leo that 70&

zodiac posts be like

“the signs as things”
Aries: fire thing
Taurus: hungry thing
Gemini: 2 things
Cancer: cries a lot
Leo: made of solid gold idfk
Virgo: vacuum cleaner
Libra: nerd
Scorpio: evil thing
Sagittarius: rly fast thing
Capricorn: ambitious
Aquarius: water
Pisces: emotional water

10

Can we take a minute and appreciate these lines because they are so relatable?

  • Leo: Lets just do Rock Paper Scissors to see who Jason's best man is?
  • Percy: No, no, no, no. I hate that game I always lose
  • Leo: Cause you always pick rock
  • Percy: That's because nothing beats rock
  • Leo: Paper beats rock
  • Percy: Not buying it
  • Leo: Fine, we'll play a new game. How about cockroach, foot, nuclear bomb? Foot squashes cockroach, nuclear bomb squashes foot, cockroach survives nuclear bomb
  • Percy: Oh thats great. I'll be nuclear bomb, nothing beats nuclear bomb
  • Leo: cockroach beats nuclear bomb
  • Percy: Oh we'll see about that
  • [Later]
  • Leo: One two three go
  • [Leo picks cockroach, Percy picks nuclear bomb]
  • Leo: Cockroach beats nuclear bomb. Thats 38 wins in a row. I think its safe to say I'm the best man
  • Percy; Wait a minute, i just noticed something. Cockroach always wins. One more time
  • Leo: Fine. One two three go
  • [Leo picks foot, Percy picks cockroach]
  • Percy: Foot, I forgot about foot. So foot always wins. One more time. Winner, best man, period.
  • Leo: One two three
  • [Leo picks nuclear bomb, Percy picks foot]
  • Percy: Bomb! Nuclear bomb beats foot. Its like everything in this game loses to something else
  • Leo: Yes, it's exactly like that
  • Percy: Wait. Except. Aha! I was so blind. Nuclear bomb beats everything. One more time, winner take all.
  • [Leo picks cockroach, Percy picks bomb]
  • Percy: Im going home
  • Jason: No way Leo, I can’t believe you finally lost your virginity.
  • Piper: Wait, this isn’t like the time you bought a hamster, named it Virginity, and then lost it, is it?
  • Leo: No, this is the real thing.
  • Percy: I had a hamster once. Tied him to a hydrogen balloon with a note. He made it all the way to New Jersey.
  • Piper: Alive?
  • Percy (sarcastically): No, I’m gonna send a dead hamster up in a balloon.