I cannot afford the insemination so I’ve been thinking about plan B and I propose that when the time is right, you go into your room with magazines or skinemax or whatever you need to get yourself ready, and then, with the lights out, you signal me by calling out my name, once, and then you’ll hear your door open, footsteps, and then you’ll be mounted. You will finish your business inside of me as quickly and efficiently as possible and then I’ll be out the door, you can clean up or whatever you need do to at which point I will need to be alone. Most likely to cry …. Thanks for listening.
—  Leslie Elizabeth Shay, Chicago Fire