem9ries f9r certain parties. I pers9nally hate it 6ecause-

C: look, its not exactly like youre going to die if i lean on you a little to say hello. you nevwer seemed to mind me slapping you on the back before.

K: [Muttering] Y9u never listened t9 my pr9tests.

C: regardless, isnt it a bit silly to get so uppity about this? i vwont do it again, and you knowv me. i keep my vword! [Kankri scoffs.] vwhat? you doubting me?

K: Perhaps I am. What are y9u t9 d9 a69ut it?

C: im to tell you to not doubt me. i can be serious at times. [Cronus laughs, but it faulters under Kankri’s stare.] okay, not a lot but still, im knowvn to pull my head out of my ass enough to notice things. i dont hit on you, youvwe made it clear you arent interested.

K: N9w 9nly if y9u extended that kn9wledge t9 the 9thers. Y9u 9nly d9n’t, as y9u s9 crudely put it, “hit 9n me” 6ecause y9u kn9w I am celi6ate and I w9uld n9t return y9ur insistent-

C: [Cuts Kankri off; mocking tone in the quoted section.] yeah yeah, “Y9u are a h9rri6le example f9r y9ung tr9lls in r9mance”, savwe it kan.

K: If I am t9 save it, then y9u are t9 learn s9me manners. I am free later t9 teach y9u h9w t9 c9nduct y9urself in a rati9nal manner. It is 9nly my duty as y9ur unapp9inted m9irail, if I am t9 thr9w quadrants ar9und as P9rrim d9es, t9 teach y9u h9w t9 6ehave in s9cial interacti9ns- [Deadpans] what are y9u d9ing?

C: blocking out the nonsense and listening for compliments. its a skill ivwe perfected since knowving you, kan.

K: Kankri, Cr9nus. My name is Kankri and I w9uld prefer y9u n9t pull a P9rrim and call me silly little nicknames. C9mpletely ill9gical and pathetic, frankly. I hate nicknames.

C: [Muttering] if its “kankers” from latula, you dont.

K: Cr9nus! [Opens his mouth to counter, but Cronus’s laughter cuts him off and he resigns to a groan.] I regret ever menti9ning that t9 y9u. Hell, I didn’t even menti9n it t9 y9u, y9u dragged it screaming 9ut 9f me.

C: its a talent. nowv, you forgivwe me for the touching thing?

K: Regretfully. Can we m9ve 9n 6ef9re y9u find s9mething else t9 ann9y me with?
[Footsteps falling in sync, fading.]

A Script writen by our scriptor Kira! Thank you very much, Kira!!

Kankri - Cameron

Cronus - Sam

Editor - Jess