legolas*

The Six Types of Middle-Earth Names

1. Characters whose Names are Secretly Insults: 

Samwise: means “Half-wise” or “Half-wit.” He is Stupid Gamgee

Faramir: Boromir’s name means “steadfast jewel”, but Faramir’s name just means “sufficient jewel.”

Sufficient.

Denethor took one look at baby Faramir and thought “eh I guess he exists or whatever” which is very in character

 2. Characters who Have Way Too Many Names

Examples include Aragorn son of Arathorn son of Arador heir of Isildur Elendil’s son, descendant of Numenor,  Thorongill,  Eagle of the Star,  Dúnadan, Strider,  Wingfoot, Longshanks, Elessar, Edhelharn, Elfstone, Estel (”Hope,”) The Chieftain of the Dúnedain, King of the West, High King of Gondor and Arnor, and Envinyatar the Renewer of the House of Telcontar

Wait I’m sorry did I say “examples” plural

Cuz that was all one guy

3. Characters whose parents must’ve been prophets

-Frodo means “wise by experience.” His story is about becoming wise by experience
-A lady named Elwing turns into a bird (geddit)

4. Characters whose families were so lazy that they copy-pasted the same first half of a name onto multiple people

Théoden/Théodred 
Aragorn/Arathorn/Arador 
Éomer/ Éomund/Éowyn/Éorl
Elladan/Elrohir/Elrond/Elros/Elwing/Elenwë/Elendil/Eldarion (the laziest family) 

5.Characters whose Names are Expertly Designed so that Newbies can’t Remember Who is Who and Feel Sad

All the people mentioned in number 4
Celeborn, Celegorm, Celebrimbor, Celebrian
All the rhyming dwarf names in the Hobbit
Sauron and Saruman
Arwen and Éowyn

6. Name so nice, you say it twice

Legoas Greenleaf: Legolas’s first name means “Greenleaf” in elvish. Legolas is Greenleaf Greenleaf (thranduil really likes green leaves ok)

King Théoden’s name means King in Rohirric. Tolkien decided to name his king “King.” All hail King King



 this is what the fanbase means when we say tolkien was a creative genius with language

Thranduil: So, whose plan was it to send my son and a bunch of other kids to destroy the One Ring in Mordor?

*silence*

Thranduil: Let me guess, is it the same genius who send a bunch of dwarves and a hobbit to kill a dragon and reclaim a mountain?

Gandalf: …

Thranduil: Or is it the one who couldn’t manage to kick one mortal guy’s ass and led whole world to disaster?

Elrond: …

Thranduil: I guess it’s way too stupid to only one of you to come up with. You must have collaborated.

Legolas must be so confused about death

In the screenwriters’ and actor’s commentary/interviews for Lord of the Rings, they say they portrayed Legolas as an immortal elf who’s always lived among immortal elves, who has never encountered death or grief before. 

His “arc” in Lord of the Rings is about confronting death for the first time in his immortal life, and struggling to understand it.

But like…Legolas must be so confused by the idea of death??? Because everyone who “dies” keep coming back???? 

Just imagine: 

Legolas: So when is Boromir coming back?
Aragorn: Legolas…Boromir’s dead.
Legolas: Gandalf was dead. He’s back.
Aragorn: That’s different—
Legolas: You fell off that cliff, and you came back.
Aragorn: But I wasn’t really—
Legolas: Merry and Pippin were dead, but they came back.
Aragorn: But they–
Legolas: *busy looking around for Boromir*