legit just pooped this out like this

the bf and i really dislike this one halo pro player (bc he’s racist and has fucked other players over like he’s legit a snake and doesn’t deserve his pro seed) but we’re also wary of wishing ill on anyone so we spent the last ten minutes coming up w/ mean things that aren’t actually harmful like

“i wish his clothes always come out of the dryer still slightly damp.”
“i wish whenever he goes to poop that there’s only one square of toilet paper left.” 
“i wish he would develop a slight food allergy to his favorite food.”

etc. etc.