let me put you in my paper

Before you ask someone who suspects they have a PD why they don’t seek a professional diagnosis let me tell you what I have experienced as someone with a professional BPD diagnosis.

From professionals 

  • A therapist refused to treat me because she didn’t want to deal with a “borderline patient”.
  • A therapist refused to put my BPD on paper because she was worried about how it might affect my future.

  • Upon being informed of my diagnosis a doctor in an inpatient hospital immediately placed me on extra precautions (consequently limiting my freedoms even more) despite me giving literally 0 reasons beyond “I have BPD”

From “friends”

  • A friend responded to me with uncalled for pity and said “I don’t envy you” because she was told that BPD is an impossible illness to handle or even survive.
  • A friend (who is studying psychology) suddenly went quiet and refused to continue the conversation when I revealed my DX to her. She later stated that she didn’t know what to say because she was taught all people with BPD are bad people. She was taught this in the same classes that most mental health professionals will take in some form before going into the field.

  • A friend (who works as a LSW) told me she hated borderline patients and followed that up with a ridiculous amount of ableist slurs.

From psychology teachers

  • “BPD is untreatable”
  • “Borderline patients are impossible/draining/awful/hopeless/etc.”

A lot of this is also said about other cluster B disorders which was not in any way a fun time for me when I was questioning NPD nor is it great knowing I likely having co-morbid HPD.

This is not to say there are no good professionals but it is to say that there are some very good reasons someone may prefer to self-dx and that’s ok. The mental health system is terrifying and fucked up in a lot of ways and if someone doesn’t want to navigate it to get their DX professionally backed up that’s their choice and it’s not up for debate.

Also if you have or suspect you have a PD this is a reminder that PDs are survivable and they are treatable if you want to seek treatment. You’re not a bad person just for having a PD and I’ll fight anyone that says otherwise (ง'̀-‘́)ง  

When Saeran is Mistaken for Saeyoung after Dying His Hair Red Again.
  • Zen: *throws arm around him* So about that Tripter bot! Can I give you some pictures to put on it? ^^
  • Saeran: What are you talking about?
  • Zen: Quit pretending like you don't know, you confessed you were behind it.
  • Saeran: I'm not Saeyoung.
  • Zen: Hahaha, you're so funny.
  • Saeran: And you're a moron.
  • Zen: Oh. You are Saeran.
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Jumin: Get away from Elizabeth the Third. Why the hell are you in my apartment, Saeyoung?! Out!
  • Saeran: Saeyoung told me to come give you this piece of paper. The bodyguards let me in. Your cat likes me. I don't know why.
  • Jumin: Saeyoung sent Saeyoung over? Quit acting, Saeyoung and put her down!
  • Saeran: Here, cat. Be careful getting down. I'm leaving now.
  • Jumin: So easily, Saeyoung?
  • Saeran: *sighs*
  • Elizabeth 3rd: *meows sadly after Saeran*
  • Jumin: That wasn't Saeyoung, was it?
  • Elizabeth 3rd: *meows exasperatedly*
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Yoosung: Hey, Saeyoung, how did you do on LOLOL last night?!
  • Saeran: I'm not Saeyoung.
  • Yoosung: Okay! How did you do on LOLOL last night, other Saeyoung?
  • Saeran: *groans*
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Jaehee: *opens mouth as Saeran walks into cafe*
  • Saeran: I'm not Saeyoung!
  • Jaehee: Can you do mixed coffee drinks if you have a book?
  • Saeran: Uh.
  • Jaehee: That's a yes. I need help. You're hired. Get to work.
  • Saeran: *sighs, again*
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • V: ....
  • Saeran: You can't even see! I'm not Saeyoung!
  • V: Ouch.
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Rika: Hi!
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Vanderwood: ......
  • Saeran: ......
  • Vanderwood: So....
  • Saeran: I'm not Saeyoung.
  • Vanderwood: Right. Sorry about last time! You all look so much alike!
  • Saeran: You're. A. Moron.
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • MC: Hi, Saeran!
  • Saeran: MARRY ME!
  • MC: *confused as to why Saeran is suddenly clinging to her after he visited the others to drop off things Saeyoung had "borrowed" from them*
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Saeyoung: Hi, second Saeyoung!
  • Saeran: I hate all of you.
  • ___________________________________________________________
  • Saeyoung: *secretly told all the members he would be the one visiting them* *troll*
to everyone that suffers from sketchbook anxiety

Let me tell you two things that cured the ‘oh no i’m going to ruin this’ that stems from new sketchbooks / blank canvas.

Fuck it up intentionally

This I learned from my painting professor in college.  He had us blindfold ourselves, and then actually really mess up a perfect blank page, and then use it for the exercises that day.  Like we tore into the paper, made some horrible uncoordinated marks.  We even spit on it.  I highly recommend doing this at least once, because it helps dismantle some of the weird perfectionist hangups that a lot of us put on paper.  Helps get rid of the worry of messing up its perfect potential..

Basically if you’re so worried you’re going to mess it up, mess it up intentionally first so you take back control from the floaty head space anxiety gives us, to your hands and actions.

Buy a shitty ass sketchbook.  

Get one of those sketchbooks made for like 5 year olds that hang out in convenience/drug stores by those wonky ass crayons that never color right.  The type that you touch the paper and know it’ll eat a marker head right off. 

Whenever you look at your ‘good’ sketchbook and feel like you’re going to mess it up, use the terrible one instead.  Now you’re still working and sketching and doing with no real pressure since hey, that sketchbook was a piece of crap anyway and cost you like 5 bucks.  My shitty sketcbooks have some of my favorite stuff in them since I relaxed and let myself explore.  It will also remind you why we bother with nice sketchbooks in the first place because let me tell you that paper is god awful.

A big reason why I gravitated towards digital art when I was younger was because it was almost impossible to ‘mess it up’.  Make a stupid mark? Undo.  Don’t like the initial sketch? Delete the layer.  Hate the whole thing? Don’t save it.   ((I still do all of these things, but now at a much lesser rate))

Take some of the holiness out of your tools.   Realize that its the process that matters most, and keep your eyes forward.  I think especially here on tumblr where a lot of ‘sketches’ that are more towards illustrations that happen to be in a sketchbook build up this head space that everything in your sketchbooks have to be perfect and beautiful.  Sketchbooks are your play areas, where you can fuck around at your heart’s content.   Have some fun with them.  

Hope this helps~


So, at first it was just some sketch to work on my background skills (that are close to zero orz). Then I’ve put a bit of clolors but i’m a lil’ too lazy for shading =v=‘

Since I have nothing to say about it, let me tell you a story, in the french version of One Piece Cavendish is not called “Cabbage” by the strawhat, because a lot of french doesn’t understand english.(i guess) He’s called “caniche” that sounds close to cabbage, and it mean poodle.

Emotional Healing Spell

What You’ll Need: 

-Band-aid or gauze
-Red pen or marker 
-Incense in the most calming scent you can find

To help yourself heal emotionally, first light your incense. One of my favorites is lavender. Take your paper and stick your band-aid on it, or if you have gauze, tape or place it on the paper. Using your red pen or marker, write this: 
“Let this band-aid seal my wounds, 
 Let this incense cleanse me,
 Let peace find me,
 Let grief leave me.” 

When you are done, fold the paper and stick it in the envelope. Put some ash from the incense in the envelope. Put a part of you (hair, eyelash, fingernail, ect.) into the envelope. Seal the envelope and put it under your pillow. Sleep with it under your pillow for one night. The next morning, set the envelope on fire in a safe place. 

Colton Haynes - Grit - photo edit by Mikail Soavi.

“I’m finally in a position where I can say I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I’ve accomplished so much with so little and my smile is finally not forced. I’ve taken control of my own life for the first time and won’t ever let anyone silence me or my passions ever again. I’m finally free. I’m successful. I’m independent. but most of all…I’m outspoken.

Don’t be afraid to seek help. There are so many people out there who put their jobs first and their mental health last…and trust me…it will creep up on you. There are so many amazing people out there who can help with anxiety and other mental health issues…please don’t be afraid and know that it gets better.”

National Suicide Hotline: ‪18002738255

The Trevor Project hotline: ‪18664887386

Excerpt from Colton’s article for Paper Magazines’ Outspoken issue.

To Whomever It May Concern

Every love poem I’ve ever wrote
Every kiss I’ve blown
Flailing in the wind like a stupid child
I took too much

I took everything from anyone that could mutter something that almost sounds like, ‘I love you’
Anything from anyone who would lay beside me
Over and over

Thousands of poems I’ve carved into paper
Declaring myth
Spitefully using pen to manipulate anything in my favor
They were all dedicated to a mirage
Dedicated to things far away
Dedicated to dust

For you
And all the poems you deserve
The world’s poetry
All for you
Young and fragile
All the poetry you could ever need
For you
I cannot change

Put the guns aside
Get out of your head
This isn’t a love poem
It’s just something
To let you know I’m human

if i could
i would put a picture of you on top of my christmas tree
because you are my angel, because you are a star
if i could
i would wrap you up in shiny paper and put a big red bow on the top of your head
because you’re the only gift i want, the ultimate present
if i could
i would write a letter to santa, asking him to let me hitch a ride on his sleigh tonight
because you’re where i want to be, who i want to be with today
—  merry christmas, i miss you
(cc, 2016)

Request: “Ooh! Can you do an imagine where Tim’s s/o sleeps over and Dick can’t pass up this opportunity to make fun of them, but nothing he does works. (They’re both gremlins in the morning.) And then Alfred comes in casually with two mugs of coffee and that’s what finally gets them stirring and Dick’s just kinda like ’??’”

A/N: I enjoyed writing this but I couldn’t get all my ideas and love put on paper so it feels like trash! If you want a redo, let me know

5:20 p.m

“Tim!” Both you and Tim’s attention was caught by Dick. “You never told you had a date, let alone a lover.” Tim closed his eyes in embarrassment, silently groaning. Why did have to use that word? You simply smiled, excited for the plans made with Tim as well being able to see the Wayne Manor.

“Yup.” Tim quickly answered, generously taking your duffle bag and gestured you to follow him. “We’re practically just going to watch Neflix.”

“And chill…?” Dick immediately questioned.

Both you and Tim scoffed and looked at the man, you still smiled, amused by his brother. “No.” He assured. “We aren’t going to “Netflix and chill.” You laughed and continued to follow Tim up to his room. It was warm, you noticed the various tech, pencils and pens, circular coffee stains, and crumbled papers amongst his desk. His bed neat enough to be presentable for guest, and opposite of his bed was his TV, wire cables, and games and it’s systems.

“Messy Tim.” You chuckled.

“I know.”

6:49 p.m.

Spending your entire time in each others company, both of you on your laptops and phones with a bonus of the latest season of Bob’s Burgers being played on his TV. Occasionally, Dick would push the door open, quietly skim the room, you only ignored him. “What are you doing? Get out.” Tim having to tell him.

“Got the Netflix part down.” His brother mumbled only for Tim throw a pillow at him. “Fine, fine. I’m leaving.”

“I’m hungry.” You laughed at the two, finally speaking up, looking up from your screen.

“Hi, Hungry. I’m –” he continued tapping.

“Don’t.” He chuckled at you.

“Well, Alfred is busy so we’ll have to improvise… Without making the kitchen dirty.”

“That’s fine.” Closing your lap as well his, he asked for you to wait but ignored his request.

7:15 p.m.

“Cookies his not an appropriate choice for dinner, Tim.” You watched him place the pan of cookies in the oven.

“Yes, but it’s the best.”

“A sandwich would be more tolerable. Or take out.” You laughed as he hugged you. You hugged him tighter and pecked him.

“Awwwww!” You both see Dick in the doorway, smiling like a child. “You are so cute! Wait don’t move!” He quickly grabbed out his phone. “Now un-hug and do that all over again.”

“Oh, my god.” Tim groaned.

9:40 p.m.

“I’m stealing you hoodie!” You said from Tim’s closet, picking up a burgundy one.

“That’s the third one.” He says, you went back in his room, seeing him lying in his bed, walking in time to catch his phone falling on his face.

“Ohhh, Tim.” You laughed at him, ashamed of witnessing the moment. “How did that happen?” You shook his head.

“Dick keeps messaging me.” He rolled on his stomach and looked at you. “‘Make conversation’, ‘tell them how nice they look’…”

“I look nice in a hoodie?”

“'Do you need condoms?’ He’s been wanting to give me the ‘talk’ lately.”

“He doesn’t know we already have had sex?” You laughed.

“WHAT?!” You both groan at the voice behind the door, Dick pushing himself in the room. “Dick, get out!” You both said.

“Tim! How come you never told me?”

“Why would I tell you?”

“It’s a special moment that should be shared –”

“I’m going to stop you right there. Yes we had sex. Please leave.” Dick sigh, waved at you before closing the door and officially leaving.

“… Your family’s weird.” You told him, tossing yourself in his bed.

2:00 a.m.

“Thank you, Alfred.” You both say, grabbing your own cups of coffee.

“You both should really get some sleep.” He demanded.

“Why should we sleep every night, Alfred?” Tim questioned. “You realize that sleeping takes up half time?”

“It can also lack depression, headaches, hallucinations, muscle aches, memory loss…”

“Mm.” You drunk more your coffee. “I suffer from half the things you just said even with sleep.” The butler just sighed, disappointed with you both but allowed you to enjoy the company of each other why you could. The butler left you both, he needed sleep himself.

3:20 a.m.

What? You both had nothing to do not to mention alone. And Alfred did say get some sleep, what better way to end the night than you both ending up lying in bed sweaty and naked.

10:20 a.m.

“You have to leave so early?” Tim asked you as you finished packing your bag.

“Yes, Tim. I do.” You wrapped your arms his shoulders and his around your waist. “I’m busy and you most definitely know what that’s like. Take a break some time.”

“This was my break.”

“Then I’m coming over more often.” You said rolling your eyes and kissing him goodbye.

“You two are still adorable.”

“Dick…” You groaned.

There was nothing poetic or beautiful about dragging myself out of the hole where you left me. I just wanted to scream words onto paper until I couldn’t feel them pounding at the edges of my mind any longer. I wrote 7 poems about the music of your voice before I could say your name without hearing you scream. And somewhere far away, you are fast asleep while I put my pen to paper and let myself bleed.
—  Poetry At Most

polemicandcontent  asked:

i love your stuff; where do you get your materials (images and other stuff). keep at it!

Hi! Oh wow, I’m so glad that you like my stuff. Thank you!!! As for supplies, I get them from a variety of different sources. Let me link you to the exact supplies I have! (yes exact, I was able to find most of them yay) I’m pretty cheap so everything here (apart from some of the magazines) are less than $20.

I have a good number of people asking me where I got my supplies/what they are so I decided to just put them up for a masterpost. 



($12.99) Peter Pauper Press Essentials Grid Line Journal: x
Cheaper alternative to the traditional moleskines and leuchtturms. Half the price of both, better quality paper than the moleskin + IT IS GRID LINE. 

($10.49) Alphabet Stamps from Michaels: x 
($2.99) Ink Pad from Michaels in Black: x
Bought these thinking I was gonna regret it but god was I wrong. Buy them. They give a cool effect to your entries. Don’t forget to buy an ink pad. It was the cheapest one I could find because ya girl is a college student and you know how that goes. 

(< $10) Assorted Washi Tape: 
Dark Floral Print: x
Wood Grain Print:
Rose Gold Collection: x
Watercolor Girls Collection: x
Thin Rainbow Collection: x

($13.79) Mini Sticky-Notes Marseille Collection: x
I like anything from the Marseille collection because the colors are less fluorescent and more pastel/subdued. Great for adding color to otherwise bland pages.

($12) Zebra Mildliners Pink Pack: x
I don’t think I need to rehash how adorable these are. Highly suggest picking up the other two sets as well. But this one is just my favorite. 

($14.60) Uniball Signo Dx 0.38: x
I cannot and will not live without these pens. 

($8.99) Washi Origami Paper: x
I have a lot of different kinds that I get off of Daiso (which I can’t seem to find an online store for) but origami paper is a great way to decorate your pages~

(99c) Pack of Gluesticks: 
Don’t think I need to link you to this. Just head over to your local 99c store and head over to the crafts section!

I get all my images from magazines. Good thing my family hoards them. Here are some magazines and what I rip apart to put in my journal. I don’t print because I am a nursing student who needs to print out her 100-page syllabus and ink is expensive. 

Time/People Magazine: Cityscapes. Pics of all kinds of people. Social issues. Cars (from the ads). Current events. Personally, my favorite type of magazine to cut from because the images are pretty visionary and reflect on actual issues surrounding this point in time.
Glamour/Vogue/InStyle/Allure: Models, Nifty flat-lays. Sometimes insert those perfume samples in my journal too. There’s tons of photography here of funky photoshoots that would be great to add to your journal. I prefer glamour, allure, in-style and vogue over other mags like cosmopolitan and seventeen because the photoshoots are more mature and aesthetically-pleasing in my opinion. 

Better Homes and Gardens: Flowers. Flowers. And more flowers. (the gardening section of this magazine is great)
National Geographic: Sceneries. Animals. Ocean. Landscape. I love taking full pages from this magazine and using them as backgrounds for some of my more artsy pages.
Outdoor Photography: SCENERIES. These magazines are for would-be photographers so your bound to get some great stuff
FLOW Magazine: So many cute prints and random nifty stuff in every single FLOW magazine. FLOW is dedicated to paper-lovers, so there’s TONS of stuff you can incorporate into your journal
Wedding Magazines: Flowers again. Wedding magazines have tons of floral arrangement ideas. I just cut them out and paste them in my journal. 
Rolling Stone: POPULAR CULTURE. Urban culture. What’s “in” at the time. I like to snip headlines, song titles, etc. etc. in my journal to document the current time. While Time may document the world in a more political standpoint, Rolling Stone gives us that pop-culture view that most of us see on a daily basis.


There you go, a quick overview of my supplies for journaling. As you can see, I mainly make my pages out of random magazine clippings and just kind of maneuver them around until they look decent. 

I hope I was able to help you some <3

And if you every have a entry that you’re particularly proud of, please don’t hesitate to send it to me. I would love to see your beautiful work!

Happy journaling~


anonymous asked:

Mum! MUM! AfabNBPerson again! I ordered a new bed with my Nan and since she was paying, the only thing my name had to be on was the delivery papers and stuff, so I got to put Mx down (bank won't let me have that on my card, sadly) and I'd forgotten about it until I got the delivery text which said Mx -myname- we will be delivering at blahblahblah AND IT MADE ME SO VERY HAPPY!! The delivery people will address me as Mx and not Miss! AND I GET A NEW BED RATHER THAN A MATTRESS ON THE FLOOR NOW!


Not a Monster

Waking into the room you find that it’s empty. The kitchen is never empty at this time of day, the Avengers go through food like most people go through toilet paper. Speaking of which you needed to order more of that too. You sigh softly, in a group of superheroes, whose rank includes, two super soldiers, two genius’, three super spies, a woman with telekinetic powers, a super speedster, a king, a Norse god and a- former AI. What was the best way to describe Vision? It was shocking how no one could seem to get anything done. You add ‘toilet paper (and not that one ply shit Tony)’ to the list of the things the tower needs. You turn back around and let out a startled gasp.
“Oh my god. Bucky.” You say softly, you thought Steve moved like a cat but Bucky must move like a ghost. “You scared me.” You laugh softly until you notice the gun he’s put on your side of the counter. “Bucky?”
“Are you making the shopping list?” He asks seemingly unaware that he’s done anything strange.
“Yea, there something you need?” He’s stepped further away from the counter, the gun still resting there, butt toward you in case you need to grab it quickly.
“Yea, watermelon.” He says softly, like he’s embarrassed by it.
“I didn’t know you like watermelon.”
“It’s my favorite fruit. It’s still a fruit right?” You’d been the one who’d informed him that a tomato was no longer classified as a vegetable. You chuckle softly.
“Yea. It’s still a fruit.” You turn back to the list and write ‘watermelon’. “Do you just want one?”
“Please.” You nod then glance down at the gun.
“Done.” You say looking at the gun again in confusion. You’ve noticed this before, he’s actually handed you the weapon before. It’s only when it’s the two of you in the room, if Steve is there you don’t get a gun, or knife. Steve does. Bucky’s watching you carefully and you hop up onto the counter, the marble is cold on the back of your legs. You study him for a second, he’s watching you watch him, both of you sitting in silence in the kitchen. He cocks his head to the left and squints his eyes at you. You let out a breathy laugh.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” He asks softly.
“Like what?”
“I don’t know. Weird. I thought you were over the whole metal arm thing.”
“I am.” You answer honestly. You kind of forget about it until he does something crazy like stick it in a fire or pull a hot pan out of the oven.
“Then what?”
“What’s up with the gun?” He glances down at it like he’s just realized its there. “I’ve noticed this before. You’ve physically handed it to me, as well as a knife but if Steve is in the room the weapon goes to him. Why?”
“Hydra.” He practically spits the word. Anger dashes across his face and you regret asking.
“Can you help me down?” You ask softly and he furrows his brow at you but you know he’ll come help you, it’s that classic gentleman in him. Sure enough a moment later he comes around the island and eases you to the floor. You catch his metal arm in your hand and pass him back the gun. “You don’t need to arm me.” You say softly, “I trust you.”
“You shouldn’t.” You take his face in your hands and look into his sad blue eyes.
“I am not afraid of you James Barnes.”
“You should be. I’m a monster.”
“Oh, you poor thing.” You mutter then, raising up onto your toes, pull his body flush against yours. You wrap your arms around his neck and rest your head in the space below his chin. You don’t say anything and he doesn’t move for a little bit. Then suddenly his hands slowly creep around your waist, holding you possessively to him. How long has it been since someone just held him? Just hugged him and let them know they care? Poor Bucky. “You’re not a monster,” you whisper, “they don’t control you anymore. You get to choose what to become.” You go to move away but he doesn’t release you.
“Can- can you just stay there for a minute?” He asks softly.
“Of course. Tell me you’re not a monster.”
“You’re not a monster.”
“I’m not a monster.” He’s not a monster.

The Signs as Even Weirder Things My Friends Have Said to Me
  • Aries: I'm, uh...53% virgin.
  • Taurus: I had a dream where Jon Krakauer and I went to Disney World and now I'm scared about my inner demons.
  • Gemini: I hate children. They're too sticky.
  • Cancer: Paper isn't flammable unless you put alcohol on it!
  • Leo: The cat down the street wants to assassinate my goldfish and I just can't let that happen.
  • Virgo: How dare you presume me heterosexual!
  • Libra: Draco Malfoy is going to make me drink. He's ridiculous.
  • Scorpio: You're the poster child for strawberry addiction.
  • Capricorn: I want to study your mind. It's my hobby.
  • Aquarius: Can you get sick from licking a Polaroid by accident because I fucked up
  • Pisces: Do it for the aesthetic.
The Story Of Why I Nearly Blew A Gasket Today

[Enter hardworking, highly motivated, artistically talented young lady soon to be graduating.]

Student: Mr, is there a way I can pull my grade up so I can have all A’s this semester?

Me: Let’s see… yep, you’ve got a zero for an assignment right there. Here, do this alternate assignment and I’ll replace the zero. That should boost your grade those last few points.

[That afternoon]

Me (texting student): Hey, so I replaced that 0 and you’re at a 91 now!

Student: Wow, thanks!

Me: [Continues grading papers.]

Me: [Gets to the class assignment from today.]

Me: [Doesn’t have a paper with Student’s name on it]

Me: [puts the 0 in]

Me: [Watches Student’s grade drop to an 88]


Originally posted by etudiant-en-ph2

Fools Fall in Love (Trixya 50s AU) 1/8 - Vixen

So this went in a total different direction than I had planned, but I’ll work it out. Hopefully people like it anyway, Im really happy with it tbh, I put a lot of time researching different things for it and hopefully that comes across. Let me know what you think, it makes my day, it really does. Ill be posting outfits and stuff on my main Tumblr here if anyones interested.

So just a wee note “its snowing down south” basically means a womans slip was showing, pretty obvious in context but I thought id mention.

Links -

Trixie’s song Katya’s song

Keep reading

i’m still salty about those posts from december going around like “trans people go get paperwork/forms/etc. for gender change before trump is sworn in” as if 1. i can just go to the secretary of state and be done 2. if i have a piece of paper that says “Gender: F” suddenly all transphobia goes away and 3. transitioning is just a thing you can quick do one weekend and not a long process

RUN Comics Oct 2013 - April 2016. ink on paper. 8.5x11.9in. 2017

This is the front cover for my upcoming self published release of RUN Comics. The book will be a collection of all the zines/comics I did under RUN Comics. It totals 300 pages and includes 23 small press books. I started this project when I moved to Chicago and did it for 3 years. Really excited to put them all in one place!

Going to be printing it myself in time for Chicago Zine Fest!

If you want to preorder a copy let me know! I’m going to print 100 copies and it’s going to be expensive. Or please buy one from me after they’re done.

On a side note - I’m going to be having hernia surgery on March 31 and will be out of work for a month! I’ll be doing more posts about selling some paintings and drawings, stay tuned!

See one of the things I love about Sadie, is who she has made me. And who I am in her company. Without her and thanks to you actually, Nightmares, I was quite the monster hunter. Yes, Sadie met me on my last day as the boogeyman to boogeymen. I saw her and put in my papers. So if you think taking Sadie away from me and then throwing a bunch of monsters my way will scare me, I’ll let you in on this…it is a thing I cherish and appreciate that I will get to show these monsters and animals how little i care for them when Sadie is not around. Relive the good old days until Sadie and I reunite. Am I scared? No! I am excited to see if I still got it! And guess what, I’ve still got it! I’ll take the skeleton first and use his bones to take the rest of you. That’s my plan but I’ll play it by ear. They all have bones as the skeleton pointed out, so we’ll see who’s I use!
—  Frank Doyle, #219 Beyond Belief : It’s a mad, mad, mad, mad, mad, mad, mad world
Sorry For Wilting Your Flower

Why do you put that flower in between the pages of a book? Crushing its body and letting its fluid seep through the papers’ pores. Have you noticed the stains it left of what it used to be?

Silence enveloped the world. My world.

It may seem that I speak but I’m really not sure.

But I must have said that the flower is an offering you gave for whatever reason you have intended. As I received it, haven’t I got all the right to do what I want with it? Burn it if it pleases me? Shred it to bits and make it a palette on my wall? Let the stains be a reminder of this day when you haven’t failed to remember what am I? Of who am I.

After all, it’s what you did to my heart.

That’s what I have said.
But then again, you might have forgotten to listen.

At least the wilted flower stayed.