let me see if i can spell this right

anonymous asked:

I started a honey jar but I'm skeptical as to how would I go about it's disposal. In fact any jar spell.I live in a middle of a city where I'm sure I can't find a burial spot without people looking over at me. I mean there ain't no secrecy for me. I blessed all the herbs, honey in the name of Holy Trinity and it was prayed using Psalms. I want to ritually dispose without eliminating my spell effect. Should I let the jar material go into the sink in the name of holy trinity while thanking ?

You can dispose of the contents and the honey jar as you see fit, however I recommend not disposing it right in your home. If you cannot bury it, then the second best would be to either toss it in the garbage somewhere away from home.

A Rainy Day in Dor-lómin

“-six, seven, eight, and I’m building a fortress in Himlad.”

“You can’t. You could only build a fortress if you owned all of the Marches, and I hold Estolad.”

“This game is stupid. When the weather clears I’m going to build a fortress there for real and there won’t be a damn thing you can do to stop me.”


“Right hand green.”

“Er.”


“Where’s the Doriathrim army?”

“They were the…yellow pieces, yes? I only see two. I think Huan might have eaten the rest.”

“Oh well! We can play without them.”


Hmph.”

“I don’t care how much you sulk, I’m not letting you spell ‘sewing’ like that. I don’t know where you even got a ‘Þ’ tile.”


“Túrin Turambar in Taur-nu-Fuin with Anglachel.”

“But was it Túrin that killed him or was it Morgoth’s curse acting through-”

“Just open the damn envelope.”

AWWWWW COME HERE SWEETHEART! LEMME HUG THE SAD RIGHT OUT YOU!!!!!

And if my hug isn’t doing anything for you, HAVE THIS LIST OF FLUFF!

“My daddy can beat up your daddy…why are our daddies kissing?” by bleep0bleep

809  I  Kid Fic, Humor

General Audiences

Derek and Stiles are both single parents, and their rival children attempt to make them fight.

Excuse Me While I Spell My Name by TheAlderKing

1,351  I  Stilinski Family Feels, Future Fic

“You’ve got white-out on your diploma. You actually defaced your diploma to keep people from seeing your name?”

“Mmm, couldn’t let the secret out after so many years of keeping it.”

How Stiles got his names.

Misunderstainding by hazelNuts

1,528  I  Misunderstandings

Teen and Up

anonymous asked, “‘i’m in my underpants in a laundromat waiting for my clothes to get washed and your clothes are in the machine next to mine and i noticed that when you put your clothes in they were all covered in blood what the fuck’ au”

Stiles’ evening had been going pretty well. And when a hot guy walks into the laundromat, he thinks it might become great. Until the guy takes off his coat and Stiles sees the state of his clothes.

Crazy Scary Beautiful by Elpie (Horribibble)

1,644  I  Artist Stiles, Misunderstandings

Teen and Up

The guy just came in with a duffle bag full of knives and plopped them down on the counter, easy as you please. He’s standing there with a perfectly cheerful look on his face, bouncing a little on the balls of his feet.

-

In which Stiles Stilinski is probably a serial killer, but Derek falls in love anyway.

Fight Me, Helen by thedevilyousay

1,654  I  Kid Fic, Domestic Fluff

Teen and Up

Important OTP question: Which one aggressively argues with the suburban soccer moms at the PTA meeting and flips Helen’s 9x12 pan of betty crocker brownies?

The Proposal(s) by theroguesgambit

1,677  I  Misunderstandings, Wedding Proposal

Teen and Up

At the honeymoon resort, someone makes the mistake of asking for the proposal story. It’s meant innocently enough, the type of thing most couples are more than happy to gush about.

Stiles snorts into his glass and Derek’s eyes narrow. He makes a pointed noise that’s probably meant as warning, but Stiles just puts down the glass and leans across the table, smirking.

“Which one would you like? We’ve got two hundred and fourteen of them.”

Eyebrows and the Scientific Method by DiscontentedWinter

1,762  I  Derek’s Eyebrows 

Teen and Up

A series of vignettes (and helpful lists and terrible illustrations) about Derek’s eyebrows, and Stiles’s attempts to communicate with them.

Welcome to Rosie’s Diner can I interest you in an eye-opener? by crossroadswrite

1,999  I  Future Fic, Oblivious Idiots in Love

Teen and Up

When the unfairly attractive couple walks in, at their usual hour, Kat starts humming the wedding march.

Jason elbows her sharply in the ribs, trying to hide his snicker even as he waves nicely at them.

“Fuck they’re so pretty,” he sighs mournfully, “why did they have to be a couple, that’s just unfair.”

“I know,” she commiserates.

(Or: The one where Stiles and Derek are regulars at Rosie’s diner and exactly zero of the employees believe they’re not actually a couple, I mean come on look at them.)

We Could Be Happy by alphagottadonk

2,676  I  Scenting, Pack Dynamics

Not Rated

Prompt: Derek starts scenting Stiles who thinks its a pack thing until he sees Scott doing it to Kira.

Snuggle Puppy by medrengirl

2,715  I  Full Shift Werewolves

Teen and Up

Derek likes the soothing voices of NPR. He listens to a story about the 1920s, when “snuggle puppies” engaged in “petting parties.” The reporter on the radio says that these parties allowed teens and college students to engage in “erotic exploration” without devolving into orgies.

Stiles, on the other hand, thinks “snuggle puppy” is a stuffed animal line for pets with separation anxiety, or maybe the title of a kids’ book, and he thinks “petting party” is a great way to describe what happens when Derek comes over to hang out in his full wolf shift.

It takes a bit of time for them to get on the same page.

Scream Like You Mean It by queenravenr

2,839  I  AU-Human, AU-College

Not Rated

prompt- Heard a scream and thought you were getting killed but it was just a spider. college au.

Baseball Pants by Thelionesskim

2,847  I  AU-Baseball

General Audiences

Scott shows Stiles a picture of the new pitcher for the Dodgers, and Stiles is suddenly an avid Dodgers fan.

Concerning Escaped Cats by Sams_Soliloquy

3,444  I  FBI Agent Derek, Star Trek Nerd Stiles

General Audiences

“It’s no surprise really that things hadn’t gone as planned when Stiles tried to shave his cat, Spock.”
A one shot AU involving, Trekkie Stiles, FBI Agent Derek Hale, and a half-shaved cat named Spock.

Chase your own by kellifer_fic

3,648  I  Derek has a Motherfucking Tail

General Audiences

Derek is cursed into having a feels!tail because Deaton and Scott live to mess with him. That’s what he assumes anyway.

Bee Yourself by Hatteress

3,780  I  Werebees, Established Relationship, Crack

Mature

Derek turns the full on Alpha glare on him. The one that says, in no uncertain terms, that the current situation is the furthermost thing from amusing on any planet in any galaxy ever. It’s sorta ruined by the antennae though. And the wings.

OR

The one where Stiles pisses off a bee goddess and Derek’s come tastes like honey.

Falling in Love at a Texas Roadhouse by PriPri

3,875  I  Kid Fic, Dad Derek, Server Stiles

General Audiences

Wherein Derek’s 6-year-old son pimps him out to their server Stiles.

Listen to the Beat by amazingpages

5,561  I  Masturbation, Neighbors

Mature

Of all the things Derek thought he’d have to deal with upon moving into his new apartment, a loudly masturbating neighbor wasn’t one of them.

Six Letter Word for Romance by TroubleIWant

6,322  I  Domestic Fluff (these two assholes are too fucking cute)

Mature

In which Stiles ships Derek/nice things almost as hard as I do

Or

Stiles definitely starts off thinking it’s fucking hilarious that Derek-sourwolf-Hale does crosswords and cares about scuffs on his furniture.

But at a certain point, and he can’t pinpoint exactly when, “fully functional adult couple” somehow becomes a massive fetish of his. Derek in sweats and bare feet, nudging his glasses up his nose while he does the Sunday crossword? Unff. Derek filling out forms to get some renovations on his property approved? Oh God, yes. Derek putting away groceries and bitching that the corner store was out of the right type of Greek yogurt? Take me now, Stiles thinks, worrying at his lower lip with his teeth.

This can’t be normal.

Here Comes Your Man by HaleHole (SweetFanfics)

6,821  I  3/3  I  AU-High School, Pining, Love Confessions

Teen and Up

“Batman? Really?” The familiar voice makes Derek pause, fingers pressing into the spine of his Physics book. He glances over to his left to look at the face that goes with the voice.

Stiles Stilinski is standing next to his locker and talking to him. Better check that actually.

Derek looks behind his open locker, making sure that there’s no one there or standing behind him before he turns back towards the jock. Who is more than amused at Derek’s antics. “I had you pegged for a Marvel fan.” The lacrosse star continues. “But that’s Dick’s run as Batman so maybe you’re just into Nightwing more than Batman.”

all human AU where Stiles and Derek go to BHHS and Kate who?

To Flush With Love and Hide in Flowers by demonicweirdo

7,067  I  AU-Greek Mythology, God Stiles

Teen and Up

“Uh, are you okay?” Derek asked him, his voice soft and calm and just what Stiles needed to hear this whole time.
Stiles groaned, rubbing his head. “No. There are limits to what gods can do. One of them is that using your powers for ten days straight drains you. Completely.” He was never talking to Lydia again. 

I’m Grumpy, He’s Derpy by Fanhag102

7,264  I  Cat Stiles, Cursed Stiles

Teen and Up

The cat jumps up onto the back of the couch and is carefully making it’s way towards Derek only to lose it’s footing halfway across and tumble with an undignified yowl back to the floor.

Oh god, Derek thinks. It’s one of those cats.

How Weetabix Got His Marshmallows Back by calrissian18

10,095  I  AU-Office, AU-Human

Explicit

“You know, in the movie version of this, I won’t have said ‘venereal disease’ and you would be reluctantly charmed.“

Putting the F-U-N in Funeral by apocryphal

10,811  I  AU-Human, Bakery, Snark

Teen and Up

"Hale & Daughters Funeral Home,” Derek says dully.

“Oh ho! And which daughter are you?

Derek casts his eyes up to the ceiling. It’s going to be one of those calls.

(In which Derek is a bored secretary, Stiles is a baker who may or may not have ulterior motives, and there are entirely too many macaroons.)

Snow Flirting by thepsychicclam

11,396  I  Kid Fic, Snowball Fight

Mature

As Beacon Hills get pounded with foot after foot of snow, single dad Stiles can’t quite keep up with his four year old, his job, and shoveling his driveway. Derek makes his teenage son shovel Stiles’ walk, and that just leads to Derek helping Stiles out with a whole bunch of other tasks. That’s okay with Derek, though, cause any chance to be with Stiles is okay with him.

Hot Mess by standinginanicedress

20,458  I  Human Derek, Car Sex

Explicit

“I really -” Stiles rips his hand free of Derek’s and clears his throat, taking stock of all the other things that were in his basket, how strewn all over the floor of the grocery store they are. “…I’m a normal, functioning human being, I swear I am.”

“Right,” Derek says, and his mouth starts quirking up even more. Like he’s amused, and like he absolutely positively does not believe for a second that Stiles is normal.

or the one where Stiles is a literal human disaster that ruins everything, and Derek finds it incredibly attractive.

And if you still need some cute as fuck motherfuckers in your life, I would totally suggest reading the webcomic Check Please and then turning into shipper trash (like me and Angsty) and reading THE FANFICTION FOR IT.

I hope you feel better!!!

Love and internet hugs,

Fluffy Wolf