let me love you dan

Get Rekt | Dan Howell

Hello! This is a short fanfic about Dan Howell based on the request below. I hope you enjoy it and let me know what you think!

Y/N was on her way to her friend Dan’s house, they’d agreed to hang out this afternoon a week ago already. She was wearing her usual winter outfit; a pink sweater over a cute skater dress and some tights thick enough to keep her warm tucked into her black chelsea boots. Her style was different from many of her friends but she liked it this way. The cab stopped in front of Dan’s apartment and after paying the driver she got out, ringing the doorbell. Soon enough she heard what sounded like someone stumbling, or falling, down the stairs and the door swung open. “Y/N, welcome!” Dan exclaimed happily and pulled her into a hug. She reciprocated the embrace and was greeted by his cologne. Not bad. She walked into the large house and Dan closed the door behind her. “How did you not freeze to death out there in a dress?” He asked, making his way up the stairs behind her. “Shut up.” She replied with a chuckle, opening the door to the apartment as she reached it.

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the foxes as things i’ve said to my puppy

Allison: “don’t fucking touch me”

Renee: “we. are. friends.”

Matt: “why won’t you let me love you?”

Dan: “aw, you wanna go out? you- YOU LIED TO ME”

Andrew: “your ability to look cute is the only thing keeping you alive”

Aaron: “stop talking to me” 

Neil: *under attack of love and death simultaneously* “this, this is fine”

Kevin: “can’t even get the fucking ball, fucking worthless little-” or *clutching vodka* “this is not for you. this is mine. gtfo.”

Nicky: *crying* “you are the only thing good in this world”

Wymack: “i didn’t ask to have you, but we’re stuck with each other now”

Seth: “we’ve been seeing each other a lot lately and i think we need some time apart so i don’t stab you to death” 

bonus: 

Jean: “this is your side and this is mine and dON’T yOu fUCKing dARe-”

genuinely the “phandom” is so toxic like I feel like I can’t even say I watch Dan and Phil because I don’t want to be associated with this army of immature people who comment “phandom where u at” on every god forsaken video on youtube and somehow make them related to everything

My future

One of the things that i want to do this year is to start my own youtube channel so i can do what i want like do random things such as talk in front of a camera all alone acting all weird and don’t knowing what to do with myself, do covers with my bad voice and guitar but hope that people still enjoy it, do some weird sociallization with amazing people, play some weird games and having people laughing about my weird expressions and finally making the difference in people’s lives like my favorite people (aka D&P and a few artists) do.

That’s the greatest thing that would happen to me, IF I COULD AFFORD A FUCKING CAMERA 😂😂😂

Stretch Mark Insecurity

Anon request: Hey! Would you be able to do a smut based off the tumblr answer Dan did about finding things like stretch marks and bruises attractive. Maybe y/n could be complaining about her stretch marks on her thighs to dan and maybe showing him and things get smutty? Idk! Love your account! X

If you are not aware of the Tumblr post this beautiful Anon is talking about, this is what was said:

Anon (to Dan): if a girl has a lot of stretch marks, does that make her unattractive? :/
Danisnotonfire: no i’m quite weird (orami?) in that I like things like scars/bruises/veins/dark eyes etc

I would just like to add that no one should ever feel self-conscious about stretch marks. They are extremely common with all people, male and female. I see them as a decoration, streamers of life that add interest to plain skin. xxoo
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dan never knew why you always had to be under the blankets with the lights turned off while you made love. He didn’t know about your biggest insecurities and you liked it this way. But obviously all secrets end up revealed at some point during such a close relationship.

You were having a lazy day together, watching movies and playing video games.
It all started with Dan leaving soft kisses on your neck, leaving his mark as he went. Now you were in a heated kissing session as you straddled his lap.
Dan gracefully lifted your top over your head, instantly reattaching his lips to yours. His skilful fingers started to undo the buttons of your jeans before you stopped him.
“Not here…” You say to him
“Why not? It’s only us here”
“It just.. It’s bright in here. And there’s no sheets..” You answer shyly
“It’s too hot for sheets, love” Dan informs you
“I just.. I can’t” you whisper as you look down
“What’s wrong Y/N? You know I love you.. So fucking much. So why won’t you ever let me see you when we make love?” Dan questioned as he cupped your face with his warm hand… Busted. You knew you’d have to tell him one day, but you wanted to avoid it for as long as possible.
“I don’t want you to be grossed out by me…” You admitted
“What!? Y/n that is ridiculous! Why on earth would I be grossed out?” Dan asked, his face a mixture of shock and confusion.
You tried your hardest to fight the tears from your eyes, but one tear managed to escaped, rolling down your flushed cheek.
“Oh god, baby. Please don’t cry. I have no idea what you are so worried about… You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen and nothing will ever change that” he complimented as he wiped away your tear with his thumb.
You took a deep breathe before standing up, slowly sliding your jeans down your legs. For the first time ever, your thighs were revealed, decorated by numerous stretch marks. You couldn’t bring your self to look up at Dan. You just imagined his face, distraught with disgust… But that image left when he let out a shaky breath and spoke
“F-fuck that’s sexy”
Your head flew up, and you were shocked with the view before you.
Dan sat, looking at your thighs as he palmed himself through his jeans.
“What?” You asked, concussion coating your voice.
Without answering, Dan reached out and pulled you closer by the back of your legs.
He ran his long fingers over the marks then leaning in and leaving wet kisses all over them. You never knew how it felt to be kissed there, and the pleasure was shocking. You couldn’t help the little whimpers that left your lips.
“Your not grossed out?” You breathed out
“Fuck no! You are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen and this only adds to the list of things to love about you. Your stretch marks are so fucking sexy y/n. I don’t ever want you to think differently. They honestly turn me on so much” Dan admitted, looking up into your eyes as he continued to run his fingers across them.
“I love you” you whispered before Dan pulled you back down to his lap, hands still stroking your thighs lovingly. He kissed your lips
“I love you more”
You could feel that his semi had quickly turned to a full on, throbbing erection. You never expected him to like your marks but he did, and it was painfully obvious.
Dan moved so that he was now hovering over you on the sofa. He started to kiss down your body, once he got to the elastic of your panties he tugged them down your legs. Your stomach felt on fire as he kissed your thighs once again, loving the un-adventured part of your body.
“So sexy” he whispered to himself.
You had never experienced cunnalingus so you weren’t sure what to expect. But as Dan took a long lick up your folds your were instantly overcome with bliss
“D-Dan” you moaned out as one of his thumbs circled your clit and the other unconsciously continued to stroke your stretch marks.
Dan’s tongue entered you and it wasn’t long before you were coming undone.
“Mmm” Dan moaned, loving the taste of you as he cleaned up your release with his broad tongue.
He left one last kiss on your clit before standing up and undoing his restricting jeans…
You could have never anticipated the love making that was followed. There was not way you were walking for the next few days.
You both spent the night on the sofa, cuddled up as Dan continued to love the feeling of your finally loved, decorative marks, dawning your soft thighs.

my biggest fear in life is that by the time I finally get the money to go to playlist live or vidcon, dan and phil will have stopped doing youtube

Soap

A/N: To the anon who sent this prompt: F off, you’ve now made me even more addicted to Mel M. Jk I frickin love this prompt. I just hit 1,000 followers. S2g y’all are crazy for following me. 

Based on this Prompt

Song: Soap ~ Melanie Martinez

Summary: Dan and Phil are friends with benefits and one night, during sex, Dan accidentally tells Phil he loves him

Warnings: Smut, Some angst, Very extremely slight mentions of self harm

Word Count: 1262


Phil pushed me hard into the wall, feeling up and down my sides while harshly kissing my neck. I could feel his wet hair slightly dripping on my skin, as he had just come out of the shower. He pushed his body closer to mine, resulting in the towel on his waist to come sliding off. 

“You’re so sexy, Dan.” Phil whispered making me moan.

Phil and I had many reckless nights just like this. For the last 2 years, we had been messing around whenever one of us was feeling a bit horny. We were basically what you would call “friends with benefits.” At least that was what Phil had been telling everyone who questioned the dark purple marks covering my neck the following mornings.

My thoughts were taken back into the current situation when I felt Phil palming me through my jeans.

“Phil.” I bit down into his shoulder.

Phil then released me from the wall and guided us over to his bed. With a gentle shove, I fell onto the colourful duvet, engulfed by his scent. Soon, he was back to attacking my neck and working on getting off my belt. It never did it’s job until I was literally about to be fucked. 

With all the practice though, Phil had everything thing slipped off of me with ease and now had the freedom to palm me without anything being in the way. 

Although these were my favourite kind of nights, I often wished that Phil wanted to just be together and not fuck each other senseless. Sure, we basically did everything together from watching anime to editing gaming videos, but sometimes I just wanted to be with him. To cuddle and have really deep conversations like we once had. 

I could feel Phil push his index finger into me and finding my prostate within a few seconds. We had been doing this for so long that he knew everything on how to pleasure me. 

“I’m ready for another.”

Phil didn’t hesitate to push another finger deep into me scissoring around for a few minutes and letting me adjust to the feeling.

I took a second to look at him to finding him doing exactly the same. Damn, was he beautiful. His face full of lust and desire made me feel so lucky, but I was selfish. I wanted Phil. Not like this. I wanted him to be mine. I wanted him to tell every person he met that he was mine and I was his.

“You ready?” I nodded.

He quickly poured some lube into his hand rubbing it all over his shaft and then slowly pushing into me. No matter how many times we did this or how rough he was during foreplay, he was always gentle at this part. He always made sure I was never hurt.

“You can move, Phil.” I mumbled.

Phil, at a slow rate, thrusted in and out of me, moaning out my name. As he started to pick up speed, he took my length into his hand, giving me a little needed friction.

“Dan. You’re so tight.”

Letting out multiple grunts and moans, Phil’s thrust were getting sloppy, letting me know he was close. Another moan of my name and Phil was riding out his orgasm. Phil then put his focus back onto the shaft in his hand while still moving inside of me. In no time at all, I close to reaching my high.

“Phil, I’m close.”

“Come for me.” I grunted at his words.

“Phil, I love you!” I screamed finally hitting orgasm while Phil had still been rubbing and thrusting giving me insane pleasure. 

The feeling didn’t last long because the moment I opened my eyes I saw Phil’s awestruck face and then realized what I had said. He quickly pulled out, his eyes still on me.

“I’-I’m sorry.” I said before I rushed out of his bedroom, locking myself in the bathroom across the hallway.

I slid down the door before throwing my head into my hands sobbing fiercely. What had I done? I admitted the one thing that I never should have. My best friend will now leave me forever. I screwed everything up. How could I have been so stupid.

I let myself cry for a few minutes before deciding that a bath seemed really appealing at the moment. I turned on the water and watched it spill into the tub below. I grabbed the bottle of soap and poured some of it into the water.

I looked back at the door. Deep down I had hoped that Phil would come knocking and confessing his love back, but obviously I was wrong. Phil never loved me. I had ruined everything. I had made that one thing I loved most in the world hate me. 

Once the tub was mostly filled, I stepped in being taken into a fog of bubbles. I never wanted to leave. I didn’t want to come out of this bathroom to face the wrath that was waiting for me on the other side of that door. 

Steam was slightly flying upwards from the water, but I felt so cold. I felt so empty. Never in my life had I ever wanted to take something back so badly. I leaned my head against the wall of the tub, closing my eyes in attempt to relax. To my surprise, the bath had actually helped me relax and soon I was taken into a state of sleep. 

..

I was awoken to the sound of furious knocking on the bathroom door.

“Dan! Dan! Please!”

Phil.

“Dan! Open the door!”

He sounded so mad. Fear overtook my body and I hugged my legs, curling into a ball.

“Dan! Please. I’m so worried.” Then I heard quiet sobs coming from the door.

I quickly got out of the tub, not even letting it drain and wrapping a towel around myself.

I came closer to the door and as I did the sobs became even louder. Phil was crying. My sweet Phil. I carefully unlocked the door.

“Dan?” A voice beamed and the door swung opened. “Dan!”

I suddenly had arms wrapped around me.

“Dan, you’re okay.” Phil sobbed even harder.

“I’m fine. Why were you so worried?”

“Because you were crying and when you didn’t come out for almost 3 hours, I came to the door to ask if you were okay. When you didn’t respond for another half an hour, I just freaked out. I thought you’d maybe hurt yourself or something. I-I’m so so sorry.”

I lightly chuckled as I let Phil cry in my arms.

“I’m sorry I worried you. I kinda feel asleep in the tub.” Pointing to the bath I made, now with deflated bubbles.

“Thank god.” Phil breathed. “I love you.”

I went into a little bit of shock. Had he actually said that? Was I imagining things?

“What?”

“I love you.” Phil said now looking at me.

“You mean that?”

“I’m sorry I didn’t say it earlier.”

He slipped both his hands into mine.

“I was shocked and I wasn’t sure if I was just going insane and you hadn’t actually told me you loved me. I love you, Dan.”

“Phil.” I was now letting a few tears fall down my cheeks.

“I’ve always had. I’d never thought you’d feel the same and I let my fear get the best of me.”

It looked like he was going to continue, but I placed my lips on his. I didn’t want to talk anymore.

“Can we cuddle?” I asked and Phil smiled.

"Love, let me teach you"

Most would find it boring, yet it was honestly one of your favourite ways to pass the time.
You loved watching your best friend play video games, his concentration unbreakable as his fingers moved the analog sticks quickly, bashing buttons at the same time.

You had always envied his skill, wishing you could be anywhere close to as skilled as he was. Which is why you had spent months saving and finally bought a gaming console yourself.
You spent all of your free time alone, practising and always ending up buried in deep frustration.

Dan was worried about the fact that you were spending less time with him. He thought he might have upset you somehow or that he was losing his closest friend.

He really started to panic when you stopped replying to his texts, and so he got his wallet and phone, and he was at your front door within that very hour.

He knocked a few times but was never answered. The door was unlocked so he knew someone was home and without a second thought he walked straight in.

He checked your room first, then the kitchen.

“No no no” your voice sounded from the living room. Dan jogged quickly to the room, needing to make sure you were okay. But the moment he saw you he couldn’t hold back his smirk.

You were so deep in focus, leaning forward on the seat, yet you were still doing so bad.
Dan had to hold back a giggle as he watched from the door frame. However when you growled in frustration Dan lost control and the laughter escaped.

You jumped at his voice, having no idea he was there.

“Oh my god! You scared me Dan!” You exclaimed with a hand on your chest.

Dan laughed as he walked over and sat beside you on the sofa. You became shocked as he pulled you onto his lap and wrapped his arms around you.

“Dan… What are you doing?”

“Love, let me teach you” he purred into your ear. The rumbling of his chest as he spoke made goosebumps rise all over your body.

Arms around you and controller in hand, Dan restarted the level. You watched his large hands move around, wondering what else he could do with them.. Wait… What?

Butterflies went crazy in your belly as it finally hit you, how close you were to Dan.. Well, you were literally sat on top of him… With his arms around you.

“Is this what you’ve been doing lately?” Dan questions without looking away from the screen.

“Yeah” you breath out the word as you crane your neck to look up at him.

“Why?” He asks while you look up and admire his features.

“Because I wanted to be able to play games too… But now I’m realising I’m much happier watching you”

“Yeah?” Dan replies as he looks away from the screen and into your eyes, his face just inches from yours.

“Yeah” you reply

“Well I’d rather do this than play video games” Dan says before slowly leaning in and connecting his lips the your own.

Never Have I Ever

Prompt: High School!AU. Dan and Phil are on the borderline between friends with benefits and boyfriends. A group of friends are playing Never Have I Ever(which is really fun game-play it with a bunch of your friends) and Dan says ‘Never have I ever made love’ and Phil pulls him away and is like ‘what the fuck dude’

Words: 1,130

Genre: Fluff

Warning: Swearing, mentions of sexual contact, drinking

Even in his almost drunk faze, Dan could see very feature about Phil that had made the younger male fall head over heels in love with the ebony haired senior.

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Multiple Make-Ups

Summary: Dan often has to make up for his actions concerning Phil. Pure shameless Phan fluff, sweet enough to rot your teeth

The Cactus Drawing Incident

Dan and Phil had only just gotten home after doing their latest radio show. Dan was a little confused at his boyfriend’s behavior towards the end of the show, especially over the whole ‘cactus thing’. If people began to put two and two together then it could be bad.

“Phil, you do realize you asked Mollie that cactus question live for the world to hear, right?”

“Well I needed advice,” Phil replied with a pout, shuffling over to the couch.

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Part 2:

Part 1: x

Hey guys, It’s Sarah! I hope you like Part 2 of this little blurb! Please don’t forget to request personally because I am always looking for ideas on what to write. Thank you so much and let’s get right to it shall we?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I am going to get a drink b-r-b” I rushed out of the room so quickly I didn’t even give Dan the chance to answer.

For my best of luck the kitchen was empty but not for long, someone seemed to have followed me.

“Hey hey hey look who is here”  Samantha said in an arrogant way. As she walked, her high heels clicked on the kitchen floor. She was holding a full glass of red whine. Is she drunk? Does that mean she is going to be nicer or ten times worse? My question was about to get answered.

“Why are you here in the kitchen you little slut? Wait.. let me guess” she tapped her forehead like she was thinking.

“You are Dan and I’s new little maid! That’s it! You probably need some money since your dress looks like it comes from the thrift store.”

Tears started falling down my cheeks. If only my mouth said what I was thinking, if only I could react and do something about it.

“ Ohh… don’t start crying slutty maid I have a job for you” She said as she grabbed my cheek, I pulled away. She tilted her glass of whine making it all dramatically fall to the floor.

“Pick it up!” She demanded as the threw a paper towel at me, I refused. “ You don’t want me to tell Dan you have been bad to me.. it’s a privilege you even get to see him” she bragged like he was a toy on her display.

I couldn’t lose Dan, I wouldn’t bare myself so I knelt down and started to clean the mess up.

“Hahaha oh my god that’s what you deserve you bitch! Trying to get my boyfriend it’s so ridiculous”

I let a little whimper come out of my mouth as I continued to scrub the floor.

She leaned down next to me “Why are you so sad? You will never get to fuck Dan Howell?” “Hahah to bad” she started to laugh uncontrollably until a big shadow towered in front of us.

Someone pulled my arm and put me behind its back. It all happened so quickly , but as soon as I gained my senses of what was going on I realized It was Dan himself.

“Samantha get out.” He said in a serious tone, his eyes were flaming with anger.

“But Babe-”

“Get Out!” He yelled. Samantha started crying as she left the room.

Dan turned to face me. There was a long silence until he wrapped his arms around me and gave me a long embrace.

“Y/N Don’t let anyone hurt you like that. You should have told me…” he said softly taking in what happened.

“Why would you care?” I bluntly responded.

Dan seemed surprised by the question and took time to answer it.

“ Because I realized that I love you Y/N, more than a friend. You always lighten up the mood when you enter the room, your smile gives happiness to everyone that’s around you and your eyes… give me life. I knew you were to good for me and that you probably didn’t feel the same way so I tried to forget you by getting a girlfriend”

“Samantha….” I murmured.

“Yes, but it didn’t feel the same. It felt a piece within me was missing and that was you, Y/N” He let me go and looked at me expecting a response.

“Dan, I love you too and I always did..” I can’t believe I said that. I felt my cheeks heating up, I was blushing very hard. I looked down at the floor but dan lifted my  chin up with a careful touch.

He leaned in until his sweet chapped lips touched mine. I felt sparks fly everywhere inside me, This was meant to be.
When we pulled away Dan reached out and hugged me again.

“I wanted to do that for so long” he said sincerely.

“Yes!!! I knew it! I ship you guys so much!! Marcus!! Come here you need to give me those $60 you promised!!! I won the bet!!!” Louise yelled as she started skipping happily through the hallway.

Obsession it takes control,
Obsession it eats me whole.
I can’t say the words out loud,
So in a rhyme I wrote you down.
Now you’ll live through the ages,
I can feel your pulse in the pages.

I have written you down
Now you will live forever
And all the world will read you
And you will live forever
In eyes not yet created
On tongues that are not born
I have written you down
Now you will live forever

Your body lies upon the sheet,
Of paper and words so sweet.
I can’t say the words,
so I wrote you into my verse.
Now you’ll live through the ages,
I can feel your pulse in the pages.

I have written you down
Now you will live forever
And all the world will read you,
And you will live forever
In eyes not yet created
On tongues that are not born
I have written you down
Now you will live forever

I have read her with these eyes,
I’ve read her with these eyes,
I have held her in these hands.

I have written you down,
Now you will live forever.
The virtues in the verse,
And you will live forever.

I have written you down
Now you will live forever
And all the world will read you
And you will live forever
In eyes not yet created
On tongues that are not born
I have written you down
Now you will live forever

-BΔSTILLE, Poet




[ONE-SHOT] {CISSWAP} JINX

Title: jinx

Rating: NC-16

Warnings: crude language, wet dreams, rule 63 (cisswap)

Genre: romance, slice of life, rule 63 (cisswap)

Pairing: cisswap!phan

Characters: afab cisgirl!d & afab agender!p

Summary: 2009. An organised chaos, and Phil was the center of it all. And she didn’t find it in herself to mind.

A/N: all phanfic authors have to go through this one way or another (hehe) this is my take on phan’s 2009 timeline. Inspired heavily by the song “Jinx” by DNCE.

Credits: smut scene written by @lesteresce​ my hoe-norary best friend (snort). Chat scene contributed by Meifang.

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