let them judge

So I work for my local Child Protective Services...

And everyone’s response is the same when they hear this: sympathy, they could never do my job, ouch, etc. Very appropriate responses, but all of these are typically in regards to the families I work with.

I will be honest: many of the parents I encounter should never have been parents. Ever. Many should not even be trusted with a cactus, nonetheless another living being. However, most of my families AREN’T like this, and the ones which are like this I tend to give some slack, even as I’m working like hell to keep their kids safe. Many of them have severe mental health issues, and many have been told, despite not having a parenting bone in their body, that they SHOULD be parents and they needed to grow up and BE parents, without ever acknowledging that parenting is completely beyond their abilities.

Which brings me to the frustrating portion of the job: people who SHOULD know better and yet don’t. 

These are the supposedly mentally healthy, educated, intelligent beings who return to the children to the parents against all evidence pointing out how terribly this will end. These are the people who struggle to provide evidence against the parents in court because they want to be liked and they don’t want to bad talk the parents. These are the people who close their eyes against warning sign after warning sign because despite multiple HORRIFIC failures, they want to give these parents a chance, because they’re sure that these parents love their children and want the best for them…deep down. Really deep down.

There is a view on what parenting is supposed to be and what the relationship between parents and their children are supposed to be and don’t get me started on the myths regarding maternal instincts. It’s easy to get wrapped up in ideals and ignore the blatant evidence right in front of them, and the result is too many children being endangered…and in some cases, depending on the children, people AROUND the children being endangered.

I had one adoptive parent, who was related to the father, be so upset because the father couldn’t “man up” and take responsibility because he was signing away his rights to the child. I had to convince her that he WAS fulfilling his responsibility: by recognizing that he could not possibly parent the child and was allowing the child to grow up in a good home.

I’m childfree, and I’ve heard multiple times that I should have kids and I would be such a good mother and blahblahblah. Being childfree has given me a perspective a lot of people around me don’t have. These people believe that everyone should have children and everyone has the instinct to love, protect, and nurture those children. This can lead to actively dangerous situations for the children, and even when the parent states that they can’t do it, that they hate the child, that they want someone else to have the child, I still hear judges and counselors and service providers insisting that if the parent just had a LITTLE MORE HELP…

So, no. It’s typically not the parents which make my job so hard. It’s the people who should know better and get confused when everything goes to hell.

Do not let them go.

Throughout life you will meet one person who is unlike any other.
You could talk to this person for hours and never get bored,
you could tell them things and they won’t judge you.
This person is your soulmate, your best friend.
Don’t ever let them go.

#when will the Original Iwatobi Relay Team come back from the war

I was feeling nostalgic earlier and i skimmed through the high speed manga and i remembered again how much i love my tiny rarepairs, like makorin who are adorable and smiling up there because they were friends and also had fondness for each other.

and also i saw this tiny panel

it’s smol and like… at the back of a Very Important Haruka panel but this made me smile so much because this was the scene before Nagisa went to say “I’m really nervous!” all smiley at Haruka??? this implies that he was more nervous and worried but rin talked to him so he’s kinda more smiley after?? that’s such a cute small detail!!! also rin and nagisa are so touchy, i appreciate my cuddle buddies being on #brand.

i love nagirin so much ok

anonymous asked:

Idk if you've been asked this before, but what are your thoughts of Bensavi?

I need someone to cry and yell about Fairy Tail with cause i just saw trailers for dragon cry today and i am so fucked up;0;

Andre Burakovsky #1

PART TWO // PART THREE

I’ve found a new love for the Washington Capitals and you can blame this guy mostly. But anyways, I really liked writing this so I hope everyone likes it too haha. Requests are open! :)

Word Count: 1,275

Originally posted by puck-me-pls

Leaving bed in the morning was always hard. Add a large cuddly man in the bed beside you, begging you not to go, and it was even harder. “No, stay, please,” Andre whined while you pulled back the covers and set your feet on the cold flooring beside the bed. 

Keep reading

Throughout life you will meet one person who is like no other.

You could talk to this person for hours and never get bored,
you could tell this person things and they will never judge you. This person is your soulmate, your best friend. Never let them go.

anonymous asked:

As a mom, how do you help a daughter with mental illness?

First, just listen. Don’t pressure, but give them the opportunity to open up and let them know you won’t judge or be disappointed with anything they have to say. And second, educate yourself. Learn about what’s a normal part of development and what’s a sign of a bigger problem.

every person that says bunnies are ~boring animals~ and just “sit there” are people i get annoyed with and 99% of that because it is people that have put bunnies in a tiny cage and never spent time with them or let them act natural and judge them based on that… A bored neglected animal… Like the amount of people that also come and describe their rabbits like “He is more like a dog than a rabbit, he follows me around and sit in my knee and lies down next to me!” is so common, like, no. That’s rabbit behavior. The reason you think otherwise is because so many people take terrible care of their small animals that they are completely misrepresented.

like this is more or less true with all tiny animals I just see it more with bunnies

anonymous asked:

Hi! Can you tell me how to find confidence to wear what I want? People are used to seeing me dressed in a certain way and I'm afraid that they will judge me or laugh at me. Please help ://

three words: dress for yourself.

i feel like a lot of people who have try to keep their true styles in the shadows or hesitate to experiment with their wardrobe don’t necessarily lack confidence but have a mindset of dressing for others. the clothes you wear should be about you bc fashion is a way of expressing yourself. ofc it’s nice to receive compliments and become that friend everyone runs to for style advice, but then it starts becoming more of a part-time job. so think of fashion as a hobby. do it bc you’re passionate about it and it makes you feel good and happy wearing whatever YOU want to wear. who cares what other people think? let them judge and let them laugh. you don’t need their stamp of approval. just bc your style choices don’t vibe with what they may think “looks good”, it doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong or bad. it only makes you more unique and special and YOU. and being you is more than enough.

i am so afraid of what other people think of me that i let them judge right from wrong.

so when you packed your bags and left them tugging at the front door, i screamed for you, i cried, i let you put my feelings into a box, label me “obsessive” and “crazy,” let you make me into the bad guy for simply reacting.

and when i asked my therapist if feeling things so strongly was right or wrong, she asked me, “what do you think?”

and i don’t remember the last time someone asked me what i thought and when i said i think i was doing the right thing by feeling she said, “then you are.”

and now the times i’m grieving, i try to remember that my opinion means something. that i have to value it, value it more than anything. because once you value your own feelings, no one can invalidate them. you can’t tell me what makes me brave. i think feelings are supposed to be felt. you can no longer pressure me into shutting them out.

—  i’m not crazy just because you say i am
When you are 18 years old and date James Franco

After a long long break I am back :D yay <3 so here is the one I promised with 1276 words. I hope you enjoy it. Lotsa Love truly yours Kate.

I walked out of the classroom. It was time for the lunch break. My friends told me to meet them at the entrance of the school. I looked around and saw no one in sight. I was the first one. I walked past a few students and sat on a bench. It looked like I had time, till the others came out so I pulled out my phone from my bag. For days I’ve kept thinking about James and his directing class. I knew he was busy so I didn’t want to bother him. But on the other side I wanted to write him, because I missed him and we couldn’t hear from each other since a week. He didn’t bother to write me but I didn’t mind because I knew that he was kept busy because of his work. So I started to type Mr. Franco to show him that I put some distance to our relationship. Instantly I regretted it, because I knew that it wasn’t his fault.  The only thing I wanted to do is to know how it went. But I couldn’t hide my bitterness. I wanted to delete the text and start something new. Accidently I hit the send button and was in shock.

“Please no no no. I hope you don’t look at your phone right now! Please don’t see it!” I’ve told myself. People who passed me might think I was nuts. In horror I looked at the display to check if there was a green tick.  And there it was the green tick of chaos. I don’t get why the phones don’t have the „are you sure “message popping up anymore. Frustrated about the new technology I hung my head low and decided to wait. In the next seconds the Ping tune came from my phone which was in my hand.

[ James: Never  heard that from you before but Hello to you too Mrs Franco. ]

How could he react so normal about that? Could it be that he didn’t get it by Mr. Franco? Maybe he didn’t really understand it. Doesn’t matter anymore. What could I answer to that I thought to myself. I looked up and saw Sophia, Eva, Jess and Victoria walking to me.

“What’s the matter honey? ” asked Sophia.

“N-Nothing I was just waiting for you.” I explained.

“Really? You look kind of tired.”

“Did something happen to you know who.” said Eva.

“What Voldemort?” Victoria gasped.

“Shut up no one’s talking about Harry Potter. I mean James by you know who.” Told Eva to the others.

“Ahh why don’t you call him just by his name. Everyone knows it by now.” Put in Jessica.

“could you all just be quiet, please. Nothing happened okay I was just writing him, that’s all. He is busy these days.” I explained.

“Okay good to know. So where are we going?” asked Sophia.

While the girls argued where we should head to I opened my texts again. I saw that James was writing something and waited. It was like it took hours for him to send it.

[ James:                                          What  are you doing? ]

Oh shit I forgot to write him back.  I looked at my phone and started writing frantically.

[ You:                                             Just  got out of school. Talking with friends. ]

I was nervous because I couldn’t wait for his answer. At that moment I realized how much I missed him. I knew that the girls could see me going crazy because of texting, but I didn’t care and let them judge me.

[ James:                                         Are  there male friends? ]

I looked at my phone twice to be sure what he said. This little shit asking for real if there were male friends. I couldn’t believe it. He was starting it again. Acting all confident. I didn’t want him to check up on me. So I started with my answer.

[ You:                                            Maybe.  Not gonna answer to that. Why? ]

I smiled to myself, pleased with my answer.

[ James:                                         Just  asking. ]

[ You:                                             How’s  work going? ]

[ James: I am waiting for  someone. Something important came up. So I am taking a break right now. Why? ]

Who could it be I asked myself. Who is the person he waits for? Why didn’t he tell me about it and is

the person he meets so important. I tried to stay calm and I hoped my response didn’t show that it

affected me nor that I was jealous.

[ You: Just  asking. Hope you are doing fine these days. But it sound‘s all right I guess. ]

[ James:                         Yeah  everything’s good. Have you eaten already?  ]        

[ You: No  probably we are gonna grab some Sandwiches. What about you? ]

[ James: Sounds  delicious. I have a date in a few seconds, see you later. ]

[ You:                                                       wait… ]

Great he was already offline. I tried to call him once and gave up. What was he up to. I want to know who his date was. I bet she must be a Model or a Playmate or someone from a magazine or all of them at once. I bet she must be older than me. I mean I am only 18 and don’t have a chance. I know that he likes women who are older than him. Everyone can tell that by his past but still I didn’t like the idea. Maybe she has the knowledge to lead him on. He likes it to be lead, even though he can be bossy sometimes. On the other hand, he is very attentive. Oh god to describe him is even stressful. This man comes with it all positive sides and negative ones. Being one of the best actors in Hollywood, writing several books, directing classes and giving speeches in Universities. But still being handsome and having all the pretty actresses around him and the fame, he is so down to earth and normal about his life. He doesn’t care what other people think of him and he wants people to think of him like that.  While thinking about James I started falling for that unbelievable guy again. Shouldn’t I be angry for him to go on dates. Somehow I am not, I don’t know what is wrong with me. I miss him so much that I can’t even get mad at him.

Suddenly I heard my phone ringing. I picked it up and said Hello.

“Where are you?”

“I am still at school!”

“Why are you yelling?”

“I am sorry. I don’t want to waste your time James. You have better things to do, like to go on a date with a beautiful actress of yours.”

“you’re right, you never told me that you were an actress but okay.”

“What are you talking about?”

“What are you talking about, messing with my head like that. Turn around let’s go.”

“What?”

“Hang up!”

“Hey Jule isn’t that James walking over here?” gasped Sophia.

“yeah he is!” Victoria agreed

“Okay girls let’s not freak out.” said Eva

“I can’t believe you!” I gasped in shock. I pointed at him.

“Gotcha.” He laughed and opened his arms. I let myself fall in his arms closed my eyes and sniffed his perfume.

“I can’t be lieve that you are so low. But I am glad you are here because I missed you so much.” I explained and realizing I was angry then I started hitting him.

“Stop hitting me. I thought you missed me!” he chuckled.

“I missed you but that act was so unnecessary right now.” I explained

“Come one you are glad to see me.” he smirked

“I am but still.”

“Let’s make up. I am hungry we can talk while we eat.” he offered.

“Okay let’s go.” I gave in.

Age gap - Request

(What an original title…)

Requested by anon:  Hey, I was wondering if you would write a Dean/Reader fic, where the Reader is like 10 years younger than Dean? Like she’s mid-20 and he mid-30? And people who meet them don’t think they’re together, especially women who flirt with her boyfriend right in front of her eyes and sometimes even insult her?

Summary: A woman tries to flirt with Dean in front of (Y/N) and doesn’t really believe they are dating, which makes (Y/N) feel really upset about the whole thing. So Dean tries to comfort her and… Fluff. (I suck with summaries, pardon me.)

Pairing: Dean x reader

Word count: 2,248

Warnings: Dean implying dirty things… at the very end…

A/N: First fic of 2017! I loved doing this, age-gapped realtionships are my very fave and oh Lord this request made me so happy…. THANK YOU! I really liked it, and I hope you do too.

Enjoy!

Originally posted by out-in-the-open

Maybe it was her matureness, or maybe that he was a man-child; maybe it was the many things they had in common, or the ones they differed. Maybe it was a prank made by some naughty cherub that made them fall in love; or even so Chuck’s way of saying “thank you”, but either way they had fallen in love and nothing could interfere between them – not even the age gap.

Yes, there were sixty year old men married to twenty year old girls, as well as forty year old women dating nineteen year olds, but Dean and (Y/N) – as well as everyone around them – felt like the mild ten years gap was massive. She was still in her twenties, and she was vibrant and so full of life it was unbelievably attractive for the already thirty year old Dean, who’s age and life had led him to mature enough to turn into a dad every time (Y/N) did something reckless like the things he used to do.

But they were so happy together…

Of course, there was also that social pressure than got to their nerves. For starters: Her parents. Not only did her dad got all grumpy when he met Dean but also Sam had taken a while to get used to the idea because he too saw her like a child. Less to say, everyone around them couldn’t get in their minds that they were actually dating, and actually in love – not just a sugar daddy with his princess.

“Hey handsome,” a MILF greeted as she sat on the bar stool next to Dean, “how about you drop your daughter at a friend’s house and take me to my place?”

“She’s not my daughter.” Dean replied with a sarcastic smile as (Y/N) gave her a death glare from the opposite side of Dean.

“Niece, granddaughter… Whatever.” The woman rolled her eyes.

“Girlfriend, actually.” Dean snapped and the woman let out a dry laugh.

“Right, you dating this… Kid?” She couldn’t believe it, “Honey, if you didn’t want to say yes you just had to be honest, not lie.”

“She really is my girlfriend, and I would really appreciate it if you went to stalk someone else and let us enjoy our evening.” Dean spoke in the most calm way possible, but (Y/N) – who knew him very well – could tell how pissed off he really was.

“You’re rejecting this” she gestured for Dean to notice her curves, “for a gold digger?”

“Basically, I’m rejecting an old-ass woman who doesn’t know what being taken means.” Dean chuckled cruelly, reaching for (Y/N)’s hand and squeezing it tightly.

“At least I’m a woman.” The stranger barked, “I’m sure behind all that makeup she still has zits.”

“It’s better than being all wrinkly.” (Y/N) beamed, making Dean choke.

The woman gasped loudly, she was offended. “How dare you?”

(Y/N) shrugged her shoulders and the woman left. Both (Y/N) and Dean were used to older women – MILFs – flirting with Dean, as well as them not buying it when he explained (Y/N) was his girlfriend. Why was it so hard to understand? It wasn’t as if ten years was that much. And yes, Dean had a few wrinkles and (Y/N) still had her baby face, but apart from that there wasn’t much difference.

“That was fun.” (Y/N) breathed out sarcastically as she and Dean got in the car.

“It wasn’t that bad.” Dean locked eyes with her, begging for his girlfriend to agree.

“We’ve been through worse.” She granted and Dean smiled, “I just wished they weren’t so cynical and avoided flirting with you right in front of me.”

“To be fair, they think you’re my daughter.” Dean clicked his tongue and sat up straight; putting the key in its place and making Baby come to life with a twist of it.

“To be fair, a decent woman wouldn’t flirt like that with a man in front of his daughter.” (Y/N) insisted.

“To be fair, none of them was decent.” Dean chuckled. He wasn’t as affected by everyone else’s behaviour because he was never insulted. Whether it was because boys the age of (Y/N) were utterly scared of his authoritarian pose or because older men respected when a guy dated someone younger – because they were mature enough to do so – and the ones who didn’t usually got kicked in the ass before they could even approach her.

“To be fair, it’s awfully annoying.” (Y/N) continued.

“To be fair, I love you.” Dean stated, knowing that those three words would calm (Y/N) down.

It was her safe zone, something to grip onto when times get tough. Whenever someone insulted her out of jealousy, or tried to play with her mind claiming that Dean couldn’t really be in love with a kid, or just messing in their relationship, Dean only needed to remind her what was keeping them together – what made them get together in the first place – and that would be the end of it.

He was protective of her, and most times the one to scold her after a hunt in which she did something stupid or dangerous. He would take care of her when she was sick, or dealing with any kind of hormonal issue, as well as cure her when hunts got a little too violent. Dean was the kind of man who works better as a human shield than he does as a boyfriend, but honestly, she couldn’t complain.

She was young, and so dumb in so many things… The lack of experience sometimes got to Dean’s nerves, but she was also open minded and not only would she absorb every last bit of information like a sponge absorbs water, but she would also find different ways of doing things – like the time she hula-hooped her way across a farm full of ghosts – she was a revolutionary, just like any other young woman. Of course, she spent much time on social media and doing “Millennial stuff” but truth was it made Dean feel alive again.

They were so uneven their relationship became equal. They completed each other, and made the other’s life find its balance. It was like with magnets – opposites are attracted to each other. And, when Sam understood that, every resistance he had settled fell down.

(Y/N) had been hunting with them for a while; since she was seventeen, to be specific. Of course, Sam couldn’t help to see her like the teenager they rescued from a fire caused by a wicked witch. Dean had seen her like so for many years until her matureness caught his attention.

Of course, she had the body of a younger woman, but her brain was something different. She was smart, comprehensive, merciful, empathetic and so authentic, it was impossible for Dean not to fall for her. She could be serious in serious times and childish in childish times; her control over herself was something Dean couldn’t even dream of when he was her age.

“Babe, are you okay?” Dean asked. They were parked right in front of the bunker. (Y/N) hadn’t said a single word on their way back home.

“Yup, why?” She lifted an eyebrow, trying to look normal but Dean knew her a lot more than she knew herself.

Her breath was different, and her eyes had that thing that makes Dean’s heart ache. The curve of her lips were trembling lightly and Dean could see her jaw clenched, figuring her teeth were pressed against it other tightly. Her eyes looked sad, no matter how much she tried to look tired, and her back was arched to the front rather than the usual straight position she tried to keep.

“Is it because of that woman?” (Y/N) didn’t have to say anything, the mere mention of that person made her face fall. “Babe, we’ve been through this many times- I love you, and only you, no matter what others say… Let-”

“Let them judge.” (Y/N) finished the sentence, “I know.”

“Then why are you down?” He leaned closer to her, instantly holding her hands in his warm ones.

She breathed in deeply, biting her lower lip as she tried to formulate the correct sentence. “I just…” She sighed, “It really hurts me to see them flirting with you. As in: they are your age, they have quite the same knowledge of life and the experience and… I feel like you could share so many things with them you can’t share with me… Like life during the 80s or something.” She looked down shyly, “Maybe you’d enjoy them better than me. Sometimes I do feel like your daughter, because you scold me and get pissed at me for being so ruthless and- and I don’t know.”

Dean listened carefully to ever single syllable she pronounced. “Babe…”

“No, don’t babe me. You know I’m right.” She looked up at him. His eyes were glossy and his lips were lightly parted; on the other hand, she had tears threatening to spill and her cheeks were blushed. “I thought it wouldn’t be… hard. It would’ve been worse if we had started dating when we met, but even so… I’m still too young, and too dumb and so immature…”

“You’re the smartest girl I know.” Dean stated softly.

“What will happen in the future, Dean?” (Y/N) inquired sadly, “What if we stick together and I start craving a family? What if you feel too old to have kids by then? Or what will happen when I grow up and make my own decisions rather than asking you for advice? What will happen when I grow up? Our whole relationship will change.” (Y/N) cleared her throat, “Right now I have issues everyone my age has, and they feel like the biggest thing in the world… And you help me, because you know they’re not that bad… But when I grow up, when I’m more mature, I won’t need you to give me advice, and…”

“I’m not dating you only because I like being your personal counsellor, (Y/N).” Dean smiled warmly, “You’re too mature… At least most of the times, and even when you grow up-” He let out a shy chuckle, “well, I’m not getting any younger.”

“But, Dean…” He placed a finger over her lips.

“Let me finish.” He begged, “When it comes to you, none of it matters.”

“But…” Dean lifted and eyebrow and that was enough for her to stay quiet.

“Having a family, with kids and all… I can be sixty years old and still want it as long as it’s with you. I know you may not see it know, but you make me so happy… You’re that missing piece I had searched for, and no matter what anyone says, I’m not giving up on you anytime soon.”

Dean shifted even closer to (Y/N). His breath and hers crashed against each other as his calloused palm cupped her cheeks and his apple green eyes locked with her (Y/E/C) ones. “I’m so in love with you… And not like a puppy love but rather a serious love… A real kind of love.”

“Dean…”

“Dean.” He mimicked, “The only one who should be worried is me – Dean. Maybe you’ll grow up and realize you don’t love me anymore, or that I’m not the type of man you want to spend the rest of her life with… And that’s fine as long as I get to enjoy every damn second I have with you by my side.”

“I will never – never ever – stop loving you.” She whispered.

“Then why are we worrying about?” He smiled cheekily at her and it was so contagious her lips ended up curving as well. “I love you, kiddo.”

“I won’t love you anymore if you keep calling me kiddo, old man.” She joked.

“What about baby?”  Dean wiggled his eyebrows, making her giggle.

“Do I get a bottle?” She inquired, following his joke.

“Only if it contains beer.” Dean left a shy peck on her forehead, “But seriously, (Y/N/N)…”

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry.” Dean muttered, “I do get very jealous whenever anyone lays eyes on your flawless ass,” (Y/N) laugh, “and I sure as Hell hate it when other women don’t respect you… But you’re mine, and I’m yours and, I don’t know about you, but that’s more than enough for me.”

(Y/N) nodded. “Let them judge.”

“Let them judge.” Dean repeated the mantra before leaving a soft kiss on her lips.

No matter how many prejudices people had – which were many – (Y/N) and Dean would overcome them. After all, they were all they needed, and as long as they loved each other things would be just fine.

-

“Okay but do you really feel like… Like my daughter?” Dean furrowed his eyebrows.

“Only when you act like a dad with me.” She replied nonchalantly.

“I won’t act like a dad, then.” Dean breathed out, “Although…”

“Although what?”

“You can call me daddy anytime you want, sweetheart.” Dean winked at her.

“You’re gross.” She furrowed her nose.

“Are you kink-shaming me?” Dean pretended to be offended.

“Only because of the context.” (Y/N) laughed.

“Who’s the gross one then, huh?” Dean wrapped his arms around her.

“You are.” She breathed out. Dean left a warm kiss on her shoulder.

“You can be gross with me…” He whispered seductively.

“Gross.” Dean laughed.

“You love me.”

“That I do.” Dean smiled proudly, leaving yet another kiss on her lips.

“And I love you.”


*Requests are ALWAYS open.*