let me love you dan

the foxes as things i’ve said to my puppy

Allison: “don’t fucking touch me”

Renee: “we. are. friends.”

Matt: “why won’t you let me love you?”

Dan: “aw, you wanna go out? you- YOU LIED TO ME”

Andrew: “your ability to look cute is the only thing keeping you alive”

Aaron: “stop talking to me” 

Neil: *under attack of love and death simultaneously* “this, this is fine”

Kevin: “can’t even get the fucking ball, fucking worthless little-” or *clutching vodka* “this is not for you. this is mine. gtfo.”

Nicky: *crying* “you are the only thing good in this world”

Wymack: “i didn’t ask to have you, but we’re stuck with each other now”

Seth: “we’ve been seeing each other a lot lately and i think we need some time apart so i don’t stab you to death” 


Jean: “this is your side and this is mine and dON’T yOu fUCKing dARe-”

a wholesome thought: phil out of the blue holding dans face real gentle in his hands and making dan look into his eyes and dan’s giggling and trying to move away and pushing at his chest playfully and phils laughing but keeps trying to stop and pull a serious face and he’s just like “hey dan… no dan dan listen to me…. hey dan i love you !!! dan listen to me i love you!!!” and dans like bfkhj i know let me goo and theyre just giggling and in love 

Stretch Mark Insecurity

Anon request: Hey! Would you be able to do a smut based off the tumblr answer Dan did about finding things like stretch marks and bruises attractive. Maybe y/n could be complaining about her stretch marks on her thighs to dan and maybe showing him and things get smutty? Idk! Love your account! X

If you are not aware of the Tumblr post this beautiful Anon is talking about, this is what was said:

Anon (to Dan): if a girl has a lot of stretch marks, does that make her unattractive? :/
Danisnotonfire: no i’m quite weird (orami?) in that I like things like scars/bruises/veins/dark eyes etc

I would just like to add that no one should ever feel self-conscious about stretch marks. They are extremely common with all people, male and female. I see them as a decoration, streamers of life that add interest to plain skin. xxoo

Dan never knew why you always had to be under the blankets with the lights turned off while you made love. He didn’t know about your biggest insecurities and you liked it this way. But obviously all secrets end up revealed at some point during such a close relationship.

You were having a lazy day together, watching movies and playing video games.
It all started with Dan leaving soft kisses on your neck, leaving his mark as he went. Now you were in a heated kissing session as you straddled his lap.
Dan gracefully lifted your top over your head, instantly reattaching his lips to yours. His skilful fingers started to undo the buttons of your jeans before you stopped him.
“Not here…” You say to him
“Why not? It’s only us here”
“It just.. It’s bright in here. And there’s no sheets..” You answer shyly
“It’s too hot for sheets, love” Dan informs you
“I just.. I can’t” you whisper as you look down
“What’s wrong Y/N? You know I love you.. So fucking much. So why won’t you ever let me see you when we make love?” Dan questioned as he cupped your face with his warm hand… Busted. You knew you’d have to tell him one day, but you wanted to avoid it for as long as possible.
“I don’t want you to be grossed out by me…” You admitted
“What!? Y/n that is ridiculous! Why on earth would I be grossed out?” Dan asked, his face a mixture of shock and confusion.
You tried your hardest to fight the tears from your eyes, but one tear managed to escaped, rolling down your flushed cheek.
“Oh god, baby. Please don’t cry. I have no idea what you are so worried about… You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen and nothing will ever change that” he complimented as he wiped away your tear with his thumb.
You took a deep breathe before standing up, slowly sliding your jeans down your legs. For the first time ever, your thighs were revealed, decorated by numerous stretch marks. You couldn’t bring your self to look up at Dan. You just imagined his face, distraught with disgust… But that image left when he let out a shaky breath and spoke
“F-fuck that’s sexy”
Your head flew up, and you were shocked with the view before you.
Dan sat, looking at your thighs as he palmed himself through his jeans.
“What?” You asked, concussion coating your voice.
Without answering, Dan reached out and pulled you closer by the back of your legs.
He ran his long fingers over the marks then leaning in and leaving wet kisses all over them. You never knew how it felt to be kissed there, and the pleasure was shocking. You couldn’t help the little whimpers that left your lips.
“Your not grossed out?” You breathed out
“Fuck no! You are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen and this only adds to the list of things to love about you. Your stretch marks are so fucking sexy y/n. I don’t ever want you to think differently. They honestly turn me on so much” Dan admitted, looking up into your eyes as he continued to run his fingers across them.
“I love you” you whispered before Dan pulled you back down to his lap, hands still stroking your thighs lovingly. He kissed your lips
“I love you more”
You could feel that his semi had quickly turned to a full on, throbbing erection. You never expected him to like your marks but he did, and it was painfully obvious.
Dan moved so that he was now hovering over you on the sofa. He started to kiss down your body, once he got to the elastic of your panties he tugged them down your legs. Your stomach felt on fire as he kissed your thighs once again, loving the un-adventured part of your body.
“So sexy” he whispered to himself.
You had never experienced cunnalingus so you weren’t sure what to expect. But as Dan took a long lick up your folds your were instantly overcome with bliss
“D-Dan” you moaned out as one of his thumbs circled your clit and the other unconsciously continued to stroke your stretch marks.
Dan’s tongue entered you and it wasn’t long before you were coming undone.
“Mmm” Dan moaned, loving the taste of you as he cleaned up your release with his broad tongue.
He left one last kiss on your clit before standing up and undoing his restricting jeans…
You could have never anticipated the love making that was followed. There was not way you were walking for the next few days.
You both spent the night on the sofa, cuddled up as Dan continued to love the feeling of your finally loved, decorative marks, dawning your soft thighs.

anonymous asked:

hey you, you're very cute. yes you, you are so freaking adorable and ilysm. you beautiful thing, go ahead and dream and go achieve what you want. i believe in you <3 (did i make u blush?)

This did not make me blush but my heart just swelled 10x its size. Anon ur the sweetest. Gosh I’m going to giant I melted when I read this.

I dare you to make me blush. 🌹

my biggest fear in life is that by the time I finally get the money to go to playlist live or vidcon, dan and phil will have stopped doing youtube

"Love, let me teach you"

Most would find it boring, yet it was honestly one of your favourite ways to pass the time.
You loved watching your best friend play video games, his concentration unbreakable as his fingers moved the analog sticks quickly, bashing buttons at the same time.

You had always envied his skill, wishing you could be anywhere close to as skilled as he was. Which is why you had spent months saving and finally bought a gaming console yourself.
You spent all of your free time alone, practising and always ending up buried in deep frustration.

Dan was worried about the fact that you were spending less time with him. He thought he might have upset you somehow or that he was losing his closest friend.

He really started to panic when you stopped replying to his texts, and so he got his wallet and phone, and he was at your front door within that very hour.

He knocked a few times but was never answered. The door was unlocked so he knew someone was home and without a second thought he walked straight in.

He checked your room first, then the kitchen.

“No no no” your voice sounded from the living room. Dan jogged quickly to the room, needing to make sure you were okay. But the moment he saw you he couldn’t hold back his smirk.

You were so deep in focus, leaning forward on the seat, yet you were still doing so bad.
Dan had to hold back a giggle as he watched from the door frame. However when you growled in frustration Dan lost control and the laughter escaped.

You jumped at his voice, having no idea he was there.

“Oh my god! You scared me Dan!” You exclaimed with a hand on your chest.

Dan laughed as he walked over and sat beside you on the sofa. You became shocked as he pulled you onto his lap and wrapped his arms around you.

“Dan… What are you doing?”

“Love, let me teach you” he purred into your ear. The rumbling of his chest as he spoke made goosebumps rise all over your body.

Arms around you and controller in hand, Dan restarted the level. You watched his large hands move around, wondering what else he could do with them.. Wait… What?

Butterflies went crazy in your belly as it finally hit you, how close you were to Dan.. Well, you were literally sat on top of him… With his arms around you.

“Is this what you’ve been doing lately?” Dan questions without looking away from the screen.

“Yeah” you breath out the word as you crane your neck to look up at him.

“Why?” He asks while you look up and admire his features.

“Because I wanted to be able to play games too… But now I’m realising I’m much happier watching you”

“Yeah?” Dan replies as he looks away from the screen and into your eyes, his face just inches from yours.

“Yeah” you reply

“Well I’d rather do this than play video games” Dan says before slowly leaning in and connecting his lips the your own.

Part 2:

Part 1: x

Hey guys, It’s Sarah! I hope you like Part 2 of this little blurb! Please don’t forget to request personally because I am always looking for ideas on what to write. Thank you so much and let’s get right to it shall we?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I am going to get a drink b-r-b” I rushed out of the room so quickly I didn’t even give Dan the chance to answer.

For my best of luck the kitchen was empty but not for long, someone seemed to have followed me.

“Hey hey hey look who is here”  Samantha said in an arrogant way. As she walked, her high heels clicked on the kitchen floor. She was holding a full glass of red whine. Is she drunk? Does that mean she is going to be nicer or ten times worse? My question was about to get answered.

“Why are you here in the kitchen you little slut? Wait.. let me guess” she tapped her forehead like she was thinking.

“You are Dan and I’s new little maid! That’s it! You probably need some money since your dress looks like it comes from the thrift store.”

Tears started falling down my cheeks. If only my mouth said what I was thinking, if only I could react and do something about it.

“ Ohh… don’t start crying slutty maid I have a job for you” She said as she grabbed my cheek, I pulled away. She tilted her glass of whine making it all dramatically fall to the floor.

“Pick it up!” She demanded as the threw a paper towel at me, I refused. “ You don’t want me to tell Dan you have been bad to me.. it’s a privilege you even get to see him” she bragged like he was a toy on her display.

I couldn’t lose Dan, I wouldn’t bare myself so I knelt down and started to clean the mess up.

“Hahaha oh my god that’s what you deserve you bitch! Trying to get my boyfriend it’s so ridiculous”

I let a little whimper come out of my mouth as I continued to scrub the floor.

She leaned down next to me “Why are you so sad? You will never get to fuck Dan Howell?” “Hahah to bad” she started to laugh uncontrollably until a big shadow towered in front of us.

Someone pulled my arm and put me behind its back. It all happened so quickly , but as soon as I gained my senses of what was going on I realized It was Dan himself.

“Samantha get out.” He said in a serious tone, his eyes were flaming with anger.

“But Babe-”

“Get Out!” He yelled. Samantha started crying as she left the room.

Dan turned to face me. There was a long silence until he wrapped his arms around me and gave me a long embrace.

“Y/N Don’t let anyone hurt you like that. You should have told me…” he said softly taking in what happened.

“Why would you care?” I bluntly responded.

Dan seemed surprised by the question and took time to answer it.

“ Because I realized that I love you Y/N, more than a friend. You always lighten up the mood when you enter the room, your smile gives happiness to everyone that’s around you and your eyes… give me life. I knew you were to good for me and that you probably didn’t feel the same way so I tried to forget you by getting a girlfriend”

“Samantha….” I murmured.

“Yes, but it didn’t feel the same. It felt a piece within me was missing and that was you, Y/N” He let me go and looked at me expecting a response.

“Dan, I love you too and I always did..” I can’t believe I said that. I felt my cheeks heating up, I was blushing very hard. I looked down at the floor but dan lifted my  chin up with a careful touch.

He leaned in until his sweet chapped lips touched mine. I felt sparks fly everywhere inside me, This was meant to be.
When we pulled away Dan reached out and hugged me again.

“I wanted to do that for so long” he said sincerely.

“Yes!!! I knew it! I ship you guys so much!! Marcus!! Come here you need to give me those $60 you promised!!! I won the bet!!!” Louise yelled as she started skipping happily through the hallway.

Multiple Make-Ups

Summary: Dan often has to make up for his actions concerning Phil. Pure shameless Phan fluff, sweet enough to rot your teeth

The Cactus Drawing Incident

Dan and Phil had only just gotten home after doing their latest radio show. Dan was a little confused at his boyfriend’s behavior towards the end of the show, especially over the whole ‘cactus thing’. If people began to put two and two together then it could be bad.

“Phil, you do realize you asked Mollie that cactus question live for the world to hear, right?”

“Well I needed advice,” Phil replied with a pout, shuffling over to the couch.

Keep reading

Dance Around Like Constellations

genre: angst and fluff
word count: 6.6k (gasp!!!!! a fic longer than 1k!!!!)
warnings: a panic attack, alcohol usage
beta’d by: @ghostboylester and @dantiloquent (i love u both wt f)

@virulester​ omg elliE i hope u like it (sorry i butchered it lmao)
x-posted on ao3

“Phil, you’re drunk.”

It’s a plea, almost, a prayer for Phil to stop talking so he doesn’t say something that isn’t true, something that he’ll regret later. Instead, he can hear Phil’s chuckle down the line, an amused one like Phil isn’t in danger of ruining everything they have, everything Dan has.

“As I’ll ever be!” He sounds happy, content, and Dan feels jealous that Phil can feel like that with other people. He knows it’s stupid, of course it’s stupid, because Phil doesn’t belong to him and he has other friends. He’d just like it if he was special to Phil, somehow.

“Hey Dan?” Phil slurs, a careful undertone to his voice. “You know I love you right?”

Keep reading


A/N: This one goes out to all my peeps in long distance relationships, hang in there homies /ahem/ im joking, but this one is about a long distance relationship and although i haven’t been in one personally, one of my best friends has

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 1057 words

“My hands are shaking, this is your complicated love with me. Keep your eyes closed, I’ve seen it baby, I’ve seen where this goes. Stay tonight, don’t come morning, don’t come light. They may be lies but say that we’ll be alright, if we stay tonight.“

Your P.O.V

Long distance wasn’t exactly my forte, but the prize is worth the wait. That is, until my victory is over and the person I love had to go back home. Its not easy saying goodbye to the person that you love, standing in an airport, with tears rushing down both of your guys faces as you promise and vow to see each other soon, although soon never comes around quickly. Soon becomes later and then before you know it, it’s been 7 months and the only communication that you’ve had is through a shitty Skype screen that always seems to crash every hour. That right there is not my forte, but for some reason nothing stopped me when I met a guy on the streets of my hometown and before I knew it, we were doing the whole long distance thing.

But on a Saturday night, as I spend time with Dan and my family, holding hands with him, nobody actually knows how I feel right now, and how I feel is like shit, because Dan has to go home tomorrow, back to England and back to reality, and how will it shape my life afterwards? I don’t know because the outcome is different every time. So standing in an empty room, filled with people who don’t really care about my life, holding Dan’s hand, is like drowning in a lake where you’re trying to scream for help, but no one can hear you. I guess it just feels like this because after tomorrow, they’ll be nothing left. He’ll be gone and I’ll be broken.

I guess life just has to work out that way sometimes. I mean, people say that god only gives you what you can handle and conquer. So i guess, I may not be able to handle this now, but maybe someday down the road I will.

But i don’t want the sun to rise tomorrow because that means I’m destined for another goodbye. I don’t want another goodbye. It only means our time together is over, and I’m not in the mood for that.

A tugging on my hand pulls me out of my thoughts, when I look up to see Dan looking down at me endearingly. “Come on love, let’s go to bed, we have an early start.” I nod my head yes, although I feel like my insides are twisting around and my heart is thumping in my chest at the thought of the early morning tomorrow and what’s going to follow.

I tell my mother that Dan and I are going to bed, and I think she can tell how I’m feeling at this moment, because she pulls me into a big hug and rubs my back, like she used to do when I was little, it’s a comfort mechanism.

“Okay then. Goodnight.” She says comfortingly then lets me go. I go up stairs with Dan and as I make my way up stairs, all the distant laughs of everyone in the living room become a blur in the background because in my mind, I’m thinking that this is going to be my last night with Dan for a while.

As Dan gets dressed and gets into bed, I sit on the end of the bed contemplating my life, and what I’m gonna do after Dan leaves. I don’t want him to leave. I think Dan can sense my distress because after he asks me to come to bed, and I don’t say anything, he’s up and sitting next to me.

“(Y/n), what’s wrong?” He asks, rubbing my back in a soothing way. My hands start to shake as my mind is still in over drive, thinking about everything.

“I don’t want you to go tomorrow.” I whisper to him. He puts his arms around me and pulls me into a tight embrace that I want to stay in forever. It feels like home. He’s my home. “Are we going to be alright after this? Say that we’re gonna be alright.” More tears start building up in my eyes but I refuse to let them fall. I don’t want him to see me like this. They may be lies, but I just want to hear him say that we’re gonna be alright.

He signals to the bed, saying that we should get into bed and then tall more about it. Once we’re tucked in, he finally says something. “We are going to be alright. We’re gonna get through this, because I love you, and I would hope to god that you love me as much as I love you.” Dan says, holding me close. He lets out a big yawn and then he falls asleep, but not without saying goodnight.

“Goodnight, Dan.” I reply but he’s already asleep. I just want him to keep his eyes closed just so he doesn’t have to go home. I’ve seen this all before and I’ve seen where it goes. This is his complicated love with me. And I know he loves me, but sometimes love isn’t enough to keep two people together. Sometimes a love like this hurts more than saying goodbye.

I know I’m not going to get any sleep tonight, my mind is in over drive and there’s nothing that I can do to stop it. I just wish we could always be together instead of miles away. Tears start streaming down my face as time keeps on passing and the realisation kick in even more, that the fact that tomorrow will come and he’ll be gone.

I just want him to stay.

This long distance thing right here, is definitely not my forte, but I guess when you’re deeply in love with someone, you’ll do anything to make them happy.


Title: jinx

Rating: NC-16

Warnings: crude language, wet dreams, rule 63 (cisswap)

Genre: romance, slice of life, rule 63 (cisswap)

Pairing: cisswap!phan

Characters: afab cisgirl!d & afab agender!p

Summary: 2009. An organised chaos, and Phil was the center of it all. And she didn’t find it in herself to mind.

A/N: all phanfic authors have to go through this one way or another (hehe) this is my take on phan’s 2009 timeline. Inspired heavily by the song “Jinx” by DNCE.

Credits: smut scene written by @lesteresce​ my hoe-norary best friend (snort). Chat scene contributed by Meifang.

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You looked cute though

Cute, short, fluffy oneshot with Dan and Phil
(Concept from @phanconcept)


Dan was slouched in his usual browsing positions on their couch, editing the latest Undertale gaming video with Phil’s head resting on his lap as he furiously tapped his phone, trying to keep himself alive on Crossy Road. They usually sat like that either on their couch or on their bed and the comfortable silence, (with the exception of Phil groaning when he died) was perfectly normal with them, their presence was enough to keep each other happy.

Dan didn’t know if it was the beam of light that shone from the window onto Phil’s light complexion or whether it was the way his face scrunched up and his tongue stuck out slightly when he concentrated but Phil looked adorable. Dan couldn’t handle himself and quickly leaned down to press a kiss to Phil’s lips.

The kiss caught Phil by surprised and let out a shriek when he inevitably died and the words ‘Game Over’ appeared on his phone screen. Dan pulled away and laughed quietly as Phil quickly shot up and glared at his boyfriend.

“I was about to beat my high score. Did you have to kiss me when I was on a busy motorway?” He pouted and Dan continued laughing at him.

“You looked cute though.” Dan smiled as Phil blushed slightly.

He threw his phone onto the opposite side of the couch to where his feet were a few seconds ago and brought his knees up to his chin. Dan’s arms wrapped themselves around Phil’s torso as he smiled slightly, letting Dan place a kiss to his cheek.

“I’m sorry Philly.” Dan laughed into Phil’s ear.

“I hate you.” He replied.

“I’m going to prove that I love you and that I’m sorry.”

“And how will you do that?”

Dan grinned as he pinned Phil to the couch and showered him in kisses. His lips touched every part of his face and his neck and his ears until Phil was laughing and squirming under Dan’s touch.

“Why are you so endearing, it makes it so hard to hate you.” Phil complained as he finally wriggled out of Dan’s grasp as sat next to him.

“I don’t know lion, I’m just naturally talented. And I know for a fact that you love me a lot so you would always forgive me.” Dan smirked as he shut his laptop and let the video carry on saving.

“You do love me don’t you?” Dan asked as he wrapped his arms around the back of the older mans neck.

“Hmm, I guess so.” He replied as Dan giggled quietly.

Both boys leaned forwards as they’re lips met in a gentle kiss. They melted into each other’s touch as Phil’s arms snaked around Dan’s waist. Phil ran his tongue along Dan’s bottom lip as he opened it slightly, letting Phil’s tongue slide in and meet his. Their tongues danced together as their staggered breaths filled the silent room and echoed round slightly.

They pulled away and let their foreheads rest on each other’s.

“I do love you don’t worry.” Phil whispered.

“Good. Can we cuddle?”

“C'mere you.”

Phil laid on the couch with his head propped up on some pillows as Dan laid himself on top of the older man, nuzzling his head into Phil’s chest. Dan inhaled and Phil’s normal odour of vanilla and raspberry filled his nose.

“You smell really nice.” Dan mumbled into Phil’s chest.

“That was very out of the blue but thanks.”

They sat together for a while longer, enjoying being together and having the comfort of each other’s presence and embrace until both Dan and Phil eventually fell into slumber at only 9pm.

Just the Beginning

word count: 1k

genre: fluff

warnings: nothing 

summary: After months of putting it off, Dan and Phil finally decide to adopt a dog.

A/N: Imaging Dan and Phil with a dog (or any pet really) is one of my favourite things in the entire world so I decided to write this. I really love this headcanon so please let me know if you like it because I’d love to write more!

Keep reading

Worst Timing Ever.

Dan was setting up for his weekly live show in his old bedroom. It was only used when Dan made videos as he now shared a bed with his boyfriend, Phil. Of course nobody had to know that. Sure the Phandom had many ideas and ‘proof’ of them. But they weren’t going to announce it until they themselves were ready. They’ve been dating for three years and Dan wouldn’t say it aloud but they’ve been the best years of his life.

Phil had been the one to ask. Their first date was a little iffy at first but they soon relaxed. Phil had taken him out for a movie. Dan didn’t see the difference between going as friends and as a date. But Phil had surprised him by intertwining their fingers on the armrest. Dan liked it more than he thought he would. It wasn’t until months later that Dan moved his clothes and some possessions into Phil’s room. They just had to remember to hide certain things before filming a video.

Dan was just about to start when he remember to mess up the bed sheets. It, one, looked like he slept in it. But it also made some of the fans yell at him for it. It was a game now. He made sure his door was opened in case Phil were to join later that evening. Dan settled into the famous butt chair. Making sure his computer was all ready to go, Dan started the live show.

“Hello!” He smiled and watched the few first people start to join the chat. “Describe how you’re feeling in one word. Go!”

The live show was going very well. He always loved doing them and looked forward to them every week. He’d told them about how Phil was planning a new baking video for Halloween and that they just finished a new DanAndPhilGames scary video. People sent him love and there were a couple proposals. But majority of the chat was filled with phan-like comments.

“What are you dressing up as for Halloween? Says Caroline.” Dan tapped his chin. He truly had no idea what they were going to do. “Maybe Shrek. That’d be interesting. I think Phil said he wanted to go as Thor.” He looked into the camera. “He keeps swearing he’s Thor. I don’t believe him.” He rocked back on his chair looking through the chat for anything that popped out.

“It looks like Phil is watching.” Dan laughed as he saw Phil’s name in the chat saying, more like yelling as it was in capslock, that he was Thor and he just didn’t want to show his muscles. He turned to yell over his shoulder. “You know you could just come in!” Silence was his response. It was strange since Phil’s never silent. Especially with their fans present. “Quit being a dork and come in here.” He laughed as no movement could be heard. “So Phil is being an idiot.” He told everyone.

The chat started saying Phil was being adorable and people were saying hi to the new guest. Dan decided to ignore the people saying things about those muscles being only for him.

Dan decided it was time to answer some questions sent as fan mail. One of them asked what movies he’s seen recently. He told them about how the two of them have been watching scary movies over the past week. Someone else asked when another Danisnotonfire video will be.

“Soon guys! I Promise!” It was the phrase he used every week.

He looked down to see he got another marriage proposal from someone. Just as he was about to thank them, he noticed the name.

Phil Lester sent you a marriage proposal.

At first he thought it was a joke. But it couldn’t have been. Phil was funny but he wouldn’t do that as a joke. Especially in front of thousands of fans.

“Um. Just hang on a minute guys.” The chat was already going crazy. Dan stood up and moved quickly to his door, shutting it behind him as he went searching for his boyfriend. He wasn’t in their bedroom or the kitchen doing some secret snacking, leaving only the lounge.

The door was closed but light peeked out through the edges. He opened the door, letting the squeaky hinge announce his arrival. What was on the other side was overwhelming to say the least.

Phil was down on one knee, holding a ring in both of his hands.

Dan started to shake with excitement but he was also a little nervous.

“Dan, I love you. You’ve been such an interesting twist in my life. But a good one. I’ve been so lucky to have met you. You’ve kept me stable and you keep me on my toes. Life is never boring. From the first message years back, I knew you were special to me. That I’d do anything to make sure I wouldn’t lose you. Dan, you are the light in my dark world. You are the stars in my night sky. I know this is cheesy but I mean every word. I love you, Dan Howell. Please let me be the happiest man alive and be my husband.”

Dan was absolutely speechless. He fell to his knees in front of Phil and smiled with watery eyes. He let the tears fall and pull his boyfriend into a heart-warming embrace.

“Yes. Yes, I will.” He whispered. Dan leaned into Phil’s neck and the smell of hot chocolate and his body wash of cinnamon was what made him feel safe and loved. He felt Phil place a kiss on his temple. But see that wasn’t good enough. Dan gave him a proper kiss and didn’t want to leave that spot.

He looked over Phil’s shoulder at his boyfriend’s laptop. He’d completely forgotten about his live show!

“I guess I should explain why I disappeared on them.” Dan pouted and hugged Phil closer.

Phil laughed in Dan’s ear and rested his hands on his now fiance’s hips. “Probably. Or you could just tell them you have to go and come right back here.”

“I wouldn’t have to if someone chose a better time than in the middle of a live show!” Dan smirked as Phil blushed. “I’ll be right back.”

Dan quickly went back to his room and explained he had to get going. Everyone was still yelling 'Phan is real!!’ or 'Can I come to your wedding?!!?’. He only laughed and gave his farewells. Promising he’ll be back next week.

Going to join his fiance in the lounge for maybe a night of cuddling, Dan discovered Phil had other plans. A tangle of sweaty limbs were covered by the green and blue blanket awhile later.

“I love you, Philly.”

“I love you too.”

in case nobody has told you today

you are a wonderfully unique person, the world will never ever again have someone as beautiful (inside and out) as you, you have a fascinating mind and a dazzling personality

that thing you’re worrying about? it will all be okay in the end. I know it seems the end of the world now, maybe like you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, but it’ll all be okay in the end, I promise you. Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not next week, maybe not for years, but I promise one day you’ll look back on it and laugh.

I love you so much, and you’re more loved than you think by those people around you. You’re not invisible to people, greet everyone with a smile and the universe will smile with you, you can make somebody’s day. 

Considering I am a Dan and Phil blog, let me add on here, that Dan and Phil love you too. You may not think it, but they do, they wouldn’t be living the life they do without you and your support, you make them smile as much as they make you smile, and they are as eternally grateful to you as the universe is to you for existing.

Keep going, you’re doing great. I promise.