let alone people in the internet

Already seeing people shitting on the Batman movie getting a rewrite.

They got a new director and it just shows that Matt Reeves is getting hands on with this film and is getting super involved. This will make for a better film.

I hate how when one little thing comes out from DC, people say dumb shit like “How hard can this be? Why is it taking them so long? This project is doomed.”

Like shut the fuck up.

Filmmaking is hard. Okay? Especially big budget filmmaking. There is so much stuff that goes into filmmaking that you wouldn’t be able to learn everything about it in 4 years of film school.

I’m serious. There is so much stuff that goes into it that the only way to really learn it is to actually be on set.

Majority of the Internet has never been on a film set let alone seen one.

WB has been making films for a damn century nearly. Chill. Let them take their time and don’t act like the world will end with every bit of news that comes out.

An Open Letter on Why I’m Leaving the Internet (For a While)

Hi there,

If you’re reading this, we share a connection. Even if we don’t know each other day to day, I care about you a lot. That’s why I wanted to let you know that, for my own mental well-being, I need to leave the Internet for a little while.

Like a lot of people, I spent the last year obsessed with our presidential campaigns; like a lot of people, I woke up this morning scared. I need to spend some time getting un-scared. I need to find, within and around me, places of love.

All that time I spent obsessed with the campaigns (and to what effect, I now must ask myself)—that was time I didn’t spend creating things that make others feel less alone. It was time I didn’t take my dog to the park on a moment’s whim. Time I didn’t spend playing boardgames with my wife, or volunteering, or doing the thousand little things I know will make me a kinder, more-fulfilled me.

Whatever candidate you supported, it’s clear after this hateful election that we can’t rely on our leaders to fill our culture with kindness, with thoughtfulness, with hope. It’s our job to do that. It’s our duty.

This isn’t a retreat. I just won’t stomach the hatred and misinformation anymore. And if you won’t either, that does not make you weak.

May love bless and keep us.

Your friend,

“With that recent tire fire that was that Reddit post, you sure have some thick skin, Ben Brode mentioned that being sorta the face of a game opens you up to brunt of the community’s attacks when people asked why him and Yong Woo didn’t do more designer insights. Do you feel it’s important for a dev to have thick skin when dealing with this stuff.”

I don’t think you can be a good game designer if you have thin skin. You have to subject your ideas to the crucible of review, whether that happens internally or after players see your design.

I do think you can be a good game designer if you have thick skin, but don’t have thick enough skin to open yourself up to direct communication with players. Some of my favorite games have been made by people that can barely stand to have a conversation with other humans, let alone open themselves up to the internet.

But if you’re going to go that route, you just have to be really, really good at what you do. You need a purity of vision or an ability to foresee problems that just isn’t that common in developers. I don’t have that. Way back at Ensemble, when we weren’t sure if design A or design B made more sense, I said “Let’s just ask players what they think.” 

You don’t have to ask up front. You can launch a feature, monitor the response, and then iterate on that feature. But you have to get that feedback at some point. Lead Champion Designer Riot Scruffy the other day said something like “Even when you’ve really thought about it, tested and iterated, your chance of nailing a great design is about 70%. So you have to be prepared to iterate based on player feedback. You have to leave time for the follow-up work.” 

(I also don’t mean to imply that asking players on Reddit or forums is the only way we gather feedback.)

Now, I don’t subscribe to the idea that players should just be able to say whatever the hell they want to, and developers should just suck it up because that’s their job. I value communication, and communication is easier if you treat each other like human beings. But I also recognize that players get emotional or frustrated, and I recognize that the power dynamic between passionate player and developer who just doesn’t get it can exacerbate that frustration.

But there are limits.

I don’t block a lot of players on Twitter, but I do block them. I don’t answer stupidly rude questions, except to make a point of the fact that they aren’t going to actually bring me to tears. Sorry.

I’ve had weird phone calls in the middle of the night. I’ve had death threats. I’ve had Blizzard security offer to monitor my house. I’ve had designers who had to work with the FBI on threats. I’m also an upper class, straight, white dude, and I know developers who aren’t who have gotten much, much worse from players. There’s no reason for that. We all love games. That already gives us a lot in common.

I try and remind players all the time that your communication is going to be more effective if you’re professional about it, because then you’re actually talking about the problem and not venting about how neglected you feel. If you have a job or go to school, you probably have coworkers or teachers you disagree with that you still have to treat like human beings. Developers deserve the same respect. I know it might score you internet points to attack someone in an over the top matter. You’re better than that. Resist the urge.


I fucking hate these bullshit giveaways people do on tumblr.

This one giveaway I just saw seems really bogus. You’ve probably seen it. These are the prizes:

  1. a kanken ‘mini’ backpack in any color you want
  2. a brand new lilly pulitzer agenda (not 2014-2015..that was the only pic)
  3. a new set of muji gel pens
  4. a kate spade holiday card set
  5. a stabilo point 88 set (25 color)
  6. iPad mini 3 in any color you want

A fucking iPad Mini 3? Those are at least $400.

Students aren’t rich. Their parents can be. It seems higihly suspicious that any parent would want to buy an iPad Mini 3, let alone all that other shit, for some kid that isn’t their own. Some random person on the internet.


I did one once. It was a modest giveaway where I didn’t even require people to be following me (I said “it would be nice since this is supposed to be a thanks to my followers”). Like, I was sent an extra set of Mildliners by Amazon by accident so I gave away that with some other school supplies I didn’t use. I sent the package with a nice note. And never heard from the person who won after they gave me their address. Not even a thank you. Which was pretty rude. I paid to ship that package with my own money.

This shit just makes me so mad. It’s ridiculous.


I feel so heartbroken right now. I have lived in America all my life and have always been proud of it; never have I been disgusted and ashamed of my country. Words cannot describe the void and fear I feel now. As a bisexual Latinx women, I am not only ashamed and terrified for myself, but for the millions of other people living in this country. How could we let ourselves come to this? Obama worked so hard for us to be where we are now and soon that will all be taken away. A girl legitimately told me she voted for harambe. Any election, let alone a presidential one, isn’t a fucking joke. People DIED for voting rights, and you’re seriously going to waste on a fucking internet meme? Grow up America.

dear anonymous,

hey you! yeah you!

i see you! you might think that since you’re hiding behind those big ol’ sunglasses that no one can see you. you also think that everyone on the internet is nanoexistant, or that they dont exist at all. you probably believe that everyone is perfectly fine.

well greyface, let me give you another story.

im shaking with rage as i write this.

im suicidal.

im insane.

and if you push me far enough,

i will end up institutionalized, 

cause h*** no, im not going to be the one to pull the trigger.

but one of my friends pulled it.

he’s gone now, and its because of you.

so **** off and leave people alone you greyfaced jerks.

there are a lot of nice anons out there.

if you’re not one, become one.

dont drive people over the edge.

you’ll probably regret it.

dont shame “tumblr famous” people like @hntrgurl13 or @learningftw or @ anyone with over 100 followers

dont harass or bully or pick up fights with great people or people that you dont share opinions with, like @autisticninjacole or @ any one you dont like/share opinions

theres a blacklist button for a reason

a lot of these people on this site are my friends, like @mr-universe99 , @themindofcc , and @keleficent

if you have nothing nice to say, dont say nothing at all


there are so many possible reasons why season 20 of south park was a fucking mess… let’s list a few

1. made their B (A?) story all about the election so when trump won oopsy doopsy

2. TRASH storyline for the kids (gender war) that literally went nowhere. like it straight up just stopped!! you can’t do that!! 

3. matt stone and trey parker present: animated mid-life crisis. these two are seriously at odds with the people they were and the very real seed of online hate speech they planted in the days of early personal internet use and the people they are now when they’re parents and husbands and the chickens have come home to roost

4. the episodes do not stand alone at all?? it was just set piece after set piece. even last season can be watched out of order. like

5. of the four protagonists only two were “focused” on. that’s in quotes because it’s a mystery to me what kyle and cartman’s goals were post-episode 2. one of the protags has yet to even speak in an episode and the season ends tonight. the other one just kind of sits there and sighs.

yo stop replying to bambams tweets w sarcastic “internet” slang like “sTop” or “delete” or “fuck u” bc this boy has replied to so many of those tweets telling people sorry or to stop bc hes (very understandably) seeing them as legitimate hate messages leave the poor kid alone let him be happy omg

Stages Of Fangirling

1. Yeah. I can see that. They are pretty awesome together. Great chemistry.
People are totally gonna ship it.

2. Hm. Let’s go on tumblr and check out what everyone else is thinking about them. (Biggest mistake ever)

3.Yep. Told ya. Everyone’s obsessing over them lol

4. It has happened, guys. I ship it. the ship has sailed


6. make it canon make it canon make it canon pleeeeease :“”“(

7. Whatever. They love each other. One’s got a girlfriend? Nah. They will get through this.

episodes: The Phantom Menace

The release of hardly any other movie was met with the same kind of anticipation and hype than the first chapter in the Star Wars Saga after sixteen years of absence: Episode I - The Phantom Menace. Much has been said about that movie. In a lot of cases, I’d definitely say too much. While the initial response was at least not negative, as proven by the well-known Gallup survey conducted immediately after release, it soon became an internet sport to bash and trash the film to no end. That has become some kind of internet rite, much like shaking hands in the real world: people do it without really thinking about it, let alone questioning it or thinking about alternatives. It’s become a given, the same old complaints being repeated and repeated without a single deeper thought.

What’s the real drama about this is that it’s completely unwarranted. One thing most people at least agree with is the fact that the Prequel’s story, including Episode I’s, is quite a bit more complex than the story of the original films. While many claims say it turned out unsuccessfully complex, I can’t agree. For its insane focus on so-called „wooden dialogue“, it’s perplexingly sad how the achievements of Episode I’s screenplay are publicly missed, forgotten or lightly dismissed. It’s as overlooked as it is to be appreciated how George Lucas managed to write a script that introduced a lot of overarching themes and developments while still telling a very basic and immediate story of people fighting for freedom. After all, there are five corresponding story lines depicted in The Phantom Menace:

  • the underlying story about Palpatine’s beginning his rise to power
  • the episode-specific story about a Queen trying to free her people
  • the intervowen story about two Jedi being sent to help by the Republic, allowing us to see the functionality of both the Jedi Council and the Republic
  • the interwoven story about a young boy being found on a desert planet, saying the day in the end
  • the overall story of the Sith returning and what that means for the Jedi

It’s hardly appreciated how these storylines become one story and how they were worked out to flow into each other, giving room to multiple interesting characters and themes. Those characters are certainly treated in an unconventional way, which feels stange at first, but allows all of them to play a crucial role at some point in the film. You kind of wonder why this or that character is there until at some point of the film it becomes obvious.

The films main story is certainly driven by the character of Qui-Gon Jinn, who leads us through the events and gives audiences an anchor for orientation. Despite some contrary claims, this did not go on the expense of Obi-Wan Kenobi. Obi-Wan, after all, was allowed to grow in the wind shadow of his master. It’s the spectacular end fight between Kenobi, Jinn and Darth Maul that didn’t just provide us with a phenomenal choreography and music but also with a face-off between Jedi and Sith philosophies. Obi-Wan is neither as aggressive as Maul nor as calm and Qui-Gon Jinn and when his master is killed, he almost fails by giving in to his anger and thoughts of revenge. Ultimately though, he remembered his master’s teaching which allows him to defeat and kill Darth Maul with Jinn’s weapon and become a Jedi Knight.

While Qui-Gon is obviously the main driving force of the story, the story itself revolves around a young Queen who is challenged with the struggle of being peaceful and passive or going into a fight to help themselves. In her journey to find the right answer, she meets Anakin Skywalker.  Looking at The Phantom Menace with the knowledge of the following two movies, it’s remarkable how fluent the groundwork for Anakin’s character played out. Anakin’s birth into slavery and the following strong need to be free of orders, independent of authority were obvious in both Episode II and III for one. The boy’s relationship with both his mother, Shmi (finally introducing the mother-side-of-things), and his surrogate father, Qui-Gon Jinn, is the other side and the emotional heart of the movie. The sense of family that they convey gives a maturity to the series that has been absent before. As part of that, we get to see how Anakin is deeply skilled and gifted while at the same time being confronted with the roots of his fall. Contrary to other Jedi, Anakin has been grown up with his mother and he has become attached to her. Leaving her was a big challenge and the ultimate fate of Shmi (her death with him being unable to stop it) would greatly affect Anakin’s action when again confronted with the need to let go (of Padmé) to a great extent.

Ironically, despite the consistency in characterization and how it made definitely sense to see the roots of Anakin’s characters and his popularity after release in 1999 (see Gallup), little Anakin has become almost as hated on the internet as Jar Jar Binks. Jar Jar Binks has also been well-received by the audiences in 1999 according the Gallup but has soon become the scapegoat for Prequel bashers: A character or person you can insult / disparage / hate / despise without having to justify yourself. That’s sad, not least because Jar Jar is a characters that’s supposed to teach us to respect every being because every being has its worth – even if it’s sometimes annoying to reach that potential and worth. Jar Jar unconsciously made the first step to bond the Naboo and the Gungans and those who believed in him, particularly Queen Amidala and Qui-Gon Jinn, were rewarded for their faith and humanity. So after being somehow irritating for more than half of the film, Jar Jar becomes important and that’s characteristic for the movie. You get to see its full potential and the value that it brings to the Star Wars legend once you allow yourself to let the movie unfold in its own way.

All of these characters do have their function in various parts of the story, filling the film’s epic imagery with humanity and relevance. The Phantom Menace provides us with an astonishing range of visual expression, showcasing Lucas’s talents and sensibilities. The many wide shots showing characters in the context of their environment and the situation the go through just as much call for attention as precise and haunting close-ups of characters like Amidala. In the middle of all this, there are numerous shot that mirror each other or can be seen as inversions of each other or variations of ideas and occurences. 

All old, we end up with a movie that’s thoroughly entertaining – filled with spectacular action and warm moments of mother and son – while still saying good things. The movie gives us an idea of how a evil man corrupts a political system and thereby harms society. It gives us an impression of the challenges that leaders are confronted with, being faced with the task to question their whole world-view. It makes it obvious how we all depend on each other (Naboo/Gungans, Jar Jar and the others, midichlorians and the people they live “inside”). It tells a story that highlights the value of all beings, from the skilled Jedi to the strong-willed Queen and a gifted young boy to a clumsy but good-hearted stranger. They all play their own specific part to make a better world.

The Phantom Menace is a worthy and enriching addition to the Star Wars Saga and will hopefully finally gain more respect once people get tired of assemly-line-produced Star Wars in five or ten years from now…

A thing that I'd like...

Hi friends, I just wanted to quickly say that I know that a lot of you are struggling, and I would really like to help you all, but there’s only so much that I can do on my own. I’m just one person. So I just want to ask you guys to support each other. Anytime you see anyone that’s having a hard time, love them, and let them know that they’re not alone. People on the internet are more than just code– there is a living breathing person behind the keyboard– remind them of that. We all need to support eachother.

If you are having a difficult time and you don’t know where to turn, there are trained professionals that went to school to help people like you– these people are fucking rad! They worked their asses off for years so that they could help someone that’s having trouble like yourself– take them up on that offer.

@queer-empanada is an example of someone that is having a lot of trouble right now, and I can’t help them alone. If you have the time can you please go let them know that we care about them. They need some love and encouragement right now.

Thanks guys. You’re the best ❤

Hi everyone! This is the current situation happening at my school, United Highschool in Laredo Texas.
Nicole a survivor of leukemia as well as a ninth grade student, is being bullied by other students in her grade.
Some of our fellow classmates are trying make this go viral and make a support team to let her know she’s not alone. Everything she’s been through, she shouldn’t of all people be attacked like this.
Spread the word, and use the hashtag #Teamnicole on any social media website and app! Thank you guys💛🐮
(bullies or not, We are all people 💛 make the Internet a safer place)


                She’s lucky her power isn’t obvious. As she walks down the street, she’s painfully aware of all the other gifted people that walk around with their identities posted all over the internet, their names and faces on every late night newscast. She wants to use her powers for good, but she knows that means signing the Sokovia Accords, letting them dictate what she can and can’t do with her powers. That alone terrifies her.
                “Hey,” she says, giving the other a slight nod. “How’re you?”


MY PTXperience

I’m gonna start off by saying this: I don’t live in Florida. I live in Maryland. I saved up to buy PP tickets but since they were all sold out (curse you patrons) I used tho difference between the cost for PP and the cost for SC to buy plane tickets.

My PTX day started at 3 pm when I arrived at the BB&T center. The doors didn’t open until 4. It was then that I met one of my Twitter friends Rebecca. She was the first internet friend I ever met. We hung out it line and chanted for a while. Then we went inside. They let the SC and PP people in first so I was heading in alone (Rebecca only had M&G).

I walked inside and got my GA bracelet and was led upstairs. Up there, I was briefly standing alone…until a whole bunch of people started coming up to me saying “You’re Ollie, right? I’ve watched your covers on Twitter!”
It was WEIRD.

Anyways, I made friends with a group of people. I don’t want to bore you with these details cuz this isn’t what y'all want to read about.
Once the guide explained the M&G process to us, he led us down to the arena. We stood in a hallway where a black curtain was drawn over the entrance. My newfound friends and I were the first ones in line. The guide told us that he would tell us when we could go in. And so we stood there chatting until all of a sudden we heard singing coming from behind the curtain. Soundcheck had begun. Avi then proceeded to hit an extremely low note. All of us screamed and we heard Scott say “well I guess the soundcheck group is here.”
We stood there for a LONG time listening to them running stuff on repeat. FINALLY it was time for us to walk in. I was the first one down the stairs.

They all walked down to the front of the stage and sat down. They all greeted us.
Please understand that this was my first time EVER seeing them in person. I was stunned as to how such a beautiful group of people could exist. I waved at all of them and they all said hi.
Me: “Mitch your hair looks aMAZing!”
Mitch: “My hair? Yes girl thank you so much!”
So the Q&A started. This adorable little boy kept calling out questions but they were sweet and answered him. I don’t remember much of what was asked. I remember the young boy asked Kirstin who she loved the most out of Olaf, Jeremy, and Pascal.
She looked super embarrassed and took a while to answer.
Kirstin: “Jeremy, Olaf, then Pascal I guess but I love all of them.”

Everything is mostly a blur for me…until Scott called on me.
Me: “Hi! I guess this question is mostly for Avi. I was just wondering if you could explain what it’s like majoring in classical voice in college since that’s what I’m planning on doing.”
Avi: “Well it takes a lot of hard work and dedication. You have to be very focused and true to the music. But I think you’ll be fine. You have an incredible voice.”
I’m pretty sure my jaw dropped at this point.
Scott: “Yeah we all recognize you from Twitter. Your voice is beautiful so I have no doubt you’ll be super successful one day.”
Kevin: “Yeah you are so talented.”
I almost passed out. I was definitely at least bright red.

They answered a few more questions and then performed NØ for us. While they were performing, everyone was staring at the trio. I decided to watch KO and we made eye contact. He smiled at me and waved a bit.
Then we had to leave. They started walking back stage but stopped part way to talk to someone. Before I ran up the stairs, I waved over towards where they were standing and Kirstin waved back.

They led us back up to the M&G area where all the regular M&G VIP people were already lined up in front of us. I didn’t care though. I needed time for my heart rate to slow down.
All of my new squad was SQUEALING about how incredible the soundcheck was. I was still approximately the color of a tomato.
We slowly moved forward in line to get our photos taken. We watched them dab, blow kisses, hug, and even pick up a few fans.
Finally, it was almost my turn.

Now would be the time to say this: I made them gifts. These gifts were personalized necklaces. I posted photos of them on Twitter and, the day before, KO tweeted me about how pretty his necklace looked. I had a mini panic attack when I was packing to go to Florida because I thought that I had lost Kevin’s necklace. I hurriedly made a copy of it…and then immediately found the original. So I was wearing the copy to the M&G.

As I walked up, Scott started grinning.
Scott: “Hey look guys, it’s our favorite!”
When I got closer, Kevin pointed at the necklace.
KO: “Wow! It does look beautiful in real life!”
I didn’t know what to do. All I knew is that I had to move fast.
Me: “I really want to hug all of you…but since I can’t do that…Kirstin?”
I walked over between Scott and Kirstin and gathered her up into a big bear hug. And I really didn’t want to let go. But all to soon, the photos were over and I had to go to the back of the line for the autographs. I almost tripped as I was rushing away and heard Avi breathe in quickly behind me and say “Careful!”
I gathered up the M&G bag, put on the sunglasses, and hightailed it out of the room. (BTW I left the sunglasses in the rental car so I guess I’m never seeing those again sadly)

Back at the end of the line, I found my friends again and we continued gushing to each other about how amazing PTX is in real life.

Then it was time for: the actual conversation. The part I was so scared of. I’m so shy around strangers that I can barely order food from waiters without blushing and stumbling over my words.
But I put on a brave face and pulled out my bag of presents. I was watching people asking them for hugs and decided that I was just gonna go for it.
Then the fun began.
When I got to the end of the table, Kevin was having an intense conversation with the person before me about fried chicken. When they moved forward to Mitch, he finally looked up and saw me there.
KO: “Hey how are youuuu! It’s so good to finally meet you!”
KO: *hugs me before I can even say anything*
KO: “And thanks for all the covers of like everything on our Triptyq EP. That’s SO cool.”
Me: “Thank you! And also, here is the actual necklace.”
Me: *hands him the jewelry box*
KO: “Oh no! You did? Nooooo that’s so cool! Cuz what you made is so beautiful. I’m serious! Thank you!”
KO: *opens box*
KO: “Oh my GOD. Wait…”
Me: “It’s underneath the letter.”
KO: “That’s awesome! Thank you so much!”

Mitch was talking very quietly so most of this is from my memory and not the video.

Mitch: “Hi how are you!”
Me: “Good!”
Me: *hands him the jewelry box*
Mitch: “Thank you! Thank you so much!”
Mitch: “Wait what is this?”
Mitch: “Oh my God I was like ‘what does it say?’ That’s cute. That’s so cute.”

Me: Hi!
Scott: “Hi there how are you?”
Me: *nods while handing him the jewelry box*
Scott: “Oh my god thank you! That’s so nice*
Scott: *rips open box really fast*
Scott: “Oh my god I love it. OH YEAH! Did I see this on Twitter?”
Me: *giggling because I had no clue he saw it* “Yeah.”
Scott: “Okay cool! That’s so cute! Thank you.”
I don’t think he noticed the #soon carved into it and I doubt he ever will.

Kirstin: “Hi! How are you?”
Me: “I’m good!”
Me: *hands Kirstin the jewelry box*
Kirstin: “Oh my gosh. Should I open it now?”
Me: “If you want to!”
Kirstin: “What is it? Wait. I don’t know! I don’t know…I’m gonna save it. I’m…imma tweet it at you.”
Kirstin: “It’s so good to see you! How is everything?”
Me: “Um, really good!”
Kirstin: “Good. Good. I know you were auditioning and stuff so…that’s exciting! It’s good to finally see you.”
At this point the person behind me was getting annoyed and Avi cut into the conversation. Kirstin has yet to tweet me.

Avi: “So where are you auditioning?”
Me: “Um, right now I’m deciding between University of Illinois and University of Wisconsin.”
Avi: “Awesome.”
Me: “And I made you something.”
Me: *hands Avi the jewelry box*
Avi: *puts it immediately with the rest of his stuff without opening it*
Avi: “Thank you. I really appreciate it.”
Avi: “I’m really excited for you. You have a really beautiful voice.”
Me: “That means so much coming from you. Could I possibly have a hug?”
Avi: “Absolutely!”
We hugged. He’s such a good hugger.
Avi: “It was so nice to finally meet you.”

I then walked to the side of the room where they said that if we stayed, we could say quick goodbyes to them as they left.

It was as Kevin was walking by that I remembered that I had forgotten a gift.

Me: “Oh wait Kevin! I forgot to give you something!”
Kevin: “Yeah Ollie?” (At this point I almost passed out cuz he was the first one to say my name)
Me: “I almost forgot the pendant for Tara!”
Kevin: *runs over and grabs the pendant*
Kevin: “Thanks for making something for her! I know she’ll love it!”

Kirstin waved to me when she walked out. At this point, I ran down to the arena hoping that I would be able to find decent standing room since I had waited so long (I had GA). Lucky for me, my friends who had left earlier saved me a spot. Where, you might ask? Front. Row. Center.

We waited for a while for the concert to start and gotaquatinted with the people around us. Then AJ came on. He was pretty chill. His voice isn’t my favorite, but his songs were catchy.
And then it was Us The Duo. They’re literal perfection. I wish I could say much about there performance but I spent to much of it staring at them in awe to have clear memories of it.

And then it was time. PTX was about to come on stage and blow me away.
Now I know y'all already know how the concerts go, and I don’t feeling like describing every single song in excruciating detail, so I’ll skip to the more personal parts.

Let me say something a bit embarrassing: I have very bad bladder control and I have to go to the bathroom a LOT. And just as Us The Duo came on stage to sing If I Ever Fall In Love, my bladder struck.

I went sprinting through the crowd to get the bathroom without missing to much. Luckily, I run cross country so I was FAST.
I was back to the front row as Us The Duo was leaving the stage.
And everything was great again.
Or so I thought.

Apparently I ran too fast. Because my phone was no longer in my pocket. I spent the next two songs searching the GA pit, the stairs, and the bathroom for it. Yeah. Not a fun time. Like, I was feeling “worst night of my life” bad at that point. Right there, in the front row, with Mitch and Scott talking not ten feet away from me, I broke down SOBBING. Like, gross sobbing. My makeup was everywhere. If you think this is an overreaction, please know that my mother is a horrible borderline abusive person who would have made my life HELL if she found out I lost my phone. She had bought a cheap ticket at the door so she could “see what all the hype was about”. Since I didn’t want to miss anymore of the concert, I sent her a text from somebody else’s phone asking her to look for it. And I turned back to the stage and tried to smile. I wiped the mascara lines off my face and started singing along as PTX started singing NØ.
I had already heard it a billion times at soundcheck but it was even more spectacular with the lights and choreo.
Soon enough, I had mostly forgotten about the horror awaiting me with my mother.
And Scott and Mitch walked forwards. It was then that I saw them. The beanbags.
Scott: “We kind of want to bring some of you up to sing with us.”
And then he walked off the stage. Now remember what I said before. Front. Row. Center. Scott and Mitch walked by me without a second glance (though I did touch their hands as they walked by). I was so caught up in the moment that I didn’t see Kirstin approaching until she was almost right next to us. She slowed down by a group of people to my left so I thought that she had made her choice. But then she just shook hands with them and kept walking. And grabbed my hand. And stopped.
She stepped up onto a step on the other side of the guardrail, still holding my hand.

Kirstin: *looking at my group of friends* “Hi guys!”
Kirstin: *looks at me STILL HOLDING MY HAND*
At this point she could probably tell that I had been crying
Kirstin: “Are you okay?”
Me: *is too shocked by everything to talk*
Friend next to me: “She lost her phone”
Me: *is still to shocked and doesn’t want to correct the person about misgendering me I front of Kirstin*
Kirstin: “You lost your phone? That’s not good!”
Friend: “And she came all the way from Maryland!”
Kirstin: “I know! Do you wanna come sing with me Ollie?”
I was still in shock so I just kind of nodded and grinned stupidly.

She smiled and held my hand up high so that everybody knew she had chosen me.
The body guard lifted me over the railing and placed me down on the other side. My friends were screaming SO LOUD. At this point, Kirstin takes my hand again and leads me over to the stage. Everybody else is up there already. There aren’t any steps but instead a series of boxes.
Kirstin: “Be careful! We’ll step up together!”
How she did it in her heels, I don’t know.
We sat down in the pink bean bags. I turned around and looked at Avi and Scott and they smiled at me. I looked out and saw the HUGE crowd.

Is now a good time to mention my stage fright? Well, funny story, I didn’t feel any. Thousands of people watching me at once and I didn’t have a single ounce of fear. I guess I was just so high on cloud nine that I didn’t think about it too much and psych myself. Good thing, too, cuz the lights went out. And when they came back up, the song started.

I didn’t know what exactly to do so I started singing the melody. But when the chorus hit, Kirstin looked me in the eyes and somehow managed to convey what she wanted me to do. So I started singing her harmony line instead. She grinned at me, seeming really happy that I had gotten her message. And then she did something I did NOT expect her to do: she shoved the microphone towards my mouth and had me sing a few lines. After a little bit she took it back. I was still in shock that I had just heard my voice projected through the speakers for a few thousand people to hear. (Any other day, I would have fainted then and there)
I have to tell you. There is no better feeling than watching your idol grin at you while you sing. Her smile is just so pretty and her eyes are BEAUTIFUL and I could just go on and on and on about how perfect she is. Anyways…
The song continued like this. She would occasionally put the microphone up to my mouth. She wrapped her arm around me at one point and pulled me close. I was grinning like an idiot.

When we got to the bridge, she leaned in really close and just held the microphone between both of us. And we sang together like that for the whole bridge. Soon enough, though, the song was over.

As soon as it ended she leaned in and hugged me.
Kirstin: “Your voice is so good.”
She said this into my ear instead of the complements given into the microphone by the other band members to their guests. But I didn’t care. It felt more genuine that way. She put her arm around me and helped me up. Then I turned around and saw Avi waiting there. He gave me a BIG hug (have I mentioned how great his hugs are? Because his hugs are fantastic), patted me on the back, and turned me back around to where Kirstin was standing. She grabbed my hand one more time and pointed me towards the stairs for me to get back into the GA pit. And I walked off with that same stupid smile plastered on my face. I didn’t even care when somebody spilled their soda ALL OVER my poster (it dried out enough and it didn’t stain the front). The woman whose phone I borrowed handed me the phone with a text from my mom saying that she found my phone behind a seat and that it was broken. It later turned out that the phone wasn’t completely broken like she thought but just out of battery (with a little cracked screen).

I spent the rest of the concert in a daze. I didn’t go out to meet them at the bus because I didn’t want to make my mom wait. It was a good choice because it turned out that they never came outside anyways. Ugh.

Later, in my hotel room, I tweeted a grainy photo of my on stage (fun fact: there is not a single quality video or photo of that song out there anywhere. Not fun fact. Really sad fact) and Kevin responded saying “Hahaha good seeing you today”

The next morning I flew home to tell my friends the tale.
And that is the end of my first ever #PTXperience.


When I was a kid it was so easy for people to shame me for liking the Prequels. They would tell me how “you are just a kid,” and how “you’ll grow out of it,” like I had some sort of condition that I was oblivious to. Like because I was a child my opinion and tastes meant little because…I dunno why.

Now when people scoff at me for being in my twenties and loving the prequels I feel no shame whatsoever. And you want to know what’s best? The prequel haters are still very f’in vocal but lately, like in the last few years, I’ve noticed prequel lovers becoming just as vocal. It’s amazing, really. All the love is almost starting to drown out the hate. 

Though it’s still very possible a posse of haters will proverbially jump on you through the internet if you admit to liking, let alone loving the prequels, but there is now a very, very high chance that total strangers who are pro-prequels will have your back.

It’s funny. It’s been so long and the hate for the PT is still strong, but it seems all the hate has only made people become more passionate about their interest in it. 


Back then when someone went “ewwww you like the prequels??”

Originally posted by addicted-to-art-19

Now when someone goes “ewwww you like the prequels???”

Originally posted by plumkat

starter for @ofcorruption || any

Ellis had been at the library for the last few hours, reading whatever he could find that matched the oddities he’d witnessed the week before. After the books he’d gone through hadn’t given him anything, he’d turned to the internet. He’d already gone over his one hour time limit without any luck, and had bribed a couple of other people for their remaining computer time; the life of someone that barely made enough money for food every other week, let alone their own computer and internet service. So glamourous. Of course, leave it to cruel irony that just as he seemed like he was finally onto something, one of the library staff members had caught on to what he’d been doing and was berating him in a harsh whisper. His only reply was said a little bit too loud, but his frustration at missing the last few minutes he had to figure out anything beat the control he’d have otherwise had over his voice, so he didn’t notice that he was starting to draw attention from others. “So what I’ve been in here every day for a week? Isn’t the library here for people to use? It’s got freaking ‘public’ in its title.”


You guys certainly liked the chlorokinesis ask. I hope I don’t royally screw this up.

You look around, making sure you’re alone. Walking a little further into the forest, a safe distance from all the people, you let go of the breath you didn’t know you were holding. You hold your hand out and watch as the flower you were thinking of appears. It’s always been this easy for you. But you weren’t stupid, you know what happened to people like you. They’ll think I’m like her, you think. You only knew of one other person with your power. Poison Ivy. You watched her often, at least on the news or on the Internet. You looked up to her, because she knew how to use her powers, but you despised her, because she’s hurting people instead of trying to help them. You didn’t want anyone to think you were like her, so you kept your powers a secret, only ever using them like this, alone. Sighing, you decide to practice a move you taught yourself recently. You wrap yourself in vines, layers of them, and let your muscles get used to the feeling of using your powers. It’s been weeks since you were last able to really practice like this. Sure, you help your little garden grow in your apartment and run a small flower business, but those hardly allowed much of your powers to flow. Feeling the bend of the vines, you hear something coming closer to you. And fast. You quickly let the vines fall from your body, but it wasn’t fast enough. A flash of yellow passes your vision, but skids and retraces it’s steps. You see a man, no older than you, dressed in a silly costume. You recognize him. He was in your biology class last year. Wally West. But now you know he’s also Kid Flash. You grimace and turn quickly from him. He grabs your arm “Please, don’t leave. What are you doing in the woods alone? Something could’ve happened to you”. You sigh out of relief. Maybe he didn’t see you using your powers. “I like being by myself. I feel safer out here than I do with people around” you say, not exactly lying. Just, withholding some of the truth. He looks at you, not sure whether to believe you or not. You decide to tell him you know who he is. “West, I know it’s you behind that mask. You really should consider contacts and a wig. I’m surprised no one has recognized you before” you say. He looks at you surprised, his green eyes widening. “It’s me, Y/N, we had biology together last year” you state. He looks you up and down, a face of recognition replacing his shock. “Y/N!!!! Of course! I remember how interested you were in plants. I’m guessing that has to do with your powers?” You reel back, panic setting in. He knows? He know? He knows?????? You laugh nervously “What are you talking about West? I don’t have powers.” He looks at you incredulously “I just saw you using them Y/N.” Really starting to freak out, you start running, which wasn’t a good idea. Wally easily caught you. “Hey, I’m not gonna tell anyone okay? I promise. I think you should consider giving my team a thought though. We could use a strong, chlorokinetic person on our side.” He smiles at you reassuringly and you relax. You nod, hoping he’ll let you go soon. “I’ll think about it”. He looks you over once more and nods. As you start to leave, Wally grabs your hand. “Why don’t we have coffee sometime this week?” He winks at you and runs off, leaving nothing but a piece of paper with his number on it.

I know this isn’t exactly what you guys wanted, but I hope it’s sufficient?! Also, holy crap it’s long!!!

SO HERES MY STORY FOR TATINOF FT LAUDERDALE. Well, I live kind of by Orlando so I had about a 3 ½ hour drive to get to the venue and me and my friend Madison (@85Ultraviolence on Twitter) were one of first people to arrive. We had to sit in this outdoor area until someone came and got us for VIP (which took about two hours). But while we waited some workers for the tour came out and asked us about weird kid stories and Internet support group questions and they were so nice! Once we were allowed in for VIP (which could have easily been snuck in to just saying) we got a red wristband and sat in a pretty chill room with tables and chairs around the room. everyone talked with each other about random stuff and it was so welcoming so dONT WORRY IF YOU’RE GOING ALONE!! YOU’LL MEET PEOPLE! Once Dan and Phil came out from behind the curtain there was screaming but they were so kind and Dan said “let’s have a meet up!” and it all started. everyone got in line and waited to be brought up on stage to meet them. When I went up I said “Hey there!!!!” very happily and Phil asked how I was doing and I said “I’m great! How are you??” and Dan said “very good thank you very much” and while this was going on I was giving them such big hugs like I didn’t want to let go of Phil ever but I had to (sadly). They then asked if I wanted my book signed (which was already open to the page I wanted signed) so they signed it and then handed the book back to me. Dan asked if i wanted him to take a selfie of us and I said “yes and can we also have a full body one afterwards” and Dan just said “Okay.” and took the selfie (amazing good words Dan). so Dan asked the security guard that was on stage if he could take the picture. Dan was about to put his arm around me for a normal picture but I quickly said “can we do a force choke picture??” and Dan said something like “oh yea lets do it alright” so we took the picture anD I LOVE IT. (my selfie is ugly but whatever) and then I started to walk off stage and they said goodbye so kindly and Phil waved and smiled as I walked off but I was like SHIT I FORGOT TO ASK MY QUESTIONS BECAUSE I HAD LIKE A FULL SPEECH PLANNED SO I RAN BACK ON STAGE. The security guard on stage was like NO NO NONONO you need to get off you need to go and I was begging begging begging to let me ask my questions because I would have regretted everything if I didn’t. and Dan and Phil were watching this and kind of nodded saying it was okay and watched me as I was literally saying everything so fast trying to be able to ask before this security guard pushed me off the stage. (he was just doing his job) I asked “What’s your favourite Star Wars movie?” first and Dan said “oooo I think I’m going to have to go with Revenge of the Sith” (although he said Avenge of the Sith but let’s ignore that) ((btw that’s my fave too good choice Dan)) and Phil answered but I didn’t hear him at the time. So then I asked “what’s your fave fall out boy album?” and Dan said “hmmm I’m going to have to say From Under The Cork Tree” (god is real) and then I don’t think Phil really answered he just said “I’m still stuck on that Star Wars question!” and I smiled and said “wait what did you say for the Star Wars thing again?” and he said “oh Empire Strikes Back!” and I said great choice! and I thanked them again because they could have so easily been like “ew rat get her off the stage she had her turn” but they’re so so kind and just want your m&g to be everything you hoped for. So I walked off for the final time and sat on a chair contemplating life while the rest of the m&g went on. The m&g only lasted for about an hour (maybe a tiny bit more) and then they came back out to say goodbye and that they’d see us at the show and walked behind the stage again. Then it was time for the show! I WONT GIVE SPOILERS!!!! I was second row center stage (I died) and I won’t tell you what happened really but Phil threw confetti in my face (life is good) and my friend caught phils mouth germs lets just say that. And obviously we know they do a weird kids segment since they put it in their participation video so Madison got on the screen for her weird kid story and they made so many joKES BASED ON HER I WAS CRYING FROM LAUGHTER. I don’t want to give anything away though so I won’t say much else. But I cried at like 3 points during the show because it made me feel so happy and okay with myself. I hope you all get to enjoy Tatinof whether it’s VIP or not you’ll have a wonderful time I can guarantee that! (and yes the force choke was for all of you ‘force choke me dad’ stans as I’m one myself)

**if you share on social media please give me credit:
Twitter: liamloveslourry
Tumblr: phantasieshowell
Instagram: soul.punk.sky

One of those surveys ‘cause I’m bored

Name ➔ Jacob
Birth place ➔  Plantation, FL
Hair color ➔ brunette
Age ➔ 18
Eye Color ➔ brown
Birthday ➔ September 15th
Gender ➔ male
Lefty or Righty ➔ righty
Single or taken? ➔  single
Happy? ➔ generally yeah

Are you in love ➔ nope
Do you believe in love at first sight ➔ sure
Who ended your last relationship ➔ me
Have you ever broken someone’s heart ➔ idono, they were upset at the time
Are you afraid of commitments ➔ i don’t think so?
Have you hugged someone within the last week? ➔ yes
Have you ever had a secret admirer ➔ *shrug*
Have you ever broken your own heart? ➔ um probs no
Do you usually spend Valentine’s Day alone? ➔ I’m always single, but never alone
Short or long-term relationships? ➔ let’s have one first

Love or lust ➔ depends
Lemonade or iced tea ➔ lemonade
Cats or Dogs ➔ cats
A few best friends or many regular friends ➔ a few best friends, but I’m ‘real bad at people so
Television or internet ➔ internet
Pepsi or Coke ➔ root beer
Wild night out or romantic night in ➔ in
Day or night ➔ night
Text or Call ➔ text
Make-up or au naturel? ➔ au naturel (mostly)

Been caught sneaking out? ➔ noop
Fallen down/up the stairs? ➔ hourly
Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? ➔ who hasn’t lol
Prank called a store? ➔ no
Skipped school? ➔ yes
Wanted to disappear? ➔ nah
Spent all your money? ➔ yes
Met a celebrity? ➔ i shook hands will Bill Clinton once. And I got an autograph from Idina Menzel’s sister
Been really ill? ➔ yeah
Gotten high? ➔ no

Smile or eyes ➔ smile
Light or dark hair ➔ dark?
Shorter or taller ➔ shorter (but not short and buff, that weirds me out a lil)
Intelligence or attraction ➔ attraction

Hook-up or relationship
➔ can I go back and forth
Funny and poor or rich and serious ➔ mOnEY
Mac or PC? ➔ I have a mac but everything’s online so idc
Chapstick or lipstick? ➔ chapstick erryday, lipstick is for special occasions
City or country? ➔ city
Driving or walking? ➔ driving

Last phone call? ➔ bff
Last song you listened to?
➔ uhrm La Vie En Rose karaoke
Last thing you ate? ➔ split-pea soup
Last thing you drank? ➔ water
Last place you were? ➔ my house
Last (romantic) kiss? ➔ peck at a christmas party
Last picture taken? ➔ my screen when I got to 1111 followers
Last outfit? ➔ gym shorts and a white tee (my jammies)
Last purchase? ➔ ice cream
Last argument/fight? ➔ if I should go to college here (CO) with bae or in Florida where there are gay bars (mostly a joke argument. I think.)