legs up..close eyes

Who We Are - Dean and Donna

An addition to episode 12.22, Who We Are, that came to me last night. This does contain spoilers, so beware.

Originally posted by canonspngifs

It was like a siren’s call, her name. He’d been sitting in the chair, leg up, eyes closed, trying to pretend his mother wasn’t locked in the room down the hall, tied to a chair, gagged, or that fellow hunters were dead, or that he was in immense pain. He was groggy from the pain meds he’d found in the Impala’s trunk, his eyes drooping as he listened to Sam and Jody at the table, listing all the hunters they knew. Sam was efficiently writing them on a pad of paper with Jody’s name embossed across the top and Jody was calling them.

“Donna?”

His eyes flew open and he was out of the chair lightning fast, grimacing as he strode across the room. Jody had her cell phone pressed to her ear, her eyes widening when she saw him rambling toward her. He stopped in front of her and held out his hand, gesturing for the phone. She held up one finger, glaring at the wounded hunter.

“Donna? Dean wants to talk to you,” she said. She held the phone out.

Dean snatched it from her hand, earning him a dirty look from Jody. He sank into one of the chairs at the table.

“Donna? You okay?” he murmured.

“Yeah, yeah,” she sighed. “What about you? Jodes said you were hurt? Somethin’ about your leg?”

“I’m fine.” He rubbed his forehead, grimacing. “You’re not coming here, right? You’re staying in Stillwater.” It wasn’t a question. He braced himself, waiting for her to explode on him, waiting for her to tell him that she could take care of herself, she didn’t need him telling her what to do, that she would damn well do what she pleased.

“I won’t,” she whispered. “I’m gonna meet Alex and Claire at a safehouse. I promised Jody I’d keep her girls safe. But, Dean -”

“I’ll be fine, gorgeous,” he assured her. “Don’t worry about me.”

“I’m gonna though,” she laughed, breathy and sexy.

Dean chuckled. “I know. You be careful. Promise me, Donna.”

“I promise,” she said. “I swear I’ll be careful.” He heard the hitch in her voice, heard the tears he knew she was holding back. “I want the same promise out of you, Dean. I’m not done with you.”

“I promise.” he swore. “I swear to you I’ll be careful.” He meant it, meant every word, meant it to the depths of his soul. He had too much to live for.

“I love you, Dean,” Donna whispered.

“I love you, too, gorgeous.”

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anonymous asked:

hi! do you have any meditation tips? i'm a beginner i suppose, i'm exploring my beliefs and deciding if i can really commit to this practice. i have terrible ADD and have never been able to meditate well. i really want to try again, but am not sure where to start

Hello there ~☽♡☾

Sure, meditation is something I try to do very often!

Meditation Tips

  • Be sure to elevate your back when meditating; not only does this help to retain posture, but having a strong, straight back allows for stronger energy flow. Sit on a small pillow at the end of your spine, yet make sure that your crossed legs are not elevated. (Sit with only the back half of your back-end on the pillow, in other words!)
  • While meditating regularly has it’s benefits (daily or weekly), as a person with low motivation and energy at times, I know how difficult it can be to keep on with it. It’s absolutely alright if you cannot bring yourself to meditate regularly, though you should certainly try! On a related note: meditating for as little as 5 minutes in the beginning is still very helpful; it doesn’t always have to be for long periods of time
  • If you cannot focus while meditating in the traditional way (sitting up, legs crossed, eyes closed) there are many other ways you can do it! You can set up a focus point to keep your eyes on as you clear your mind (I find that a tea candle in a dim - not dark - room is nice), you can lay down if your back is prone to pain while sitting straight, you can use ‘visual meditation’, etc.
  • When meditating, the ultimate goal is often to clear your mind. The point you want to reach is a feeling of peace, floating, and just ‘being’ without actively thinking about those things at all. In the beginning, however, it’s totally fine if you have to focus your mind on a single thing! For example, I will often focus on my breathing in a particular pattern, while visualizing a lotus flower opening with my inhale, and closing with my exhale. 

That’s all I can think of for now, but others are more than welcome to contribute ~  I hope this helps, and wish you the best of luck with exploring your capabilities and practices! 

➺ Rainy

Unconditional (Part 8) *slight smut*

Fandom: Celebrities
Pairing: Reader x Sebastian Stan
Words: 1, 248
Warnings: smut in the beginning, also maybe annoyance? maybe even sadness. 
Request: yes or no
Inspired By:
Parts: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
A/N: here is part 8 I apologize for it being up late. also there is slight smut in the beginning like right smack in the beginning! so to avoid that just scroll down about nine paragraphs to avoid the smut :) that is all.
Tags: @almondbuttercup @oldschoolcalifornia @sailorchibimoonunicorn

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On my own (OQ)

For @dee-thequeenbee and @flyingbluebirds. All my love to @ginaandrobbie (it’s only barely what you suggested anymore, but thank you nonetheless).

Rated P for pain, and R for rain.

I apologize.


It’s raining. Again.

It seems like it hasn’t stopped since. And it’s been a whole year, now.

She’s sitting by her apple tree in the back yard, the recovered drawing of Robin and her clutched in her right hand, her left hand absent-mindedly tracing the tape meant to fix it.

The ink is starting to fade. Of lying under bunches and bunches of pens, reports, folders and what not. Of that one time when Roland was searching for crayons in her office and accidentally found it, before giving it to his little sister to show her “look, this is what Papa looked like”. Of her grabbing it from him to pop it into her small, wet mouth, tugging and licking at it, like babies do when you give them something. Of Regina trying to salvage it again, waving it in the air and blowing at it, all the while wishing she’d kept it somewhere else, somewhere safe from harm – one of the only things she had left of her… her dead boyfriend, their dead father, everyone’s dead friend. Of the months after, when she’d spent her nights falling asleep with it lying under her pillow, giving her a false sense of solace and comfort. And of the thick raindrops falling onto it now.

Her index finger is caressing his hair, smudging it in the process, slowly wiping it away, slowly, until there won’t be any more proof of it left. No more proof of him left.

She rests her back against the trunk and she pretends he’s sitting behind her, tries to pretend that it’s his back she’s leaning on.

But she can’t. And she sighs.

It’s your fault, she thinks. It’s all your fault. And she believes it.

She rests her hand on her leg and looks up with closed eyes, allowing the rain falling in through the leaves to touch her, and to, eventually, she hopes, consume her fully.

She cups her head in her palms and–

Her eyes shoot open at the nearby smell of paint. She looks down at her palm, finding nothing that even resembles the colour of her skin. It’s all brown. And white. And beige and red and black and all sad colours in between. Her gaze shifts to the page, their page. She’s no longer looking at the image of Robin and her on the brink of their first kiss, she’s not even looking at Robin anymore. There’s just her. And a wet, ugly smear of her hand where Robin once was.

She gasps and looks back at her palm, and in a hurried, hopeless attempt to save it, she presses her hand firmly against the paper again, laying it on the grass while sitting up on her knees. She breathes heavily while pushing her hand against the paper as hard as she can. She closes her eyes and tears begin to fall, mingling with the rain on her lap, on her hand, on him. It’s then that she realizes she’s making it worse and she removes her hand in a swift move, only to reveal the torn paper, the heavy creases, the water – there’s so much wetness, so much of it. And she sobs and she cries and she pants and she “no! Robin, please, no!”

And there she is now, crying on the wet grass of her back yard, her knees pulled up to her chest, the picture that once was everything to her, lifelessly lying beside her head.

There she is. On her own.

“Please don’t leave me again.”

But he already has.

A moment like this

A/N: Okay, first I have to say that I have written this before 12x10. This is what I was expecting them to forgive each other. But I am happy how it had turned out, it is even more perfect than my version. However, mabye you are going to like it. This is my third fanfiction and it’s pretty long. But I really don’t know how to add a ‘read more’ so I am sorry. xo T

A Moment like this

“Falling in love is a crazy thing to do.
It’s like a socially, acceptable form of insanity.”


Being an addict is like a rollercoaster. There are up, downs and maybe even looping. Owen Hunt is like a looping. A looping Amelia never wants to stop. What she had learned from her past is that after a looping a massive down is taking place. The only thing she wants to do is froze the time and that for her entire life. Owen Hunt is a looping. He’ll ever be. He let her feel the high and the rush that only Oxy gave her before.

When she entered the Attending Lounge and spotted the Ginger sitting o the couch, legs propped up, Eyes closed and regular breathe while her breath stopped. Her heart is beating fast, her throat went dry and butterflies are flying a marathon in her stomach. She is craving about him.

She cleared her throat and headed over to the coffee machine. It was like her best friend since Owen ignored her. She can’t sleep without him anymore. Amelia needs his hot chest against her back, his knees behind her ones, his scent overwhelming her. And this is scaring her like hell.

When Owen had heard the little cough, he opened his eyes. He spotted the brown headed Neurosurgeon at the coffee machine. She looked sad, red eyes, pale skin, dry lips. He hates it to see her like that, to know you are one of the reasons she is sad and terrified. With her coffee in the hand, she turned around about to leave this place where she was just feeling helpless and distraught, while Owen was there. Their blue pearls met for a second or more, both couldn’t. Owen could just tell that this special shine, he is craving to see, left her. His heart crashed into million pieces. Her tiny frame shivered and turned around toward the door, leaving the room in a fast pace.

While she opened the door she lost something. She lost lot of things in the last time. Her sobriety. Her sister. But this time it was a photograph. A Photograph that she is keeping with her since, she took it.
Owen rubbed his red, stubby chin watching it falling to the ground.

“Amelia, I think you have lost something.” he shouted after her.

But Amelia was to far away, in the nearest On Call Room she could find. Hot tears are running down her creamy cheek. No man had made her cry that much before and she hates this fact.

Owen stood up from the couch, heading over the thing on the cold hospital floor. He knelt down in front of it; take it in his big hands. As he knew what the thing is, a gasp left his mouth. It’s a picture of Owen and Amelia after the failed Dinner Party. He can remember pretty good how they took it.

Amelia is nuzzling her nose into his warm, safe chest. His hands were left in her dark brown, silky curls. He ever had a thing for them.

“You smell so good.” she muttered lost. Didn’t know she have spoken it out loud, Owen added “You too, Mia.”

Her cheeks turned red, from the embarrassment.

“Everything alright.” he pecked her lips “Have I told you, how pretty you are today before?”

She smiled, her dimples appeared. Their pearls met. They just could feel the love between them.

“Can I take a Photo? You look even more handsome than I today.”

“We can.” He pecked a light kiss on her nose “But this is impossible.”

“You like to kiss me today, don’t you major?”

“Actually I do.”, he muttered while he took his mobile phone out of his jeans pocket.

“So kiss me.”

*klick*

He did. The photo was shot, but they didn’t care. Lips are dancing, fire exploding, Tongue are teasing the other.

He rubbed his thumb over the picture, capturing it where his heart is. He missed her, with all his passion. He needs her. So he had to talk to her. He was the one who destroyed it – He had to be the one who fix it. Before everything is falling apart even further.

Amelia was standing at the Nurse station, when the Ginger walked around the corner. He had something in his hand walking strait past her. Her stomach flipped, she gave the tablet back to a nurse and turned around to just walk away like she did it the last few days. But this time Owen Hunt wasn’t playing this game with her.

“Dr.Shepherd, I need to talk to you!” he shouted behind her.

She whimpered as his voice hit her like a wracking ball. Inside her head was a mess, she didn’t know if she should turn around and just talk to him or if she should stay hard walking into the toilet she spotted a few meters in front of her. Just to run away. Just to run away from Owen. Just to run away from all the feelings inside.

“Dr.Shepherd” Owen tried again.

Ad this time Amelia stopped and muttered quick, “Hunt, how can I help you?”
She turned around with a faked smile; her eyes still had this sad sparkle. Her head said ‘Stop.’; her heart said ‘Go on!’ and even if this is sometimes the more stupid version she heard what her heart said. She mustered him, for the first time in 6 weeks. He looked terrified, tired and powerless.

“Care to go somewhere private?”

Owen guided her into the next On-Call Room, his hand rested on the small of her back and she winced once. The last time he had touched her was in the bed, he had a hell of a night shift and she gave him a nice way to wake up. Cuddling. When they entered the Room, Owen sat down on the table and Amelia is fighting against her tears. She didn’t want to cry in front of him. She is so much stronger than this.

“God, you can’t … You can’t… touch me. Just don’t.” tears are welling into her eyes.

“I am Sorry. It is a habit. I didn’t want to push you to something you don’t want.”, his eyes scanned her pale face.

“It’s just that you can’t touch me.” she whines “I haven’t slept since 6 weeks I am exhausted. God… Why … Why am I telling you my problems? I don’t want to talk anything to death.”
Amelia quoted his words and Owen opened his mouth. His one words hurt him inside and his heart is just crashing again.

“You lost something when you ran out of the Attending Lounge.” He raised his hand, handing the picture to her. Amelia scanned the picture, shocked her head like she couldn’t believe what she saw. She fucked up again. Her cheeks turned red in embarrassment. Amelia’s hand wet down to her lab coat feeling nothing than emptiness in it.

“Oh… I see!”

She reached for the picture and took it back into her white lab coat pocket.

“Do you need something more?” her voice tremble and their blue pearls locked.


“Actually I do!”

Amelia laughed and shaked her head as she realized the ironic of his words. Actually I do. Actually I do. Actually I do.


“What do you want Owen? It’s just… I am so tired… But I can’t sleep because I need you by my side…” she spoke, to fast, without thinking about what she said. As she realized, she just shake her head again. Her soft locks are bouncing around and all what Owen wanted to do was to put his hands inside. He always had a thing for her hairs. He always had a thing for her.

“Do you think I can sleep?” he answered and took a few steps forward her “Do you really think I can sleep without you snuggling at my chest? Without your scent all around my Trailer, because of the Shower we took before. Do you really think I can?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know what to think or what to do. God… I don’t know!” Tears are welling down her soft cheeks, letting them shine because of the wetness. Owen reached his hand forward, cupping her cheek and stroked the tears gently aside. She gasped at his touch. Skin to skin. 


“I miss you so much!” she whimpered lightly, leaning inside the touch.

“I know… I know, Mia.” Owen added “What if I told you that it was all meant to be. Would you believe me? Would you agree? I just have the feeling that we met before. So tell me you don’t think I am crazy, because I can feel the love between us. I know I have done mistakes, a lot but I just wanted… God, I just wanted to protect you. From my PTSD.”

“Why? I am a God damn Neurosurgeon; I could have helped you, Owen. I could have helped you.”

“Because I love you, Amelia. When it’s about me, you are not my Doctor. You are the person I love most. Please understand that I did this; that I pushed you away because I love you and wanted to protect you.”

Noses touched, breathe hitched, lips met in a soft, tender, unrushed kiss. Amelia moaned against his mouth, feeling the month of his absence exploding somewhere behind in her brain and the need rushing through her veins. Her hands are grabbing his elbow for steady. Both shivered. How they have missed the presence of each other. The scent overwhelmed both; lips taste salty from the tears before.

Everything they need was each other and they are on a good way to accept, understand and support each other in dark and good times. Because others wait a lifetime for a moment like this. For the one special kiss.

Everything changes but beauty remains
Something so tender
I can’t explain
Well I may be dreaming
But till I awake
Can’t we make this dream last forever?
And I’ll cherish all the love we share

A moment like this
Some people wait a lifetime
For a moment like this
Some people search forever
For that one special kiss
Oh I can’t believe it’s happening to me
Some people wait a lifetime
For a moment
Like this

ONLY PRESS PLAY WHEN IT SAYS TO

IMAGINE ten years from now, you find your old iPod from your teenage years. You decide to take a listen. You walk to the soft couch and settle down. its a lazy spring morning, you’re comfy in sweats with your hair down, the windows are open, the air smells crisp and fresh, the blinds are up, rays of sun pouring in, warming your legs up. You close your eyes and press shuffle.

And then this plays (PRESS PLAY NOW)

Immediately your body recognises the oh so familiar opening melody, filling you with love and nostalgia and happiness.

Then the singer starts singing and you drown yourself in his smooth voice. As his voice echoes through the room, your husband walks in smirking, and says

“I sound good there, eh?”

He joins in with himself, “TELL ME WHERE YOU WANNA GO, WE CAN LEAVE MAKE IT FEEL LIKE HOME, IF YOU’RE READY LET ME KNOW AND WE’LL FLY TO PARTS UNKNOWN!” He grabs your arm and pulls you off the sofa, a wild glaze in his eyes.

image

“come on babe, let’s go somewhere”

“right now?” You ask.

“hell yeah,”