les miserables cosette

Little Les Mis™ Things

-the beginnings of the barricade songs
-“EVEN A WHORE WHO HAS GONE TO THE BAD WON’T BE HAD BY A RAT!!!”
-Thenardier calling Cosette by the wrong name
-“Little he knows, little he sees”
-the three part counterpoint at the end of a heart full of love
-the three part counterpoint at the end of a heart full of love reprise/everyday
-“Thinks he’s quite a lover, but there’s not much there”
-when the “JAVERT!"s match up in the confrontation
-the feeling in your chest when everyone starts singing in the finale

bonus:
-gavroche singing the women’s part of drink with me in the les mis movie

I just can’t stop thinking about Beauty Guru Cosette because it’s the absolute purest thing:

  • Cosette reclaims pastel pink as a fierce colour and makes it her brand, showing the world that softness isn’t a weakness but an act of bravery when the rest of the world tries to bring you down
  • She has this whole segment in which she reads hate comments and literally kills them with kindness, saying she’s sorry about their internalised anger and that she wishes them well, because a happy person wouldn’t leave comments like these
  • She promotes mental health and well-being, all with a cheerful and positive attitude, helping many people in the process
  • During the whole “Men can’t wear makeup” controversy, Cosette invited Courfeyrac and Montparnasse to do a video with her, and launched a #makeupisgenderneutral hashtag on twitter, which trended HARD.
  • Speaking of collabs, she often works with Musichetta and Bahorel on little fashion reviews and body positivity videos
  • Jehan records the little ukulele music that plays in the videos
  • She did a “My dad does my makeup” challenge, thinking it’d be hilarious since Valjean has seemingly no clue how makeup works. But Valjean did absolutely brilliantly? Cosette was totally blown away, but Valjean just shrugged it off: “Of course I know how to do it; I watch your videos. I keep in touch with what my daughter does and love, and I couldn’t be prouder.”
  • Cosette teared up on camera, ruining Valjean’s hard work, and hugged her dad so hard she couldn’t breathe. It remains, to this day, the most viewed video on her channel

Imagine Marius trying super hard to impress JVJ the first time he meets him and he’s just stumbling over his words and messing up and he’s just a massive bundle of nerves. And JVJ is there like “ yes hello I am the serious father” but like he’s just dying because oh my god bless this boy.

And then they have dinner and they go to say grace and JVJ is like

“Our father who art in heaven

thank you for blessing us with this food

And Lord, if you’re listening, let Marius Pontmercy know that he is welcome in my house and to my family and that the plate he accidentally broke that Cosette sneakily cleared away was an ugly plate and I’m glad it is broken.”

And anyways he can no longer keep a straight face and he bursts out laughing, followed not long after by Cosette and Marius feels like he could cry from relief and he’s so happy.

Mincing Mockingbird + Les Mis

No one seems to have done this yet, so I’m taking it upon myself. Warning: this is gonna be a long ass post.

Valjean:

Javert:

Fantine:

Cosette:

Marius:

Eponine:

Enjolras:

Combeferre:

Courfeyrac:

Jehan:

Montparnasse:

Joly:

Bossuet:

Musichetta:

Feuilly:

Bahorel:

Grantaire:

Gavroche:

M. Thenardier:

Mme. Thenardier:

Les Misérables
  • Valjean: i stole fucking bread
  • Javert: five years
  • Valjean: i tried to check on my family you piece of shit
  • Javert: fourteen more
  • Valjean: im free
  • Javert: technically,,,, you're not,,,,, but ok,,,,
  • Bishop: hey u look like ur having trouble come over at my place
  • Valjean: fuck it
  • Valjean: *steals*
  • Javert: ffs you wouldn't be in jail if-
  • Bishop: no it's cool i gave him that shit
  • Javert: oh.
  • 20 years later or smth
  • Valjean: aye im mayor now
  • Fantine: i have a daughter you inconsiderate imbeciles
  • Fantine's boss and coworkers: fuck you
  • Fantine: i don't want to do this
  • Valjean: u don't have to
  • Valjean: hey kid u want some candy
  • Cosette: fuck yea
  • Thénardiers: you want her? go have her
  • 20 more years later i think
  • Éponine: i lowkey love you
  • Marius: im oblivious as shit. ooOO a HOT girl
  • Cosette: ooOO a HOT guy
  • Marius: hey, take me to her
  • Éponine: ok
  • Éponine: (kill me)
  • Enjolras: REVOLUTION
  • Grantaire: you're gonna get us killed, moron
  • Grantaire: (but you're my moron)
  • Les Amis de'lABC: we died.
  • Éponine: me too
  • Valjean: mY FUTURE SON IN LAW IS DEAD
  • Javert: sTOP R I G H T THERE
  • Valjean: *gives Javert guilt trip*
  • Javert: oh
  • Javert: oh shit
  • Javert: *kills himself*
  • A year later I think
  • Marius: all my friends are dead
  • Cosette: i love you
  • Marius: love u too
  • Valjean: im dying
  • Cosette: please,,,, god,,,, no,,,, enough people have DIED already
  • Fantine: hey old pal. ur awesome
  • Éponine: u protected my crush. ur awesome
  • Bishop: ur awesome
  • Everyone: we're all awesome!!

‘Average book talks about the Parisian sewage system for 50 pages’ factoid is actually a statistical error - Victor Hugo’s 'Les Miserables’ which talks about the Parisian sewage system for 5000 pages is an outlier and should not have been counted.