lets go to sleep

So it’s 5 AM and I can’t sleep so let’s just go ahead an write this damn thing.

Sheldon Cooper: A prime example of character development.

NOTE: I’m so sorry if it takes forever to load all the gifs accompanying this gigantic text post but they’re necessary to illustrate my point perfectly and remove any possible ambiguity that might get me in trouble with anon h8ers (and also, the gifs make it more interesting). If necessary just let this page load for a few minutes in the background. Anyway, let’s begin:

So, I love this character. As most people do. I remember in.. 2007/8 when this show first came out and all people talked about at my school was Sheldon. Maybe a little bit about Howard but mostly Sheldon.
He was, and in many ways, still is, such an unlikely likable character. For real, like, imagine reading this character, before seeing Jim playing him. He’s a dick. But somehow, and I don’t think we’ll ever know why, we all love him. We feel this strange sympathy for him.

I attribute a lot of that to Jim Parsons’ adorableness.

I mean look at HIM. But we’re not here to talk about that.

We’re here to talk about how he went from being this guy, who hated relationships and had no interest in other human beings

to becoming this guy.

Because I remember very well how everyone was so apprehensive about the idea of Sheldon having a love interest back in season 3.

Almost as much apprehension as we feel about the Sheldon spin off right now, am I rite? *high fives u* Ok, sorry.
I’m gonna try to explain, or describe how I think the writers pulled this off. And you’re entitled to disagree with me, ok? This is just my opinion.

I think the writers of this show are geniuses, a little bit. Not because they write science jokes, because it’s barely about that anymore. But because they found a way to develop a character who seemed 1000000% the most unlikely to ever change in any way.

Let’s look at Season ½/3 Sheldon for a second.

He’s a germaphobe.

He doesn’t even like human company.

He disagrees with everyone.

He’s (as far as we know) asexual.

Best part, he’s 100% clueless.


Even when a girl shows interest in him, he doesn’t realize it

Or a guy.

It was funny, yes, but then the news came out that Sheldon was going to have a love interest

And we all wondered how the hell that was going to work.
This is how they made it work: They brought in a character that was exactly like Sheldon.
Despised physical contact.

Only went out with him to please his mother

Was just as smart as him.

Had the same interests as him.

But the best part about Amy was.. She did not seem as much into Sheldon as Sheldon was into her.

I loved that. Because it seemed so unlikely. I think most of us have forgotten this. Because the way they played it in every other season after season 4, it was the other way around, but not at first.

Amy seemed mostly unfazed by Sheldon.

At least from a relationship point of view.

It would’ve been so much easier for these writers to have this girl be into Sheldon and Sheldon not into her at all but then Sheldon could’ve never fallen for anyone like that, because we remember how that Ramona business turned out, right?

So of course, he liked her more.

He got a bunch of cats after a fight that ended their “relationship” (their words, not mine).

He asked her out and she turned him down

He got jealous of Leonard

He liked her kisses.

But the part that remained very true to the character we all knew and loved was that he denied all of it. That was what still made him very Sheldon. The Sheldon we all loved.

He denied jealousy

He let go of her hand after grabbing it.

He denied being hurt

He denied her being more than a friend.

Meanwhile Amy was just there… a bit of a mystery. Both to us, and Sheldon. Until we got to know her a little bit
She became her own character and she.. had desires.

The roles reversed but Sheldon could not let go of her at this point. He was already so into her.

She kissed him and he pretended like it never happened. But it did.

And this is something we’ve come to see from this couple over and over again, and I suspect its the reason why we’re all oddly ok with Sheldon being the way he is today, compared to what he was then.
They dragged things out
It got to the point where we were all screaming at our TV screens, GOD, JUST ASK HER TO BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!!!!!1
It got to the point where Sheldon just couldn’t deny his own feelings anymore.

He had to ask her out.

He had to apologize when he was wrong.

He had to allow himself to love her.

And boy, that took a while.

But Amy always found ways, because she’s THE BEST.

So patient, so loving, so understanding.

Because she was Sheldon at some point, right?

She knew what he was going through.

And yet another great example of the writers dragging things out like crazy.
Even “Sheldon initiated kiss” (SIK) was a thing on tumblr. I remember the 1000 fanfics written about how a SIK could happen. It was our #1 dream

And let’s all face it, season 6 was a major disappointment. Not only did we not get our SIK, but Sheldon was just… a dick this season.

But we got a cute hug

And Sheldon kinda admitted how much Amy meant to him 

So we decided to forget about it and hope the season 7 was the year of the SIK

But before we get into that, let’s look at how much they dragged things out, shall we?




That last one was honestly just brutal.

I think all of us shamy shippers would’ve been ok if they just kissed whenever. We would’ve been fine with anything as long as he kissed her on the lips, but the writers probably struggled with the “everyday, normal, general, casual viewer” who doesn’t write huge essays like this one.

And it was so perfect man, I remember watching that scene, I almost had a heart attack.

I remember so very clearly when this scene came out and some Shamy haters (yes they exist, omg) were like “EVERYONES TALKING ABOUT HOW PERFECT IT WAS BUT ANY SCENE WOULD’VE PLEASED U GUYS” and I was like, yeah, thats true but.



it. was. so. perfect.

Let me tell you why, this episode begins with this scene: Sheldon, once again, suppressing his feelings. He counts down until he no longer feels the need to hug her.

And he’s so betrayed when he finds out Amy was hoping for some romance, cause he does NOT enjoy romance. He tries to make a point.

But now his own body betrays him.

It’s also perfect because this isn’t like every other time where Sheldon’s actions are completely misaligned with what he says. He’s not denying something, he’s just doing it. And he doesn’t ever try to deny it.

Let’s look at Sheldon with the cats once again.

He’s clearly struggling, while saying he’s not pining over anyone.

But kissing, he’s never talked about kissing. He’s never been in a position where he really wanted to kiss her and did it but then denied it.

This, somehow, has never occurred before. 3 years in and this has never happened

And now it does, and he so clearly loves it, and he never, ever. Not even the day after, tries to deny how much it meant to him.

This, ladies gentlemen, is when Sheldon realizes he’s in love.

And he sooo wants to kiss her again, but he doesn’t do it.

Instead he adds it to the relationship agreement, of course. And he’s so willing man, it’s beautiful.

Of course he doesn’t admit he’s in love ’til a year later, but that’s how much we have to drag it out right?

And now that he’s said it, he doesn’t have to hide it anymore.

This guy is just so in love

It’s beautiful. We’re all so happy

and Amy too, and she starts to think that maybe that means Sheldon’s ready for a little bit more.

But he’s not, and that hits her like a damn truck.

She has to break up, patience’s run out, she needs some time off.

And Sheldon knew what had happened. Amy was disappointed because he wasn’t thinking about sex, so he thinks it’s the coitus part that made Amy want to break up.

I’ve said this 10 thousand times already but I love that look (JIM YOU DESERVE EVERY EMMY). It’s such a small, 2 second shot but it shows exactly his thoughts this whole time.

He thinks Amy broke up with him because of the lack of coitus, but it wasn’t that. It was so much more than that.

Listen to Jim and Mayim if you don’t believe me.

This whole episode was so clearly a set up to them getting back together.

They’re back to season 4 Shamy. They’re playing games, admiring each other.


And the end hit US (and Amy) like a damn truck now.

Sheldon was so hurt, he didn’t want to go through all that pain again. He decides he’d rather have Amy as a friend, now that he sees it as a possibility, rather than risk getting his heart broken again.

But then, he comes to a great realization. Amy’s only made him better since they met.

He realizes he is, once again, denying his own feelings.

To hell with that, they’re back together, and this time, for real.

Yes, that means coitus, too. And once again we all went.. “how the hell is that gonna work”. This is probably the first time, since Amy’s arrival, when something happened when we were not expecting it.

They didn’t really drag this out, I mean, in a way, they did cause it’s already been 5 years since Amy’s introduction but also.. not so much. They’d just gotten back together, and we’d all probably thought that 2 kisses were supposed to hold us for a while.

And coitus happened.
Something I mysteriously haven’t talked about yet, is why this couple is so appealing to so many people.
In part it’s beautiful because of Sheldon’s development, yes, but also because Sheldon and Amy are each other’s 1st love. It seems so unlikely that two people would find love for the first time in their 30s, but that’s exactly what this relationship is.

This is the first time for both of them, and I’m not talking about virginity, no. I’m talking about first time falling for someone. Watching that is so beautiful. It’s one of the best parts about this couple. It brings out a familiar feeling for all of us.

Same with them losing their virginity, it wasn’t about “oooh, Sheldon’s a stud in bed!!”, it’s about, being nervous, anxious…

But ultimately knowing it’s the right time because you love this person and know them and trust them.

It’s again, so unlikely that Amy would be the one having doubts and being nervous right before it happens, and Sheldon’s so calm and sure that this is right.

But that made it all the more beautiful for us, didn’t it?

And yes he’s a genius in bed, too. Period.

Now there’s nothing really holding them back. Coitus only once a year, sure, but that’s it.

Sheldon makes mistakes, and denies his own feelings sometimes but he’s matured enough to realize it and apologize for it, but more than that, he makes adjustments for Amy.

He moves in with her,

adjusts his lifestyle for her

he makes a real effort

Something Amy’s been doing for years now, he’s finally doing it for her.

And, as I’ve said 10 thousand times already, it’s BEAUTIFUL.

And finally, to end this extremely long text post, my favorite headcanon about this couple has always been how Amy is the ONLY person that could’ve made this happen for Sheldon.

She’s the only woman he’d ever want to date, be intimate with, kiss, etc.
She’s the only one he could fall for. And I’ll be honest, I was never really sure that that was really canon on the show. Until season 10, episode 24 happened.

And it sucked seeing Sheldon enjoying somebody else’s company so much, even though he obviously did not enjoy it as more than a friendship, but

when Ramona kisses him, he realizes Amy’s the only person he ever wants to be with. It’s canon now, bitches!

Amy’s the only one.

Sleepless nights

No fun when the person you are used to being right next to you isn’t here. I mean I know the reason and sure I’ll see him soon enough but geez it’s so freaking hard to sleep without him here or next to me. It’s like my anxiety has taken over and just refuses to let me sleep at all. I just keep going until I finally pass out which of course is when I’m expected to be doing anything and everything. I’m losing my mind and this just keeps happening. Im so used to his arms around me or cuddling up behind him. Geez why does this sleep thing have to just take over. I can’t seem to relax at all. I don’t really get this part of life when I can’t calm down, relax and finally fall asleep. No my system decides to run on pure adrenaline. All I can do is keep pushing forward.

Originally posted by raceyalexander

CP problems

When your body is tried but your mind is not. This has WAS been a problem since I was little. I think it’s a thing with my cp because my parents say that even when I was little I couldn’t sleep . Let’s see what time I go to bed tonight . Last night your girl when to bed at 4 am and woke up at 10:30 ( I stayed in bed watching YouTube videos for a little bit ) only because my mom had to drive my sister to work.

the worst nightmares are the ones that feel like they drag on for days but you wake up only a half hour since you went to bed. and they come with physical sensation that makes you feel freezing cold and waves of pressure all over your body. and they target the most innocent parts of your life. like your cats. and they just don’t let up. and you’re left terrified to go back to sleep because guess what’s waiting there?

Life Update7/27/17

The last couple of weeks have been a shit storm. A couple weeks ago P went to jail again because a cop rolled up on him doing a rinse and they counted it as doing drugs in public even though there was no actual drugs, he was just rinsing cottons trying to stay well, it was 5 am and no one was around to see, and myself and our dog were dead asleep so he wasn’t paying attention to his surroundings and I was sleeping so obviously I wasn’t keeping watch either. Next thing I know I wake up to him talking to the cops trying to explain that he has no real drugs on him, the cops said something like “That’s a rinse huh? Well what’s a rinse for? Getting well! Exactly what you would be using heroin for. A rinse comes from heroin and you’re doing it out here in public!” They let me and my dog Poppy go because they could see I was sleeping and had no part in what he was doing and they hauled him away until he got released two days later.

Since then not much has changed. I’m still on the streets homeless except I’m going to appointments desperately trying to get housing for my little family of three before winter time comes around and freezes my little pup to death.

A lot of people ask me to help them get shit, and I don’t mind helping chill people, but a lot of times they get mad at me if something doesn’t work out like one of my dealers doesn’t respond or says they need to reup and so we end up having to reschedule for another day, or if my phone dies and I don’t respond till an hour from then. Like I’m fucking homeless, my phone dies on me all the time and it’s not always easy finding some place to charge it so there’s going to be gaps in between my responses sometimes. Or if it does work out they get pissy that I want compensation for it. Why would someone do a felony for free? Ya feel me? It’s just something that’s been annoying me lately. I wish people would put themselves in my shoes and stop being so selfish.

On the bright side today marks 4 months that I’ve had my dog Poppy, so P and I got her a pet bed that looks like a sunflower. It’s so cute watching her sleep in it. She curls up in the middle of it and she looks like the brown part of the flower while the yellow petals stick out around her. I love this little dog so much man. She’s an angel.

I’m debating on what to do the rest of tonight. Idk if I should go panhandle and make some more money before the morning, or if I should go do the little bit of dope that I have left and go to sleep. I’m so tired and stressed and I just want a good shot and some sleep.

I’ll start posting more on here again soon.

I hope all of you guys are being safe out there, wherever you are in your lives and addictions.

Stay up. ♡

Making Plans

Odessii arrived home late, tired from the day’s events. She still wasn’t entirely fine emotionally - being told one of her children was to become a ward for another, even one that Ode trusted to keep Chloe safe… It pained her to think about. All she wanted was to wake Chloe, to spend every waking minute with the girl. But she couldn’t come off as though everything were wrong - she couldn’t act like she felt, like their worlds were going to be changing so drastically. She’d let Chloe sleep… And start making the most of her time tomorrow.

Her heart twinged, though - and she couldn’t sleep. Her thoughts drifted aimlessly, and finally she landed on a person she needed to reach out to. So much was uncertain in her life - she needed certainty in something, and she would seek it out. Or… At least, she would try - start in that direction.

She moved into her office, taking up a pen and pulling a parchment onto her desk, setting to work writing.

“My Lord Ellis Addington,”

No, that seemed too… Possessive, maybe. Too much like there was already something there that may not be…


No, too familiar. Far too familiar. She tossed both papers aside before grabbing a fresh one, taking a breath and setting to work on a proper note.

“Lord Addington,

I’m sorry for not getting in touch with you sooner, I’ve meant to since your sisters’ birthday. I cut short our conversation that might, and I was hoping to make up for that. To continue our talk, as you said, over a drink somewhere with less prying eyes and ears. I feel there’s a lot we could, and should, talk about - so if you’re interested, all I need is a time and place, though I’ll be preoccupied for the next week. I look forward to seeing you again, my Lord - even if we won’t be dancing this time.

       Odessii Dragonblade”

(( @light-finds-a-way and @jossetta​ for vague mentions, and @renlavaye because he ships this so hard. *thumbs up* ))

can’t sleep can’t sleep can’t sleep!! can hear very loud snores and my own heart thumping!! AHHHHHHHH!!!! I need to function for work tomorrow or else I’m getting fired I’m stressed but I need to let it go and sleep I’m up in a few hours and I’m going to die of exhaustion!!


Let Go For Tonight 
-by Foxes

Fell from the sky, 
we fell from the sky and started walking
leaving our footprints on the ground.

It might be a prayer,
or maybe a piece of conversation. 
Wherever we go, we make a sound. 

So I call your name, the only thing I know
is I need you here or you’ll be gone forever.
All that I know, all that I know is we’re here tonight! 

Turn off the lights!

Let go for tonight baby, 
Let love in your life and be shown.
Turn off the lights!
Let go for tonight baby,
who needs sleep tonight?
I need to let go!
let go! 
Let go, let go!
Turn off the lights!

Let love in your life baby,
who needs sleep tonight?

I wanna drive. 
I wanna drive into the open
looking for reasons I can’t find.

So I call your name, the only thing I know
is I need you here or you’ll be gone forever.
All that I know, all that I know is we’re here tonight!

Turn off the lights!

Let go for tonight baby,
Let love in your life and be shown.
Turn off the lights!
Let go for tonight baby,
who needs sleep tonight?
I need to let go!
let go!
Let go, let go!
Turn off the lights!

Let love in your life baby,
who needs sleep tonight?

I need to let go, let go! 
Let go, let go!
I need to let go, let go !
Before we’re gone, gone, gone- 

So I call your name, the only thing I know
is I need you here or you’ll be gone forever.
All that I know, all that I know
is I need you here or you’ll be gone, forever!

Turn off the lights!

Turn off the lights!
Let go for tonight baby. 
Let love in your life and be shown.
Turn off the lights!

Let go for tonight baby,
who needs sleep tonight?
I need to let go, let go! 
Let go, let go!
Turn off the lights!

Let love in your life baby,
who needs sleep tonight?

I need to let go, let go. 
Let go, let go. 
I need to let go, let go.
Before we’re gone, gone gone- 

Fell from the sky.
We fell from the sky and started walking, 
leaving our footprints on the ground.


Originally posted by nikifurov

Please God can I sleep now?

I’ve never done one of these but why not :) thanks for tagging me @itzcatie

Rules: answer the 20 questions and tag 20 amazing followers you would like to get to know better.

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A Letter To The Girl After Me

Let me just start off by saying, you have some very good taste and you probably already know that you are a very lucky girl. This kid is always going to be there for you no matter what, and i think that’s one of the best qualities about him. No matter what he has going on, he will always put you before himself. He has a hard time trying to get to bed at night so if, for some wild miracle, he says he’s going to go to bed early, let him, he needs the sleep. On the normal nights, he will probably be up past 4 in the morning and will wake up somewhere in the afternoon. He is one of the most caring people I have ever met in my life. He has a great family, and a great heart. If he asks you if you want to hang out, please do not hesitate to say yes, no matter what you do i promise that just being around him will make the time worth while. He is pretty picky when it come to food but he loves taco bell. He is very passionate about what he does. He can be very hard on himself so please just remind him of how great he really is, he doesn’t deserve to feel shitty. He isn’t always the most confident in the way he looks but just reassure him that he looks amazing. He loves his family to death, it’s his family over everything. His friends also mean the world to him. Please, do not try to control his life by telling him who he can and can’t hang out with, first of all, he won’t listen to you, secondly, his intentions are never in bad light..he won’t try to control you either, he believes that you are mature enough to handle yourself and make the right decisions. He will shower you in compliments, make sure you return the favor. If their comes a time where he ends things, try not to be too upset, and even if you are, try not to let him know how much it really effected you, it will just make him feel worse about it. Don’t try to guilt him into staying with you, let him do his own thing. If at some point life decides to throw you back together, then by all means, take your chance if you want it. He likes to leave things on good terms, and he’s won’t do anything to intentionally hurt you. No matter what happens, always be there for him and let him know that. He deserves so much more than he thinks he does, so, to whoever comes after me, treat him like the most precious thing in the world, because he’s damn near close to it.