I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how and why I always knew we could trust Delphine, and I think I finally know why- Even when it looked like she had betrayed the clones- I always knew she hadn’t. I think it has something to do with their first kiss.
I don’t mean that first kiss they both consented to that led to sex, I mean their FIRST kiss. The one where Cosima kissed her, and Delphine was shocked and she fled.
Delphine’s job was to blend in, become part of Cosima’s life however she could, and not let her cover be blown. And if that was her soul mission, if it was always just to play her role as monitor, she would’ve let Cosima do whatever she wanted. She would’ve kissed back, pretended that everything was normal, but she literally froze. She was shocked and terrified and she left in a bundle of nerves, and I think that’s the thing that always assured me that even so close to the beginning, she wasn’t just playing a part.
I think that kiss scared Delphine, because she didn’t understand why she enjoyed it, why she didn’t want to pull away, why it was so easy for her to go back and kiss Cosima for real. Paul was bad at his job of blending in. He let Beth and eventually Sarah do whatever they wanted. He didn’t act like he was scared or nervous about the relationship, because he was simply playing a part. And then the thing that clued him in was when he suddenly felt differently about a woman who was supposed to have already been with for years.
But Delphine was instantly attached, terrified of this new feeling that she had for Cosima. She told Leekie about the kiss, and when she went back Cosima was perfectly fine with just being friends. Delphine could have easily continued her mission as friends from a safe distance. But she insisted they be more. Maybe it was partially just to be closer to her, but I think even then she really did want it. And even after their first time together, she didn’t tell DYAD about Kira. She cared from the very start, and from that very first time she was already using her position of power to protect a woman she barely knew but was suddenly feeling things for that she hadn’t even dreamed possible.