let him date if he wants!!!!

Cargo Car Confessions

Day 1: October 15 -First Time-

Summary: When Kenny ditches his bad date he relies on Stan and weed to make him feel better, even if that required them sharing embarrassing confessions and perhaps a kiss.

I’m so excited for @stenny-week and in some places it’s October 15th already so i wanted to post early! Please enjoy!

Stan had just stolen the ball from Cartman, blocking him from behind as he clutched the ball in his chest before thrusting it forward in a successful pass. Kyle caught the ball with ease— that was just one of the many perks to being on the basketball team— then he jumped off his back foot to slam dunk the ball into the hoop. The force of the dunk caused the hoop to shutter. it loosened the black sticky tape used to keep the hoop together after years of abuse and neglect.

“This is bullshit!” Cartman huffed with a healthy sheen of sweat coating his face, giving him the appearance of grease-soaked tomato.

“Sorry, dude. We won.” Stan stopped the ball with his foot then picked it up with his hands. Kyle did his winning trot towards Stan, holding his hand out for a high five, “good job, man.”

Cartman wasn’t done with his childish protest, “well!” He began, searching for the words he wanted to say before stammering at the two pairs of eyes staring at him, “well…” again, he struggled, wishing Kenny was here to back him up.

“It’s not a fair game because Kenny isn’t here!” A-ha, he got them now. Kyle and Stan moved over to the bench where Kyle dabbed his forehead and neck with the towel he brought with him. Stan tossed him an extra Gatorade.

“Kenny’s not here because he’s on a date.”

“Exactly, which means we’re down a player, which also means it’s not fair game.”

Stan and Kyle exchanged a look.

“Whatever, dude.”

“Ya know what, screw you guys! I’m going home!” Was Cartman’s declaration. He kicked aside an empty can of beer left by either upperclassmen or a drunken adult. It was hard to tell nowadays.

Kyle rolled his eyes, pushing up a stack of curls that have fallen from his loose bun, “you can’t go home, fatass, all of our shit is at your house.”

“Can’t hear you! I’m busy going home, you gaywads!”

Stan felt three pulses from his pocket, ignoring his friends bickering to divert his attention to the texts he was receiving. His body shifted sideways on the bench, heart racing with excitement as he half expected the texts to be from Wendy. Perhaps she wanted to get back together even though they broke up in middle school. She made it clear that she had no intention of being his boyfriend, even going out with Token of all people, until he suddenly had some sexual awakening; realizing he would rather suck dick instead of being with one of the hottest girls in school.

He rolled his eyes hard, taking on one of Kyle’s many mannerisms as he recalled past events. Cartman and Kyle’s idle chatter sounded nothing more than muffled sounds— like someone yelling behind a thick glass. Stan unlocked his phone.

Kenny: Hey, man, you busy?

Kenny: wanna meet me at our spot?

Kenny: nvm, ur probs with Kyle and Cartfuck—

A quiet chuckle escaped Stan’s parted lips. He continued to read the text:

Kenny: — u know where I am. Ps. I got weed ;)

His eyes glossed over those messages more times then Stan could count, “Stan? Stan? What the hell are you smiling at? It’s kinda creepy.”

Kyle was left standing in front of him with a slight concern dampening his features. The towel he’d previously used now slung around his neck, pale and covered with speckles of faint brown freckles.

“Uh…” Stan licked his lips, contemplating an excuse he could tell his best friend and have it sound believable. They knew each other like the back of their hands. Literally. He pocketed his phone, rubbing sweaty palms on his sweats.

The weather in South Park had been warmer than usual considering it was the middle of October. While Halloween decor met the eyes of anyone passing through their neighborhood, some houses started early with stabbing turkey and pilgrim lawn ornaments in their front yards. Global warming, said Randy like a scratched record over their dreaded dinners. According to him, it was real and ready to fuck us raw in the ass.

Kyle tapped his foot impatiently for an answer, hands resting subconsciously on his hips. His posture resembling one of his mothers when she was about to scowl them. Stan snorted.

“I gotta go, uh, my sister wants me to pick her up a box of tampons?” As he spoke aloud it sounded more ridiculous then it had in his head. What the hell, Stan? Your sisters in college you dumb fuck.

“She’s back for Halloweengivings… My parents thought it would be better to combine both holidays. Nothing better than carving a pumpkin and shoveling down cranberry sauce.”

Kyle blinked, “Uh, okay?”

“Great!” Stan shot up from his seat, giving Kyle a pat on the shoulder, “I’ll text you later, dude!”

He walked with a quickened pace, afraid that Kyle would try to stop him for questions. Sometimes he nagged more than he realized, even though he was only trying to be a good friend. A rain of guilt washed over Stan for lying to Kyle. He lied before. Plenty of times actually.

Once safely around the corner of the block, Stan made haste to Kenny doing god knows what by himself when he was supposed to be on his date with Tammy. Without a doubt she was hot, returning to South Park after moving to California. When she returned she developed an ego bigger than Cartman’s ass, along with an attitude comparing to none of the other girls in their grade. California changes people. Too bad she was still a slut.

At least that’s what the girls said.

Stan slowed his walking. He sniffed the burning grass as he approached their spot— the abandoned railway just minutes away from Kenny’s house. Tilting his head up at one of the many cargo cars rusted from years of weather damaged, he recognized the graffiti drawn on the sides. As well as the smell.

“You got a head start without me, asshole?” His voice echoed through the abandoned field of cars, picking up a rock to chuck at the rusted door. It bounced off the metal with a loud hallowed clink.

“Stan the man.” Kenny pulled the door aside, greeting his friend with widespread arms. Stan felt his heart thump.

“Move aside.” He hoisted his body up, then knee crawled over to his respective end of the car. Stan knocked aside the junk they collected; consisting of empty bottles of wine stolen from his dad, single cans of beer Kenny snagged from Kevin’s pack which steadily grew into a rather nice collection for them, darts, slingshots, and a bunch of other shit.

Kenny closed the door after Stan was in. Instead of relying on the crack of light from the setting sun, the inside of the car was illuminated with a string of Christmas lights connected to a lengthy power cord hooked up to Kenny’s house. Together they had made the perfect “man” cave.  

“I thought you were on a date,” Stan said, knees hugging his chest as if he was intruding in the space they created together. Those nauseating butterflies returned to flutter around his stomach.

“I was, then I left.” Kenny passed over the joint sloppily rolled together as if he had done it halfheartedly to quickly get the relief he desired. Stan was no expert at rolling anything. Even he knew it wasn’t his best work.

Kenny hooked a section of his sandy blonde hair behind his ear, exposing the multiple piercings neatly aligned on his outer lobe. He’s done all his piercings himself. Stan bummed off the joint. He attempted to quiet his mind from the indirect kiss from Kenny by smoking it out with the burning kush.

“She’s a bitch. There’s a big difference between being with her to get my dick sucked and actually pursuing a relationship.” Kenny spoke with a bitterness behind his words, “I don’t know. I thought it would be easier to ask her out considering we had a thing before. She’s changed.”

Stan shrugged, slouching back with eased muscles as the joint burned slowly between his fingers, “so you text me?”

A lopsided grin stretched across Kenny’s face, showing off the tooth missing from an accident he had when they were kids and crooked teeth unfixed from his families lack of money to get him braces.

“Of course! You’re my best friend after all. Besides, you wouldn’t judge me like Kyle would.”

“Yeah…” Stan’s voice trailed, eyes following the posters they tapped on the car walls, “he can’t help himself.”

“Yeah, he really can’t.”

They sat in the comfortable silence they created, the two of them passing the blunt back and forth until it became roach and they could no longer smoke it. Their minds were hazed yet relaxed. Nowadays drugs were the only thing able to ease their teenage minds from the angst and stress. Stan found this to be his only escape from the suffering thoughts thanks to his depression and anxiety. Kenny smoked for his own reasons. He just wanted to chill from time to time.

“I thought you were Wendy.” He spoke slow and a bit sluggish, tongue untied and free.

“I thought you were over her, man. She’s no good for you.”

“I love her…” Stan admitted, clutching the fabric on his grey sweats between his hands. He still loved her, he always will.

Kenny spun the dart between his fingers, eyes locked on the boy across from him.

“I could… distract you.” His offer did not go without the flush of red spreading across his cheeks.

“I’m not… I’m not gay.” Stan’s throat tightened and suffocated his words.

“Neither am I… I mean… I think everyone is hot. Guys, Girls, and those in between.” Kenny admitted, crawling over towards Stan to take a seat next to him. They were close enough in the cargo car that Stan could smell the scent of aftershave emitting from Kenny’s body. He felt his stomach twist and turn at two things. Kenny’s confession and the fact they were so close to one another.

He was hot, funny, and Stan could always be himself around him. Instead of Kenny judging or trying to diagnosis his problems like Kyle, Wendy, or his parents, he was allowed to rant and cry out of frustration. They related to each other. Their lives at home sucked just as bad as their friends.

Stan was not gay. From what he knew he was straight with only a few gay mishaps. An embarrassing mishap being the time he got a boner during a sleepover at Kyle’s house. He accidentally walked in on him changing and caught a glimpse of everything. They swore to never speak of it for the sake of not making their sleepover painfully awkward, but Stan could not shake the mental image from his mind as he used his imagination to relieve himself once Kyle had fallen asleep.

Then there was that one time when he was still on the football team and they traveled to Denver to play against their best high school team. He was sharing a room with Craig, Clyde, and Token— to his utter despair since they only spoke in inside jokes which made Stan feel like an outsider. Stan discovered a gay magazine that must have fallen out of one of their bags. While they were fucking around in the pool he stayed behind in the room and allowed his curiosity to roam. He liked what he saw.

Kenny inched closer, resting a hand on Stan’s thigh but doing nothing more because he did not want to do anything if Stan wasn’t comfortable. He did like Stan. A lot.

In those seconds they both sobered up, blue eyes meeting a mysterious purple, adding to the many features Stan loved about him.

“I- I never kissed a guy before.”

Kenny chuckled, “it’s just like kissing a girl, except… Girls taste sweeter. Sort of like fruit because they wear chapstick and shit. Except for Craig-”

“Wait, you kissed Craig?” Stan questioned in disbelief. The weird competition he and Craig had with one another flaring like a newly lit flame ignited from jealousy.

“Spin the bottle. He tasted like a fucking fruitcake.”

Stan chewed on his lower lip. “Since we’re confessing I only kissed Wendy once… And Kyle. We practiced on each other when we were kids.”

“I thought you said you never kissed a guy?”

“T-That doesn’t count! We’re like super best friends so it wasn’t a real kiss!” Stan felt himself get defensive, not appreciating the skeptical looks Kenny was giving him. It was completely normal and not gay for friends to practice on one another.

“Chill, I’m joking-“

Stan silenced him with a kiss. Tensions melted away at the contact of their lips. Kenny tasted as sweet as old candy, also weed. Creating a strange yet familiar flavor. His tongue swept the bottom of his lip, making Stan look more confident than what he was.

Kenny pressed in, moving his tongue around for an entrance into his mouth. Their kiss was sloppy, awkward— because of the angle they were in— but exhilarating.

When they pulled apart for air, Stan was as winded as he was during his game with Kyle and Cartman. He had never experienced a kiss quite like that.

“How was I…?” What else could he say? He and Kenny just kissed for fucksake! Was he going to say thank you?

“Kissing Kyle really helped.” Kenny joked, nearly falling to his side from the playful shove from Stan.

“You weren’t so bad either. That was like my first real kiss, dude, so I guess you took my kissing virginity.”

“You’re so lame.”

Stan flipped him off, hugging his body with his hands. He just kissed Kenny. Him and Kenny, lips locked, in full make out. What were they now?

“You okay?” Kenny pried one of Stans’ hands out from his weird human arm wrap, playing with his fingers before sliding his own in between. There was no way he could know how Stan feels now but he only dreamed about being his boyfriend, fantasizing about the pathetic crush he had since they were 13 years old.

“So are we dating?” Stan blurted. He was unable to look at Kenny’s eyes just in case he said no or something else which might break his heart for the second time.

“I would say we are… if you want too. We don’t have to tell the guys yet if you’re not ready.”

“So…” his tone a childlike whisper, “I guess this means I’m gay? Do I have to have, like, a big coming out party.”

Kenny smiled, “you don’t have to put a label on everything. Look at me. Who cares if you’re straight, gay, or bi. Be with whoever makes you happy.”

Stan nodded. He unraveled from his hold around his body to lean into Kenny, holding his hand tight. Right now he didn’t want to think. He just wanted to close his eyes and enjoy the moment.

“I’m going to punch Craig for kissing you, I hope you know that.” He murmured, knocking his shoe against Kenny’s.

“It was two years ago, babe. Besides, I would much rather kiss my boyfriend then Tucker.”

Stan’s heart raced again. Boyfriend. That’s right. They were boyfriends now. The title sounded like music to his ears.

Eat shit Craig Tucker.

down-in-the-gutter  asked:

I don't know if anyone asked this about Bae. But what if he was dating someone that was willing to carry him around (Since he is rather lazy) Would he oppose to it or let them carry him?

He would let himself be carried, haha. Well, as long as the person could hold him comfortably and he wasn’t being shook around or in fear of falling. He also wouldn’t want to be carried if they were in a busy place or narrow/small area. Bae would feel more comfortable having control over where he stepped/moved in that case. But if the situation was right and his partner properly carried him around, Bae would be veeery content to not have to walk himself.

Thank you for the question!

he’s all yours (problem) now

S. Coups : I’m sorry.

S. Coups : Chan can’t come to the phone right now.

S. Coups : Why?

S. Coups : Because yall invading his privacy and his dating life and not giving him the respect he deserves and treating it like you own him


Originally posted by matthew-daddario

Summary: You’ve teased Noah while he was away and he’s gonna make sure you learn your lesson.
Type: Smut. Detailed smut. 
Word count: 4551. This is SO much longer than I thought it would be. 
Warnings: Public foreplay, delayed orgasm (edging), oral sex (male), dirty talk, strong language, hints at daddy!kink, vaginal sex. 
A/N: So I’m pretty new here to this “fandom” and this is the first thing that I’ve written for him. If you read this, please give it a like/reblog and my ask is open if you’d like to drop me a message :)
As it’s my first one shot, I don’t have a tag list but if you’d like to be included in one please let me know. 

Sorry for any mistakes in this. 


Noah was unlike anyone else you’d dated before.
He had an air of innocence, the type that fooled your parents into thinking he was a good boy. The type to only want to hold your hand and give you long, lingering kisses as he brought you home on time. It wasn’t a lie, he was a good boy but you loved it when he was bad. He could change that image within seconds. He’d swap his boyish charm to filth at the drop of a hat. He could kiss you, leave your legs weak and trembling, he could tell you how beautiful you looked and would wait for the smile to appear on your face before telling you “how much more beautiful you’d look with my cock in your throat.”

He loved to whisper exactly what he wanted to do to you while out in public just to see you become hot and flustered. He loved to tell you how hard you make him when he’s away filming. The two of you weren’t against pleasuring yourselves on video call while he was away. You loved making him moan as he watched as your fingers move in and out of you, the way he’d bite his lip as he tried not to be too vocal as he took his hard cock in his hand and wanked, that he could alert those in the rooms on either side of his.

You loved his filthy mouth. Especially when he was deep inside of you, fucking you into oblivion. It was the hottest thing you’d ever heard. And tonight was no exception. He’d come home after several weeks of filming and declared he was hungry and wanted to take you out. He’d been excited, clutching your hand as he pulled you towards the subway. His hands were on you the whole time; either on your waist, in your hair, cupping your jaw or on your ass.
He didn’t mind PDA but fully understands time and place is essential. As the carriages fill and empty, he uses his hands accordingly. Little did you know, this would be the start of the teasing that he had in mind.

“Fuck I’ve missed you baby,” he says several minutes after your main course is placed in front of you both.
“I’ve missed you too.” He licks his lips, his eyes glancing around to see if anyone is looking. He pushes his plate closer to yours and moves his cutlery before shuffling his seat closer. “Noah, no.” You know where this is going and despite your words saying no, your core clenches and you feel wetness begin to soak your panties. 

Keep reading

For the better

Draco still can’t believe his luck. He doesn’t know what he did to deserve this. In fact, considering everything he’s done in the past, he doesn’t deserve any of this. Yet, here he is, three years after the war, happy and content. At least theoretically.

Like most nights, Draco clutches his blanket and stares at the ceiling. Sleeping has been difficult. Not because of the nightmares. They’re not completely gone, but it’s much better now. No, it’s because his chest won’t stop hurting.

He slowly turns his head to gaze at the sleeping man beside him. Draco flinches as his heart gives another painful squeeze. He stretches out his hand and carefully buries it in the mop of black curls, relishing the softness. Harry makes a pleased sound in his sleep and his lips curl up ever so slightly. Draco presses his own lips into a tight line.

Sometimes he feels like his heart is going to burst from all the happiness he feels. It’s like his body can’t cope with it, because it doesn’t know how. He’s never felt like this before. But most importantly, he doesn’t deserve this beautiful and kind man, sleeping next to him.

He still doesn’t understand what made Harry want to go out with him. He even initiated it. And now they’re living together. Draco still has a hard time showing his feelings. How can he be open about it, when he’s so conflicted and doesn’t even know what to feel most of the time? It’s hard to just accept the happiness and the way Harry seems to love him so freely.

Draco thought about ending it numerous times. Harry could do so much better than him. Not that he would ever admit that out loud, but it’s true, Draco thinks sadly. But he is far too selfish to give up on Harry.

When Draco brushes his fingers against Harry’s cheek, the other man stirs and knits his brows together.

“Can’t sleep?” he mumbles without opening his eyes.

Draco smiles at him.

“It’s okay,” he  whispers. “Sorry for waking you.”

Harry takes Draco’s hand and interlaces their fingers. He scoots over to him and buries his face in the crook of Draco’s neck. He inhales deeply and lets out a contented sigh.

Draco feels that familiar squeeze in his chest again. He wraps his arm around Harry and plants a kiss on his hair. In this moment, he vows something to himself. Not a day will go by without him trying to make this beautiful man in his arms as happy as possible. He will do everything in his power to show Harry how grateful he is that Harry chose him, for loving him, for making him want to be a better man. But how?

On the outside, he’s still as haughty and snarky as ever, but his friends keep telling him he’s changed. For the better.

He apologised to Granger and Weasley, but he knows he can do better and he’s determined to do so. Not only for Harry’s sake, but also his own.

And that’s when Draco realises, the only way he can make his boyfriend truly happy, is by being happy himself. 

It won’t be easy. He can’t just stop feeling guilty and undeserving. But he hopes he will get there someday. He can’t erase what happened in the past, but what happens in the future, that is up to him. He’s grateful he even got the chance at having a future, let alone with Harry.

So yes, Draco thinks again, he will do everything he can to make Harry happy. And that, apparently, starts with him admitting he is truly happy himself.

(Dedicated to @starshaping, who always lights up my day 💙)

clientele: cheat → myg

↳ pairing: yoongi/reader | smut

↳ au: escort!au

↳ warnings: cheater!yoongi, sex work, face fucking, sir kink, dirty talk, slut shaming, yoongi calls u nasty names, spanking, multiple orgasms. choking

↳ word count: 3.1k

⁙ summary: in your little black book, min yoongi is your client tonight.

⁛ A/N: this….this has absolutely filthy dirty talk. good luck.

Friday, 8 December 2018. 11:30PM.

Client: Min Yoongi

Kinks: Choking, Spanking, Degradation, Sir Kink.

New Client. Mr. Min has requested I remain submissive and I do not address him by name, but simply by “Sir”. Charging him $2,000 for an hour of service delivered to your PayPal 24 hours before meeting.

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“He’s falling asleep… what do I do? What do I do, what do I do…”

Love Retreat (Part 5)

Summary: When you’re invited to a couples’ retreat at work, you say yes to avoid further embarrassment, despite being tragically single. When you tell your friends about the situation you’re stuck in, Bucky comes to the rescue, offering to pretend to be your boyfriend and also have himself a free vacation to the Cayman Islands. (Fake Dating AU)

Word Count: 2,837

Warnings: None.

“Love Retreat” Masterlist

Originally posted by jessica-bones-winchester

Bucky knew he had dug himself deep this time, and there was no way he was going to get out. And if he did, it’d take him years. He took a deep swig of his beer before setting it back down on tabletop, facing Steve and Sam.

He had just told them about the kiss.

And he was regretting it.

Deeply regretting it.

Keep reading

So I was just rewatching ADWM and this scene came up. Can I just say that the effect of Mark trying to tear his way back out always, always gets to me?

Question, though: Could that be not Mark but Damien? Dark’s aura is more red than blue here, after all, which means Celine’s rage could be the stronger influence right now, and the halves of Dark’s broken body aren’t always cohesive. It could be that Celine’s rage is hurting him. 

“Now that we’re here together, we can really get to know each other.”

Damien always did say he and his old friend would catch up, didn’t he? But this isn’t how he wanted it to happen. That said, he collects himself, reins himself in immediately afterward and gets back on their unified track. “You just need to let me in.”

I don’t know, just something to think about.


Some episode ideas that never made it into Gravity Falls (text below in case pictures don’t load (italicized comments are mine)):

  • Dipper and Mabel are pretty good and actually kind of respect them now. (guessing this was the last part of one from a previous page)
  • The BIG THING is in town…redneck owner taunts Stan. Mocks him in front of other tourists. Stan feels washed up? Or tells the kids to go spy on the BIG THING?
  • Episode with They Might Be Giants voicing ACTUAL GIANTS. Huge footprints in forest get Dipper curious. And he and Wendy go out to find out the source? Whats the story here? They can cause earthquakes?
  • Superpowers- Episode where something gives Mabel super strength. Dipper gets the ability to make his enemies grow hair. Or something random and stupid. Soos gets the power of lightning. Wendy can control animals? But only snails or something? (I think Alex might have mentioned this in one of the commentaries, I might have enjoyed this)
  • Pacifica needs the kids help- against her better judgement. Something went missing from daddy’s mansion. Hates them but is going to get in trouble, lose her credit card privileges, etc. Dipper helps her but hates her. She meanwhile tries to seduce Dipper to learn something, and he tells her off LOUD and VISCERAL. You are what’s wrong with this world. She’s hurt, but also impressed. And Kinda likes him now. No one talks to her that way. We learn that she’s more human than we thought. It turns out she’s under a LOT of pressure from her parents? Still is terrible though. (looks like elements from this one made it into “Northwest Mansion Mystery”)
  • RumorCrunchers (Mythbusters) come to town and Stan doesn’t want his Shack getting debunked on state-wide television.
  • Story where horrible new mayor causes intense censorship. Where we can stick it to censors for being the bain of existence. (HA!)
  • Durland has book and can’t read
  • Mabel gets good at miming )
  • “Christmas” Special- Starts with Stan blanketing town in snow trying to free mammoth. Maybe THIS is where we do our THE THING parody? Or maybe something more horrifying? Must defy everything we hold dear about the holidays. (glad we at least got THE THING parody in “Into the Bunker”)
  • “The Fly”- Dippers fly is always down. Turns out this is caused by the ghost of a kid he used to always mock in elementary school. He’s getting what he deserved for tormenting the guy. In order for him to let the curse go Dipper has to get the ghost what the ghost wants- a date with his sister or whatever. (Dipper does not end up caring what people think about his fly, and not caring makes him impossible to mock? Etc?)
  • Stan builds a Computer- Explores Dippers obsession with the internet, which he misses, and Stan’s phobia of technology. Computer leads to fascinating horror. But what? Kids really need to check their internet things.
  • Scary-Oke- Story which begins with kids needing to sing karaoke song together, somehow involves them using karaoke to (page covered) whatever in the end (okay, so THIS one got made)
  • Harryhausen Episode- Season Two’s “Fight (page covered) Stan fighting off 30 claymation skeletons (page covered) giant crab? Robot Owl? Something (page covered) (seeing bits from “Little Gift Shop of Horrors” and “Soos and the Real Girl”)
Boxer vs Artist [t.h.]

Request: oh ok well the concept was boxer!Tom just being soft for his artist!gf and he thinks she’s so precious and pure and he brags about her talent to his boxing buddies and they’re like yeah you’re a lucky dude lol. I was kinda hoping u could write something about it but u don’t have to:)

A/N: Idk I feel like this would be a cool series tbh but I didn’t know how I’d do a one-shot so here’s a headcanon!

masterlist // tag list

  • OKAY so boxer!Tom
  • he’s not exactly “soft” usually
  • like normally he’s kind of all about the gym
  • and wants to keep more to himself and boxing buddies
  • doesn’t really show much affection
  • his head is just with the sport, ya know?
  • BUT
  • then he met you
  • and the boy was suddenly softer than a puppy
  • but only around you
  • you’d met somewhere like a Subway when he was on his way home from the gym
  • he’d seen you the second he walked in and just became totally infatuated with how concentrated you were on your art
  • you were bored while you waited on a friend
  • so he asked you on a date
  • which was a little bit of mess
  • he was nervous which doesn’t happen much but it’s you
  • anyway
  • y’all had gone on a few dates
  • and even though you guys are pretty different
  • you clicked
  • he told you about his boxing
  • partially because he liked talking about it
  • and because you wanted to know why his knuckles looked roughed up all the time
  • and he asked about your art
  • like
  • when i say asked
  • i mean just wanted to see EVERYTHING
  • and never let you stop talking about it
  • so that was the start of a beautiful relationship
  • he’d asked to make it official
  • after you picked him up from the gym one day
  • he had been wanting to
  • but there was something with the way you had graphite on your nose
  • and ink smeared on your hands
  • that made him just blurt out of the question
  • to which you agreed without hesitation
  • now your dates
  • your dates were literally anything between staying inside cuddled on the couch
  • and going on fancy night outs
  • tom was more of a fan of just cuddling
  • especially if that meant you were going to draw
  • but that’s not all
  • which totally lead you trying to teach him to draw a few things
  • it was mostly laughing and tom giving you the sweetest smile
  • needless to say
  • he can’t draw and should stick to boxing
  • anyway because he’s so into your art
  • you wanted to be into his favorite thing
  • so you end up going to the gym with him sometimes
  • and he teaches you some boxing
  • which you’d think he’d be a little “”harsh”” on 
  • ya know since he knows it and he wants you to do well
  • but nah
  • this boy is SOFT
  • like encouraging words and
    • “That was really great, love.”
    • “Can you try this, darlin?”
    • “This rate, you’ll be kicking my ass.”
  • and his boxing buddies happen to overhear
  • and see the way he looks at you
  • because it’s basically the definition of heart eyes
  • so ya know they’re all like ??? because wow he’s actually affectionate??
  • and when you’re not around
  • all tom does is BRAG about you
  • a few times you made him a lunch/snack
  • and you always draw on his napkins
  • it started as a joke from your first date
  • you said something about always doodling in class when you were in school
  • and he asked you to doodle something
  • but all you guys had were napkins and a pen you kept in your purse
  • so you made it work and drew a quick doodle for him
  • so instead of being embarrassed he literally just BEAMS
  • and shows his friends
    • “Look! My girlfriend drew this!”
    • “She’s so talented.”
    • “Isn’t this amazing?”
  • And it’s just little two minute doodles
  • spoiler: tom keep ALL of them
  • his friends kind of laugh about it
  • but not to make fun of him but more in the “wow someone is head over heels” way
  • and a few times, his friends have actually told him how lucky he is
  • and asked if you had any friends
  • because like you keep tom mellow
  • and just make him better
  • he just loves you and your art
  • with all his heart
  • he melts

Keep reading

Lights Out! -m-

Summary: Finding myself suffering from insomnia after my breakup I realize the only thing that can put me to sleep is my ex’s unique sexual technique. But will he grant it to me after we fell out so enormously?

Warnings: Nothing too crazy. Just crude language, oral, unsafe sex, mild spanking and choking

It happened again. I fell asleep and was finally getting some much needed slumber but then just an hour later I suddenly woke up. There was no reason for it; I wasn’t having a nightmare, the neighbors weren’t making noise, nothing was going on. I simply woke up. My eyes popped open and I was wide awake.

I glanced over at the clock and groaned. 2:15 AM. This was not good. It was the third night that week that I couldn’t sleep. It was starting to affect my work. I had spent the whole previous day taking mini-snoozes at my desk and trying not to get caught by my boss. This couldn’t go on another night. I needed help, and I knew of only one place to turn…

My ex was always really good at putting me to sleep.

He used to tease me about it when we were dating but every single time we had sex I fell asleep afterwards, even if it was at midday and I only slept for twenty minutes. He just got me off so hard every time that it was always ‘lights out’ for me as soon as he let me go.

I didn’t know why, but sex with him just gave me this deep sense of relief that made me want to curl up on my side for a light peaceful snooze.

I really missed that.

I hated to admit it even just to myself, but sex was a major thing I missed about Jungkook since our breakup. I missed everything, of course, but I really missed the way he would hold me and touch me and…well, all sorts of other pleasurable things. I missed his laugh a lot, too. But Jungkook and I just didn’t work out.

He didn’t have a lot of time due to his schedule and he expected me to give up everything to be with him. He didn’t complain about my work at all when we first started dating, but after I got a new boss and she started making me work overtime, suddenly Jungkook was very unhappy with everything I did and said. All he did was nag me.

“What is your problem with me?” I finally asked him one day after totally hitting my limit. “Why don’t you just tell me why you’re really mad at me instead of getting worked up over all of this trivial stuff?”

“I’m not mad at you,” he said, all while sounding mad at me.

“Yes, you are! And if you won’t tell me why or what it is that I’ve done, how do you expect me to fix it?”

“You can’t fix it,” he told me.

I frowned. So there was something I was doing, he just didn’t trust me to put forth any effort about changing it?

I sat down next to him, taking his hands in mine. “Jungkook, I’ll do anything for you. Don’t you know that? You’re everything to me.”

“Really?” he asked.

“Of course. So if there’s something I could do that would make things better or easier for our relationship, of course I want to know about it.”

He looked hopeful at this and he turned to me with big shiny eyes. “Quit your job,” he said.

Keep reading

I don’t think people know what being gay means…

*me and my cousin walking downtown*

Random Guy: *looks at me while walking by* you look cute in that outfit

Me: why thank you sir

Cousin: aw come on bro..

Me: what?

Cousin: Bro are you gay or something

Me: No, what would make you assume that?

Cousin: Because you just let that dude call you “cute” and you thanked him for it

Me: Listen bro, i barely had the energy to come outside today and i feel like this conversation is going to take the rest of it

Originally posted by rejected-on-a-cosmic-level

Cousin: Listen man all i’m saying is that, that shit is kinda gay

Me: ok lord. i guess we’re having this talk 

Originally posted by rejected-on-a-cosmic-level

Me: why is accepting a compliment from another man gay?

Cousin: Because you’re letting another dude look at you a certain way that could be sexual

Cousin: you’re only suppose to say that to women

Me: Oh for fucks sake, when was the word cute ever meant to be sexual and only used for women

Me: Dogs are cute my nigga, babies are cute, any Pixar movie is cute

Cousin: you know what i mean 

Me: No i really fucking don’t. being gay means that i want to date or have sex with other men, and i don’t. So when did accepting a compliment = lets have sex?

Homophobic Cousin: Nigga you’re letting another man fantasize about dating you, that’s just as bad 

Me: How the hell do you know he wants to date me!? are you Professor X now? i can’t stop that man from thinking about me in any way, shape or form. Nor do i care what he thinks about, just like with anyone else. But even still i rather have him think i’m cute than “hey i wanna punch this nigga in the face”

Me: i take compliments as they are; nice things that people say to other people because they like something about you. No more No less

Homophobic Cousin: im just saying, thinking about another man like that is gay to me

Me: you literally model yourself to be just like Meek Mill. You have all his songs, mixtapes and a bunch of his T-shirts. You follow him on all social media’s and try to dress and act just like him

Me: Going by your logic, If anyone is gay here it’s the guy that likes and thinks about another man so much that he tries to be him

Confused Homophobic Cousin: 

Moral of this story: Words cannot make someone anything. 

Words have and always will be a way to communicate thoughts and feelings to a certain extent. A dude can say that he’s gay, but if he isn’t taking dick from or giving dick to another man, then its just words.


If you’re so homophobic that you think compliments from another man is equal to a dick being up your ass then you need to seriously get over yourself.

We live in a society where niggas like this want to look better or be better than other men, but also don’t want any men to compliment them.  What kind of fucked up world do you want to live in? Where everyone hates each other but still want to impress each other?

Take the compliment, Smile, Go on with your day.

 No magical dick will be put up your ass if you do so

 i hate these niggas.

  • <p> <b>My friend:</b> So you have a thing for guys rolling up their sleeves, gloves, and suspenders?<p/><b>Me:</b> (thinking about Ignis) yeah<p/></p>

i felt like i was left at the altar

B99 + Queer Eye AU: in which the Fab 5 helps S1!Jake get his shit together.

  • Gina calls the Fab 5 to help Jake prep for The Party. (“Our boss’s birthday is coming up, and his husband is throwing this big, fancy gathering… Jacob is, uh, not fancy at all. I mean, I’ve known Jake forever, and our friendship is little-boy-holding-little-girl’s-hand, but he is a straight up mess. You gotta fix him.”)
  • They catch him right as he’s parking outside his apartment, and already they’re not the most impressed over his car. Like, is it meant to look vintage or is it just a crappy second-hand car? Why are the windows just half rolled up? Actually, is that a shower curtain covering his rear window?
  • In Jake’s defense, his apartment building seems nice enough. Surely his place can’t be that bad, right????????????????
  • Bobby has never seen so many massage chairs in one household. Why does this boy own six massage chairs? Are those three turntables? What is going on here?
  • Jonathan walks into Jake’s bathroom to check out the hair and skin care product situation only to find a TUB FILLED WITH MAIL????????? HENNY, NO, HENNY 
  • Antoni’s soul has officially left his body at the sight of Jake’s fridge. Currently, he’s got orange soda, orange soda, blue juice, and orange soda. Also, apparently a “healthy breakfast” for him is a gummy bears wrapped in a fruit roll up. Uhm.
  • TAN WANTS TO KNOW WHAT IS UP WITH ALL THIS PLAID. Also, where is the formal wear? Is he planning to show up to his boss’ party in dress sneakers? Why does he own so many sneakers?!?
  • Karamo asks Jake about his love life. Homeboy just shrugs and says it’s been p boring lately (see: that one lady who bursts into tears when she found out he was a Gemini) BUT!! He also somehow manages to mention Amy five times in three minutes, and Antoni fully pounces on that.
  • They get Jake to admit that he’s kinda sorta been obsessed with her since she flirted with him for 20 seconds during their date-turned-stakeout!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Obvi the new mission is to get Jake looking snazzy af for The Party bc Amy’s gon’ be there && it’s time to let her know that He Is An Option!!
  • Jake opens up about how he doesn’t feel like he’s good enough for Amy, so Karamo gives him a whole pep talk on how amazing and smart and charming and hot he is!!!! Jake’s still wanting to improve himself for Amy tho, so they go to a museum so he can get a crash course on art history (and date ideas, ofc).
  • Antoni gets Jake to consider drinking Orangina as a healthier alternative to orange soda and teaches him how to make hot chocolate from scratch bc it’s Amy’s fave!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Perogies would’ve been a gr9 thing for him to learn how to make, but like… we gotta be realistic here, fam.)
  • Bobby gets Jake to sell 5 of his massage chairs and also takes him mattress shopping. (“Okay, I know this might seem like much too much money now, but it’s going to be so worth it when Amy sleeps over at your place and feels like she can actually get a good night’s rest. You want that, don’t you?”)
  • Jonathan really doesn’t have much to to teach Jake about styling his hair, but they do go over some manscaping tips + Jake finally finds out what moisturizer is!
  • Tan and Jake hit the thrift store to “elevate his look.” They also go get him a custom tailored suit for the big night. Jake models all of the new outfits like a champ while the others wolf whistle and cheer like there’s no tomorrow.
  • Jake totes gets choked up when they all have to leave and gives them a standing invitation to happy hour at Shaw’s.
  • They watch a feed of Jake getting ready – JONATHAN IS SO PROUD HE REMEMBERED TO LOTION HIS FOREARMS & TAN IS PUMPED HE ISN’T WEARING PLAID UNDERNEATH THE BLAZER!! They also get to see Jake picking Amy up on the way to The Party and “ARE THEY WEARING MATCHING COLORS???????? IT’S LOVE.”


ps: shout out to @beatcopjake​, @nevermindthewind​, @santiagoswagger​, and @fourdrinkamy​ for listening to me yell about this! luv y’all

phil’s younow ~ oct 11, 2018
  • phil did a long glitch but fixed it
  • there have been spiders
  • he’s had an autumn candle haul, but they’re horrible – the first one smelled too strong, the second one smelled like bathroom cleaner, and phil was the only one that liked the last one
  • it’s okay though because he bought “haunted hollow” last year so he can still burn a festive candle! 
  • he’s going to look for spooky names later this month
  • he’s staying hydrated!! it’s not worth the peeing though. 
  • everyone’s saying how often they pee and it’s the latest scientific study 
  • he has a new hoodie he might wear for the next amazingphil viddy (next week!!)
  • plugging danny boi’s merch and talking about how it’s such a good cause and dan had been talking about it for years
  • he ordered himself some of dan’s merch :) 
  • new gaming viddy should go up about ten minutes after the stream! 
  • hints: popcorn and barrel! he apparently left something behind we’ll hear about in said video
  • phil’s ENTIRE instagram explore page is slime videos (hence his latest insta story) 
  • phil favors the maple pecan latte over the psl
  • he visited an art fair with martyn and cornelia! 
  • he’s loving the inktober art, especially about him
  • riverdale, american horror story, the walking dead, and something else have come back
  • d a n  a n d  i 
  • they’ve been painstakingly working on the ii movie
  • early next week we’ll find out about the ii movie, and we’ll be able to watch it by the end of the year! 
  • they did the sound, the color grading, and the editing–the whole shabang– themselves
  • phil loved new zealand and misses manila!
  • he hasn’t yet watched riverdale but he will
  • phil misses everyone from the tour :(
  • they’re still working on tbc dates and can’t say anything, but things are coming into place and phil says not to give up hope! 
  • he’d love to say more about tbc but he doesn’t want to get everyone excited and then let people down 
  • phil listened a bit to trench just from hearing dan play it 
  • phil’s big on bakeoff
  • he’s being v vague about what color his corgi hat will be
  • he asked for some games for spooky week! some fun, some scary :) tweet him with your ideas! 
  • moral of the story: don’t buy candles on the internet because you can’t sniff them and reviews are unreliable. 

[ a person is about to ask Shiro out ]

Person, to Shiro: So, you’re single or..?

Lance, pushing his way through the crowd to get himself right in between the person and Shiro: OR!