Archie’s Unofficial List of Bad RPer Red Flags
A’ight so I’ve been roleplaying for a while, about nine years now, and let me tell you, I’ve had some awful RP partners. From sexual predators to emotionally manipulative people, and I’ve picked up a lot of red flags that I saw some time in my relationship with these people, so I figured being the RP senpai that some people see me as, I’d write them down.
- They’re not interested in your character. The best RP partners I’ve had over the years roleplay with me because they love my character, they love their character, and they love what our characters can do together. They want to know about my character so they can make plots accordingly, and spitball ideas. It seems obvious, but if someone’s not interested in your character but very interested in RPing with you, I’d call that a red flag.
- RPing with them feels like a privilege. I can’t even tell you the amount of times I’ve had a bad RP partner and didn’t know it yet, and when we were still RPing, it felt like whenever we got to do one on one sessions, that I was taking up their valuable time. That’s definitely a red flag.
- They’re just a little too nice. They’re just too nice for comfort. They like all of your posts, they give you gifts, want to spend a lot of time with you, all of which are benign usually, but with them it just feels weird. Another HUGE red flag after this one is that this niceness doesn’t stay. After getting to know them, they stop trying to win you over and their personality completely changes.
- They don’t make time for you. I remember one RP partner in particular who would always be off RPing with a mutual friend of ours, and our RP always came second. It’d take him hours to post on a medium where replies were expected within 5-10 minutes if not sooner, and whenever this was brought up, he called me way too clingy, and said he just didn’t have time to RP more often than that, despite RPing with our mutual friend for hours at a time.
- They get jealous if you RP with someone else. While jealousy happens from time to time, with them, it’s excessive. If you roleplay with someone else, they need to know who it is and what you’re RPing. If you don’t want to tell them, obviously you’re trying to sabotage your RP with them. This behavior is a giant red flag, and I’d say to cut them loose immediately if you experience it.
- They surround themselves with typically weak-willed people. This one took me a long time to spot, but a lot of the bad RPers that I have will surround themselves with people who have very poor self-esteem or come off as very passive. A friend and I once had the same bad RP partner, and they come off as very cute and spunky where I come off as more assertive, and, unsurprisingly, they clung to my seemingly-weak-willed friend instead of me, because they were easier to manipulate in the bad RPer’s eyes.
- They need to be in control of an RP. If they’re not in control, they freak out. Often times they’re the one who comes up with the plots, and any you run by them gets shut down. While they’re free to do whatever they want to their character to hurt you, if you do anything to yours, it’s crossing the line.
- They play games with you. They ask you seemingly benign questions then will explode if you say the wrong answer, they sabotage your RP that’s not with them, they see how far they can push you before you bite back.
- They spy on your roleplay. This one’s pretty self-explanatory and really only applies to MMO settings, but they spy on their RP on an alt character.
- They will take IC into OOC. This can go in so many different directons and I’ve had it taken in different directions, but taking a romantic RP as that you’re flirting with them OOC, if you have a fight OOC and it transfers to their character being mad for no reason IC, or if they start talking shit about you to others because they don’t like the way that something happened ICly, drop them.
- They make it so that you can only RP with them. Let’s say they convince you to drop your characters together in some lost and forgotten section of the world until further notice, or your character is in a position where they can’t function without the bad RPer’s character being with them.
- They have nothing good to say about anyone around you. They’re the kind of person who you dread bringing up new people you’ve met, because they’re immediately going to say “Oh, yeah two years ago they said something sort of racist.” or “I heard they meta-game out the ass” or anything else negative.
- They discourage you from meeting new people. This is another one that I didn’t pick up on for a while, but often times I see it in toxic RP partners that they don’t want to meet new people, and encourage others to follow in their way, either by talking shit about city RP or doing what was mentioned above in 12.
- If they do something, it’s fine. If you do the same thing, it’s cause for a war. This is another one that I’ve had a lot of experiences with. If they kill off their character out of the blue, you’re being unreasonable for being upset. If you kill off your character after asking them and planning it for weeks, you’re a bad RP partner.
- They constantly play the victim. They can do no wrong, someone is always wronging them. If you have a fight with them, even if they’re undeniably in the wrong, it’s your fault, and you have to apologize.
These are really only a few, but here’s some red flags for you! Feel free to reblog with ones that I may have missed or fall out of my experience. These are all taken from many of the bad experiences or RP partners I’ve had over the years.